This story was written thanks to the Stocking Stuffer Author Auction were I signed up for a 2500 word one-shot. It's dedicated to gjoni who had such a great idea, that I couldn't put it into 2500 words. So thanks to her you're getting several chapters and I hope you enjoy it – but especially gjoni. It was a pleasure to be owned by you!

The Advent Calendar

Nov. 15th

Emily was in the attic, sorting through her large amount of holiday decorations, trying to decide what to use this year - what colours, which theme - so she could make a list of things she already had and wanted to use again and things she had yet to buy. And there were always new things to buy, she made sure of that.

While going through several boxes, she noticed one that had more dust on it than the others. She couldn't remember what was in it and curiosity took the better of her so she walked over and opened it. A little gasp escaped her mouth when she looked at the self-made decorations Lorelai had made as a child. Or the toys she had gotten. Somehow it was all connected to Lorelai's childhood. Memories started rushing through her – often not so pleasant ones. Without noticing Emily sat down on another dusty box, sorting through hers and Lorelai's past. She remembered toys Lorelai hadn't wanted, her refusing to put Lorelai's not so perfect self-made decorations on the tree and in turn Lorelai refusing to make more, since they wouldn't be good enough anyway. Oh yes, both of them were strong-willed. Finally she got to the bottom and another memory flooded her.

"Please, Mom. I need to have it. It has chocolates in it, for every day," an excited six-year-old Lorelai told her slightly annoyed mother.

"I know the concept of an Advent Calendar, Lorelai," Emily replied.

"Do I get one, please, Mom," Lorelai tried again. "There are pictures as well plus Linda will also get one," she added.

"Don't beg, Lorelai," Emily answered and even six-year-old Lorelai knew when not to go further when she really wanted something from her mother. So she picked another tactic.

"Did you have an Advent Calendar, when you were a girl?" she asked her mother five minutes later, when Emily was admiring some new dresses.

"No, I didn't," she replied curtly.

"But didn't you wish for one?" Lorelai went on. Emily looked at her child and asked herself why she had her heart set on some silly Christmassy picture with 25 doors and chocolate behind it. Not even good chocolate. But next to that thought she asked herself why Lorelai would think she wouldn't get it. She always got everything she wanted. She made sure that her daughter had everything she wanted. Yet, she hated begging and obedience was a virtue Emily Gilmore appreciated, plus she wanted to surprise her little girl with it, so she just replied "No. And I don't want to hear anymore about it, do you understand me? Now be a good girl and try this on," she said, holding up a skirt with lots of tulle. When she saw the disappointed look in her daughter's eyes, she nearly regretted her decision, but Lorelai's joy on Dec. 1st made up for everything. She was so happy over something not even worth 5$.

For some years Emily had always bought her an Advent Calendar and every time Lorelai loved it. When did she stop? And why? She couldn't remember. Probably she considered Lorelai too old at some point. All Emily Gilmore remembered was that over the years the wall between them got higher until Lorelai left. She tried to forget the horrible years without Lorelai and held onto the thought that she did come back. Reluctantly at first, but now she was coming every Friday without any obligation – sadly without Rory who was a journalist and often away – but instead often accompanied by her husband. And while Luke wasn't Emily's first choice she had learned to accept and even to appreciate him.

She remembered last Friday, the way Lorelai covered her growing belly with her hand and all Emily wished for was to be part of it this time. Not to miss it again. To get closer to Lorelai. But she didn't know how. That was the tragedy of her life. It wasn't that she didn't love Lorelai, not at all, but she just didn't know how to express her feelings. Too much had happened. She was too afraid of rejection, and as long as they did at least talk civilly to each other and Lorelai was coming to her without being forced Emily Gilmore was afraid of saying anything that could put the peace between them in danger.

Sighing she put the things back into the box, but the Advent Calendar and Lorelai's happy eyes lingered on her mind.