Disclaimer: You know how this works. Don't own Mass Effect, yada yada yada.

AN: This story came about from a small chat that I had when I was landing on Illos with one of my friends present. Though I wrote this piece, the thought was his.

"Joker, drop us on top of that bastard." As Commander Shepard and the other members of the ground team left, they didn't noticed the mischievous smirk on their pilot's face.

"On top of him, eh?"

Horrified screams filled the interior of the Mako as the three passengers inside were being tossed around as the vehicle spun and tumbled through the air. Not only were they coming in too fast, but Joker had screwed up the drop whilst dodging the geth ships scouring Illos' orbit. '

I can do it' Huh? John Shepard mentally spat as he struggled with the rocket boosters, trying to break the plummeting vehicle's airborne death roll. Behind him, Tali struggled to reroute as much power as she could to the element zero core, hoping that it would shrink enough of the Mako's mass to give them some small chance to survive. Next to her, Wrex clung onto his seat for dear life, cursing Joker and swearing that he'll break every brittle bone the crippled human's body if he survived this. Slowly, Tali's efforts slowed the Mako, though the commander still wasn't sure if it was enough.

"HANG ON!!!!!!" John screamed. The mako crashed into the rocks below, bouncing about the caverns thanks to Tali's effort in reducing the vehicle's mass. For just a moment, Shepard was certain that he heard someone aside from himself, Wrex, or Tali screaming, but the thought quickly disappeared with another impact to his head as the three few out of their seats and tumbled about. With a sicking crunch, the mako finally came to rest belly up.

With an enraged roar, the krogan battlemaster kicked the hatch open and the three crawled out of the wreckage, bloodied and bruised but still alive.

"I'll kill that scrawny little nitwit." Wrex growled as he thought about how to make the pilot suffer for as long as possible before the krogan would finally rip his intestines out.

"Not if I get him first, Wrex." Shepard spat. After a few more moments of Wrex and Shepard exchanging promises to rid the universe of one Jeff Moreau, Tali – the most level head member of the three – spoke up.

"We should be focusing on stopping Saren right now and not getting ourselves hung up on our less than pleasant descent.

"And how do you propose we do that?" Shepard shot back, gesturing to the wreckage to make his point. Two of the six wheels were completely torn off, the drive train was scrap, and the fuel cells were leaking into the soil. "No amount of omni-gel could fix that!"

"We need to..." Tali stopped mid-sentence in a gasp, her paw moving to cover her mouthpiece as she took in the sight before her. "Oh my!"

"What?" Shepard inquired before he too saw what had left the quarian speechless. Beneath the twisted pile of metal and battered stone laid the crushed form of a very familiar turian rouge specter in a pool of his own blood. The mako had completely crushed Saren's body from the neck down; only his severed head remained intact.

"Um, well..." Shepard began, rubbing his chin and wondering what should be said. "That was convenient." Behind him, Wrex began to chuckle.

"Well, Shepard, you did say to drop us on top of him." The three let themselves enjoy a good laugh before they were interrupted by a flash of crimson light emanating from Saren's head. Tendrils of electricity coursed through the ionized air as what flesh that remained on Saren's head boiled away, revealing the many intrusive implants given to the ex-specter from Sovereign. The flash finally disappeared and the three immediately drew their shotguns only to find that Saren's head, though now only a skull with cybernetic implants etched upon its surface with an evil glow pouring out from every socket, was present.

"I am Sovereign, and you shall not pass!" It uttered in an insidious voice. Shepard exchanged confused looks with his two crewmen, their stance now awkward instead of tense.

"Um, okay?" Shepard spoke.

"Fascinating." Tali commented.

"Well, what are you going to do about it," Wrex challenged as he motioned to the skull. "bite us to death?"

Sovereign/Saren's eye sockets flared an angry red even as it stayed helplessly still. "You cannot stop coming of the reapers! The citadel is mine!"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah." Wrex shot back before the krogan brought his massive foot down on the cybernetic skull.