Miscommunication Final

On his last day at NCIS, Bruce LaPaglia brought in a couple of bags with him. This had caught everyone's attention. But it wasn't until the end of the day that they were going to find out what he had brought with him. Everybody waited with anticipation and when the day finally ended he'd called up everyone together including Ducky and Abby.

"I've come bearing gifts," Bruce laughed as they all looked at each other. "First of all… We have for Tony… I know you're a sportsman mate. It took me ages to find an Australian football in the shop. Here you go," Bruce said.

"Wow thanks," Tony caught the ball that was handballed to him.

"Ziva… You were hard to buy for. So I got a mate to send over this dictionary of Australian American translation. I hope you like it," he gave the book to Ziva. "Hope you enjoy it. I know how much you like reading," Bruce said.

"Thank you. Perhaps now I can understand some of the things you have been saying no?" Ziva said as she started reading some of it.

"Ducky… I know how much you like stories. So, here's a book for you. Strange But True Australian stories," Bruce smiled. "You'll really like that," he added.

"Why thank you my dear boy," Ducky said as he graciously took the book.

"Jethro Gibbs," Bruce sighed. "Now you were really difficult to get a gift for," he said.

"It doesn't matter. You don't need to get me anything," Gibbs said. He was never one to exchange gifts with a lot of people.

"I wished you told me that before because I got you a book as well. A book on Australia's Military History," Bruce shrugged as he handed it over. "I thought of getting you a power saw but that's a little pricey," he laughed.

"Thanks," Gibbs said flatly.

"Okay," Bruce said. "I wanted to get you all something, that when you're wearing them you'll immediately think of me. So I got everyone a pair of thongs," the others thought he was joking until they saw the serious look on his face. There was a sudden silence. "These are really comfortable for down the beach as well," he added.

"What?!" Gibbs said. They all looked at each other with shocked and worried expressions. They weren't going to be wearing tight little panties out in public. "There's no way we're wearing thongs," Gibbs growled.

"Oh come on," Bruce said slowly. "I wear thongs wherever I go. They do feel nice and comfortable."

Ziva laughed. "You wear thongs out in public?" Abby asked. She was as open minded as they come but a guy wearing a thong out in public was even beyond her reasoning.

"Sure," Bruce said. "As often I can."

"Don't people say anything?" Ducky asked.

"Nope," Bruce answered.

"Thongs are flip flops," Ziva exclaimed as she pointed in her newly acquired dictionary triumphantly.

"Spoil my fun, Ziva," Bruce smirked. "I wanted to see their faces when I brought out these," he reached into a bag and pulled out thongs for Ducky, Gibbs, Tony and Ziva. "There you go," he looked into the bag. "Now, I get the feeling I'm missing someone…" Bruce's voice trailed off. "Oh yes, Abby," he smiled as he pulled out the last two items out of the plastic bags. "A pair of thongs for you. Oh and I know you love music so here's a CD of Aussie classic songs. I think you'll get a kick out of it," he said.

"My God. I'll play it the first chance I get," Abby said excitedly.

"That's good," Bruce smiled. "After a rough first week it's actually been great working with you lot," it wasn't such a fond memory the first week.

"Been good working with an Australian to," Tony said.

"If you ever down in the neighborhood again you have to swing by and visit," Abby said exuberantly and embraced him in a quick hug.

"Thanks Abby," Bruce replied. "I'll make sure I do," he said.

Tony and Bruce shook hands but exchanged no words. "Here's a trophy for you," Gibbs said and handed him a US NCIS badge. "There you go," he said.

"Thanks mate," Bruce replied. "It's been great working with you lot. It's been an experience that's for sure," he added. "And if you're ever in WA come and look me up."

"Washington?" Ziva asked.

"Western Australia," Bruce corrected as he donned his coat and put down the collar. "I'm not sure if I'll see you guys again before I go. I've got some packing to do and that," he told them. Who would have thought that he felt like he was missing them already? You had the cold but caring Ziva. The frat brother Tony. The Grandfather Ducky. Abby? Well Abby was Abby and then the boss slash father figure to the team. That was definitely something. Bruce went to leave. "G'day mates," he said with a wave.

Ducky cleared his throat which made Bruce stop in his tracks and turn around. "Once a Jolly swagman camped by a billabong under the shade of a coolibah tree," he sung. Soon the others tentatively joined in with singing the song. Bruce smiled… This had been planned for sure.

"And he sang as he watched and waited till his billy boil. You'll come a waltzing Matilda with me," Everyone sung. "Waltzing Matilda, Waltzing Matilda. You'll come a Waltzing Matilda with me. He sang as he watched and waited till his billy boil. You'll come a Waltzing Matilda with me."

Bruce almost laughed. The song sounded funny sung with the different accents but the effect was there. They'd put an effort into this and they sung it loud. They didn't care that other teams were looking on strangely at this.

Down came a jumbuck to drink beside the billabong
Up jumped the swagman and seized him with glee
And he sang as he tucked jumbuck in his tuckerbag
You'll come a waltzing matilda with me

Waltzing matilda, waltzing matilda
You'll come a waltzing matilda with me
And he sang as he sat and waited by the billabong
You'll come a waltzing matilda with me.

Down came the stockman, riding on his thoroughbred,
Down came the troopers, one, two, three.
"Where's the jolly jumbuck you've got in your tuckerbag?
You'll come a waltzing matilda with me

Waltzing matilda, waltzing matilda
You'll come a waltzing matilda with me
And he sang as he sat and waited by the billabong
You'll come a waltzing matilda with me.

Up jumped the swagman and plunged into the billabong,
"You'll never catch me alive," cried he
And his ghost may be heard as you ride beside the billabong,
You'll come a waltzing matilda with me

Bruce waited dutifully until they finished the song before stepping into the elevator. He gave them a smile before the doors closed. As soon as he was alone he bowed his head for a few seconds and wiped his eyes before laughing. "I hope they've been treating McGee as good," Bruce said as he was referring to his teammates back home.

McGee adjusted his jacket as he walked into the Bullpen of his NCIS… The US NCIS, he was so grateful to be home. This was where he belonged. This was where he understood things. Everyone had welcomed him back with a high level of exuberance and he sat down at his desk.

"You wouldn't believe the time I've had," McGee sighed. "You can't fathom how hard it is to understand Australians," he said.

"Probably not," Ziva replied as the others were too busy looking at their screens.

"Because things almost went from bad to worse, it's like they're from a whole different planet," McGee tried to explain. "We had a Barbie at a park then get this… In Australia we played a variation of an English game called French Cricket. Go figure," he said.

"Don't worry Probie," Tony said. "Everything's normal here," he said as he stood up and walked around.

McGee's jaw dropped. Tony was wearing flip flops. He saw Gibbs' feet and rubbed his eyes as if he'd just woken up. Gibbs and Ziva were wearing flip flops as well. Abby came up to welcome McGee back. He was relieved that she wasn't wearing flip flops. But she was singing…

"There was a redback on my toilet seat when I was there last night… I never saw him in the dark but boy I felt his bite. I jumped six feet into the air and when I hit the ground, that clucky old spider was nowhere to be found," she stopped singing. "Timmy… Welcome back it's been a long time," she said while wrapping her arms around his neck and shoulders. "I missed you… What's wrong?" Abby noticed his silence.

"Why do I get this funny feeling that the plane must have did a U-Turn?" McGee asked.

A/N: Hope you enjoyed this story. It was hilarious writing this. I wanted NCIS team to give Bruce a real good send off. LOL.

A/N 2: Does anyone want to see what McGee's time in Australia was like?