Hi, I'm finally back.

My love and regard for ones who have reviewed. My apology for taking so long. Not that I have been writing all the time for this chapter, because the matter of the truth is, I only update one chapter when I get the next one finished. That means this chapter had been done before I updated chapter 2, and the same to chapter 2 and 1. Actually I was just busy with drawing and all, as I said before, and the truth that I didn't want to update too soon XD No reason though.
Anyways, this is one hell of a killer chapter and it took me forever (a whole week, actually T_T)!!! I thought I was never gonna finish it because writing about Zero was damn painful! I practically collapsed right after finishing it, and I got sick for a whole week after. And the fact is, it was the longest chapter I've ever written. I'm kinda proud of it. A little bit.

And I'd like to reply to my lovely reviewers that I couldn't send my regard via email from the last time. If I forget anyone, shoot me!

El-chan: Aw did I make you cry? -headdesk- I'm sorry. But thank you for reading and reviewing, my dear! -hugs- Thank you for your Zero drawing for me too!

Tifa-chan: You know, your reviews here and in the FC totally made my day! I loved them so much! Thank you Tifa-chan, I will write more, ne?

Sha-chan: Haha yeah I do, indeed. As for your request...ugh you know this one is Angst and Supernatural right? I really want to add some more fluff, but I'm not sure if I can. I will try, alright? Thank you for your review! One more thing...Lavi for sharing, you asked? Well, he belongs to everyone, right? He's just mine in this fic and in my FC, so no worries XD As long as you love him enough, he's yours either.

Yumi-chan: You said you didn't know what to say but you left me your review after all. I was so glad, you know? Thank you so much! -glomps-

Time's up! -coughcough- Now back to the chapter~

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Summary:
As he the cold darkness turned to vanish into thin air, the sunshine herself came to the point of shattering into pieces. The rain would cease, the mist would fade, but the pain would forever remain in her immortality. Believing their love could see them through in death, the death that do them not part, she would choose to stay still, or to slip away? Zeki.

Warning in this chapter:
Spoilers from chapter 24. Just a little part, when Zero almost kissed Yuuki. It was just too sweet to deny.
Zeki. Not their supporter, please do not blame me.
Super angst and depressing this time, because it's Zero we're talking about, hello!
Okay my poetic writing was back!
No more sweetness this time.
Long.
This one was from Zero's POV! YAY!!!! I love Zero! My love for him is invincible!
Also if you want to understand this chapter completely, you should read chapter 2 first, they were kinda related.

Word Count: 4,843 *dies*

Disclaimer:
As usual, Julye doesn't own anything of VK, but she swears she will steal Zero from Hino-sensei soon. Very soon indeed.
Lavi: Jul doesn't need me anymore. Fine, farewell! -walks away-
Jul: -gasps- WAIT LAVI!! I'm sorry!!!
So eventually Jul still owns nothing but Lavi. Oh well~

3 . L a b o r e s . S o l i s

(Eclipse of the Sun)

And you've tried so hard to save me
How is it ever possible for you to save someone from themselves?
For all those years, all those times, you've kept on trying,
Wasted wishes drowning in the meaningless wishing well…

Because the unbreakable chains were still here, in my broken heart, and the cold door was still there, forever remained untouchable in my never-ending agony.

Why do you keep trying in vain?

He could not understand. For more than once, he thought this girl was stupid. No, hopelessly stupid, to be exact.
How was it possible for her to care that much for an inferior monster such as himself?
How was it possible for her to smile so sweetly at him after having him almost suck the dearly precious life that he treasured more than anything out of her oh-so-slim figure, like nothing had ever happened?
How was it possible for her to rip her angel wings apart and willingly jump off the golden mountain top to fall with him, to go down and down and down alongside him into the unfathomable darkness with no escape?
How was it possible for her…no, for him, to let her do it?

Stupid.

No longer did he know who to blame. Sure she was stupid, doing such trivial things for this soon-going-to-die and disgusting, he always made sure to add the word, night-creature. But that way he would be far more than a stupid fool for allowing all of those things to happen with closed eyes, absolutely incapable of withholding any of her obstinate attempt on getting closer to where she never should have been.

It obviously was him to blame for being stupid.

For being useless. Uncontrollable. Weak. Pathetic.
For being born in this cruel circle of life since day one.
For everything he had lost and for nothing he had become.

For everything and for nothing. For everything and for nothing. He had always been a perfect number of nothingness and meaninglessness. He always had.

And he wanted her to understand that. He would do anything and everything to make her understand. No matter how many times she said it was okay, no matter how many times she tried to make him understand that there was nothing to be ashamed nor to blame himself.
Because it was her who needed to understand. And it was him to blame.

The enormously morbid hunger for blood had come to lacerate his humanity and made a promise to lie beneath the frozen facade of his cold, soulless eyes until the day he finally let go of the painful struggle within and allowed the blood-thirsty monster to conquer all over. And then everything would no longer matter, and then there would be nothing but blood and blood and blood. Blood that would not only soak his tattered white shirt nor taint his already dead soul but blood that would cover his losing body, his losing heart, his losing spirit and his vision would be definitely painted in that sickening crimson hue. Such a beautiful picture, the irony would laugh eagerly, because everything would be showered in red and nothing else and the dully-silver rain would turn crimson as he would be standing there, waiting for it to pour down ceaselessly and bathing in it. The curse of his life would become nothing, the cruelty of his fate would vanish, the resentment and self-loathing would disappear completely and he would be left out with nothing but an irresistible crave for that red red liquid, the color of damnation he had come to hate with all his heart and all his soul.

Oh how he loathed what he had become
And how he feared what he would become.

But that was reality, and he was fully aware of it and what would be awaiting him at the dawn of this oh-so-long black night. No matter how hard he tried to run away from it, it would always come back to him. Just like her. She kept coming back to him and she kept dreaming her endless dreams that he never got to know what they were all about.
Him…
He was not like her, however. He did not dream because every second passed by was already his worsening living nightmare. It never once left him alone…the worst unending dream of himself sinking in the ocean of red and crimson and blood.
Her blood. Her heart. Her life.
Her everything.
All would melt into the color of red, inking and painting and showering his nightmare in the most painful shade of death. Her death.

Smiling and crying. Smiling and lying. Smiling and dying.

She would smile and she would die, no word would come out but amber irises filling with tears and shaking body covering with blood would be more than enough to cut through his already torn heart and send him straight to the bottom of the deepest and darkest raging Inferno, wounded soul would be swallowed mercilessly in eternal flames of never-ending agony and torture, for ever and for never.

No…No… NO!!!!!!!!

It couldn't be possible.
He couldn't take that. He wouldn't take that. No matter how many times those torturing nightmares had come crashing down on him, suffocating him, or even killing him over and over again, he still could not stand the miserable fear whenever it came to her. It had been haunting him all the time, the thought of her lying and dying in a pool of that damn color, tears kept falling and blood kept flooding yet that smile never once leaving her lips. It was all too much, too much for him to handle.
He could not stand it anymore. He thought he was going to burst into shards.

And then she came.
Just as before. Just as always.

He was still going to explode, the painful nightmare was still clinging onto him. His heart was covered and his thoughts entangled in the deadly maze of reality. His world was spinning around and the blackness was hugging him tighter.

How could it ever have felt so real? How could it ever be so real? So real…

And then reality was brought back to his doomed night as those soft soft hands reached out, and his ever oh-so-cold and emotionless face was immediately snapped out, overwhelming with the warmth that he knew only belonged to his Light.

"I found you…"

Her hands were so warm, so warm and her whisper was just so sweet that it even hurt him further and further, recalling of the horrible prospect that would come to his unlighted life sooner or later, and then he would…she would…
His bitterly mental voice trailed off, broken in tremulous fear and utter horror, only to find small hands squeezing tighter, determination spreading across pale white facade and concern burning inside big chocolate orbs.
And the warmth was still staying the same and the faint smile still lingering in the cold air.

Because she had found him again. Because she would never let go of him anymore. Because she was his Light and her warmth was his breath.
As long as the warmth was still there, surrounding him, overwhelming him, the pain would very soon fade away and go back to hide itself in the darkest layer of his heart.
As long as she was still here, he would fall over and over again.

I will fall and you will fall with me,
You will drown and I will take you down, down, down…

And so he fell.

'Because I want these gentle hands…'

Those hands that had been keeping all the glory and luminosity of Paradise, holding tight his pain and his joy, his sorrow and his non-existent happiness, those angelic hands that once had led him to his peaceful sleep, that once had been tainted in the redness of blood flowing from his torn neck just by holding his indifferent and unmerciful hand to keep him away from his living nightmare. Those gentle hands that always, always embraced him and his cursed life right from the beginning, those hands he had always been longing for all those years, all those times. He didn't just merely want them, he hopelessly longed for them, for what he knew too well only belonged to him in his dreams.
And he didn't dream.

'Because I want this kind smile…'

The brightest smile that had been blurring all the light of the immortal Sun and stealing all the splendors of the Day, the warmest smile that had reached out to his unbreakable, icy wall and crumbled it down with no tint of hesitation and no trace of fear, the kindest smile she had been holding still in front of his lonely door, waiting patiently for him to open it and let her in, allow her to warm him up with her ceaseless flame, bring him back to life with her never-ending rain, paint his world with her colorful heart, ease his pain with her soft soft hand, and stay there with him forever.
The most beautiful smile that he didn't just merely want. It was what he had wanted, he had needed, but most of all he had desperately longed for all those years, all those times. He wanted it so much, needed it so much, yet he couldn't do anything but want and need and long because he knew better than anyone that it had never belonged to him, and it never would, even in his dreams.
And he didn't dream.

So she would keep smiling and he would keep longing. They would keep going their way and never get to know what the other was holding still behind the dark curtain. As the twilight came to fill the cold air, he had got to see nothing but the pure white snow falling on the mountaintops, and there she stood, amazing shining for the whole universe to see. And when she filled him with her light and his emptiness overwhelmed in that ever kindest smile, he knew.
He knew that an angel had been sent to watch over him, to pull him out of his void, to rescue him.
He knew that he longed for her, not just her gentle hands and her smile and her light but her everything.
He also knew that he could not reach for her, could not have her, because she already belonged to someone else, her Charming King. Not him, never him.
He knew he never should have wanted such a thing.

So he dropped it.

It was so close, so close that he almost touched that smile and claimed it his. It was so close that he almost kissed her.
But he didn't.
Because he had no right to do that. He had no right to take anything more from her than he already had. Her purity has been tainted by his blood and her life had been defiled by his sin. She'd already been so close to his door, and it was his fault for letting her go this far, for letting all of those feelings escalate to this level, yet he still refused to let her come closer. He couldn't pull her deeper with him, he just couldn't.
And because he didn't sense a hand of the irony laying on them, binding his eyes and his mind, he never ever got to know that all those things, for all those years she had done, were just for him.
He never knew those gentle hands were destined to embrace him and no one else, and that kind smile belonged to one and only one person.
Him…
She was hesitant and she was confused and she was unsure, but she always knew what she wanted and what she was trying to do. She might be the light, but without him, she would be nothing, because he was the only thing and everything for her to shine.

But he had never known.
And he would never know.

It was so close that she almost touched the door and open it. It was so close that she almost got to taste her first kiss, with him.
But she didn't.
Because he had stopped. Because he had dropped it. And it hurt her so much finding herself once again standing alone in the world of black and red, restlessly staring at the door as the soft breath of sorrow continued to clench her aching heart, the bloody scent continued to pour down on her.
It hurt, it really did. She'd already been so close to his door, and when she thought she was going to make it through, he tossed her aside like a stone, blowing all her hope away. And she still got to know nothing at the end.
Because just like him, never ever had she imagined of the ironic truth that the key which could unlock the door was no one else than herself. And what had been hidden behind that door all the time beings was nothing but a place, a very very tiny space that had been kept from the very beginning for one and only one person.
Her…
A place for her to stay forever…

But she had never known.
And she would never know.

Thus a wheel of time had been set again. They kept going their way and never got to know what the other was holding still behind the dark curtain. He would run and she would chase. He would tell her to stay away and she would ignore his words and come closer. It would be a never-ending circle, he just knew it, because he would always keep pushing her away from his sight, for her own safety, and she, being as stubborn as the way she was, would keep on following him everywhere.

A long way to nowhere.

She would keep on trying, over and over again. Because she wanted him to live, and to her, his life was far more important than hers and her King's and everyone's else, and she would willingly sacrifice herself and her purity and everything just to save him. Even if he would never forgive her for doing so.
She didn't mind.

And he would keep on shoving her away, over and over again. Because he didn't want to haze the pure light and pull her closer into the darkness than he already had. Because he cared for her wholeheartedly, and hurting her was the last thing he ever wanted to do in his entire so-called life.
Because he wanted to keep her safe… She never knew a thing, but just like her, he treasured her precious life more than anything in this world, and he would sacrifice himself and his damned life and everything he ever had just to protect her, to save her. Even if it would make her hate him forever.
He didn't mind.
He just wanted her safe, that was all he ever wished for.
Because he was nothing and she was everything.
His everything.

She had never known and she would never get to know and he would never let her know.
Because, unlike her, he was hardly hesitant and he was barely confused and he was never unsure. He always knew what he wanted and what he was trying to do. For her.
Because he knew that deep down inside, he had always had a feeling for her.

Because Goddammit, he loved her.

He loved her.

More than anything. More than he could ever know. He did, he truly did.
Always and always. He had loved her yesterday. He did love her today. And he would love her tomorrow, and the day after tomorrow, and the days afterward.
From the beginning of life to the end of time.
Make it forever.

But she never knew. Never had, never would.
And he would not let it happen.

The Dark Knight was fallen in love with the Princess of Light, but he never let a single word come out, because he did not believe in dreams and the rainbow colors entwined in such fairy tales. His so-called life was like a broken mirror that every time he stared at it, he would see nothing but the shadow of himself reflected by the crimson of hunger in his eyes and the cruel laughter of darkness embracing every inch of his everlasting sorrow. As the gear of fate had settled, his name had been cursed beyond measure, and the ever-living nightmare was an ironic present he had received for reluctantly signing his own name in the game of bloody madness.
A mystic's myth or fable, truth or fairytale, it was all the same. The curse of insanity still lied within his heart and his mind and his spirit and his soul, imprisoning himself to the cruelty of the night, and chaining his love to the silver cage of anger and hatred and resentment and fear and loneliness. As the days died alongside his once humanity and all the bloody tears flowing back, stinging the inside of his broken amethyst glasses, he thought he had lost it. The love must have been eaten up, and he would be chained in there forever.

But she came.

You came into my world, saw through my eyes…

The icy wall he had tried so hard to set was crumbled down.
The apathetic and indifferent mask he had put on was taken off, revealing the silver cage with all of his anger and hatred and resentment and fear and loneliness.
And all of them were faded away one by one as his darkening lavender color withering at every single step that brought her closer to him.
That was close. So close that she could almost touch the door. One step closer, and she would know.

You walked through the wall
And burst into the cold darkness
Already a legend of Light
Like an unwashed phenomenon
You strayed into my frozen arms
And there you stayed…
With the promise to stay with me forever,
You fell for the spell I was under…

For the first time he had laid his tormented eyes on her, he could see Heaven falling into the crimson-amber eyes burning with love and light. As for all those years, all those times, when she was trying so hard to remain by his side and shower him with her love and fill his void with her life, he was struggling painfully with everything inside so as not to hurt her, and not to love her.
However, through all the laughter dropping from her red red lips and all the tears shedding from her beautiful eyes, she'd conquered his heart, entirely. And he had failed, sweetly and miserably.
The cage was broken and all the anger and hatred and resentment were slipping back into the depths of his soul. He tried his best to keep the fear and loneliness still to cover his love in the darkness, so she would never get a chance to open the door. And she would never know.

Yet he couldn't help but love her.
So much. Too much.

Gently and silently and mildly he loved her…
It was in her eyes that the sun was burning in love,
It was in her heart that the light was pure as winter snow,
It was in her tears that the crystal raindrops fell, piercing his heart and melting his soul
She fell and his world would crumble down
She laughed and a faint smile would find its way to his frozen lips
Following a ray of light all the night and day through
All became the same peace of life when she was near.

Strongly and deeply and passionately he loved her…
Like a wind of hurricane,
Like the candles burning without any resilience,
He battled his shadows and demons in every single second of his life,
And with her by his side, smiling and offering and sacrificing,
He would kill and he would save,
He would conquer the Night and he would die.

Desperately and hopelessly and agonizingly he loved her…
Tracing the trails through the broken mirror that reflected every single piece of his own sorrow and horror and misery and despair,
Spinning in circles of the doomed life with unmeasurable hates and unbearable loathings and unshed tears.
He dived into the ocean of red and crimson and scarlet
Fearless amber boring into tortured amethyst
His heart stung and his soul broke
He would ignore and he would run
He would turn and he would keep on shoving her away.

With all his heart and all his soul he loved her.
Just because he loved her.
So much. Too much.

Silent as the wings of a bloody song
Spinning in never-ending agony
Coming from the cold deserted and icy sands
Painted in utter black of death and red of horror
His love for her would forever stay as a hazy shadow in the darkest night.

And when the mockery of fate raised its laughter again, the chilling sounds showered his world in another bloody rain as he felt the raging Hell reached out for his damned life one more time.

The Sun faded away. The Day turned gray. The Light died down.

The Princess was stolen and fallen forever.

As the Light turned to Dark and his Angel fell into the never-ending night, the Moon fell down and the living Hell was finished eating up the last piece of his soul, and there he collapsed, diving into the inviting Death and he himself had finally escaped from the fallen Sunshine.
To become an Eclipse of the Sun.

To be continue~

Woo, that was the last piece of my prologue! And the last thing I'll ever write in a long time ahead. School will restart tomorrow, which means I'm not able to write anything more until my summer break. Oh what a long time...
Enough of complaining. For now, thank you so much for reading. I know this chapter was depressing, but I couldn't help it. The depression will be increasing at each chapter and either will be the length. I am sorry if I ever upset you with my writing, but their story is a tragedy itself right at the beginning, I can't go any other way but this.
Hope you understand.
Criticisms and flames are welcome (just in case you are a Zeki lover. If not, no thanks~)

~Julye

Reviews make me happy. And when I'm happy, I can write a lot. So please do not hesitate to drop me your review. I sure will read them and reply, you know that.
Besides, don't you think the green button below is cute? :D

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