A/N: Okay, I didn't think I would be doing this because I intended the last story to be a standalone but the idea came to me and I decided to see where it would go. This is a sequel to Chuck vs the Missing Years. This is basically a what-if on a what-if for those of you who thought the happily-ever-after was too fluffy. The timeline is a few months after the last chapter of Chuck Vs TMY. If I had more foresight, this story would have taken place instead of the final chapter of the last but it only came to me after the fact...so what can you do?

Synopsis: Familiar faces from Chuck's past return, Sarah hasn't been entirely truthful, and Chuck doesn't know who to believe.

Disclaimer: I don't own Chuck. Boo.

Chapter 1:

The clock on the wall ticked like a bomb ready to blow, the two hands situated neatly at the four and half mark. Sarah sighed and wondered what had happened to her day. There were still three open files sitting on her desk awaiting her appraisal and she hadn't even finished analyzing the first.

Sarah stared at the clock. If there was any truth in the old adage about the boiling pot, then perhaps she could slow time just long enough to make it out of the office by five.

No such luck. The material was interesting enough and she was flattered the agency would seek her consultation. Though she would never be able to take part in the actual capture, she still felt like she was doing her bit to make the world a better place. Sometimes when her body itched for the excitement that was her old life, that thought was all she had to contend with.

Just as she felt like she was finally getting on track, her eyes drifted from the series of surveillance photos to the framed photograph sitting on the edge of her desk. She sighed, acknowledging that she had no hope of completing the report today. She picked up the frame and examined it ruefully, wishing her sister-in-law had given her fair warning before taking the shot. Her husband beamed at the camera with a smile so wide she could almost make out his back molars while her own smile was far more subdued. It wasn't fair; she had been startled and it gave the false impression that her husband was far happier to be with her than she was to be wrapped in his arms.

You're getting as bad as Chuck, she scolded and put the frame back. She was supposed to be the diligent one, the one who was always on task but today she wanted nothing more than to escape the four nondescript walls of her office.

Fridays never used to mean anything to Sarah. Work was every day of the week, every moment of her waking and sometimes sleeping hours. There were no holidays too sacred, commitments too important, and plans too ingrained that she couldn't discard when the moment arose.

That all changed two short years ago, and now Fridays meant family dinner at her sister-in-law's. After years of disappointing her with cancellations and lame excuses, they promised they would never do it again. And save for the trump-worthy events—her husband's game launch, a mishap in the kitchen that required seven stitches to his hand, and most recently Ellie's delivery, they had made good on that promise. If they didn't, they were sure they would never hear the end of it.

At a quarter to five, Sarah packed her things and left the office and the files behind. Her bag felt strangely light and empty on her shoulder. She might sneak in a few hours on the weekend if her husband had something to do but she made it a rule never to take work home with her.

As she walked down the hallway, Sarah managed a few polite smiles towards her coworkers. For the most part they ducked their heads and avoided her gaze but a few ventured as far as to wish her a nice weekend.

She sighed. It was undeniable that a part of her yearned for their acceptance. Their fear of her was irrational, but the fact she worked unseen in the building undoubtedly drew suspicion. Her own natural unease with strangers had its hand in doing the rest, dividing her from the rest of her colleagues. She wasn't like them though; them with their quaint little lives, round-table coffee breaks, and nth-day-accident-free pander from HR. Her own life was complicated, and her presence here was merely a mime of theirs. When necessary she integrated herself into the cover and took the occasional shift at the front, but her incompetence probably instilled a good dose of jealousy to add to their misgivings.

Why did she get her own office when she couldn't even manage the wicket? How come the department head never gave her heck for coming in late? How come she didn't have to show at mandatory company meetings? The accusations were endless.

As Sarah slipped into the driver's seat of her beloved Porsche, she knew she was just adding one more item to the long list. It had been two years now, and she still struggled with the idea of being normal.

She wondered if she would ever know what that word meant.

_

Despite all her skill, Sarah could not escape the inevitable rush hour congestion. She sat blocked on all sides, forced into a standstill. The radio was beginning to grate on her nerves so she switched it off and turned down the window just a crack, letting the air conditioning go to waste. Flicking her hair against the breeze of smog-infested air, Sarah wondered to herself whether this was what normal meant.

Guilt crept into her thoughts and she shook her head, trying to physically ward it off. Thoughts like that would upset Chuck, and ergo, herself. She hated having this much idle time; it allowed her stubborn conscience to speak its mind and these days, it never had anything good to say.

You should have told Chuck, it accused.

Yes, she knew that but after they got back together, things had been hard. Neither of them had a job and much to her chagrin, they had to move back in with Chuck's sister. The tension in that home, the struggle she felt with Chuck's absence of mind—compounded with ending a career that had meant everything to her for the last decade, made a joke out of the word 'difficult'. With no friends, no funds, no past to rely on, the agency had tried their hardest to make her reconsider.

Sarah tried to find honest work, but there was always a reason or other for being turned down. She never confronted the agency about it, but she was sure they had a hand in that.

She couldn't handle relying on Chuck, it wasn't fair. It was like expecting a blind man to lead the way. She hated to disappoint him, and living under Ellie's scrutiny magnified all her failures to live up to the woman's brother.

So when the time came and the agency offered her work, nothing serious, she agreed. They gave her the cover she needed to satisfy her sister-in-law, the money she needed to move her and Chuck into their own place, and the life of excitement she thought she'd have to live without. In short, they gave her everything she could want…all in exchange for one little white lie.

You need to tell him.

No. She didn't. For the past few months she felt like things had finally returned to the way they used to be. Ellie loved her and more importantly, Chuck loved her.

She couldn't lose that again.

_

Sarah stepped into the apartment and before she could even throw down her bag, Chuck hugged her from behind, burying his head in her hair.

"Chuck!" she gasped and for a second all her spy senses were on high-alert. Either she was getting rusty or Chuck was getting good at sneaking up on people.

"Hello, Mrs. Bartowski," he greeted, nuzzling her ear. She giggled, the sensation sending shivers down her spine.

Sarah spun around so that she could get a good look at her husband. He grinned like the loveable nerd he was but there was something else in his eyes. A rare smugness she never encountered when they were in public; Chuck looked as if he knew exactly what she was about to do.

She did it anyway. Yanking on his tie, she pulled him into a long, deep kiss as if they had been separated for days and not the hours since the morning. She ran her hands through his soft, beautiful hair, trying to hide the moan that nearly escaped her lips. Those damnable curls were her personal kryptonite. That, and the unwavering warmth of his chocolate eyes.

"Long day at work?" he asked with a wag of his brows.

For a second, Sarah almost told him what she'd seen today. About the surveillance photos, the murder victims and the list of names. But that wasn't their life anymore. She wasn't about to be the one to draw through Chuck's new life with a permanent marker.

"Much too long," she agreed.

Chuck's arms tightened, pressing their bodies so close together she could feel the calm rhythmic beat of his heart against her cheek.

"How do you do it?" he asked, pressing his lips to her temple. She could feel his breaths, so even and warm, hover over her.

"Do what?" she asked, looking up into his eyes.

"Count bills. Deal with rude customers. Deposit cheques for people on their lunch break," he said. "You can do so much better. I know you can."

The guilt of it made her want to flinch. White lies. They are all innocent white lies.

Sarah wanted to ask Chuck how he did it. Look at her that way, as if she had all the answers in the world, all the solutions to his problems, all the strength to lift mountains and change the fate of the world with a touch of her finger.

She smiled, unsure how to answer. She wanted to tell him the truth, but looking into those eyes, she didn't see how she could. He didn't remember anything; he didn't know the person she once was. She was already grateful enough that he wanted to be with her despite the fact she was none of the things she had been. It made her love him all the more.

"Sarah?"

Sarah looked up and realized she was taking too long to reply. "I like it," she said, another white lie. "I don't mind."

He freed her from his grip and she was instantly aware of the loss. She felt her body drift without him to secure her in place, and she wondered if it had been something she said. But her worries were quickly placated when his hands cupped her chin, his palms resting perfectly against her cheeks.

"I don't want you to feel like you are there because of me," he said, looking her dead in the eye. "I want you to be happy."

Sarah didn't know if words could describe how she felt. "Oh, Chuck," she whispered.

"Because we have money. The game's selling well and you don't have to work so hard." He looked at her and she thought what he really meant was I can take care of you now. I can be that person you've been waiting for.

"Chuck…" she uttered. Her eyes began to fill with tears and she had to close her eyes to hide them. What had she done to deserve him? She leaned into him, her cheeks brushing against his day-old stubble. It was the perfect contrast between smooth and rough.

"I want you to be happy, Sarah," he repeated, and with one finger pried her chin upwards to face him.

Sarah wanted to slap her foolish husband. "Of course I'm happy," she said. "How could you think otherwise?" She kissed him, hoping her actions could speak for themselves. She had never been very good with words.

"And I love my job, I'm happy there." She smiled for him, putting as much truth behind her words as she could. But at the end of the day, she knew if she wasn't being a hundred percent honest, she was still a liar.

Chuck smiled back. "Okay. Do you want to change and then we'll hop over to Ellie's?"

Sarah nodded, relinquishing herself from him. He wore a similar expression on his face. Separating, even if it was only for a few moments, was still difficult.

As she walked down the hall, she stole a glance at her husband. He was calling Ellie, telling her they'd be over soon.

It tore at her that she was still lying to Chuck after they'd promised to start over with their new lives, but she just couldn't see the harm. All wives lied to their husbands, whether it was feigning an interest in their favorite sports team, pretending to like that one insufferable friend of theirs, or fibbing about the price of the latest article of clothing bought. Harmless. Little. Lies.

You keep telling yourself that.

Sarah sighed. She would.

_

"Heads up. Ellie's never been one for subtlety," Chuck had warned before they stepped into his sister's home. Sarah had laughed.

"About what?" she'd asked with a shrug.

Chuck had responded by rolling his eyes. "Is that all you've got? Playing dumb isn't going to work."

Indeed. Sarah thought she had prepared herself but she could never prepare enough. They'd never explained anything specifically to Ellie about the past, so it had taken some time to win the girl over; especially since she lacked the same faith Chuck had in her.

Things were finally good now, now that Sarah had finally settled down with her brother and the two of them had dependable, respectable careers. She could tell Ellie was still worried though, as if at any moment she might abandon her brother and leave all over again.

Today the elder Bartowski was too preoccupied with the new addition to her family to pry into her brother's.

"Ellie, you look great!" Sarah exclaimed, as she gave a brisk hug to the slightly distracted brunette. "I can't believe you had a baby last week. You can hardly tell."

Ellie laughed nervously. "Well it's amazing how many calories you can burn when you don't sleep," she muttered. "I haven't been so sleep-deprived since my residency days."

Despite the fact she had dark circles under her eyes and her hair had been messily pushed back into a ponytail, Sarah thought she still looked beautiful. The fact she felt comfortable enough (though she may have merely forgotten) to change out of her robe and pajamas was endearing.

"Chuck! There's my baby brother!" Ellie exclaimed and ran up to hug him as well. "Speaking of babies…"

Chuck laughed, rolling his eyes when Ellie wasn't looking. Sarah caught it though. "You held off for all of one minute, Sis, I'm impressed."

Ellie remained undeterred. "I'm just saying…you're not getting any younger either. What are you waiting for?"

Sarah ventured into the kitchen to help Devon. If she tuned her hearing she might have been able to catch the exchange between the siblings but she preferred not to.

"Don't mind her," the man affectionately referred to as 'captain awesome' informed. "She hasn't slept in awhile."

Judging by the much subdued manner in his speech, Sarah guessed the same for Devon.

"She thinks it would be a great idea if you had kids now so our kids could play together."

Sarah tilted her head, still trying to ignore the conversation in the background. "Well if Chuck and I waited another couple years, they could babysit," she joked.

Devon smiled. "Don't tell her you said that," he warned. "That would be so not—"

Sarah rolled her eyes, suppressing a laugh. "Awesome," they said in unison. Devon smiled and held up his hand, which she heartily high-fived.

_

After dinner the entire family gathered on the living room couch with all eyes focused on the latest addition. Sarah had initially declined the honor of holding the baby but Ellie was insistent. No doubt the brunette hoped Sarah would feel inclined enough to have one of her own if she spent enough time with one.

"I can't believe how big he's gotten," Sarah awed, shifting her arms to the weight of something so small and incomprehensibly important. She felt like she was cradling a golden feather, where even the slow exhalation of her breaths could rouse the sleeping treasure.

Ellie giggled beside her. "Relax, Sarah, he's not made of glass."

If only. Glass was far more durable.

Sarah realized she was holding the baby awkwardly when he began to squirm. She flushed with embarrassment and looked pleadingly at her husband, hoping he would take him off her hands. But Chuck's eyes were fixated on the now grimacing baby.

"Uh, I think you should take him back," Sarah said, beginning to panic. The baby clearly didn't like her and she had about three seconds to hand him off before he let everyone know.

"You're fine," Ellie said, smiling broadly at her.

Chuck reached out and stroked a tendril of the baby's hair and in an instant, he was quiet again. Sarah watched in awe. She had no doubt he would make a wonderful father.

"William Weston Woodcomb," Chuck stated with an amused glance at Devon. "That's quite a mouthful."

Devon shrugged. "It has a nice ring to it. And if he doesn't like it, we'll just tell him that a bad name builds character."

Sarah looked at Chuck and he met her gaze. She didn't have to be a spy to guess that he was thinking what possible alliterations they could make with a last name like Bartowski. It wasn't the first time she'd ever considered having children, and it certainly wouldn't be the last, but she knew she wasn't ready. Chuck may be the perfect father but she was anything from a suitable mother.

Sarah smiled and just then, the baby yawned and opened its eyes. When she looked down, Sarah felt like all the air had been sucked out of the room and she clutched the swaddling blanket tighter, fearing she would lose her grip.

She knew the newborn in her arms held no resemblance to Chuck and certainly none to her, but staring down into those innocent eyes, she forgot for a moment that he wasn't hers. With Chuck's arm around her, the two of them staring down at the precious bundle, she thought there couldn't be anything more perfect.

Sarah was suddenly filled with a sense of deep longing. Looking into Chuck's eyes, he seemed to shift back, afraid to let her see that he wanted it too.

"So?" Ellie prodded anxiously. "When do you think you'll have children?"

Sarah held her breath. Chuck's amnesia wasn't the only reason for their lengthy engagement; everyone knew what happened after kissing in the tree and marriage.

"I don't know," she said, unsure whether she was lying white or outright. On the outside everything looked normal—stable, but her relationship with Chuck was still new and fragile. Having a child felt like playing with fire and she wasn't ready to throw chaos into what was already so perfect.

"Don't know?" Ellie asked, clearly not satisfied with the answer.

"Ellie—" Devon chided gently, throwing her a look which she promptly ignored.

"Sarah and I are taking things slow," Chuck cut in. Sarah wanted to laugh; they said it so often they should make it their personal motto.

"Slow?" Ellie repeated, wrinkling her brows. "You guys have been together for almost seven years. I think slow is an understatement."

"Ellie…" Chuck warned. Sarah kept quiet and focused all her attention on the baby. In another ten seconds she would be forced to defend her answer, but for now, she just wanted to pretend that this simple life was hers.

And baby makes three…She held out her pinky finger and the baby latched on, grabbing it tight with its tiny fist. It was a strong grip, one full of life and promise.

Sarah smiled. This could all be hers if she wanted. The only question was, did she?

So.....how was that? There's been a bit of a time shift so if you didn't understand something, please ask. Reviews are always appreciated. Thanks for reading.