A/N: I was doing chem homework and watching Countrycide and this popped into my head and wouldn't leave me alone. I really shouldn't watch Torchwood while doing boring homework. This is set shortly after Jack returns from the Year That Never Was. Jack has been gone for 4-5 months and he hasn't explained to anyone what happened. Ianto has accepted Jack's date offer but he is still pretty mad at him. And Jack takes The Year That Never Was into consideration for his answer to Gwen's question, but he considers a year to be what they remember and doesn't include the Year That Never Was in that time.
Disclaimer: In my dreams I own Torchwood, in reality I don't. This is reality.
"Looks like we're stuck in the Hub tonight." Tosh said. "All the roads are closed and the storm is only getting worse."
"Okay, I know we have sleeping bags around here somewhere so why don't we get them set up. We can use the night as a team bonding night. We can even pull out the Wii again." Jack said smiling.
Ianto pulled out the sleeping bags and set them up around the workstations while the rest of the team went to the boardroom to set up the Wii.
They played for a few hours, Ianto winning most of the games when he played, until everyone was tired and ready to settle down for the night.
"Okay, here's a question for everyone." Owen said. "When was the last time you went to the pub and drank until they kicked you out? I did it last night."
"Before I joined Torchwood." Gwen said.
"I don't think I ever have." Tosh said quietly.
"Two and a half months ago." Ianto said, ignoring Jack's questioning look.
"I guess it's me then. Seventy-five years ago, give or take a few." Jack told them.
Everyone fell into a not quite comfortable silence, shifting occasionally to attempt to relieve the tension.
"Oh, I have one." Gwen said suddenly. "How many people have you shagged in the last year? Two for me."
"Well there's a surprise." Owen said, rolling his eyes. "There have been too many for me to count. Women just can't resist my body."
"One." Tosh said, playing with the edge of her sleeping bag.
"Four." Everyone looked at Ianto in surprise, though Jack quickly looked down so no one would see the pain in his eyes, but he refused to elaborate.
When Jack looked up again he was smiling and his eyes were sparkling.
"Once again I have to ask: are we including non human life forms?" Jack's grin grew wider when Tosh, Owen and Gwen threw their pillows at him. Jack laughed and threw the pillows back at them.
Ianto got up silently and made his way to their makeshift kitchen to get himself a cup of coffee.
Jack noticed Ianto leave and followed him quietly, leaving the others to their pillow fight.
"I really don't want to talk to you right now sir." Ianto said when he saw Jack in the doorway.
"Ianto please listen to me." Jack begged, walking into the room and closing the door behind him.
"I really don't care to hear another story about a boyfriend you once had." Ianto brushed past Jack to grab a new bag of coffee beans, refusing to look at him.
"Ianto, in the last year I have only had sex with 3 people and one...one I didn't really have a choice about." Jack said quietly. "And that includes during my time away."
Ianto stiffened before turning to look at Jack.
"Only 3 people?" Ianto asked hesitantly.
"I swear Ianto, only three people and you were one of them."
"Why?" Ianto asked, putting the coffee beans down and watching Jack carefully.
"No time." Jack replied. "And no one else came close to being as amazing or appealing as you."
"What did you mean when you said you didn't have a choice about one of the people you had sex with?"
Ianto saw Jack flinch slightly and watched him look away before he forced himself to meet Ianto's eyes with his own pain filled ones. Ianto wanted to go to him, but he stayed where he was, leaning against the counter and trapping his hands behind him so he wouldn't go running to his Captain. He had to be sure Jack was telling the truth not just telling him what he wanted to hear so he could get him into bed again.
"I...it wasn't my choice. It happened while I was away and I just...I can't talk about that yet. I'm sorry Ianto. I want to tell you everything, I really do, but I'm just not ready." Jack said. A tear escaped and rolled down his cheek and Jack didn't even bother to brush it away. "I meant what I said before. I came back for you and I want to do it right this time. If you're willing to take me back of course."
Ianto quickly walked over to Jack and pulled him into a hug. Jack broke down and sobbed in Ianto's arms, clutching the young man as close as possible.
"It's okay Jack. Whatever happened you're back now and you're safe." Ianto said, rubbing Jack's back soothingly. "And of course I'm willing to take you back. I agreed to a date didn't I?"
"Yeah. As long as it isn't in an office." Jack said with a little laugh.
They stood together quietly, just holding each other for comfort and reassurance, as Jack's sobs died down and his grip slowly loosened.
"It sounds like the others have quieted down and they're probably asleep by now so why don't we go lie down in that thing you claim is a bed." Ianto said, pulling away from Jack but keeping hold of his hand.
"You probably shouldn't stay with me. Not if you want to get any sleep." Jack paused and suddenly looked horrified. "I don't mean that! I swear I can behave myself. It's just I've been having nightmares lately. I'd keep waking you up with them if you stayed with me."
"Jack, you having nightmares is just another reason for me to stay." Ianto said, leading Jack to his office and bedroom. "I'll be there to help you with them. You don't have to deal with them on your own."
"I don't deserve you Ianto Jones." Jack said quietly.
"I may be mad at you Jack but that doesn't mean I don't still care about you." Ianto told him. "Now go get changed and ready for bed. I'll be waiting when you're done."
Ianto pulled out two pairs of Jack's pyjamas from his dresser and threw one to Jack.
"I'm borrowing your pyjamas because I don't have any here anymore. Is that alright?" Ianto asked.
"Of course." Jack immediately replied before going into the bathroom to change.
When Jack came out of the bathroom Ianto was changed and lying in bed waiting for him. Jack crawled into the bed and curled against Ianto, instantly relaxing in the younger man's familiar embrace.
"Ianto?"
"Yes Jack?"
"This may not be appropriate and you can tell me if it is none of my business, but you said that you have shagged four people in the last year?" Jack asked hesitantly.
"You and three others while you were gone." Ianto said softly, stroking Jack's hair. "I missed you so I went out and got drunk which led to shagging. It didn't make anything better, if anything it made things worse, so I stopped and just tried to cope. I hated being without you though."
"I'm sorry Ianto. I didn't mean to be gone that long." Jack said, curling tighter against Ianto.
"Just promise that next time you run off you'll leave a note or something so I don't get worried sick about if you've been kidnapped or something."
"I don't plan on leaving again but if I do I will do my best to tell you somehow." Jack promised.
They were silent for a few minutes, enjoying each other's company and being back together, when Jack spoke again.
"Ianto?"
"Yes Jack?"
"I just want to tell you, because if I don't do it now I'll lose my nerve and I won't tell you and I really want you to know. And it was really all I could think about while I was away and I don't want anything to happen before I tell you." Jack said quickly, rambling because he was nervous.
"What is it Jack?" Jack took a deep breath before he replied.
"I love you Ianto Jones."
Ianto smiled and kissed the top of Jack's head where it was resting on his chest.
"I love you too Jack." He said. "Now let's get some sleep."
****
Ianto was woken by Jack's nightmares three times that night.
Three times Jack woke screaming in pain.
Three times Ianto held Jack tightly and reassured him that he was alive and that no, he wasn't dreaming.
Three times Ianto heard Jack, still half asleep, tell him that he, and the rest of the team, had died, that he had watched as the Master killed them and he couldn't do anything about it.
Three times Jack fell asleep after telling Ianto he was sorry and that he loved him.
Three times Ianto was happy he was there to take care of Jack.
****
"Hey do either of you have any idea where Jack and Ianto are? It doesn't look like they slept in their sleeping bags." Gwen said when she woke up at 10:00 the next morning.
"They're probably off shagging in the archives." Owen mumbled, rolling over and going back to sleep.
"I think Jack had a call to take this morning and Ianto was going to take notes about it." Tosh said when she noticed Jack's office door was closed. "I'll go check if they're done."
Tosh walked to Jack's office quickly and knocked on the door lightly before she entered.
"Ianto?" she called softly.
"Down here Tosh." Ianto's soft reply drifted from the hole in the floor.
Tosh walked over and crouched beside the hole, peering down cautiously to see Jack asleep and curled against Ianto while Ianto stroked his back and hair lightly.
"He had a rough night and just fell asleep again." Ianto whispered. "I don't want to wake him just yet."
"I told Gwen that you two were in a conference call so that should give you some more time." Tosh whispered back.
She carefully slid her phone out of her pocket and managed to take a few pictures without Ianto noticing.
"Thanks Tosh." Ianto whispered, smiling up at her
"You're welcome Ianto." Tosh said standing up. "Just try not to get hurt."
"I'll do my best." Tosh smiled at him and started to walk away but turned back when Ianto called her name. "Last night he told me that he loves me."
"Lunch tomorrow then?" Tosh asked, grinning madly.
"With a huge piece of chocolate cake." Ianto promised.
When Ianto heard the office door close he turned his attention back to the man in his arms.
"I love you Jack." He whispered.
Jack smiled in his sleep and hugged Ianto closer while Ianto let himself relax and fall asleep once more.
END