Author's Note: I got this idea one day while I was cleaning the kitchen sink, and thought it'd be funny to write about. It's mostly pointless. But I love the idea anyway. xD
Disclaimer: All the contents of this fanfiction belong to Marvelous Interactive Inc. and Natsume.
Today… was strangely quiet.
Which is really saying something, because it's normally quiet to begin with.
Ever since my shift started today, there hasn't been a single customer. From my position in the kitchen, it didn't look like anyone was going to be coming anytime soon. I leaned up against a crate of something in the kitchen. Might as well relax a bit, right?
Moments later, the door slammed open and someone came running into the inn. I winced. By the thundering sound of boots, that narrowed it down to only a few people. By the way they immediately ran up to the counter and sat down on one of the bar stools and spun in a circle; I knew it could only be one person. Luke.
I stood up, only to find him resting his chin on his fist with his other hand rapping on the counter in an uneven and annoying tune.
"Hey, Chase!" He waved. I just glanced at him. "It's funny seeing you here and all-" Is he for real? I knew he lacked the intelligence to even be compared to a pebble thrown into the bottom of a trench, but I didn't think he was that clueless.
"I work here, genius." I cut him off; making sure my voice was filled with malice and displeasure. Of course I was over-reacting. I don't deny that. It adds to the well-needed humor.
Luke just grinned in response. I didn't know how to reply, so I walked to the sink and began cleaning a few dirty dishes that piled up. Still, he remained silent.
"So, Chase," Oh, damn. The silence has been broken. "Are you a cat person, or a dog person?" That was a fairly… strange question.
I turned off the faucet and thought for a second. "You know, I'm not much of an animal person. But I guess I like cats more." Luke snickered.
"I like dogs. They're loyal and trustworthy and fun to play with!" What a surprise. Ironically, both Luke and dogs seem to have sort of a fetish for trees and things that come off them.
…I hope they don't share the same feeling for fire hydrants or anything that moves. I don't need Luke violating my leg in the future, thanks.
"Why do you like cats more? Is it because your name and 'cat' both start with a 'c'?" He asked. ...I didn't particularly have one. "It's not much of a surprise, though. You look like one." What was that supposed to mean? I look like a cat, or a 'cat person'?
"I just like cats more."
This stopped the conversation for a while. The inn was pretty creepy when it was quiet. The sounds of every single motion within the confines echoes throughout the building. It gives me the chills. Luke was probably contemplating how to respond to that. He was uncharacteristically silent.
"…What about Gill?"
"I don't know. What about him?"
"Do you think he likes cats or dogs more? He seems like a cat person 'cause he's all fancy and stuff. Unless he likes one of those tiny dogs that sound like some type of spicy food. Look like rats, I think so."
"You mean Chihuahuas?"
"Yeah! That's it!" …They don't look like rats. I frowned a little. I had one of those when I was little.
It began to strike me slightly as odd that he was beginning to wonder about peoples' animal preferences. Maybe he was planning something. …Or maybe he wasn't. Maybe he was just being Luke. I should've just went back to the kitchen and pretended I was busy, but I didn't think of it then, much to my dismay.
"Hm… what about Julius?" Luke tapped the side of his head. I tried to stifle a snicker, but it didn't work out to well.
"He probably likes dogs that think they're cats." I nearly burst into laughter after I said this! Luke stared at me blankly. Never before that moment had I realized how creepy his eyes were. He may have well been burning holes through my skin with his retina.
"…I don't get it." …Of course you don't.
"Think, Luke. What does Julius look like? And what's the technical opposite of a dog?"
"He kind of looks like a big, giant piece of multi-colored rainbow candy. Because his hair is like…" -He began to count on his fingers- "…four different colors! And for the opposite of a dog… I think an albino diamond back rattlesnake. "
"You're pathetic."
He seemed sad after that comment and slumped down a little. I mentally gave a sigh of relief, and went back to cleaning the few dishes I had left to clean. When I heard the annoying noise come out of his mouth that shouldn't even be considered a voice, I knew I should've bolted out the door right then and there.
"So… Chase…" His voice was seemingly happier than a few moments ago. A smirk traveled across his face. "What do you like more? Chicken or bananas?" What the-? Can those even be compared fairly? One's a meat (or animal; it really depends if it's dead or not. Unless it's eaten alive. Which, don't get me wrong, I'm all for) and the other's a fruit!
Calmly, I filled up a cup of water from the tap and walked toward the area where Luke sat. I waited a moment, and made sure I had the right opportunity. He didn't expect a thing.
I lifted it up and dumped it on his head.
"Luke, shut the hell up."