I bit down hard on my bottom lip, in a vain attempt to stop it from trembling. I was standing outside the church behind Kim, Bella and some of Emily's old university friends Liz and Tamara, listening intently for the musical intro that was our cue to walk in.

After what felt like a few seconds, I felt a shove from behind. Turning, I noticed that it was from Claire to signal that it was my turn to walk in. I stumbled inside a moment too late and caught up with the others.

Looking up, I felt a stab of pain in my chest; for there, standing at the end of the aisle was Sam. He looked so breathtakingly beautiful I thought that I was going to cry. Luckily though, I regained my senses, and managed to fall into step with Kim.

The church looked amazing, of course: Alice had been put in charge of the decorations, but it was just a bit too fancy and frilly for my liking. I stood and watched with a half-smile as Claire came walking unsteadily down the aisle throwing rose petals, nearly tripping at the end.

And then my smile wiped clean off, because there, wearing an amazing white dress with an angelic smile on the good side of her face walked Emily. Suddenly the bouquet of flowers started trembling violently in my hands. A tear rolled down my cheek. I couldn't tell what I was feeling. Anger, jealousy, hurt, betrayal, but mostly pain.

Pain was ripping right through me- this wasn't the pain of cutting your hand, or breaking a bone, no. This was pain was so much worse, it was agonizing- so intense that it felt like a knife, slicing right through my heart.

That should have been me, walking down that aisle, looking at my future husband, my world who was about to marry me. That should have been me, wearing that white dress, receiving praise and congratulations from my friends and family. That should have been me, staring into the eyes of my one true love.

But all of that wasn't the part that really killed me. The thing that hurt the most was that if life were what it should be, that would have been me. If there had been no werewolves, no vampires, and most of all no imprinting then that would be me.

Sam loved me, there had been no doubt about it, and I loved him too. Life was perfect back then; we had plans to be married. But then it happened. He imprinted. I loved Emily, and I still do, but what I would give if this wasn't her wedding. If she wasn't about to get absolutely everything I wanted from life, instead of me, if it wasn't her world that was about to be complete, I would give anything. I would do anything to take Sam back from her.

Obviously, I had known that they were going to get married- heck, I was the bridesmaid for god's sake, but actually seeing them, being in the church made realisation dawn on me like a slap to the face.

Maybe a small part of me had always hoped that Sam would come back to me. Tell me that it was all some big mix-up, a misunderstanding. But seeing this, hearing this, feeling this made it final. Sam was not mine. And he never would be.

I loved him enough to let him go, to want him to be happy, but it didn't mean that I would be happy. I would have to see him, every day, and know that he was in love with Emily more than he ever loved me.

I looked down at my violently trembling torso, and realised that I would not be in control for much longer, but I wasn't going to ruin this wedding. Dropping my stupid bouquet, I ran out the doors and transformed into wolf mid-stride.

Pain rippled through me, wave after wave, and my step faltered underneath its crushing strength. The trees around me lit up bright green from the light of the sunset. It wasn't pouring down or storming like in the movies whenever somebody's upset: instead, it was a beautiful crisp spring day, blue sky, sun shining bright in the sky without a cloud to be seen.

In a way, it made me feel worse- why couldn't everybody at least one person deal with just a little of my pain? Have just one thing go wrong for them so my life wouldn't seem so crap? I wasn't always such a cold heartless person. I used to be kind and happy and carefree. Those were the good old days. Now I was just the pitiful ex-girlfriend that Sam couldn't get rid of, trying to make everybody else's lives as miserable as hers.

I couldn't deal with this. There was no way that I would be calm enough to phase back, but I would do anything not to have Sam in my head when he transformed. I wanted to have my own thinking space, to be able to sit and wallow in self-pity for just a little bit without having to share my thoughts with the rest of the pack.

I paced for a little while, the sticks and branches of the forest floor pricking the bottom of my paws, before they healed back over again. Then suddenly I had an idea. Could I test just how closely linked our minds were? Would Sam, be able to hear my thoughts in, say, Australia?

Well, I thought to myself, I guess I'm about to find out. Sitting back on my haunches, a wave of agony washed over me at what I was about to do to Seth and Mum and I howled. Then, picking up some spare clothes behind a tree in the forest, I ran in the direction of the nearest airport.

Sam could live his life- I wasn't about to ruin it for him. I just wasn't going to hang around to watch mine go down the toilet. I let my wolf instincts take over as the forest flew behind me into the distance.