~ Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or any other recognizable elements, I barely even own anything X-File-ish.

Spoilers: Nothing really unless you did not know that Scully had cancer.

A/N: I do not know if this is a good story, I just thought it would be amusing. Anyway, it makes a good point: How was Scully able to pay for all her cancer treatments on a Bureau paycheck, or for that matter, how do either of them stay on top of their hospital bills? ~

Cancer sucks, Dana Scully thought as she twisted her key in the lock, swinging her door open and closed again. Her chemotherapy was taking a toll on her expenses, but she had refused to let anyone else pay for them. Her partner, who had offered to take up at least some of her expenses, had been in the hospital himself once in the past month, getting stitches from when a jealous husband had tried to make his pretty-boy face a little less pretty. Just remembering the incident made her tired again. Who could stand all that attention anyway?

It had been a long week and there was nothing she wanted to do more than take a warm bath and fall asleep. She finally stepped away from her door and almost tripped over the pile of letters waiting patiently to be sorted.

Gathering them up, she shuffled through them, laying them in the appropriate stacks: newspapers for her mother's recycling; letters from her brothers Bill and Charlie; a postcard from her aunt; the latest edition of the Lone Gunmen; a thin box from her partner Fox Mulder; and bills. Lots and lots of bills.

Bills can't wait, Scully remembered the last time she'd put off paying her bills…She and Mulder had gotten an assignment that kept them busy for a week, and when she came home, her electricity and water were turned off. And that was the incident with the jealous husband, too.

So, Scully sat at her kitchen table, diligently examining the stack of bills that had been sitting there for a few days. Rent, utilities, medical expenses…for Fox Mulder?

Slightly angry that the Bureau assumed she would pay for her partner's hospitalization, Scully picked up her corded phone and dialed a number long since memorized.

"Mulder."

"Mulder, it's me," she thumbed through the letters from the hospital again, a fresh wave of anger roaring through her as his name stared at her. "Mulder, they sent me your medical bills. Do you know why?"

"Scully." He interrupted her, but she chose to ignore him.

"I mean, isn't it enough that I have my own to pay for? Do you even know how damn expensive chemotherapy is?" She threw his bills down disgustedly. "You do know mine equal more than yours right?"

"Scully, listen to me. I traded bills with you since I knew you wouldn't outright let me handle yours. But, if it makes you happy, I can pay for most of both of them this month."

"Mulder?" She was speechless. She should have been angry. After all, he'd gone over her head and behind her back without informing her about his intentions. Somehow, all she could see was him laying on his couch, hair falling in his eyes, looking guilty and vulnerable, the way he did every time she caught him trying to do something nice for her.

"Come over," she whispered. "Come over now, so I can kick your butt."

~ The End ~