AN- Hey guys! I hope you all had a wonderful holiday season and such… Thanks to everyone who reviewed, you rock my socks all the way to Madagascar.

Last Time…

I smirked as I left Alice's room three hours later, hungry, tired and ready for my revenge.

Chapter Nine

After about 3 hours of Edward's little 'punishment' I was sure he was going to go insane. Not only did I refuse to converse with Edward in any way, but I also refused to be in the same room with him. This put a little damper on the plan he had cooked up. He must have been really focused because he made the biggest mistake you can ever commit while seeking revenge around Alice, he actually planned things out. So, of course Alice saw his plans to dazzle me into talking to him, and prevented it from ever happening. I have to admit, having a psychic on my side was pretty convenient.

Emmet decided he wanted to be in charge of "Bella Bodyguard" duty. So basically whenever Edward got anywhere near me, he 'forcibly' removed him from the room. One time, Emmet got a little too excited while performing his duties and accidentally threw Edward into Esme's favorite vase. While he was cleaning it up, Edward took advantage of his distraction.

Edward scooped me up into his arms and started running up to his room. Luckily, Alice had seen his decision to kidnap me and sent Jasper to save me. Thus beginning a very confusing game of "Capture the Bella".

It seemed that the whole family had taken bets and chosen sides as to who would be the first to give up in our little war going on. The losers had to eat a whole weeks worth of cafeteria food at lunch, so they definitely didn't want to lose.

After Jasper stole me from Edward, Rose grabbed me right out of his arms and ran into her closet.

"It's reinforced with a special type of metal, so it's practically vampire-proof" She said, grinning.

"Why?" I asked.

"Edward has gotten into the habit of burning closets as a form of revenge" Rosalie said.

"Wait, whose team are you on?" I asked. All that running had rattled my brain a little.

"Edward's" She said, bluntly. "No offense, but he's had roughly 80 more years to practice being patient"

"None taken," I said "Although you might want to rethink your decision"

"Why" She inquired. "If a vampire can't get in here, then there's no way in hell you'll be able to get out"

"Oh, don't be so sure of yourself" I said grinning.

"Why?!" She asked again, frustrated.

"Because you gave me a key to your closet, dip-shit" Alice said from the open doorway as she whisked me out of the closet, grabbing Rose's key on the way and slamming the door shut, efficiently locking Rose in her own closet.

"Dammit Alice!" Rose screeched, "Let me out!"

"Not until you've learned your lesson" She replied.

"Enlighten me, 'all knowing short one'," Rose said "What lesson am I supposed to be learning?"

Alice turned to me and winked as she retorted, "Never bet against Alice"

"OK Bella," Alice said as she ran me down the stairs and out of the house, "We're having a team meeting."

"Where?" I asked.

"Here" She said as she came to a halt in front of a huge tree house. Actually, no, it wasn't a tree house. It was a frickin' mansion in the sky

"How in the hell did you find this place?" I asked.

"She didn't," Emmet said as he took me from Alice and jumped up into the 'tree mansion', "I made it!"

"You have way too much spare time on your hands, Emmet" I said as I looked around the heated room. Yes, that's right… HEATED!

"Well what else was I supposed to do? Rosie banned me from sex and-"

"Woah! Way too much information there Emmet" I yelled.

"Ok people!" Alice said, "We're getting off track here! We need a plan!"

"Yes you most certainly do" Edward said from the entrance as he ran in, grabbed me and ran out.

"Aww CRAP!" I heard Emmet yell as we sped away.

"Sorry Bella, but I have to do this, or else you might tell them where our secret lair is" Edward said as he tied a blindfold around my face, blocking out my vision

After about five minutes of running, I felt Edward stop and I heard a door open. The blindfold was taken off and I saw that I was in a room with Carlisle, Rose, Esme, and Edward.

"Ahh, so you got out, Rose" I smirked.

"That was pretty smart, Bella" Carlisle said.

"Well what do we do now?" Esme asked.

"Now, we wait" Edward answered.

I yawned and sat down on the couch that was in the room. I was getting tired after all of this excitement and I figured a ten minute catnap couldn't hurt. I moved myself into a laying position and drifted off to sleep.

When I woke up, I was in my room at the Cullen's house and it was dark. I sat up, confused and nearly fell out of my bed when I realized that Alice was just sitting on the edge of my bed staring at me.

"Did you know you talk in your sleep?" Alice said with a grin.

"Oh no!" I moaned, mortified, "What did I say?" I demanded.

"I'm not telling!" She replied, smirking.

"What happened last night?" I asked

"Oh, well about two hours after you fell asleep, Edward called off our game because he said you deserved to sleep in a bed, not on a crappy couch"

"That was sweet of him" I said smiling. "Maybe we shouldn't do that second prank"

"Bella!" Alice screeched.

"What?? I said, "He-"

"Get a grip WOMAN!" Alice yelled as she shook me. "This isn't just about you and your 'lovers spat' anymore! THERE IS NO DAMN CHANCE IN HELL I AM GOING TO EAT THAT NASTY SHIT THEY CALL FOOD IN THE CAFETERIA!!"

"Okay, Alice, I'll do it." I said.

The next day, I started my period and our plan was set in motion. I had 'made up' with Edward and he thought that I was finished with my revenge. Little did he know…

"Bella, are you hungry?" Edward asked.

"NO EDWARD! Why are you ALWAYS asking me if I'm hungry?!?" I yelled.

"Well no, I just-" Edward stuttered.

"You just WHAT, Edward? You just thought I was FAT?" I screamed.

"God Edward, what the hell is wrong with you?" Alice asked as she turned her back to Edward and winked at me.

"Wha-" Edward started, but Alice cut him off again.

"Just shut the hell up Edward! Can't you see that Bella is in a very sensitive state right now!"

"I don't understand" Edward groaned, frustrated.

"I'm on my period numb-nuts!" I yelled

Edward just stared at me.

"Bella's on her what??!!" Emmet yelled from upstairs.

"Her period!" Alice screeched.

I chanced a glance over at Edward and he the look on his face was so funny that I had to cover up my giggle with a sob.

"Why don't you ever understand me?!" I screamed as I fake cried.

"Ummm…" Edward began.

"See! You don't even know what to say!" Alice yelled.

"Well, I'm not a woman, I don't really know what to say…" Edward said.

"Edward!!!!" I screamed, abruptly turning 'angry' again. "Here I am, in the darkest part of my month so far and you're making jokes!"

"But Bella-"

"No!" I screeched, "Don't 'But Bella' me!" You don't know me! You don't know what I've been through!"

"Uhh-" Edward stuttered

"What did I do to deserve this?!" I yelled "Are you jealous that I'm spending more time with Alice??!!"

"No, of course not!" Edward said, cringing and waiting for me to start yelling again.

Finally, I couldn't take it anymore and neither could Alice. We both collapsed on the floor, laughing.

"HA! Edward. Payback is a BITCH!" I yelled.

"I cannot believe I fell for that." Edward groaned.

"What the hell was that Bella?" Emmet asked as he entered the kitchen.

I couldn't respond because I was laughing so hard.

"Hmph! Well If you won't tell me, Alice will!" Emmet pouted.

But Alice couldn't answer him either, because she was laughing just as much as I was.

Finally Emmet gave up.

"Girls are so confusing" He mumbled as he left the kitchen.

AN- Well, I hoped you liked that… it was fun to write. Poor Emmet. Please review, it makes me want to update faster…

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