Chuck vs the Then and Now

Synopsis: One-shots involving events that happened before and after Chuck lost his memories. Chuck/Sarah.

If you've never read any of my stories, that's okay. This isn't intended as a serial although reading missing years//long days and nights would help. I don't have a specific timeline in mind. Anything in the past involves the five years Chuck erased and anything in the future is afterwards.

Disclaimer: i don't own chuck and that makes me sad.

A/N: I was working on long days and nights when this idea came to me and nagged and nagged and nagged until i finally wrote it down. I've never written something like this before so i hope it doesn't suck. I really wanted to write about the missing five years (the "then") and also future stuff (the "now") but i wanted to try it as a composite. That said, i'm probably going to confuse you. if it's hard to read, try reading just the italics first and then going through the normal type. If it's still hard to read, then it's not you, it's my story. i apologize.


1. Chuck vs the appointment

Sarah glances at the clock by chance. Ten twenty it reads in bold red. She was late; so beyond late she couldn't even blame it on traffic or forgetting to set her alarm. She was so late it could only be purposeful.

Thinking about the evening before, Sarah was tempted to call in a personal day. Even now the memory of their conversation left a bitter taste in her mouth. But if she chose to take the cowardly way out of this, to hide in her shell or under the covers until this blew over, he would know he'd gotten to her.

And she couldn't let that happen. Couldn't, because Sarah Walker didn't have feelings, didn't get compromised, didn't throw away her career for a concept as fickle as love.

Because wasn't that what this was really about? Not the covers, the lies, the slow hours of being defined as something together or the seconds before death and a confession. Stripped of all excuses, she knew this was not about the job; it was about her and him. It was that simple.

Simple enough to complicate everything in her life.


The phone sounded, loud and quarrelsome, breaking Sarah from her sleep as easily as a stone through a windowpane. She groaned, buried herself deeper under the sheets, and wondered why she had so stubbornly insisted on using such an annoying ringtone.

Reaching blindly from the sheets, her fingers marched across the wood polish of the nightstand until she found what she was looking for. Without having to sneak a peek at the caller ID, she knew it could only be one person.

"This better be good, I was just about to go for a cruise down the French Riviera."

His laugh was warm. "Do you have any idea what time it is?"

"Too early for you to call," she mumbled. "This was supposed to be my personal day."

"And you're going to waste it in bed?"

"It's my prerogative," she retorted, rubbing her sleepy eyes. She put her hand over the speaker as she yawned lazily.

"It's ten twenty."

Sarah ignored him. "That's nice. Aren't you supposed to be working?"

"Aren't you supposed to be at your appointment?"

Sarah suddenly tosses the sheets to the side. "What appointment?" she demands, sitting up in bed. She tries to jog her memory but her mind is still thick with sleep.

He laughs again.

"Chuck Bartowski, this is not funny!"

"Uh, your doctor's appointment? It's at eleven isn't it?"

Right. Sarah rolls her eyes. She couldn't believe she'd forgotten. "How did you remember?" she asks, hopping out of bed. The cold hardwood floor sucks all the heat from the soles of her feet and she hisses in surprise.

Her senses return to her quickly now, and she's nearly a hundred percent certain she never told Chuck about it.

"I got a call from their office asking to confirm."

Sarah's face flushes with frustration. "Why would they call you about my appointment?"

She realizes her tone is all wrong when Chuck pauses.

"Maybe because you didn't pick up?" he offers, his voice full of hesitation.

"I never gave them your number." Cradling the phone between her ear and shoulder, she rummages through her closet for the most appropriate outfit. She still can't believe she'd forgotten the appointment. "How would they even know to call you?"

Sarah thinks she hears him smile on the other end. "Sarah...relax," he says. "Not everyone's a spy, okay?"

She rolls her eyes as she lays a selection of blouses over the unmade bed. "Easy for you to say," she grumbles.

"Besides, Ellie referred you there so she must have her contact information. It couldn't have been too hard to get her brother's office number. I am listed in the phonebook you know."

Sarah doesn't want to argue with his reasoning. It sounds right, but her spy senses are still tingling.

"Hey, Sarah, have I ever met Dr. Becksford before?"

Now it was her turn to smile. "Not unless you've been to see an OB/GYN."

Chuck wasn't laughing though. "I don't know, her voice sounded really familiar." He groans. "I wish I could remember." Sarah sits back down on the bed and they fall into a quiet lull.

She knows how frustrating it can still be. "I'm sorry, Chuck, but I'm pretty sure she's not someone you've met."

"Okay. Well I tried." His voice lightens as he changes the subject. "She sounds nice, very nice in fact. I think you'll like her a lot."

Sarah wrinkles her brows. Chuck didn't read people very well and nice usually translated to something more sinister. For her own sake, she hoped he was right this time.

"Do you want me to go with you?"

Sarah flinches at the offer. "That's sweet, Chuck," she starts to say, and can't help the blush that's creeping up to her cheeks. "But it's just a routine check-up."

"Well, even so—"

"No, Chuck." She cuts him off before he can somehow twist her arm and convince her otherwise. She doesn't want Chuck to be there. She wants to do this alone.

"Everything's okay, right?"

Sarah doesn't know. "Yeah, everything's okay." It's a habit, this covering up and telling of white lies, and he can tell. "It's a routine checkup," she repeats.

"If something's wrong, you'd tell me, right?"

"Chuck," she whispers in frustration when she hears the concern in his voice. "Of course. Nothing is wrong with me."

She senses his next question before he can even say it. "I'm not pregnant." That, she was sure of.

"I didn't say anything," he answers innocently.

"I'm sure." Sarah feels like she can finally smile. "I'd be offended if you did."

He chuckles softly on the other end. "Well, my job here is done. Don't miss your appointment."

Sarah smiles. She doesn't want the conversation to end so she hopes he will end it instead. "I'm going to be late because of you."

"Not as late as you would have been," he retorts. "I'm a very busy man, Mrs. Bartowski, you are taking valuable hours from my work."

Sarah laughs and nearly threatens to hang up on him but the fact he's called is so endearing she can't bear to, not even as a joke.

"I love you, Chuck." She says nothing about goodbye and neither does he.

"I love you too." As Sarah hears the phone click, she thinks it's the best ending anyone could ask for.


Casey was at the table, his back to her, when Sarah finally showed at Castle.

"Morning," she grumbled, because at quarter to twelve, it was still technically.

The burly man gave a noncommittal grunt, then swiveled in his chair to face her. "What's the matter, Walker, dumped again?" he asked, just a hint of a smile on his face. "I thought you'd be used to it by now."

Sarah clenched her jaw, not falling for the bait no matter how tempted she was. She would remember this moment though, and the next time Casey deserved a good punch in the face, she'd remember not to hold back.

She let the anger subside and gave a shrug. "Well thankfully this time it will be the last." She tried to smile, to match even a fraction of Casey's smugness, but it hurt too much. "Guess you'll have to find some other way to amuse yourself."

Her words took the man off guard, and she thought she saw a flicker of...what was it? Surprise? Regret? Sarah didn't linger long enough to decipher it. She stalked off to clean her weapons, surrounding herself with things equally cold and unfeeling.

.

It was her fault. Chuck had made his feelings clear from the start. She hadn't expected a man so soft-spoken and timid to just lay his heart out. Hurting him once wasn't enough though; he dared her to do it again and again.

And she had, over and over, until it wore her down. Until she finally saw a challenge she had no way of winning.

"We need to break up, Sarah," he says. Words so familiar to her ears. Sarah has seen this one coming for awhile now, has prepared herself for the inevitable speech. "I just can't keep doing this."

"I know. I can't either," she confesses, the truth. She looks into his eyes and sees the sadness that mirrors her own thoughts exactly. He doesn't want this and neither does she. "Chuck, your sister's going to suspect something if we keep this up."

She knows she's said the wrong thing when he takes a step back.

"This has nothing to do with Ellie," he says, the sadness in his eyes ebbing away. What replaces it is something more bearable. Anger and resentment she can handle. "This is about you and me."

Sarah wishes she could see the light in his eyes. "Chuck, if we break up this time, we can't get back together." It's an empty threat. "That's it. We can't keep getting back together every other week."

He had pushed her into a corner and she was only pushing back. Forcing him to make a decision for once instead of always leaving it up to her.

She didn't think he would call her bluff. Didn't think he would really let her go.

"Okay."

"What?" She doesn't think she hears him correctly.

Chuck offers no explanation. "Okay," he repeats, and takes another step back. He shoves his hands into his jacket pocket and doesn't say anything else.

That's it.

Sarah feels like a knife's just pierced the air between them, severing them forever. It's so unfair, that he can just display his emotions for the world to see while she has to keep hers locked in.

Because Sarah Walker isn't supposed to have feelings.

"Okay..." she says slowly, following through with her own plan.

Chuck takes another step back, drifting further and further away from her. "Good night, Sarah." With a tone like that, he might as well have said goodbye.

The implications don't hit Sarah until she's reached her hotel room. Not the reprimand she's going to receive from her superiors or the snide remarks from Casey, but what this means for her.

It doesn't feel half as liberating as she thought it would. It's what she's wanted him to do since the very beginning, but not really.

Not if she was being honest with herself. Because as selfless as she's been for her country, she still harbours selfish thoughts, including the one where she lives the lie forever.



Sarah gets into the clinic at quarter to twelve. She's embarrassed that she's late, so beyond late, but the receptionist smiles warmly at her and offers to squeeze her in.

"No, I couldn't do that," she says, but the woman insists.

"Dr. Becksford's been looking forward to seeing you. I'm sure she won't mind taking you in during the lunch break."

Sarah declines again but the woman is so persistent that she finally acquiesces to avoid causing a scene. As she sits down in the waiting room, she realizes that Chuck might be right. This doctor was ridiculously nice.


Chuck visits Castle on his lunch break. She hears his shoes clang down the metal steps and the one-sided conversation he holds with Casey, punctuated occasionally by the latter's telltale grunts.

Despite all her apprehension and fear, Sarah steps out of the safety of her locked room.

She meets him half-way, and it feels so awkward and wrong. Suddenly there are long silent pauses and all the spark has been hollowed out of their conversation. They don't talk about what happened last night, but they don't have to. It's like ignoring the elephant in the room, every word, look and sigh is a reference to it.

"So...the hospital function is tonight," he reminds, and Sarah's eyes widen. She had completely forgotten. "Ellie will understand if you don't want to go..."

Sarah tries not to show how much it hurts; that he's already assumed she would cancel.

"I mean, I told Ellie that we were still friends, so you're free to come if you—"

"Yes," she says, before he can take the offer away a second time. She says it without even realizing what she's agreed to. Before she even realizes how illogical it was for her—the ex-girlfriend, to be there.

Chuck's eyes bulge and he swallows the rest of his words. "Really? Oh, okay," he says, shoving his hands into his pant pockets. "Uh...you really don't have to."

"I want to," she says, resolute in her decision. "Besides, it's my job to protect you." It's the wrong words again, and she sees Chuck's eyes darken in frustration.

"It's a charity function," he informs tersely. "Organized by doctors...for sick children." He nearly rolls his eyes at her. "I highly doubt there will be an arsonist or weapons dealer there."

Sarah means to say sorry but what she says instead is, "You never know."



Sarah takes back the sentiment within seconds of entering the examination room.

"Dr. Becksford," she greets with a forced smile. "How nice to see you again."

It was amazing what medical advancements sprang from the fountain of youth. The woman still looked the same after all these years. Younger, even. It made Sarah suddenly self-aware of her own age.

The doctor beamed at her as she closed the door. "Miss Walker, it's such a surprise."

Sarah smiled while gritting her teeth. Somehow I doubt that.

"Bartowski," she clips, and refuses to sit in the offered seat.

"I beg your pardon?" The doctor flips open her chart and suddenly Sarah's filled with an urgent desire to snatch the papers out of her hand. All her life she had been a private person and to think this undeserving woman had unrestricted access to her past.

"It's Sarah Bartowski," she corrects. "You remember my husband, don't you?"

Of course she did. And of course she would call his office feigning all sweet and innocent. Sarah had nearly forgotten about Stephanie Walters—Becksford now, but the memory of their first encounter was still permanently ingrained in her memory.

The woman closes the chart and leans against her desk. "Oh!" she gasps. "I had no idea!"

Despite all these years of practice, her powers of deception were still subpar at best.

"Well, now you do." Sarah flexed her knuckles, the diamond of her ring purposefully reflecting off the light fixture. "I apologize but I really must be going."


Sarah's a fish out of water at the function. She's appropriately dressed, her hair is neatly done and on the outside she wears the veneer of high society as well as the person next to her. But on the inside she's suffocating on the air that once sustained her. She doesn't know any of these people, doesn't know what to say; doesn't know what she's going to do when she sees him.

Sarah bumps into Ellie first, both a blessing and a curse. Once their eyes meet, she can't escape and they share an awkward initial exchange.

"I'm glad you came," the brunette finally says, when all has been said about the frivolous things like dress and hair.

Sarah smiles and takes a long sip from her champagne flute. "I'm glad too," she says, the only thing she can say.

Ellie's smile is forced. Finally it collapses and she reaches out to her. "Sarah, I'm sorry things didn't work out with my brother." Ellie's kindness startles her. It's so much more than she expects, so much more than she deserves.

"It was a mutual decision," Sarah lies. She knows she can only blame herself. "We've both known that it wasn't working out for a long time now." This time it's something closer to the truth.

"Well, I'm glad you and him are still friends." Ellie squeezes her hand and Sarah wonders how she can, when she is the one who's broken her brother's heart. "And I just want you to know that while I love my brother very much, I still think of you as a sister and a friend."

Sarah wants to drown herself in the champagne rather than some sobering tears. She keeps her composure and smiles at Ellie.

"You're so sweet," she says softly."That means a lot. Really."

Ellie smiles back, sad but genuine.

"Have you seen Chuck?"

Ellie glances around the room, then finally points. Sarah follows the invisible trajectory path of her finger and discovers with a sinking sensation that he's engaged in conversation with another woman.

Ellie puts on a brave smile and puts an end to her misery. "Her name is Stephanie Walters. We did our residency together. She's a department head now down at Cedars-Sinai."

Sarah nods. She steals a glance at the elder Bartowski and knows, however hard she tries to hide it, that she approves of the match. Medical school, department head, charity fundraiser...the other woman has Sarah beat on paper alone.

"Well I should mingle," Sarah says. It's a poor excuse and Ellie knows it, knows that she's a stranger to the upper crust of society. But the woman lets her go, spares her from having to explain herself, and Sarah walks through the crowd until she's surrounded, until she feels like she's been swallowed whole.



"No, wait!" The woman rushed in front of her, blocking her way. "We're all friends here."

Sarah cocked her head to the side. "How do you figure?"

"Well Ellie is one of my best friends and you are legally her sister-in-law." Sarah feigns a smile. So kind of the woman to emphasize the obligatory bond rather than anything deeper. "I am one of the very best. I only want to help."

"I'm sorry, but I don't want to mix business with my personal life. You understand right?"

But before Sarah could brush past her, the woman has her chart open.

"It says here you're having difficulty conceiving..."

The words trigger something awful in Sarah. All the hairs on the back of her neck bristle and she tears the metal clipboard out of the woman's hands. "I never said that," she growled.

The fair-haired woman looks up at her in surprise, then smiles benignly. "No, of course you didn't," she demurs. Carefully, she pries the clipboard back out of Sarah's claws. "But it's an assumption one would make if you're childless."

Sarah feels her blood boil. Thankfully for the doctor, she knew how to find her calm center.

"No, I am simply here because I wanted to know if I would be able to conceive."

The woman cocked her head to the side. "Well, why would you think you couldn't?"

Sarah grits her teeth. It was a mistake to come. It was a mistake to even wonder.

"That's none of your business," she growls.

The doctor smiles at her and this time she looks genuinely pleased with herself. "You have nothing to be ashamed of. Infertility is quite common amongst older women."

Sarah took a deep breath. Her hands were shaking, a warning sign. "Like I said, it was a mistake to come here. I'm sorry I've taken up so much of your time."

"I won't tell Ellie if that's what you're afraid of. Or your husband." She winked at her. "Patient confidentiality. I swear."

Not even if you were the last doctor in L.A..

"I'm sorry but I've changed my mind."

The doctor seemed pleased with the announcement. "About having children?"

Sarah narrowed her eyes. "No, I think I'll give it a shot. I just don't think I'll be needing your help for any of that." She handed the woman's acrid smile right back at her. "It was nice meeting you, Dr. Becksford, but I don't think I'll be returning."


Sarah knew her skills would come in handy one day. Not so she could disarm a bomb with a paperclip or get herself out of jail with the sharpened end of a toothbrush, but so she could figure out this Stephanie Walters and the threat she posed.

To the Intersect and to national security, it was minimal.

But to her, God...this was really it.

Stephanie Walters was like a blond and blue-eyed doll. She wore a dress that hugged all the right curves, likely earned with religious hours at the gym, and she knew how to sell it. Even in relaxed conversation she stood as if posing for a photo op. She was beautiful and well aware; a woman who knew what she wanted. All eyes were on her, but she only had eyes for Chuck Bartowski.

And why not? Chuck looked so good in his suit, the irony of which was not lost on Sarah. Hadn't she been the one who taught him? Who'd walked him through countless consulate balls, private dinner parties, and VIP engagements to make him what he was now?

As she saw the woman lean in closer to Chuck, the realization dawned on her.

She was the one.

Her career was no less grand, her beauty no less alluring, and her charm no less effective. And she was normal. The normal version of Sarah.

Finally a woman worthy of Chuck. Someone unbroken, unused and still in its original packaging. Someone who didn't hide secrets, who didn't have to lie, and who would never have to leave for an undisclosed location at a moment's notice.

She tried to read their conversation, but her eyes were smarting.

How pathetic would it be if you really cried here?

The thought was sobering enough for her to stop. She finished the flute of champagne and left to grab another.



Sarah walks past the glass doors and up to the receptionist's desk. The girl, a fresh-faced college grad, sits up extra straight in her chair when she sees her approach.

"Oh hi, , how are you today?"

Sarah smiles. She never thought she'd actually enjoy hearing the matronly title but she likes it more than she's ever liked being called Miss Walker.

"Just fine, Marie. Will you let my husband know I'm here?"

"Actually he's already called to say that he's expecting you. I believe he's in his office." The young girl grinned. "It's so sweet."

Sarah doesn't know why but the comment makes her blush. "What is?"

The girl shrugs. "That you guys still have lunch together everyday. Mr. Grimes filled me in on the two of you, I hope you don't mind. It's so romantic."

A part of her wonders exactly what his friend has said and the other wonders how much of it was true. Morgan had a tendency to embellish details and run away with ideas, a useful trait for product pitching but little else.

"Well what can I say? I'm very lucky."


By the time she returned, they were gone.

Sarah stood in confusion, wondering if it would also be pathetic for her to stalk them. But she soon realized she didn't need to.

"Hi."

Sarah turns around, color rushing to her cheeks as she's face-to-face with her adversary.

"Hi."

Sarah takes the extended hand and manages to shake it gently without crushing any fingers.

"I saw you talking to Ellie back there, are you friends?" Sarah nods slowly. The woman smiles but it's tight lipped. "And here I thought I knew all of Ellie's friends."

If Sarah didn't know better, she had just been dealt an accusation.

"Yeah, well I'm more acquainted with her brother."

To this, the woman's brows rise with interest. "Charlie?" she says with a genuine smile now. "How do you know Charlie?"

"Chuck, actually," Sarah corrects. She doesn't know why, but she hates that the woman has a separate name for him. "We—" Sarah realizes too late that she's fallen into the woman's trap. She knew exactly who she was; she just wanted to hear her say it. "Used to date..." her voice trails off and she lowers her eyes. She hates herself for being so easily played.

"Oh!" The woman's eyes widen but it looks feigned. "That's too bad."

Sarah wrinkles her brows. "I beg your pardon?"

The woman doesn't back down. "I said that's a shame. He seems like a real keeper." She gives a shrug of her shoulders, as if to say, 'your loss is my gain' and suddenly Sarah wishes she didn't have a conscience.

She wishes she could throw away the job, risk the lives of millions, and finally tell him how she feels and bask in the light for all of ten seconds before the world came crashing down on them.

She wishes she could punch this woman and break her cosmetically enhanced nose. Just cause. And she knows she's compromised, because even Agent Walker isn't that petty.

"Are you a doctor too, Miss—"

"Walker," Sarah replies tersely. How awful, they even share the same initials. "And no, I'm not."

Before she's forced to reveal her cover job, Chuck appears with two flutes of bubbling champagne. They're both taken aback to bump into each other like this, but he recovers first.

For a second, he nearly forgets and offers one of the glasses to her but the woman intervenes.

"Thank you, Charlie," she says coquettishly, taking it out of his hand. Chuck's eyes dim, as if he's suddenly reminded of their status or lack thereof, and he steps back in line with his new acquaintance.

"Charlie, you're right on time. I believe you know Miss Walker." Chuck manages a weak smile and nods his head. Sarah faces the both of them. She wants to down the entire flute of champagne in one go but she's afraid of what Chuck will think.

"Hi, Sarah," he greets. His voice is still warm, and he still calls her by name.

"Miss Walker was just telling me where she worked."

Sarah narrows her eyes; wonders how much Ellie has told her. She takes a deep breath and confesses, keeping the shame from entering her voice.

"A yogurt shop?" The woman's immaculate forehead did little to express her shock and surprise. "You've got to be joking."

Sarah doesn't know what to say. In a room of the well-to-do, it must be quite the sensation. Suddenly she feels like a pauper speaking to a queen.

"No, no she's not," Chuck interrupts. "It's true. She serves frozen yogurt at the plaza." Sarah's heart sinks and she has to clench her jaw to hide the look of hurt from showing on her face. She'd never imagined Chuck would betray her like this—



When Sarah gets off the elevator, Chuck's already waiting in the hallway.

"Hey!" he exclaims and pulls her into a long, drawn-out kiss. There's cheering and hollering in the background but somehow the prude in Chuck manages to ignore it.

When they finally pull away, all she can say is, "Wow."

Chuck finally blushes and ducks his head to hide from his employees and their cries of encouragement. Sarah ignores them but even she finds it hard to hide the color that's rising to her cheeks.

"What's gotten into you, Chuck?"

He shrugged sheepishly. "I just missed you," he said, and with one boyishly charming smile, she was sold.

.

Lunch is Chicken Caesar salad and soda.

"Wow, Large-Mart fare. Honey, you spoil me," he teased as he pushed the stack of papers off his desk. Sarah narrows her eyes and wields a plastic knife in warning.

"We're experiencing an economic downturn at the bank. Money's tight." She grinned as she poured the dressing over her salad. "Besides, where else can you find lunch for under five bucks?"

Chuck wrinkled his brows as he did the same. "Right..." he said with a waggle of his brows. "Sarah, you used to tell me how this was going to give us cancer. What is this really about?"

Sarah cocked her head to the side. Had she really said that?

"I was just feeling nostalgic," she said. "If you don't want it, then don't eat it." As if to show that she was serious, she reached over to take it off his hands.

"No! I love Large-Mart!" he cried and swatted her hand away. "Just don't tell Morgan I said that," he added in a conspirative whisper.

Sarah giggled. "You're secret is safe with me."

Chuck smiled back at her. His hand reached across the table and clasped hers. "So how was your appointment?"

Just thinking about the incident left a bitter taste in her mouth. "Fine," she quipped and stuffed her face with lettuce.

"You got back from the doctor's pretty fast." As if to answer her accusing stare, he explained. "Dr. Becksford called when it was almost twelve. Said you still weren't there. She called back fifteen minutes later to assure me that you had showed and that you were done."

Sarah drops her utensils and her hands retreat to her lap. Chuck's arm rests extended across the table, waiting for her to return.

"She called?"

Sarah takes a deep breath, panic and fear rising like a tidal wave threatening to crash over her. What would he think if he knew?

"Yeah. She seems really nice. Really engaged with her patients and their family."

Sarah feigns a smile. God she really hated that woman.

Chuck plays around with his food, but his eyes are fixed on her. "Honey...is everything alright?"

"Yeah." Sarah realizes she has to try harder if she's going to sell it. "Chuck!" she admonishes mildly. "It was just a routine check-up."

"That lasted only five minutes? That doesn't sound very thorough to me. Dr. Becksford wants you to return for a follow-up."

"No." No chance in Hell.

"Sarah, I just think—"

"I'm fine!" She doesn't mean to raise her voice and she instantly regrets it when she sees Chuck pick up his utensils in defeat.

"Okay, I'm sorry," he mumbles. "I was just worried..."

Sarah's shoulders sag and she sinks in her seat, beaten at this match of wills. When she looks at his downcast eyes, she knows he won't be letting this go anytime soon.

"I wanted them to run some tests on me," she finally confesses. "To see if I would be able to..." She lets her voice trail off but when she looks up, she realizes she has Chuck's complete attention. "Conceive."

There. The 'C' word.

Chuck's mouth forms a big 'O' and he sets down his fork.

"Not that I've really thought about it!" she said quickly to cover her tracks. "I just thought it would be good to know, just in case we ever did want to have children." When Chuck is still silent, she begins to panic. "Not to say I want children...or that I don't. I just thought I should know...being that I've never really thought about it and knowing all those years in the agency..." She gives an exasperated sigh. "Chuck! Say something!"

But Chuck just stares at her and smiles. "That's very sweet of you."

"What?"

"I think that's very sweet of you," he says with a wide smile. "And if you had told me earlier, I wouldn't have been so worried."

Sarah can't believe that's all he has to say on the subject. But then again she realizes she's talking to the wrong person. If Ellie ever got wind of this it would be another story altogether.

"Why would you be worried? I told you it was just a routine check-up."

Chuck rolls his eyes. "What kind of routine check-up involves a doctor calling three times in one day to confirm your attendance? Sarah, do you have any idea what went through my mind?" He emphasizes the point with his hands, gesturing madly in the air. "And she was so insistent! What the heck was I supposed to think? I don't know! And you got a special referral from Ellie. She was supposed to be the best—"

"Chuck." She grabs his hands and pulls him down to his seat.

"What?" he asks, sounding slightly out of breath.

"You're so sweet."


—but then he smiles at Sarah, the kind of smile she thought she'd never see again, and he declares rather proudly: "I, myself, work at a Nerd Herd station at a Buy-More."

The woman looks horrified. "But you graduated with an engineering degree from Stanford!"

Chuck shrugs. "I know but you just can't compete with Buy-More hours." He winks subtly at Sarah, and she doesn't think she's ever been more in love with him.

"She asked me out over a service-desk," he muses. "Our first date we split lunch at the Large-Mart. Chicken Caesar salads and two sodas for under five bucks."

Sarah can't help but smile. The look on the other woman's face is priceless.

"We took our breaks in the supply closet—"

"But that was when I was working at the Weinerlicious." Sarah's grin matches his. It's become a contest to see who can horrify her more.

"You used to work at a store called the Weinerlicious?" The woman says the name as if it is the most vile thing she'd ever heard of.

"Well, I used to scrub toilets at the pier." Chuck's last comment seemed to do her in. She excuses herself and turns her back to them, determined to get as far away as possible. "Ellie's going to kill me," he murmurs as he watches her go. Then he turns his attention on her.

"That was a lie, by the way. There are some depths I won't sink to." He smiles sheepishly then sticks both hands into his trouser pockets. "Sort of."

"That's okay. I lied too." He looks at her, like he thinks he knows what she really means but he's afraid to believe it. "I didn't mean what I said."

Chuck pulls one hand out of his pocket and reaches out to her. She knows he's nervous when she feels his perspiration slick against her skin but she doesn't mind. It's endearing, really. Like a puppy dog kiss.

"Do you..." He licks his chapped lips, forcing Sarah to wait on bated breath. "Do you want to get back together with me?"

Sarah stares at him. "What?" Even when he repeats it and she's sure it's not just her imagination, she still can't believe it. She almost asks him why he would be willing to take her back when she's still her broken self. Why he hasn't given up yet, why he's such a glutton for punishment.

Doesn't he know she'll only hurt him?

Sarah doesn't trust herself with an answer, so she does the unthinkable and draws him in, kissing him full on the lips as if her life depended on it. Chuck freezes and she remembers too late that he hates PDA, hates attention, but she doesn't care. She's going to do what she wants for once.

They finally break apart to the sound of applause. There's a clearing and the crowd has turned into a circle of spectators. Chuck turns scarlet and Sarah feels the blood rush to her head.

Then she picks Ellie out of the crowd and she feels the blood drain away. She can't read the woman's expression but she knows Ellie isn't pleased.

"We're such a cliché aren't we?" Chuck asks, taking her hand in his.

Sarah is comforted by the security of his grip. She takes hold of Chuck's face and keeps his eyes on her so he won't have to see his sister's disappointment.

"God, I hope so," she says as she pulls him into another long kiss.

Because after all, aren't cliché's about finding the love of your life and living happily-ever-after?


A/N: I hope you liked it. If you didn't, don't worry. i don't think i'll be updating this one a lot since it's not a serial. plus it's really hard to write in two different parts.