October 11.
A body lies cold in the quiet village of Twilight Town: Aerith Gainsborough, age 26, cause of death unknown. She had barely begun to live. I will get to the bottom of this horrific injustice.
Satisfied by the vague-yet-confident tone of his first journal entry, Zexion Drew snapped the tiny book shut and glared suspiciously around at the rest of the mourners. The entire town was present at the memorial service for one Aerith Gainsborough, deceased, which meant almost certainly that the murderer was among them, and on top of that had probably only showed up to get the free jell-o salad, the soulless bastard. Zexion stabbed at his own jell-o salad with his fork, and swallowed a chunk without even bothering to chew. Yes, this would be the first case of Zexion Drew, freelance detective, and then they'd see what he was truly capable of. He'd show them all!
For you see, Zexion Drew was not actually a detective. He was the town's librarian. On top of that, the rest of the townsfolk had decided that reading all of those books was giving him funny ideas. If you asked a random person on the street, say, how about that Mr. Drew, they'd pull you aside so no one would hear and say, oh, he's mad, you know, quite mad. As such, he had never told anyone of his secret ambition: to be a famous investigator. So when he'd heard that a death under mysterious circumstances had occurred in the sleepy town of Twilight, he'd immediately skulked out of his musty lair, pen and paper in hand, prepared to begin collecting evidence. Now he stood in a low-traffic corner of Xaldin Fu's funeral home, taking frantic notes on the relative evidence against each of his fellow Twilight citizens. Since he fancied himself an invisible and objective observer, he chose to ignore the confused glances he was getting from the people at the dessert table.
First his eyes fell on Cloud Strife, the deceased woman's would-be fiancée. He didn't appear to have shed a single tear the entire night- that made him an immediate suspect. Zexion's fanciful mind filled with potential motives- a simple disagreement, plain old wedding cold feet, or something worse? As far as anyone knew, Aerith Gainsborough had no living family, so a familial dispute was out of the question.
Cloud was standing rather close to his good friend, Leon Leonhart, who was using his other arm to comfort his wife of two years, Tifa Lockhart. Leon's unfortunate moniker had come about as a well-intentioned mishap of feminism. Their original names had been Leon Hart and Tifa Leonlock, and they'd been combined when they got married in the least good way possible. Leon absolutely hated when people commented on his name- in fact, it was the only thing that Zexion had ever seen make him angry. Angry enough to kill? He tapped his pen pensively against his lower lip, and made a quick note in his book. He also circled "mishap of feminism."
Next, he observed the younger crowd of Twilight Town, gathered in a corner to avoid the solemnity of the older townsfolk. He began with Xaldin's daughter, Yuffie Fu, heiress to the Fu Funeral Homes fortune. Now, if she'd been murdered, he would have had a motive. He sighed for the lost opportunity. In any case, she and her sort-of friends Hayner Bodeen, Eugene Pence, and Olette Mae Olsen seemed far too young to be murderers, but Zexion couldn't discount manslaughter- an innocent childhood prank gone horribly wrong? Or maybe the Fu family was indebted to the Chinese mafia and needed to drum up business by any means necessary? Ooo, he liked that. He could use that in his novel.
Zexion skipped over Demyx Dolor, the town's young but capable schoolteacher, since he was clearly just too beautiful to be a killer. He could pump Demyx for information all day long. Ahem.
The wealthiest family in town, the Woodses, lived in a rumored-to-be-haunted (but that was another mystery for another day) mansion in a forest a few miles outside of town. Xemnas Woods, the head of household, owned the most lucrative bag-carting business in Twilight Town. His son Roxas Woods and Roxas's wife Naminé Woods, poised to inherit Bag-o-Stuff Incorporated, also lived in the mansion, and the three barely ventured into town. In fact, Zexion was surprised to see them here, at the funeral. Their ethnic manservant, Axel del Fuego, was also present, standing in a corner similar to Zexion's own, carrying Naminé's purse and looking less than comfortable about it. They certainly had the resources and connections to get the job done. The four of them almost never deigned to grace the town with their physical presence- had they come here today to gloat over a job well done?
By contrast, the poorest person in Twilight Town, Luxord, just Luxord, had also shown up, mainly to eat the free food. He lived in the tunnels beneath the railroad tracks and liked to talk to himself, spawning the many rumors that they, too, were haunted. Luxord was notorious for being willing to bet on literally anything, from "what day the baby will come" to "which caterpillar will climb up my leg faster" to "who will have to pee first." Hence, of course, the having no money. Had his abject poverty driven him to desperate measures? Sure, the body didn't look like it had been violently mugged, but there were plenty of ways to kill without leaving marks. Plenty. Zexion had both read and written about them.
Vexen Hicks, the town doctor, was shaking hands with Xemnas Woods. Zexion's eyes narrowed and he began writing more quickly. He had learned to never, ever trust a suck-up. And besides, Vexen had prepared the body for the funeral service and would be performing the autopsy, so he had plenty of opportunities to hide evidence. Zexion drew a star next to his name, and a quick arrow pointing him towards the top of the list. Couldn't be too careful with your records, he always said. He glanced around the room and focused on young Riku Spears, rumored gang member and-
"Zexion? Dude, what the hell are you doing?" Zexion cursed himself at having been so easily foiled by Xigbar Casey, the war-torn, grizzled, actual town sheriff. As if he could ever understand. As if he would ever dedicate himself to law enforcement with the same vim and vigor that Zexion himself had! But all that came out was:
"Eeehm… nothing, sir." Zexion hated his own simpering voice.
"Good. Stay out of trouble." Xigbar left Zexion alone in his corner, but Zexion could see the assistant sheriff, Seifer Almasy, sneering at him from across the noodle casserole. Someone as surly as Xigbar could definitely be a murderer, and he already had built-in accomplice. Xigbar had definitely gotten used to killing in the war, and the whole eye-patch thing definitely made him look like the type to abuse his position to kill people for fun, and Seifer was just a douche. Zexion moved them to the top of the list, too, and planned to make a re-note of them on his list of People Who Have Wronged Me, which unsurprisingly was almost exactly the same as the list he was making right now.
Anyway, to escape the sheriff's watchful eye, Zexion crawled underneath one of the buffet tables and set himself up to peek at everyone's legs through a crack in the plastic tablecloths. With renewed purpose, he focused on Riku Spears's bright blue sneakers, and continued his notes on rumored gang membership. He had no evidence of any gang activity in Twilight Town, but Riku was a big-city outsider, and those types couldn't be trusted, not at all.
Lexaeus Overfoot, a big hulking lump of a man, was the town's mayor, elected mainly because he was the only person in the town with whom no one had had a previous disagreement. Generally, Lexaeus seemed to be more of a gentle giant, soft-spoken and, well, practically not speaking at all, but Zexion could leave no stone unturned in this hunt. The political climate in Twilight Town was fierce- there was always the possibility that Lexaeus had murdered Aerith Gainsborough to stir up controversy and frighten the townspeople into following him blindly during an election season. Politics could be brutal. Deadly, even.
Marluxia McCoy and Larxene Carlyle were a pair of small-scale florists and pig farmers who lived on the outskirts of town. During her tragically too-short life, Aerith Gainsborough had often bought flowers from them, and they were going to be the suppliers for the Strife-Gainsborough wedding. Wait. That would give them a strong incentive not to murder the victim. Well, in any case, no one could be trusted. Besides, they frequently hosted a drifting ex-felon by the name of Saix, just Saix, who was also mysteriously present at the memorial service, probably also for the free food. Maybe Saix had obtained a taste for blood during his years behind bars, and after years of desperate waiting, had finally found a way to sate it here in Twilight Town.
And finally, Sora and Kairi Nichols, a young married couple who seemed just a little too perfect and happy. Happiness like that had no place in Twilight Town, and Zexion flinched away from it like a vampire hiding from sunlight. His detective senses were tingling- they had to be hiding something, something dark and broody.
26 suspects. One hiding a dark and murderous secret. And I, Zexion Drew, detective, will find out the secret. I will stop at nothing- I will hide in the shadows, I will follow every clue, I will seek out information like a dog seeks out dog biscuits. I, Zexion, will solve the mystery of who killed Aerith Gainsborough.
He triumphantly snapped his journal closed and stood up. Unfortunately, he had forgotten that he was hiding underneath a table, and bumped his head rather hard, causing a worried commotion above him. He decided it would be better to wait it out, and stayed in his hiding spot a few more hours, listening frantically for clues.
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