Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy VII, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Sephy: Well, I bugged her all through Astronomy, until she wandered home pretty pissed and had to type this to shut me up.

Ahrk: *grumble* And you just HAD to bug me when I hadn't gotten much sleep, too.

Sephy: Yeeaaahhh. I'm good at that. *wicked grin*

Ahrk: *sighs heavily and faces readers* Yes, this is a Sephiroth fanfic. No, Vincent isn't in this, and Cloud is with Sephiroth-- *gets pelted* AHH HEY! Blame the angel with the killer sword over there!

Sephy: *whistles innocently*

Ahrk: *glares at him before continuing* ANYWAY. This is a little thing that cooked up in my brain for a long time. And I have to give credit where credit is due. There's a very special word in here that made me laugh so hard, and I thank my beloved Vincent(Not FF7) from the bottom of my heart for giving it to me to use as ammunition for Sephiroth.

Sephy: *thumbs up* Thanks man!

Ahrk: Let's just start the story...

A Seven-Letter Word For WHAT?!
Written by Ahrk

FF7, again, is NOT MINE!

.~.

Sephiroth quirked his left eyebrow up in a confused manner. The small book he held in his left hand was folded in half, while his right hand tapped a small, black pen shaped like the Masamune against his knee.

Leaning back on the couch, he groaned and let his head lull back onto the cushion. "Clooouud," he called with a flat, bored tone.

The small exotic blonde from Nibelheim leaned out from the kitchen doorway. "Yes, Sephy-kun?"

The platinum-haired general grinned at the nickname the smaller man gave him. "When is that lunch ever going to be served?"

Cloud huffed, then retreated back into the kitchen. "It would be served faster if some arrogant wise-ass would help me," he yelled.

Sephiroth winced, yet remained playful. "But, but, I have to finish this accursed crossword puzzle. You know how much I can't stand it when I start something and don't finish it." He focused once more on the paperback booklet full of puzzles, half the answers bubbled in on the current one that the book was folded to.

He heard a small chuckle, and a pair of wiry tanned arms encircled his neck in a warm hug. "Hai, I know about your annoyance at not finishing things... that's how you got me." Cloud played with Sephiroth's bangs as he nibbled on his earlobe. The general laughed gently, a beautifully deep laugh filled with warmth, and tried his best to focus on the puzzle again. Which wasn't easy, considering how sexy Cloud was being at the moment. God damn, he was playful!

...Sephiroth suddenly had the greatest idea.

A fun way to play with the lithe blonde, and to get the small rebel into his bed yet again.

The silver-haired man made like he was thinking on the next clue to the crossword, all the while Cloud placing wet, warm kisses down the side of his neck.

"Hmm, Cloud hunny, maybe you could help me with this one..." He resisted the urge to breathe harder. Cloud knew that damned spot on his neck that drove him insane with hunger for the blonde, and he was now exploiting it, licking at it like some damn cat. Pushing his tongue hard enough to seem rough, yet leaving his wet muscle to heat the skin.

"Mmm?" Cloud answered, fully busy.

After a pause to gather his thoughts from the gutter. "What's a seven-letter word for a male's appendage?"

Cloud just about fell off the back of the couch. "W-what?!"

Sephiroth grinned maniacally. Gotcha.

"A seven-letter word for a male's appendage," he restated, resisting the urge to cackle.

Sephiroth could feel the heat radiating from Cloud's cheeks. How cute. He was a sex kitten when he wanted to be, but get him surprised, and he was that blushing virgin again.

"Uhh, uhhm..."

"C'mon, Cloud, you use it every day. Don't tell me you've never heard a name for it before."

Fighting his blush, the blonde glared. "How could I not pick up names for it? It's all the other guys in ShinRa would talk about!"

A loud laugh from the general. "How true. So tell me, what names for this 'male appendage' have you heard? One of them might be the answer to this clue."

Cloud came around the couch, sitting down next to his elder, looking up towards the ceiling while placing his finger on his pouted lower lip. Damn blonde, he knew he was cute. He just knew it. "Let's see..."

"...Cock." "Four letters, keep going."

"...Dick." "Same."

"...Member." "Six, close one."

"..." Cloud blushed furiously. Sephiroth eyed him. "..Well?" He noted a bulge to Cloud's crotch, and inwardly grinned. The blonde was being affected by this little conversation. Perfect.

"I can't, it's too embarrassing..." He fidgeted. This would surely not be the answer. So why should he say it?

"Come, come, tell me. I wish to know..." Sephiroth leaned over, breathing hotly into Cloud's ear as he spoke the words. Licking the smaller man's earlobe, he felt the shiver run through the blonde. Ah, close now...

"...One-eyed Monster."

Sephiroth literally fell to the floor in loud, raucous laughter. Cloud just sat where he was, bright tomato red. Why did he have to say that...?

The platinum-haired man was quickly losing his breath, clutching his sides as he laughed and gasped. Cloud couldn't stand it anymore and sat on top of him, trying to cover his mouth. "Stop laughing! It wasn't my name for it! Blame the soldiers! Stop laughing at me!"

Sephiroth suddenly snatched Cloud's wrists, scaring a loud "Eep!" out of the blonde before quickly rolling over on top of him. He grinned. "I wasn't laughing at you, sweetie. Just imagining how that name could ever be used in love-making."
Cloud stared up at Sephiroth, the blush running rampant on his cheeks still, refusing to go away. He wouldn't dare...

"Or should we try and see if it's possible?"

It was then Cloud realized he had completely fallen into a trap. He growled, as Sephiroth descended onto his ear and clamped it between his lips, pulling gently. Cloud let out a small gasp, and wriggled under the taller man.

"You sonuvabitch, you tricked me! All so you could get into my pants--" Cut off by a kiss, he glared into Sephiroth's eyes, who merely kept a glow of humor and self-pride in his Mako orbs. Pulling Cloud's arms over his head, he held the blonde's wrists together with one hand, while stroking his fingertips down the left arm.

Cloud desperately tried to wriggle his wrists out of Sephiroth's grasp, but the general was far too strong. He felt Sephiroth's hand slowly work its way down his ribcage, pausing to circle his belly button with a finger, before snapping the pants button away.

Sephiroth backed away from Cloud's mouth, smirking. "Let's see what we have in here. What did you call it again?"

Cloud glared absolute fire at the older man's face.

"I call it my 'touch it and dieEEOOOHH!"

Sephiroth smirked. Best way to shut him up.

Cloud writhed as Sephiroth grabbed his cock through his pants, squeezing on and off. He let out a low moan, at first surprised by the touch, but soon eager for it. His growing mewls of pleasure enticed the silver to relinquish and slip his hand into the blonde's boxers. Cloud blushed, not from embarrassment, but pleasure, as he finally stopped struggling to get away, to struggling to get closer to his platinum-haired superior.

Watching Cloud's mouth form 'o's of pleasure, Sephiroth felt himself harden. Gods, this minx of a soldier just didn't realize how much of an effect he had on Sephiroth. He groaned softly, bending to capture those soft lips in a hungry kiss. Cloud licked his tongue against his upper lip, and Sephiroth allowed him to explore inside his mouth. The small, hot tongue played against his own, and they sparred with each other before Sephiroth gave another squeeze to Cloud's crotch and the blonde relented. He pulled back from another kiss, this time diving underneath Cloud's chin to nip and bite at the flesh of his neck.

Cloud groaned, and arched his aching member closer to that strong, squeezing hand. "Please, Seph-kun..."

Sephiroth chuckled against Cloud's neck, working the cock in his hand. Squeezing the very tip, he rubbed his index finger playfully against the slit, earning a shriek of pleasure.

"Sephiroth! Please!"

"Yes, my lovely little rebel?" He paused his hand, moving up to stare into Cloud's, well, clouded blue eyes. Cloud brought his hips up again, but Sephiroth put his palm flat against him and held him down.

Cloud sighed in aggravation. "God damn you..."

A soft chuckle, and the taller man brought his hand up to pull the blonde's shirt up, teasing the young man's nipples. Pinching each softly, he tickled his lips down Cloud's neck and to his right nipple, playing the nub between his teeth. He felt the groan vibrating through Cloud's chest, and continued biting gently but teasingly.

Yet again the blonde arched his hips up, but Sephiroth took this opportunity to slide Cloud's pants off his crotch, and down to his knees. Running his fingers down Cloud's length, he toyed with the nipple in his mouth, before switching to the other one, making it just as hard and wet as its mate.

Cloud writhed from the torture, gasping as the general started licking down his stomach. He would breath out on his skin as he rubbed his tongue, causing a warm trail at first before it grew cold. It felt so good, why did he protest this in the first place? Why was he mad at Sephiroth...?

He couldn't feel the platinum-haired man's mouth on his body anymore, and he faintly lifted his head up to peer down at him. Sephiroth had stopped entirely, even removing his hand from Cloud's throbbing ache to settle it against his hipbone.

Dizzy with pleasure, all Cloud could muster was, "...Wha?"

Sephiroth then gave a cruel smirk. "I want to hear you say it."

"Ehh?" the blonde answered.

"That hilarious name you mentioned to me earlier," Sephiroth quipped.

Cloud's eyebrows furrowed. What had he said? He couldn't remember... Shaking his head, he recalled back to when Sephiroth had asked him the original question. He had ticked off a few names, and then--

"Oh gods no."

Sephiroth grinned widely. "Yes."

With a firm thunk from his head banging the floor, Cloud made a face at the ceiling. "You have more of a possibility of turning into a fatass mog than getting me to use that name," he said flatly.

A firm, hot lick along the tip of his cock made him gasp and shiver. "Is that so?"

"Uhnnnn..." There was no way he was going to say it! But, gods...

Another lick, this time Sephiroth let it linger against the slit at the very tip, tasting Cloud's salty precum. The blonde groaned in denied pleasure, his hips still held down. How he wanted to be in that mouth... God damn Sephiroth...

"..Please..."

"Mm?" Sephiroth peeked up as he swirled his tongue around the head of the rebel's member. Watching Cloud's reactions carefully, he brought his hand up, pressing his arm on Cloud's hip to keep him from lifting them. He placed his hand at the base of the throbbing organ, and proceeded to fist the shaft slowly and gently. Just enough to work Cloud into a frenzy.

"PLEASE DAMNIT!" Trying to writhe once more, he found that his hands were released from above his head. He immediately worked his fingers into Sephiroth's silver locks, gripping the man's skull. Sephiroth's other hand moved to trail soft fingertips along the blonde's chest, stroking down the cold trail that his tongue had traveled earlier.

No matter how much Cloud pushed, Sephiroth's head would not be moved. God damn his strength! Why must he tease me so?

Bringing his mouth over the tip of the cock, Sephiroth closed his lips over it, sucking so gently Cloud could hardly feel it. But he definitely did, and ached all over again to be in that warmth...

Sephiroth yet again pulled away, and looked up. "Are you going to use it? Cause if you aren't, I'll just keep torturing you slowly, never allowing you release. So either you say it, or I leave you hanging. And believe me, I can keep this up for a long time." With the emphasis on that word, Cloud's eyes widened. He wouldn't...! Wait, yes he would. Sephiroth would be that cruel. He sighed pitifully, moving his head to the side so his eyes couldn't be seen.

"..." Sephiroth watched, a victorious smile slowly working its way on his mouth...

"Would you... Please..."

A stiff squeeze to his shaft, and Cloud's head rolled. "Ahnn! Please, please suck my--" He blushed furiously. He was afraid his blood would burst out of his skin at how much he was blushing. But god damn Sephiroth, he moved his head down further and began working his tongue up Cloud's length. Now who was the cat?

With a loud groan, Cloud finally yelled, "Please suck my one-eyed monster!"

.~.

[Authoress pauses to go into bathroom and proceeds to laugh for two hours straight]

.~.

Sephiroth snickered loudly, embarrassing the poor, horny blonde further. But, true to his word, he immediately engulfed Cloud's cock in his mouth, massaging his tongue against the underside of the shaft. Cloud shrieked, rolling his head side to side as he felt Sephiroth's warm mouth contort and suck on his pulsing organ. Oh gods, it felt wonderful! Too wonderful! He wasn't going to last! All that torture had driven him mad...

Cloud gave a mighty lurch, screaming the general's name as he spilled his seed into Sephiroth's mouth. The platinum-haired one swallowed easily, backing up to clean the tip before moving up to snuggle the exhausted ex-SOLDIER.

Cloud sighed happily, curling against the taller man. His breath slowed, and he licked at Sephiroth's cheek, earning a playful kiss that tasted of his cum.

"Now see? That wasn't so bad," Sephiroth whispered teasingly.

Cloud gave a swift smack to his shoulder, finally chuckling. "I must admit, you can get me to do the most embarrassing things."

And he instantly regretted that comment.

"Oh really now?" Sephiroth stood, bending quickly to pick up the blonde and throw him over his shoulder. Cloud squeaked in surprise, and gripped at Sephiroth's back. "What are you doing?!"

"I'm gonna make sure that comment remains true, what else?"

Squirming wildly, Cloud could only wail in helplessness as Sephiroth carried him briskly into the bedroom and locked the door.

.~.

(Several long hours later...)

.~.

"Sephy-kun?" The blonde yawned, totally drained.

"Yes, little one?"

"...What was the original word?"

Sephiroth blinked hazily over at Cloud. "What?"

The blonde turned his head, smiling at him. "You don't remember? That seven-letter word for a male's appendage?"

Sephiroth opened his mouth in an 'ahh' of remembrance, and promptly laughed.

"You wouldn't have guessed it anyway," he assured.

"C'mon, tell me!"

"Alright alright... it was 'phallus'." The older man chuckled.

Cloud blinked. Then closed his eyes, sighing deeply.

"You're right. I never would have guessed that."

.~.

End!!

Ahrk: *still laughing* Gods, I didn't realize how funny this was gonna turn out to be! Hope you enjoyed it!

Sephy: *big grin* I certainly did.