Author's Notes: This is just a series of one-shots from Sasuke's point-of-view, and have taken places before, during, or after the events in Purple. If you haven't read Purple yet, it might be confusing, but I suppose that they can stand alone. These are just pieces I felt like writing in Sasuke's P.O.V., so they can either be very short, long, unfinished... plot without plot? If there's any that exceed the R rating, I'll post a link to them in my profile.

This story takes place six years after Purple left off.

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"What you see is what you get (don't you know). Fishing for the answer with a line and sinker. Look at me and don't forget (don't you know). Hard to get a grip with all these broken fingers."

-Line and Sinker, by Billy Talent

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Patter patter patter

…plink

Sasuke winced, debating momentarily whether it was worth the effort to get up and put a pot under the leak he knew the plumber hadn't fixed. He knew that a storm was imminent from the moment he'd looked over his morning cup of coffee and into the world outside his window, the skies heavy and rolling in gray misery. He smelled the ozone. Sasuke knew that he should have put a basin on the living room coffee table, right where the leak was, but he didn't. No need to give Naruto the satisfaction.

"I can fix I myself!" the blond man had huffed two days ago. "You don't need to waste money on what a butter knife and a ninety-nine cent bucket of spackle can--"

"I want the hole in the roof fixed, not to get a permanent sun roof," Sasuke had replied coolly. "I'm calling the plumber."

Plink plink plink

I should get up.

Plink

The table will be ruined.

Plink

It's wood. It'll swell. It'll be permanent, like a cup ring stain.

Plink

…but it's warm here.

It was rare for Sasuke to wake up in the middle of the night during Spring to find Naruto laying against his chest. The air outside was warm, and the heat generally repelled the two to keep a several-inch-wide gap between their bodies. But there he was. The warm, naked skin of his lover's chest stuck to his, sweat pant-clad legs entwined with his own, yet it wasn't as uncomfortable as it should have been. Just comforting.

Sasuke pondered over this for a few moments. As if unconsciously, his right hand drifted up to sift pale fingers through a tangled mop of wild blond hair. He stroked Naruto's scalp gently with the pads of his fingers, wondering why he wasn't pushing the warm weight off of himself. The humidity was enough to make it grow uncomfortable at some point in the immediate future, so why not just--

Sasuke's hand stopped moving.

He knew why he wasn't moving away.

It was a testament to the unstable condition of his mindset that rain reminded Sasuke of that night. He remembered it clearly, vividly, as if he'd just seen it play across the TV screen they had mounted on their bedroom wall. Remembered it, like he held snapshots in his hands. But he didn't. He had something in his arms much more precious, and much more painful of a reminder, something pictures would never be able to accomplish.

But still… Sasuke was never able to explain rain.

That day was clear. Clouds had hung ominously in the sky that morning, but they'd cleared by noon. The sky was cloudless, unbearably so, the sunset so bright, so red

Plink

No. Sasuke could not explain away the rain.

It had been years, six of them, since Naruto had kissed him for the first time. Six years since the worst sin imaginable was committed. Not the unholy deed that had occurred eight years before that. Not the sin that Sasuke lived each day, not the sin he was forced to taste in the morning coffee, or the sin that stung his eyes when they made contact with Naruto's.

The worst. The worst---

Plink

Oddly enough, the rain didn't bring Sasuke guilt. Quite the opposite, in fact. It made him feel brave. It brought back to him some of the confidence he vaguely remembered from childhood.

Tell him.

No, I can't.

Tell him. He loves you.

Tell him?

Tell him.

Tell him.

He loves you.

But for Sasuke, therein lay the problem. Just as he was sure of the fact that raindrops would gravitate towards the crust of the Earth, he was sure of the fact that Naruto did not love him. Naruto loved him like he'd love the last person on the Earth. Even if that person had slaughtered millions, burned the forests to the ground, drained every lake, polluted every ocean, he would still be the only other person on the planet. The only link to sanity. The only person who could relate to him, even at the most primitive level.

That was the problem with people like Naruto and Sasuke. It was a one-in-a-million shot that they found people as deeply rooted in loneliness as they themselves were. An even greater miracle that they'd met a second time.

Plink. Plink.

Patterpatterpatterplinkplatterplink

Naruto loved the only connection he'd ever known. And it was his own naïve nature, his own ignorance, that kept him from realizing this.

Plink

And Sasuke took advantage of it.

There was movement on his shoulder, and Sasuke's hand retracted from Naruto's hair like it had been burned. Sasuke had been awake for quite some time, and his eyes, adjusted to the dark, could make out the blurry face of his lover who was blearily blinking his eyes before burying his face back into Sasuke's shoulder, grounding down as if to rub the sleep from his face. Sasuke chuckled, his voice still hoarse from sleep, his throat burning with the sound. It hurt. Like vomit, the words were bubbling at the back of his throat. This was dangerous. He wanted Naruto to keep his head there, and wait until after it stopped raining to wake up. The rain had to stop. It always stopped. It would pass, and so would this. This courage. This bravery. The will to do the right thing.

It made Sasuke sick. Fear slashed apart his insides, reset them in foreign places, made his eyes burn with tears his pride would never let free.

Of course, Naruto wouldn't stay asleep like he was supposed to. Slowly he lifted his head from Sasuke shoulder, fixed his boyfriend with a sleepy look, and murmured, "I wake you up?"

"No." Go back to sleep, Naruto, now.

Like vomit, in the back of his throat.

Plink

"You want me to gedoff?"

"No, Naruto, it's fine. Go back to sleep." Sasuke was barely noticing the over-bearing warmth right now. His whole body was on fire. It was the greatest contradiction of feelings he'd ever felt, which was saying something. His adrenaline rushed like he'd received the best news of his life, only that news was just a death warrant.

Is that what I want? To die?

To tell him?

He doesn't love me. He'll kill me. Or worse…

An excuse to die.

…he'd leave me….

Is it worth it? Is the truth worth it?

…worse then that…

To die? Die?

…I wouldn't let him leave.

Plink.

Naruto remained mercifully quiet for a while. Their room smelled strongly of ozone and the scent of the soap they'd used in the shower. The things they'd done in that shower. Sasuke held tighter, and Naruto shifted in his grip. Then….

"Sasuke? Did you leave the faucet on?"

Sasuke sighed. "No. Go to sleep."

"I hear water dripping."

"It's the rain. Now shut up and---"

"Sasuke, is that the leak in the ceiling?"

Sasuke grimaced, not saying anything. He knew it wasn't the wisest choice of action, but he was reluctant to trust himself with words. Naruto's pride, at the moment, seemed trivial to the full-blown war waging in Sasuke's head. It was ironic.

Isn't this what it's all about? Naruto's pride? His pride as a man, his pride as a human being with rights? Pride is such a silly thing. It's disgusting how trivial it is, really. Trivial. Trivial. This will pass. It'll pass.

Tell him.

To Sasuke's horror, words were being formed by his traitorous lips. "Naruto, I--"

But Naruto cut him off. "I knew it, you bastard!" He was leaning up now, one hand planted on each side of Sasuke's chest, the Asian man's arms still wrapped loosely about his shoulders."You knew it wasn't fixed, didn't you?"

All he wanted to say then, back fourteen years ago, back six years ago, during it, after it, every day that passed between then and now, was sorry. A sorry. Words, words, words,

They'll do nothing to help, nothing, you'll both die, it isn't worth it, just suffer through it--

Patterpatter

It'll go away, it always does.

Shutupshutup.

"Didn't you!?" Naruto punched Sasuke lightly on the shoulder. He wasn't angry, just making fun of him. Sasuke's arms felt heavy. Naruto sank down an inch. All he wanted, then, during, after, now, was

Plink

"I'm sorry."

So sorry, Naruto. But I can't.

Naruto blinked, not expecting an apology. Slowly, he inched down. "What?"

Sasuke didn't reply. He felt like Naruto was a misplaced organ, and he had to pull it back. So he did, managing to secure Naruto's head beneath his chin, his cool chest pressing tightly against his, his thighs clamping around Naruto's leg like a death trap.

I'm sorry.

Naruto struggled for a few moments, but Sasuke refused to relent. If anything he held on tighter, waiting out the resistance, which predictably ended half a minute later with a scoff and a sighed, "Fine, stupid. You just don't wanna admit you were wrong."

Sasuke's grip tightened around Naruto's torso.

"Oi, loosen up, Uchiha." Surname. He was serious. Or pissed. Probably the latter. Naruto had admitted to Sasuke once that he felt like a woman when he was held so tightly, almost possessively. It didn't set right for him for some unknown reason. Unknown to Naruto, not to Sasuke. Sasuke knew what Naruto's subconscious knew, something the blond refused to see for himself. "If you give me bruises, I'm going to throttle you--"

"Shut up and go back to sleep, usuratokachi," Sasuke muttered, pulling out a nickname he hadn't used in a while."

"That table's wood. It'll stain."

"The rain will stop eventually."

"What? Does that even make sense? I'm talking about the water now, Sasuke."

"It'll stop." It has to stop. It always does.

Sasuke expected a longer argument. What he really should have expected was to be wrong, which he was half the time. Naruto's behavior had the consistency of a forecast for a summer storm. There were clear options as to which way he would head, but never an accurate prediction as to which one he would choose. A muffled, "Whatever," came from somewhere below Sasuke's chin before a pair of warm lips pressed a chaste kiss to his collarbone.

It's what Sasuke liked. What he'd always wanted. A little unpredictable storm that, no matter what surprises it threw, couldn't leave. Wouldn't leave. Leaving was no longer an option for Naruto. Sasuke had spent years making this so. Years. Years. Years of lies.

The rain will stop.

Sasuke ran his hands up and down Naruto's back. Felt the muscles. Felt them turn to a puddle under his touch. Felt the warm weight shift closer, closer,

It always stops.

Stupid, Sasuke called himself, stroking muscles he'd long since memorized. Stupid. It wasn't raining that night.

It'll pass.

It always does.