Everyone is like, 17-ish.

This story is rated for slight violence, scary themes (ghosts!), and language. Dirty, dirty language.

I own nothing!

Ghosts and Graveyards

"This could get us into a lot of trouble, you know."

"Trouble, schmouble. What's wrong with bending thee rules a little?"

Libby sighed. "Sheen, you are insane. I don't want to do this."

"Don't be a fun-sucker. Like Cindy."

"Sheen, I'm right behind you. Do you want to die? You do know you put me in charge of the flashlight, right? This thing is bulky. And dangerous. And probably painful, but I wouldn't know. Do you want to find –"

"Cindy! Why are you behind us if you have the effing flashlights?!" Libby exclaimed, her eyes wide and frightened.

Cindy shrugged. "I don't really know. I thought I saw something in those bushes over there," she cast the light over to the row of low-lying bushes on the side of Jimmy Neutron's house.

Carl whirled around, having a near spaz-attack. He also had a flashlight, but it was off. "What?! Where?! I don't see anything!"

Libby exhaled deeply and Sheen launched himself into the bushes, yelling excitedly. "Turn on the flashlight, Carl. That might be of some help, yes?"

Cindy shrieked as Sheen jumped out of bushes again, landing right on top of her and succeeding in tackling her to the ground. "WHAT THE HELL, SHEEN. WHAT THE HELL."

One might wonder why Libby, Sheen, Carl, and Cindy were doing outside of Jimmy Neutron's house in the middle of the night.

It was pretty obvious they snuck out. And it was also obvious they were going to sneak Jimmy out, too.

But what were they going to do?

Ghost-hunting, of course.

It was all Sheen's idea, of course. He had heard about the haunted St. Maria church outside of Retroville on the internet. But it wasn't like he hadn't ever heard of St. Maria, because everyone knew about it. But not many people knew of its' location or the history of it.

Well, it was located in the middle of the fucking woods.

Which just made it creepier, of course. Haunted church or not, they were in for an interesting night.

Now, Cindy didn't believe in ghosts, and she knew Jimmy didn't either. She was the one who suggested that they bring Jimmy along, because even thought she exclaimed he was "annoying" and a "fun-sucker", she also knew he would be there to dispel any fears she had. Not of the "ghosts", mind you, but of the dark. (Cindy was afraid of the dark, she just never admitted it.

Oh, and she secretly hoped that Jimmy would be there to hold her hand. But you know.)

Libby didn't know if she believed in ghosts, but she was anxious all the same. You never knew what went on in the middle of the night…and in the middle of the woods.

Carl was afraid of everything. End of story. (Except for llamas.)

Since this was Sheen's idea, he was adamant to make everyone believe that he was indeed not afraid of ghosts. And he wasn't.

But then again, he had never seen a real ghost, either.

Jimmy's bedroom window opened with a slow shifting sound and Libby looked up. Jimmy looked tired, confused, and really annoyed. Great. "Hey, Jimmy. Eh…what's up?"

He blinked down at her. Carl had finally turned the flashlight on and shined it on Jimmy's face. He shut his eyes abruptly. "Jesus Christ, Carl! Shine that on something else, will you?!" He half-whispered, half-yelled. Carl complied and shined it on the ground, right on Sheen and Cindy.

Cindy was beating Sheen with the flashlight until the light in the flashlight flickered on and off.

Jimmy watched all of this for a few moments. "What the hell are you guys doing here?"

Cindy stood up, panting, and shut the flash light on and off. It stopped flickering and she grinned. She had grass in her hair and on her shirt. She flickered the light across Jimmy's face, who glared at her. "We're going on an adventure, Neutron. Get in the car."

It was twenty minutes later when they were finally on the road. Jimmy didn't want to go at first; knowing he'd probably end up getting caught and he had to go to work early in the morning. But then Cindy threw the flashlight on the ground and threatened to ring the doorbell in order to wake up his parents and he finally agreed.

Sheen was driving, Libby was next to him in the passenger seat, and Carl, Cindy, and Jimmy were squished together in the back seat, with Jimmy in the middle.

"I don't see why you couldn't sit in the middle," Jimmy grumbled to Cindy.

"Well, you see, it's kind of a funny story. I'm female and you're male. I have certain rights and those certain rights enable me to be able to sit wherever I feel like, and you can do nothing about it." She answered smugly, smirking at him.

Libby turned around and grinned at her.

Sheen was bouncing up and down in his seat. "I am SO excited. We're going to see some ghosts and then tell the whole town. We'll turn the video tape into the news and we'll even be on TV! WE'RE GOING TO BE FAMOUS!"

Cindy groaned. "Sheen, if you're going to yell in the car, at least warn us before you do. Or just roll down the windows and yell outside of the car."

Carl nodded, and Libby patted Sheen's arm. "I agree. You about burst my eardrums."

"Oh, and like Cindy doesn't yell? Because she about killed me earlier and you all did nothing!"

Jimmy chuckled. "I have to admit, that was pretty funny. It wasn't before. But now that I think about it, it really is. I'm sorry, Sheen."

"I hate you all! But especially you, Cindy."

Everyone cringed as Sheen shrieked after he got bopped on the head by Cindy's flashlight. Again.

Libby peered into the darkness of the trees as the car slowly rolled forward. "Are you sure you know where you're going?"

"Of course, Libby-cakes!" Libby blushed slightly at the nickname. "I have a GPS system, so we're all set."

Jimmy leaned forward and stared at the GPS system's screen. "Sheen, even your GPS system says we're lost. Did you put in the directions, or did you just start driving and expect the GPS system to know where we're going?"

Sheen gaped at him through the rearview mirror. "How did you know?"

Jimmy sighed and rubbed his temples. "You did this last time we went somewhere. You got us lost on the way to Dallas, remember?"

Sheen giggled and Carl shuddered at the memory. Those weren't fun times for Carl.

Cindy looked angry enough to spit. "You got us lost?! Oh my god. This is just fantastic. We're all going to fucking die out here, because of you! The car is going to run out of gas and some psychopathic serial killers are going to hunt us down, drag us out of the car, and peel our skins off to make lamp shades. And then they're going to boil us and eat us for lunch!"

Did I mention Cindy was afraid of the dark?

Carl was gaping at Cindy in horror and Libby pressed the lock button on the car door several times. Sheen was punching buttons on his GPS system, ignoring her. Jimmy just stared with fascination.

"Or…or it gets really cold and we have to park because we're all so tired and we leave the car on so we don't freeze to death and then the car fills with carbon monoxide and we all die in our sleep! Or what if-"

"Cindy, that's enough. You're scaring Carl." Jimmy deadpanned, putting a hand on her thigh to stop her.

Cindy peered past him, looking at Carl. He was sucking air from his inhaler and clutching his chest. "Oh, sorry Carl. I guess you can say I have an overactive imagination." She smiled at him cheerily.

"I'd say," Libby muttered, slumping against the door and closing her eyes with despair.

Cindy took a few deep breaths, trying to think cheerful thoughts. Like ice cream sundaes and her warm, soft bed…and Jimmy's hand on her thigh…

Um, Jimmy's hand on her thigh? His hand was on her thigh. It was warm. It wasn't moving. Okay, his thumb is moving now. It's like caressing –

Sheen grabbed the GPS system and threw it on the floor at Libby's feet, and she didn't open her eyes. He cursed like a sailor at it and slammed on the brakes.

As luck would have it, he would've had to stop anyway.

The church was less than thirty feet away from the car.

Libby stared out of the windshield, frozen. "That is one creepy old church," She observed, tightening her grip on her seatbelt until her knuckles turned white from blood loss.

Carl whimpered. "I'm not getting out of this car. You guys have fun."

Sheen whipped around and glared at him. "You are coming with us, Carl, even if I have to drag you out of this car."

Cindy giggled. "If Sheen doesn't drag you out of this car, then the psychopathic serial killers will."

Carl was out of the car in less than ten seconds, and the rest of the members of the "adventure" were pretty impressed.

Jimmy looked at Cindy with admiration. "That was amazing," He said quietly.

Cindy felt a little giddy. All she could feel was his hand, still warm, on her thigh. "Oh, thanks…"

Libby turned around and stared at her two best friends. She smiled and said, "Okay, you crazy kids. Let's go find some ghosts. I'd rather not be caught by any serial killers."

Cindy blinked and glanced at the church for a few moments. Then she turned back to Jimmy. "Let's do this."

On the steps of the old church not even ten minutes later, Cindy abruptly had a change of heart. "Let's not do this." She clutched Jimmy's arm as if the claws of the devil were trying to drag her down to hell.

In other words, Jimmy felt as if she were trying to dislocate his arm from the rest of his body. He winced, but didn't say a word.

Sheen still wasn't scared. Carl was cowering behind Libby, who was holding his flashlight. "It's okay, guys," Libby said casually, but she didn't believe it herself. The anticipation was killing her. There could be dead bodies of priests in that church, ready to scare the living hell out of her.

Libby shook her head and tried to remove those disturbing thoughts. She spends too much time with Cindy.

"What if we go in and there's a piano? Like one of those church-organ pianos?"

Jimmy raised his brow. "So?"

"Well, it's all cool at first, and then what if it starts playing on its own? And we get all freaked out but decide to stay in the church anyways because it's just our imagination, and then we all get separated and then the ghosts-slash-serial-killers hang our petrified bodies from the ceiling?"

Carl fell to the ground. Libby glared at her harshly. "Why didn't I think to bring the duct tape so I can get you to shut up with all of these dumb stories?"

Jimmy had to admit, his girl-crush-love-person was nuts. "You watch too many movies," He said.

Cindy looked at them with serious, bright eyes. "I'm serious. It'll happen. Don't say I didn't warn you."

Carl wheezed and coughed. "If I see a piano, I'm leaving. I don't care what you guys say."

Sheen stomped his foot. "Stop this nonsense! Nothing bad is going to happen! I mean, the ghosts in this church are going to be nice ghosts, anyways! Duh. You should all know this."

Jimmy snickered. "I don't know who's more delusional – Cindy or Sheen."

Libby laughed along with him as Sheen opened the huge, wooden door to the church. Cindy slapped Jimmy in the arm. "Not funny."

The laughter abruptly died as the door creaked open and revealed the dark inside of the old church. Carl backed away, nearly stumbling and falling down the steps. "I'm not going in there!"

Before he could turn and run off, Libby grabbed his arm and shoved him inside, making him run into Sheen, who shrieked and fell down. Cindy turned to look up at Jimmy as they followed behind their three friends.

"I don't think we have to worry about ghosts. They'll be scared off once they see Sheen and Carl."

Sheen scowled. "This is a Catholic church!"

Libby sighed. "It is called St. Maria, Sheen. What did you expect?"

"Do you have something against Catholics, Sheen? I'm half-Catholic." Cindy stated proudly, shining the flashlight in Sheen's eyes.

He winced. "No, I'm not. But think about it: Catholic churches focus on the artistry and other churches usually have more rooms in them. Do you really think that a Catholic church has secret closets? It's like one big freaking room!"

Libby just rolled her eyes. "How would you know? It's not like you're an expert on Catholic churches, or anything."

Sheen gazed at her with serious eyes. "Oh…you never know…"

Jimmy was appalled, "How the hell can you be half-Catholic? You're either Catholic or you're not."

Cindy shrugged. "My mom used to be Catholic. Or something."

He just shook his head at her. "Well, this was fun. I say we leave now."

Sheen turned on him, incredulous, "I DON'T THINK SO. WE HAVEN'T SEEN ANY GHOSTS YET!"

Libby listened to his voice echo off the walls, her face turned up towards the ceiling. "You should turn on your camera now, Sheen. Just in case the ghosts decide to attack you because you're being SO FREAKING LOUD!"

The closed door behind them creaked and groaned. Cindy cackled, and Jimmy knew right then and there that he was probably going to go to hell.

Carl was sitting in a dusty, old pew and breathing heavily. "I don't like this."

Libby smiled sympathetically. "We'll be out of here in no time, Carl. Like Sheen said, there are probably not many places to explore."

Cindy had wandered off, going in the opposite direction of Sheen, who was standing at the head of the church. He had found a priest's outfit and was putting it on. "It smells moldy, but I think I look legit, don't you think?"

Libby looked horrified. "Take that off, Sheen! You don't know where it's been!"

"I know where it's been. It's been sitting in this church for 5,000 years; that's where it's been!"

Libby shook her head and moved to follow Cindy. Jimmy tried to wrestle away the dusty fabric away from Sheen, who was just not giving in.

"GUYS. I FOUND A COAT CLOSET. THIS IS LIKE THE LAIR OF ALL THINGS GHOST," Cindy called from the back. Carl didn't move. He was just sitting…staring…breathing. Jimmy was slightly afraid that he was going to be stuck like that, looking like a zombie forever.

Sheen took this moment to his advantage and grabbed the priest's outfit and ran down the center aisle to check out the coat closet.

Jimmy followed behind him slowly, grabbing the turned off flashlight out of Carl's hands. "Come on, Carl. Unless you want us to leave you behind…"

He was out of his seat in seconds, following closely behind Sheen, who was marveling over the foul-smelling coat closet.

Jimmy surveyed the main room of the church, glancing from the altar to the pews to the ceiling and back again. There wasn't anything very interesting about this church. Everything was old and had a layer of dust on it. It wasn't even that scary, either. It was all just hype.

"Jimmy, you should see this!" He heard Cindy call from her station in the coat closet. He looked back and saw that all four of his friends had squished themselves in one little closet. How did they manage that?

He peered into the closet warily, so he was completely unprepared when Cindy grabbed his arm and pulled him into the closet.

There were a few things that Jimmy took note of:

One: it was extremely dark.

Two: it smelled really bad.

And three: he was also really, extremely close to Cindy. Also, her hand was still on his arm.

Libby was holding the other flashlight now, and she was smiling. "Sheen found a secret compartment. You can go in next, Jimmy. We'll just follow because we're…" She trailed off, not smiling anymore.

Jimmy sighed. "You know the whole ghost thing is fake, right? Ghosts don't exist." He started to walk forward, though, the two girls and one boy in tow. He didn't see the shared look between Cindy and Libby and Cindy mouth, I told you so.

Carl was gripping Jimmy's other arm, and Cindy giggled. "Looks like I have competition," she whispered to Libby, hoping that Jimmy didn't hear.

He did. He shook Carl's arm off, who just grabbed it again and this time, could not be shaken off. Jimmy glanced at Cindy, who moved closer to him but didn't dare meet his eye.

"I thought Sheen was in here," Carl said shakily.

It seemed that they were in a hallway now. Jimmy noticed that at the end of the hallway, there was a small sliver of light. There must be another door that led outside, or something. This was strange, to say the least.

"Is that a door?" Libby cast her light at the end of the hallway.

"Yeah, it is," Jimmy murmured.

Moments later when they reached the door, it was slightly ajar. Sheen had already been through.

Cindy stopped him from opening the door. "Wait! You don't know what's out there. It could be another room, where a creepy cult/clan sacrifice small animals and people and have creepy clan meetings. Or maybe it leads to outside and it's all just a dangerous trap and –"

"I don't want to hear this!" Carl put his hands over his ears. "Make her stop! She's insane!"

Cindy stared at him. "Carl, you need to open your eyes. You have to be prepared! You don't know what's going to happen next!"

Jimmy looked past Cindy to Libby, and said, "Libby, no more horror, suspense, or mystery movies for Cindy. Ever. Got it?"

Libby nodded, and he could see that she agreed.

Cindy sent him a withering glare. "Jimmy, if we do not make it out of this experience alive, I just want you to know –"

"Cindy, we're not going to die." Jimmy stated gravely, and Libby smiled. This was it! This was the moment that should've happened years ago!

Cindy smacked him in the arm. "Listen to me! I was just going to say that if we don't make it out of this alive, I just want you to know that I am not a bitch. Whatever you think of me, I am not as mean as I act. I promise."

Jimmy wasn't sure what he was expecting, but it wasn't this. He sure he was going to hear something dramatic…a love confession? A hate confession? Something not dramatic at all?

Either way, he had to admit this Cindy Vortex was full of surprises. "I know, Cindy."

She blinked at him. "You know?"

"Of course. I know you're not a bitch. You're just…tough."

Libby rolled her eyes, unsatisfied. Carl looked slightly lost, and he seemed more focused on what was on the other side of the door. Cindy smiled. "Oh, well…good. Because that's exactly it!"

Jimmy gripped her hand and opened the door and led them out into the unknown.

"Guys, guys!" Sheen ran towards them, waving his arms. "It's a cemetery."

Carl about cried. "I hate cemeteries. Especially old ones, creepy ones in the middle of nowhere where creepy cults are going to sacrifice humans and psychopaths are going to peel off my skin and make lampshades out of it!" He wailed, and Cindy grinned at him proudly.

"Welcome to the real world, my friend," She nodded, putting a hand on his shoulder. He flinched away from her tight grip. "Welcome."

Sheen looked at them with a strange look on his face. "Okay, bringing Cindy was a bad idea. She's batshit crazy."

Libby looked around with interest. "You know, old cemeteries have always interested me. It's kind of like a piece of the past, old history…"

She roamed around, touching the weather-beaten headstones and trying to decipher the carved writing that had worn with time. Jimmy followed Cindy, who was following Carl, who was aimlessly trying to find a safe escape route so that he could run away without being killed, sacrificed, or followed by Cindy.

Who was definitely going batshit crazy.

Everything seemed peaceful at that moment, all quiet and dark. You could hear the footsteps against the grass, wet with dew, and a shuffling somewhere in the woods…

Shuffling? Oh wait, that's not normal.

Sheen immediately zoomed his camera into the woods, trying to find the source of the sound. Libby hovered behind him. She figured he was the most ghost-savvy, if not a bit reckless, and she also figured that if ghosts were going to attack, they'd probably attack Cindy because she was the most demonic. But she meant that in the kindest way possible. Not the exorcist-spinning-head kind of demonic, but the I-will-creep-you-the-fuck-out-with-my-creepy-imagination kind of demonic.

Cindy clung to Jimmy, not because she was afraid of the thought of a potential ghost in the woods, but of the dark.

Carl was making a beeline to the car, and he desperately hoped the car doors were unlocked. Because if they weren't, he was officially screwed and he would probably have a panic attack and die…hopefully before the cult members/psychopaths got to him.

"Who's there?" Sheen called. "We mean no harm…show yourselves!"

The shuffling stopped, and then started again. Stopped, then started again. And soon, it stopped altogether.

Libby started laughing. "IT'S A FREAKING RABBIT."

Just as she said that, the door they had all exited out from just minutes ago was opening again, this time it was rough and it hit the side of the church with a bang. The group screamed (yes, even Jimmy…and even Sheen) and they ran, holding hands and Sheen almost dropped his keys but he managed to get it all on tape and Libby was almost crying and Cindy kept wailing, "I told you so, I told you so! I love you, Jimmy!" But Jimmy was too focused on getting to the car to even process what she was saying.

Carl was already in the car, and when he saw them all running towards the car and screaming at the top of their lungs, he screamed too and once they were all in, Sheen took off and it wasn't until they were safely on the road when they all finally stopped screaming.

"Oh my effing god," Libby sobbed, her head resting on her closed window. "I thought we were dead."

Sheen wasn't any less calm than before. He was bouncing in his seat, driving to speeds up to 80 mph, but he was more anxious than scared. He was excited to see what was on his camera. "Dude, Carl, I can't believe you missed it all. You ran at the sound of a rabbit. Just think what you would've done if you saw what we saw!"

"He probably would've keeled over and died," Cindy said simply, her face a calm, blank mask.

Carl was silent. "Well, I'm glad I ran when I did. I don't want to be traumatized for life."

"You're lucky, Carl!" Libby cried out. "That was horrible! We're never doing anything like this ever again."

Cindy laughed. Of all things, she laughed. Jimmy stared at her as if she was the most absurd person in the world.

"Oh, that was so hilarious."

Libby whirled around and stared at her accusingly. "You didn't think it was hilarious when it was happening!"

"Of course I didn't! It was scary then! But come on, guys. What do you think it was? A ghost? Yeah, right. It was most likely just a gust of wind." She kept laughing.

Now everyone was quiet, very surprised…but Carl was the most surprised.

"But…but you were talking about all that stuff. The killers and the cult –"

"Oh, Carl, when did you ever start to take me so seriously?" She smiled. "I was caught up in the moment, really. I don't believe in ghosts or serial killers in the night or cults in the creepy churches. It was just an adrenaline rush."

Libby took a deep breath. "I'll remember that when I go to sleep tonight and I have nightmares."

Everyone had gone home. But Cindy had stayed behind with Jimmy right after Sheen dropped them off together. They were standing in the middle of the street.

"So you don't believe in ghosts, huh?" Jimmy asked, his brows arched. Cindy shook her head, smiling. "Or serial killers in the night?" Another shake of head. "Or cults in creepy churches?" Cindy sighed. "What about the dark? Are you afraid of the dark?"

She froze. "Uh…no. Of course not."

Jimmy shrugged. "Oh. If you say so. But I was just going to offer to walk you home, since it's dark now. But I guess you don't need me…"

"No! I mean, you can walk me home. If you want."

"Yes, Cindy. I want."

She smiled and they turned towards her house, walking slowly.

"You know, I heard you while we were running."

She glanced at him nervously. "Um…really? What did I say again?"

"You said I told you so! And…I love you, Jimmy!"

Deflating, Cindy felt like sinking into the grass and going to sleep. This was a tiring night.

"Oh, that. I said that. And I meant it, too. I told you I wasn't mean."

"You tell me a lot of things."

"But you always listen, right?"

He tugged on her hand and pulled her to him. "I always listen to everything you say," he said, smiling down at her. They were underneath her window.

"Oh. I always listen to everything you say. I mean the interesting things. You don't always say the most interesting things because sometimes you talk about all this scientific stuff and have you noticed that people's eyes glaze over when you talk about that stuff? That means they're bored –"

Jimmy kind of figured that there was a simple way to stop Cindy from talking, and that was to kiss her. He wasn't lying when he said he listened to everything she said, but this way, he didn't have to listen because she wasn't saying anything.

One kiss turned into two, and two turned into seventeen, until they finally said their goodbye's and promised to see each other tomorrow and the day after that.

Jimmy silently decided that ghost-hunting was a good idea. Whether ghosts were real or not.

End. But wait…

--

"It was a gust of wind."

"Nah, it was a ghost. I mean, ghosts are sort of invincible when it comes to cameras and video cameras. It should look like a ray of light or spots of light or wisps of light or whatever. You know?"

"Yeah, sure. But I don't see any rays or spots or wisps. It was a freaking gust of wind."

"This is so going on the internet."

Ah, the video. I couldn't forget that.

This was the longest one-shot I've ever written.

Please review!

P.S. Everything hear is purely humorous. Carl isn't REALLY afraid of "everything." Cindy isn't really that "batshit crazy." And I wasn't making fun of Catholics, considering I am one! (: