Title: One Soul Condemned To Heaven and Hell {1-60}
Author: Emono
Rating: FRM
Fandom: Supernatural/RPS
Pairings: Sam Winchester/Jared Padalecki, Dean Winchester/Jensen Ackles
Disclaimer: I do not own the souls of J2, or Sam…or Dean…or anyone…not even my own *le sigh* It's all Kripke and McG, the lucky bastards
Summary: Sam meets an interesting young man, and soon finds out that he and one Jensen Ackles are more than mere actors. As they find their lives entwined, more secrets are revealed and sacrifices must be made. Castiel must help the best he can, but not even John Winchester could see the fate the boys have laid out for themselves since birth. Can Sam keep control? Can Jensen keep Dean happy? Can Castiel deal with the sin he has laid out for himself? Can the world handle the joined power of J2 and The Winchester brothers?
Beta: gil_follower
Warnings: Post-Hell!Dean, very AU, SLASH!!, takes place Season 3, Demon!Sam, whumping, angst, OOC-ness, violence, SPOILERS!!!!

(AN: My first Supernatural fic! *squee* Now I'm going to jump between flashbacks and present during the first three chapters, try to stay with me. It's probably going to get very confusing, because I started it six months after the story should technically start. Crap, how do I explain this…

VERY IMPORTANT:
Dean has just got back from Hell, but John Winchester is still alive. Azazel is still out there, and John's still hunting him. The first seal was broken in Hell by Dean and a few are still in the process of being broken by Lilith, but all those really seriously evil demons are only released on Azazel's death (so nothing more dangerous than a few Chimera, Faerie, and some werewolves are on Earth.) This is around 2005 time period. Jared is finishing up his stunt on House of Wax and his Gilmore Girls thing has just ended. Jensen is finished with Devour and is wrapping up his Smallville stint. Yes, I know Supernatural started around that time, but this is an AU. For argument's sake, let's say Sam is 27 and Dean is 31, which makes their counterparts the same age (think Jensen from Dark Angel and Jared from the Pilot episode with their Season 4 character selves) Ruby and Sam were only together about three times, he despises her actually. Google says Jared Padalecki's eye color is blue/green, so be it. But Sam's eyes are hazel, and go black when he uses his powers. Did I mention this was a severe AU?)

Dean awoke to a low noise, the TV was on. He blinked dully down into off-white sheets, a little more than agitated at being woken up at…Dean turned his head to see the clock. It was around eight…what the hell was on at eight in the morning?! It better be porn, and it better be free.

Dean sat up enough to turn and look, finding Sam sitting like a little kid in front of the TV. Legs crossed, hands folded, eyes set on the screen intently. The older man didn't have to observe this long before he realized what was on the TV, and immediately let loose a bark of laughter.

Sam jerked, scrambling forward to change the channel. But it was too late, Dean saw.

"You really couldn't get any more gay, could you?" Dean laughed so hard it nearly made him breathless, the flush on his brother's cheek "Seriously, man? Gilmore Girls?"

"Shut up, Jerk" Sam turned it to the news and kept it there, absolutely sulking.

Dean just laid back down, and with a barely contained snort he fell into sleep.

Sam double-checked, making sure that his brother was snoring again before flipping it back to the show.

()()()

Sam typed away rapidly on his keyboard, then clicked and searched some more. His eyes were bloodshot and strained, but he kept his lips pursed in a thin line. Dean was on one of the two beds he had claimed as his own, smirking triumphantly at once again having provoked his little brother. He sharpened one of his favored knives, the metal warming beneath his touch.

Dean scoffed, "Haven't you found anything yet?"

"Give me a minute" Sam's voice was hoarse, but he said no more to give himself away. The last thing he wanted to do was encourage more talking, especially so soon after a fight.

Sam scribbled down a few things about vengeful medieval witches. It was harder than you would think, most of those badass babes went underground around the 18th century. One had sprung up, terrorizing a high school in New Eden, Montana. The bitch was doing it for fun, levitating desks and knocking students down flights of stairs. But they couldn't even start for her until they knew what they were up against.

"Oh, quit being a bitch about this" Dean's previous triumphant grin was now a grimace of annoyance "If you'd just lighten up-"

"What's there to lighten up?" Sam snapped "My only brother thinks I'm a burden!"

"I didn't say it like that, I didn't mean…" Dean's voice was gentle, but it hardened once he realized he had nothing to apologize for "You know what, Sam? At the moment, you are lagging me. Let's forget the whole "I gave my soul and went to Hell for you" thing, just for second. I let this brooding shit go for a while, cause yeah…you lost some people and some fucked up shit has happened to you. But you're not alone. And to start this shit again…well fuck you, man."

"You're blowing this wait out of proportion!" Sam countered, disbelief etched in his eyes "What you said was completely out of line!"

"Whatever" Dean stood, strapping on his knife before grabbing his coat "I meant what I said earlier, after the vampires were done? If you ever fuckin' hesitate again, I'll leave you. You're no use to me terror-stricken, I thought you were over all that shit. So suck it up Sammy, or go home."

"You're my home, Jerk" Sam pointed out, though he was fighting off embarrassing tears "You know that."

"You know what I mean, man" Dean glared, then slipped on his coat and started towards the door "You're fuckin' depressing. I'm gonna go out, prowl for some warmer company."

Sam attempted a jab, "I'm the only company you can keep who will put up with you for more than a night."

"Bitch" Dean turned, casting his brother a filthy look "Go out and get laid, bro. You're too edgy, it's like all you do it jitter around."

"Maybe I need something more than a one night fling, huh?" the blonde snapped "What if I'm waiting for something long term?"

Jade eyes flashed with something akin to understanding, "Then you're in the wrong profession, Sammy."

Then Dean was gone, an owl out into the night.

Sam closed his laptop with a growl, all but tossing it onto the table between the two queen beds.

It was times like this that made him regret going with Dean that day, father missing or not. Sometimes he wished he would have told his brother to go fuck himself and slammed the door in his face. Sometimes he wished he would have stayed in college, honed his law skills, joined a firm. Become slick and savvy, have a wife and 2.5 kids. A white picket fence, a dog or two, the whole she-bang.

No…

Instead Sam had a supernatural life. Filled with graves, ghosts, and ghouls that all wanted to kill him. He had a grumpy older brother to deal with, who mood-swinged between happy/broody/angry/lustful without a milliseconds notice. A brother he almost never saw at night, since Dean would find a new flavor every time he went out. Sam had his research, cases, no parents, no guidance.

The only thing that was right with his life…well, it wasn't here.

There was a knock on the door, startling him from his melancholy thoughts. He hesitantly rose to his feet, wondering if Dean had forgotten something. The hotel they had chosen was pretty seedy, dark and cheap. The wallpaper was ratty, and the carpet was threadbare. Dean was a Winchester, he could pick a lock if he needed back in. Hell, was it even locked?

Did ghouls knock before ripping out your throat?

"Sam?" a tentative voice called from the other side of the door. Sam all but ran to it, throwing the door open with a flourish to reveal the person on the other side. The man looked so much younger than him even at the same age, it was his physique that would throw someone off. He was only a little shorter than Sam, and his hair was lighter with honey highlights, but otherwise strikingly similar. Sam had a stronger cut to his jaw and a more defined body, but the other man held a delicate prettiness about him.

Fresh scrubbed skin, soft hair, simple but clean clothes.

"Oh Sam" the man sighed, eyes roaming over the Winchester. The slighter one noted how dirt had embedded itself into every crevice and pore of Sam's lovely skin, making him appear unkempt and as sooty as a mutt.

"Jared?" Sam's voice was nothing short of a relieved sigh, but it was still a question.

"I got your e-mail, about how Dean's been on the fritz lately" Jared Padalecki shoved his hands into his pockets, suddenly shy "I was filming our show with Jensen a state over, and decided to come see you."

Sam couldn't help but laugh humorlessly, "Kripke let you off?"

"Eric understands" Jared bit the side of his lip "Is this a bad time?"

"Come here, Jay" Sam pulled the man inside and into his arms, the door swung shut with only a single thought. He savored the contact, nearly moaning as Jared wrapped his arms around his waist in a returning hug. "Missed you, baby."

"Missed you more" Jared teased, pulling back enough to brush their lips "You look horrible, Sammy. Have you been sleeping? When was the last time you ate?"

"I can't honestly remember" Sam murmured, nuzzling the curve of his lover's cheek "I just…"

"Come on, tell me" Jared gently eased Sam towards the bed, cupping one of the taller man's hands with both of his. Sam followed obediently, so pleased just to have the man with him again.

With a single push, Sam had his lover spread out on his bed. Jared sat up on his elbows, but made no move to try and get up to get away. Sam crawled above him, straddling his lean hips and staring down into his face. So pretty…and all his. He captured the man's lips, coaxing a moan out of him as they met from hips to chest. They moved together as if they had done this for years, not just months.

"Love you, Jay" Sam admitted between breaths, eyes glinting darkly for a single moment.

"Love you too, Sammy" their kisses were lighter, words whispered in love "I miss you every moment you're not with me…all the time…so much…"

The Winchester nodded, "It hurts when I'm not with you."

Sam laced their fingers, dragging Jared's hands up beside his head and pinning them there. Their kisses deepened, tasting each other truly for the first time in weeks. The lightheadedness only added a degree to their contact, blurring where one body started and the other stopped. Sam's hand slipped beneath his lover's t-shirt, skimming over a firm stomach and relishing the goosebumps that popped up beneath his touch. Jared dug his fingertips in the dip of the taller man's back in retaliation, forcing another harsh groan that reverberated through them.

It felt so right, like the very touch of this man healed him.

It had always been like this with Jared, ever since they first met. It was so cliché, it made them grin just to think about it. There had been a ghost in LA that liked to cause traffic accidents, and it only got stronger with each death. They had the remains salted and burned in less than four hours, giving them some time to get some food and soak in the sun. They had just gotten out of Washington, which was so fuckin' overcast and gloomy. So they lingered to enjoy every minute of sunlight.

Sam had gone straight for a glass-walled café, less people but filled with the rich smell of coffee. He had gone up to the counter and ordered some gay-sounding espresso. Caramel mocha-double shot milk-swirl, whip cream, chocolate shavings…it had made his mouth water at the sight.

The memory was fresh in his mind, the first time he ever laid eyes on Jared.

()()()

Back-Flash
Six Months Ago

Sam tried not to flush at the look the cute boy behind the counter gave him, eyes straying everywhere but on him. He finally let them settle on the glass-covered pastry shelves, mouth watering at the last perfect blueberry muffin. With a simple request, the blonde boy handed it over and gave the total (not nearly enough for the order.)

Sam's brow crossed, "Are you sure?"

"Yeah, pretty boy" a card with a number on it was slipped into his hand along with the muffin "Maybe you can make it up to me later."

Sam flashed the man a brilliant watt smile and nodded, knowing it was a lie. He settled for a table in corner of the shop, perfect for admiring the busy street outside. He sucked at the drink like it was ambrosia, trying desperately not to moan out loud. He just let his mind wander, pondering things like what Dean was doing and how close the nearest book store was on foot. He let the world fade away for a few moments, at ease.

He could almost pretend he had said no to Dean all that time ago, he could almost pretend he was still a college student taking a break from his studies.

"You owe me."

Sam jolted, knocking the straw from his lips. A man sat down before him, almost glaring. He was clutching his own iced coffee, half-gone. Dark emerald sunglasses were perched atop a mop of honey-brown hair, fierce Nile green eyes bore into him. Sam flushed clear up to his roots…the man was very attractive. There was a hard set to his soft jaw, an intimidating gesture that he himself had done many times.

Then everything caught up with Sam, "I what?"

"You owe me, that's my muffin" the man's lips quirked "You were too busy flirting with Corey to see me standing in line, eyeing that same muffin. So, be rights, that makes it mine."

Sam glanced down at the pastry, "But I paid for it. Legally, that makes it mine."

"Touché" the man broke out into a full grin, leaning back in his chest and sticking the straw of his drink between his lips "But could you be a love and share?"

Sam raised a brow at the attractive display, "I don't share my muffins with strangers, I need a name first."

"Padalecki-comma-Jared" the brunette's eyes sparkled "You're too kind."

"It's kind of my thing" Sam pulled his hip-knife from it's sheath, slicing the pastry down the middle with one graceful movement before wiping it off on his pants and replacing it. Jared seemed completely unfazed, just ecstatic to have a piece of the muffin. They got two napkins and put their share on each.

"And you?" Jared gazed at him from beneath honey-spun lashes "I didn't catch your name, knife-wielder."

"Sam" the Winchester replied, the tone of his voice said that he wouldn't reveal more.

"Sam" the name sounded almost ethereal on his lips "Well, Sam, I don't share my muffins with just anyone. Do you-?"

"Dean? Oh my God, it's you!" a small teeney bopper squealed, appearing beside them. Sam immediately tensed at his brother's name, going on edge. "C-Can I…? Would you…?"

"Here you are, sweetie" Jared pulled out a pen and held out his hand. She immediately supplied a flipped open star-booklet, nearly full. He signed it dutifully, a brilliant smile on his face. "How long have you watched the show?"

"Since I saw you" she nearly swooned, her mother coming up behind her "It's Dean, mom!"

"Mr. Padalecki, my girl sure does enjoy your show" her voice was near southern, gentle lines forming beside her eyes as she smiled and took her daughter's hand "But we don't want to ruin your date. Let's go, Brina-Lee."

The two were gone like that, leaving the men alone.

"What was that?" Sam's fingers uncurled from the knife sheath "I thought you said your name was Jared?"

"It is" Jared shrugged, sipping at his drink again and looking collected "I play Dean on Gilmore Girls, but that's wrapping up. Some fans think it's my name, it's no big deal."

"Oh" Sam had heard of that show before "So…you're like some huge successful, A-list actor, huh?"

"I'm a starlet, honey" Jared laced in a thick southern belle accent, then laughed at the sound of his own voice "But yeah, I do what I can. I'm not real big or anything, but I make money doing what I love."

They laughed and talked about other things. LA weather, and how the LA people seemed to come in every shade of orange. It was an easy ebb-and-flow of conversation, both pointedly ignoring the fact that they were strangers and didn't know a thing about their lives before each other. Sam mentioned Dean, which sent Jared into a titter about his own "normal" brother and sister who his parents adored.

"They hate that I'm an actor and rocking it" Jared pouted cutely, then promptly demanded Chris bring them another round (a loud request across the room) before lowering his voice "My mom's an English teacher and my dad's an accountant. Can you believe how boring they are?"

It wasn't until two and a half hours later that they realized how long they'd been there, three rounds between them. They were both a bit wired from the coffee, so Jared suggested a walk around. They left together, splitting the total tab with minimal fighting which only ended in more pouting.

Their feet and conversation took them to a nearby park, the sun warming their faces as plush grass gave way beneath their sneakers. Jared talked a bit more about the perks of acting, and how his newest movie House of Wax was wrapping up.

"Yet again, I'll be jobless" Jared pouted, but it didn't stay for long "What about you, Sam? What do you do for a living?"

"I'm a…private detective" Sam half-lied, and he knew in an instant that his lie had been spotted. But Jared didn't call him out on it. Instead, they began a discussion on the evils of junk-good books and romance novels.

"Historical fiction, man, that's where it's at" Jared pointed out with a flourish of his hands "There's nothing better than learning while looking through a fiction-coated lens."

"No way" Sam countered playfully "Mysteries are it, end of story. Mysteries work you, you're thinking the entire time…going over every possibilities, wracking your mind. You can lose yourself in it, and all else disappears."

"So you like mysteries, Sammy?" Jared walked out in front of him, blocking his way "Can you figure me out?"

"Maybe I can" Sam's brain began to whir like a freshly booted CPU, all his thoughts and attention on Jared "The way you picked your muffin apart instead of eating it whole means you like to be in control, have everything organized the way you want it. The way you came right up to me and sat down shows you're reckless, but otherwise friendly. Your taste in books shows you're smart, but not serious. Playful, yet wise. You've seen enough to know where you're going, but not enough to see how it ends."

"You missed one important thing, smart guy" Jared stepped closer, flushed at the compliments.

The taller didn't move away, savoring the proximity, "What?"

"You failed to mention the fact that I am wildly attracted to you, moth-flame syndrome" Jared leant in "And that I want to kiss you within an inch of your life."

Sam wanted nothing more. He wanted to kiss and live, hold and snuggle and just be normal! Hell, if he gave his life up for anyone, it'd be someone as entertaining and as full of life as Jared was. He wanted this fond attraction between them to grow and thrive, to develop into deep Everlasting-Apple love.

But when Jared's lips fluttered against his, he turned his head away. He brushed their cheeks, savoring the warmth and smooth skin against his. Somehow their wide palms met at the same time, fingers curling together intimately.

Something clicked inside them, locking them together mentally as if trapped in handcuffs.

"I want to, I do" Sam admitted softly, nuzzling the other "But we shouldn't."

"Life's too short to wait" Jared pointed out, but let go of the other and respected his space "But I understand, man."

"I'm leaving tomorrow" Sam chewed at his lower lip, desperate to explain away this pain in his chest "I don't want you to feel…used, Jared. This is a good thing between us, I just don't want to…to ruin it. I ruin everything I touch and I don't want-"

Fingertips landed over his lips, silencing him effectively.

"You're a good guy, Sam" Jared put on a mock-hurt face "I guess I'll just have to wait. You hold my heart, dude, don't lose it."

With a put-out sigh, Jared flopped cross-legged on the ground. As Sam looked on curiously, Jared took out a pen and note card. He scribbled several things down in quick succession, pausing longer on the last line. He used his thigh as a flat surface, tongue flicking out over his lower lip as he wrote. After a minute, he jumped back up and shoved the card into the older man's hand.

"Take this" Jared declared "It's my cell, address here in LA, and e-mail. Only you and -like- four people know this…if it leaks, I'll know it was you."

The hunter flushed, "I would never, Jay.""I know" Jared positively fluttered "You called me 'Jay'."

"Sorry."

"Never apologize for something that makes me smile" Jared slipped his sunglasses over his eyes "Call me, text me, IM me. Whenever you need, Sammy, I'm never too busy. If I don't hear from you, it would break my heart. You don't want that, do you?"

Sam shook his head obediently.

"Good" Jared brushed a kiss across his cheek "Now be a good boy and walk me back to my apartment, would ya?"

()()()

Present

That had been exactly six months ago, not two weeks after Dean came back from Hell. They e-mailed back and forth like mad, exchanging phone calls every other day like they were dating. It was always the highlight of his day, between the ghouls and Dean's evasive/defensive attitude. It was innocent at first, the touches chaste, lips never sought anything other than a cheek or a peck on another mouth.

That was until Jared's life was put into danger and all was finally revealed between them.

TBC

They say don't trust