Chances are I didn't type this chapter in one sitting. My ideas are scattered. But guess who finally appears today! That's right! The giant monster that eats everything! I mean Patti and Carne! Eh, same thing.

I am so, so sorry that this was not up sooner! You guys are the greatest! You deserve a faster update.

Chapter Six – Patti and Carne

I can't remember which day it was exactly. All I know was that we still had the Help Wanted poster up. We had actually gained quite the publicity despite our small size. We had not quite opened up for the day. By that time it was mostly just me, the old man, and a few others.

I was out in the main room, finishing with the tables and starting to sweep up. For some reason Zeff always wanted me to do these sorts of jobs instead of our hired help. I suspect it was to keep me out of his hair or something.

The sound of the doors banging open wasn't what caught my attention. People had a habit of banging open the doors all the time. It was the obnoxiously loud voices that followed that made me look up.

"Hey!" The bigger man said to absolutely no one in particular. "Is this 'Red Shoes' Zeff's Grub shop?"

"Is this 'Help Wanted: Crap-Cooks Welcome' for real?" the smaller, chubbier man added. Putting on a straight face, I turned and looked them right in the eyes.

"No," I replied calmly. "We just put that sign up to see how many suckers we can fool into coming in here and asking that. Congratulations, you're numbers twenty-eight and twenty-nine."

The two of them stared at me with blank, wide-eyed confusion, as if they had no idea if I was being serious or not. After all, here was an eleven year old, working here and already making cracks at them. I imagine they would have stood there stupidly for quite some time if they weren't saved by Chef Zeff entering the room and clomping over to us.

"Don't mind him," Zeff told them, nudging me aside. "He always acts like that around strangers. I've been trying to teach him some manners, but it's not going along quite well."

I glared at him, wanting to point out that I knew how to behave just fine and that I was better with strangers than he was. The two newcomers glanced at each other and then back at Zeff.

"So, you're the famous Red Shoes Zeff, huh?" the bigger one asked. "When we heard about it back at the main land, we could barely believe it."

"We're always getting kicked out of other restaurants for fighting, but we're really good cooks anyways," the smaller man told us. His companion hit him over the back of his head.

"Idiot!" he growled. "Don't tell 'em that! He'll never hire us at this rate!" Zeff smirked.

"Oh, I wouldn't say that," he replied. "You need to be tough if you're going to work in my restaurant. The rest means nothing if you can't keep up."

"Zeff is tougher than any pirate around," I added helpfully. "Fighting pirates and others is nothing compared to working with him." Zeff glared down at me, but didn't say anything as he turned back to the two hopefuls.

"So, what are your names, anyways?" he asked them.

"Patti and Carne, Chef Zeff," they answered. He looked them up and down, doing some sort of assessment in his head. I stood by his side, arms folded, watching them under Zeff's cold scrutiny. Finally, he spoke again.

"Are you willing to serve all kinds, no matter what they look like or how rowdy and rough they might be?" he asked them seriously, looking them straight in the eye.

"Absolutely," Carne and Patti replied at the same time, with no hesitation what-so-ever. Zeff nodded, satisfied.

"Then if you're as good as you say you are, you're hired. Eggplant, show them around," he ordered before turning and clomping away towards the bedrooms. Scowling after him, I turned to the new guys.

"Okay, so there are a few simple rules here," I told them quickly. "Rule one is whatever Chef Zeff says goes. Number two is the customer is always right and blah, blah, blah…" I really couldn't care less about Chef Zeff's silly rules.

I led them around the ship, telling them all of their duties and where they would be sleeping and such. Both of them, Patti especially, looked terribly annoyed at having to be bossed around by a little kid. I didn't care much, I would earn their respect soon enough.

Chef Zeff had a bedroom all to himself, and you were only allowed to go in if he called you. Otherwise, you were to keep out. I had a room of my own, but it was smaller and less cluttered than his. The rest of the cooks had to share rooms. When I explained this to Patti and Carne, the exchanged scowls and groaned at the thought. I told them to get over it.

"And this is the kitchen," I finished, opening the door and showing them.

"Think it's big enough?" Patti asked, slightly sarcastic and looking around the large kitchen. I ignored his comment. "And what are you supposed to be doing, little boy?"

"First off, my name is Sanji," I told them with a slight growl. "Second, I am a cook as well, working here just as long as the old man, so you should really show me some respect. And I also do everything the old man is too lazy to do."

"You shouldn't talk bad about the Chef like that," Carne warned. "Who knows what he would do to you if you talked like that about him. Especially to his face. He seems dangerous."

I scoffed. "I talk like that to him all the time," I replied. "He already knows exactly how I feel about him." I turned and stalked off, leaving them to stare after me in slight confusion. Yeah, they were going to need some getting used to. It was hard to believe that either of them were actual cooks, but looks could be deceiving. Most of the time…

Patti and Carne were extremely competitive. As soon as they started working with us they started trying to outdo each other, especially when Chef Zeff was around. They argued constantly, and whenever I told them to put a sock in it, they would argue even more. Patti especially constantly tried to show me up as the better cook. But I was sure that I could always outdo him. It was hard earning respect when you were only eleven, but these two were especially difficult.

Eventually, Patti took "The customer is always right" to the next level.

"The customer is KING!" he exclaimed one morning, bursting into the kitchen. "They are the blood and life of the restaurant, so what they say goes."

"Who's the idiot who told you that?" I asked, not looking up from my station. "They're not welcome here if they're willing to waste food willy nilly."

Patti blinked at me. "That's a lot of talk coming from such a little shrimp," he growled. "What do I care about what they eat and what they don't eat? It's none of our business as long as the customer is happy."

"Nobody will be happy if they eat the kind of slop you're cooking," I retorted. He glared at me.

"You lookin' for a fight?" He snarled.

"Break it up, you two," Zeff growled, clomping over to us. "And get back to work. Lunch rush is coming and we need everyone focused."

"Then can you please tell the shrimp he doesn't know what he's talking about?" Patti begged.

"The Eggplant is right," Zeff replied calmly. "Never waste food." And then he stalked off. I snickered at Patti before turning back to work. The old man and I didn't like each other, but at least I knew we could agree on one thing. Never waste food. I would never let myself forget it. Somewhere out there, there was a greedy man who thought food was nothing and threw out precious food. And somewhere, there was a starving loner. I knew what it was like, and I would not let it happen again.

Starving. The All Blue. The Baratie. And now Patti and Carne. There was no way I was going any time soon. Who cares if I couldn't stand any of them? There was no way I was going to be thrown out. I was there to stay.

The Baratie ark was and always will be my favorite ark in the One Piece series. There's just something about it. Sanji has always been my favorite character too and I'm always happy when the author reveals even a little bit more about him. I've still got a long way to go before Luffy first flies into their lives, but I hope you'll be entertained the entire way through. It's surprising how much depth so many of the characters have, even the ones who aren't major.

Once again, I am so sorry for how long it took to update this. I've been in a creative slump and my life has been super busy and junk. Please read and review and I'll see that the next chapter comes up much faster.