She stands outside his door and she hopes she's given him enough time to grieve, but she needs support too, and even though she loved him differently she still loved him.

She almost can't bring herself to knock but she needs this more than anything so she lifts her hand and raps three times against his door.

He opens it and his eyes are rimmed red from tears and there are bags under them and he looks as if he's caved in on himself, but it's him, it's him (almost him, never him).

"What's wrong?" His voice is hoarse from lack of use, and she almost wants to laugh, because really, what isn't wrong?

"Please," she stammers. She glances furtively around and then ducks under his arm into his dark room.

His eyes dark, he closes the door.

She tries once again.

"I need... I just... I have to..." she looks him in the eyes and prays he will understand. "Please. I need to say goodbye."

He seems confused, but then understanding passes over his face. His mouth opens and closes, once, twice...

And then he nods.

She steps forward and he's his brother, the one she loved, the one who left her, and she's not sure if she wants to hug him or hit him so she settles for running her hands through his hair and burying her face in his neck. Her tears soak his shirt but he just wraps his arms around her because he's tired of being himself, so what was the harm in being someone else for a change?

"I miss you," she whispers before bringing her lips to his.

"I love you," she tells him, and he goes to recapture her lips but not before his name escapes and explodes in the air around them, "Fred."

(He used to resent his brother for having her but now he resents him for leaving her, but more than anything he resents himself for holding her and pretending that it's him she wants.)