I Missed Alice

-

Sometimes, when the Spook used to go out, Alice and I would just talk. It was nice, just the two of us, in the Spook's house in Chipenden. It made me think of the words Alice had said to me right after we'd defeated the Bane.

"One day this house will belong to us, Tom. Don't you feel it?"

I had shrugged and told her that no one could predict the future. But in the moments where we just sat and talked, I thought I could feel the truth in what she said. I couldn't imagine being at Chipenden without Alice.

But now Alice was gone, sent away to Pendle by the Spook. I couldn't help feeling angry with him, especially after all Alice had done for us. I knew he thought what she did was wrong, but she'd done it with the best of intentions, hadn't she? Alice didn't want to be bad. That much, I knew. No matter what the Fiend said, Alice tried to be good. Part of me wondered if there was some truth to the Fiend's words. Had Alice tried to fight the dark for me? A part of me liked the thought. But the Fiend was the devil made flesh, and he'd do anything to trick me. I couldn't trust what he'd said, not one bit of it.

Still...the memory of Alice's kissed still burned on my lips, haunting me and making me ache deep down as I recalled that moment. I know she hadn't wanted to leave. I didn't want her to leave either, and it hurt me to watch her go. I was afraid of what would happen to her in Pendle. I was afraid that she'd get hurt, or worse, end up belonging to the dark.

I was back in Chipenden with the Spook, again, but the house felt empty. I had become so accustomed to the scratch of Alice's pen on paper as she copied the Spook's texts. No longer did we share secret smiles while we ate, despite the Spook's disapproving glares. The smiles had been worth the glares, I think. I missed her company. I missed Alice.

I didn't know if seeing Alice in the mirror helped or worsened my situation. It was a relief to see her face in the mirror, and I longed to fog up the glass and write her a message, to see if she was okay. But I restrained myself, instead throwing my body on my bed and facing away from the mirror, to resist the temptation. I kept my promise to the Spook, however badly it hurt me to ignore Alice that way. Everyone kept telling me, "Alice would do anything for you." Even my master. It made guilt squirm I my stomach. Why couldn't I do anything for her?

On some level, it irritated me, the way the Spook called Alice, "the girl." She had a name, after all. I resented that he was keeping Alice away. Maybe she was the Fiend's daughter, but I knew Alice. I knew she wouldn't try to hurt me.

But then I remembered Alice using the Dread. I had been frightened, then. I had thought that she was a real malevolent witch. Maybe Alice would go bad.

The Spook didn't trust her, and he never had, maybe for good reason. I wondered what my Mam would think of Alice, now. Would she still think that Alice had a chance?

With all of these thoughts swirling in my head, I sighed wearily. I felt conflicted. Was Alice part of the light, or did she belong to the dark? Couldn't she just belong...somewhere in the middle? And what of the prophecy Tibbs had given? The Spook didn't put much faith in any prophecy, but my experience with Mam's own visions of the future made me wary. I whispered the words of the prophecy softly to myself, my insides tightening uncomfortably.

"I see a girl, soon to be a woman. The girl who will share your life. She will love you, she will betray you, and finally she will die for you." Would Alice betray me? Would she die for me? I couldn't bear the thought of it.

I glanced down at my left arm, my eyes resting on the four, crescent scars.

"You're mine, Tom!" Alice had shouted to me. She had put a brand on me. But now, no other witch could ever try and control me. I wondered if Alice could control me now. I didn't feel like I was being controlled. I mostly felt sad, remembering Alice and the times we'd shared.

"What are you using," I'd asked when she held my left hand in her own after the Fiend had failed to find me the first time. "Fascination or glamour?" I had asked, because the Spook wouldn't have liked me holding hands with Alice. But it had felt nice, and I hadn't wanted to move. Alice said I could if I'd wanted to, but I didn't. I liked staying where I was. She had smiled funnily at me and answered, "Both," in a way that I knew she was only teasing. It still made me smile, nonetheless.

I smiled softly again, brushing my fingertips over my scars. I missed Alice.

Suddenly, there was a soft knock at the door, and the Spook entered my room.

"Alright there, lad? You hardly ate at dinner. You don't want to put the boggart off it's cooking."

"Sorry," I apologized. My mind had been swimming with my conflicted thoughts, and I had lost my appetite.

"Anything bothering you?" he asked kindly. I looked at him for a long moment. How could I explain to him how I missed Alice? He didn't like to hear about her, and he'd only tell me off. So I shook my head and shrugged.

"I'm just tired. I think I'll go to sleep now." He stared hard at me, and I thought maybe he realized I wasn't telling him the truth, but he let it go and shrugged in response, closing the door behind him.

I lay in my bed for a long time later, unable to sleep still, thoughts of Alice spinning in my head. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw my mirror begin to lighten, and I sat up, watching as her face became visible. It was as though my thoughts of her had brought her to me. I watched as she breathed on the mirror until it fogged, and tried to decipher her backwards message.

"moT, uoy ssim I."

I miss you, Tom. I promised the Spook I wouldn't contact her. But I couldn't help as I smiled sadly and waved to her, nodding. I pointed to myself, and held up two fingers. Me too. I hoped she understood.

It seemed like she did, because she smiled at me, and her image began to fade away. I watched as it darkened again, and I only saw my reflection in it. I sighed heavily, laying myself back down.

Her smile had been worth any reprimand the Spook would give me if he found out. I missed Alice.

-

A/N: This is just a one-shot. I love The Last Apprentice, and I've been rereading it again. I can't wait for the sixth book! I apologize to anyone who will get an e-mail because they have me on Author Alert. I realize, you're probably all waiting for me to update one of my three OTHER stories. That's why this is just a one-shot, though I might make a short story for The Last Apprentice later on. As for my other stories, I've been rather busy, and quite a bit writers-blocked as of late. I'm so sorry. I'll try and update soon. In the meantime, I hope everyone enjoys this. Please review as well!