Chapter 5

A/N: I'm baaaaaaack! Yes, I know it's been a hideously long time, but I just had no idea how to write the really, really awkward scene that's going to come next.

They came gliding swiftly between the trees: three of them, expressions wary, hands ready, eyes trained on Jasper and Carlisle. Trying to read the situation, Jasper decided that they were probably mates. The male was lean and rangy, with blond hair tied back in a ponytail and a few days' worth of stubble on his chin. He would never have known, on the morning when he woke up for the last time and decided not to shave, that he would be keeping those beginnings of a beard for the rest of his existence. His eyes were deep burgundy and slightly sardonic. His companion – mate – was full-lipped and proud-eyed, her white skin rendered even paler by the tumble of flame-auburn hair surrounding her face. The last had to be a tag-along, following them out of convenience. Jasper stood a little behind Carlisle, his stance carefully neutral, and took in his first sight of Northern vampires. Physically they were exactly what Carlisle had described – the only scars he could see were a couple of rings of toothmarks on the forearm of the leading male and a silvery line across the woman's cheek, and no snarling newborns appeared behind them. Travelling with just two other people in the South was unheard of, unless one was defeated and fleeing. But the emotions he felt from them were just as wary and calculating as he would have expected.

Maybe Carlisle's cheerful chance meetings existed in the far North, but this wasn't it. He didn't trust these vampires one bit.

There was a pause as the two vampires halted and stared at Jasper and Carlisle, sizing them up. Jasper slowly curled and uncurled his fingers, trying to control his feelings as the tension mounted. Then Carlisle drew an audible breath and stepped forward.

'I am pleased to meet you,' he said, spreading his arms in a gesture that simultaneously conveyed welcome and showed his hands to be empty and unthreatening. 'Ah – my name is Carlisle, and my companion is Jasper. Do we find ourselves in your territory?'

The leading male vampire blinked, then relaxed and answered.

'No, we were just passing through.'

'Nomads, like ourselves?' Carlisle was clearly about to strike up a pleasant conversation, but somehow Jasper couldn't keep his mouth shut.

'Heading South?' he asked.

An innocuous enough question, but one laden with implications. And Jasper's tone made it clear that he intended every implication to be felt.

The other vampire looked at him coldly. 'Yes,' he said.

'We had heard that things were becoming quieter,' the female said. She had a high voice which was currently as soft and cold as winter snow. She glared at Jasper, and he could sense that her feelings for her mate must be very strong, and that she was angry with Jasper for his implied insult. 'Some places up North are getting a little crowded with people trying to avoid any fighting.'

'Things getting quieter, huh?' Jasper echoed. 'Did a Southerner tell you that? Well, maybe it is.' He paused. 'By our standards.'

And he had just admitted to being from the South. Wonderful. Beside him, he could sense waves of anxiety rolling off Carlisle, mingled with exasperation. The second emotion might once have made him angry, but right now he found it endearing. He was ruining Carlisle's diplomatic introductions.

But now the second male stepped forward with a warm smile.

'Our James is indefatigable,' he said, laying a hand on the first vampire's shoulder. 'What with the situation in the South being so unstable, everybody in the North treads on eggshells when they meet, and he's tired of it. He is dragging us down into more challenging territory and you…' he ran an eye over Jasper and Carlisle… 'it seems you are dragging this one up away from it.'

'Yes,' Carlisle agreed. 'We only recently met, actually, but from what I've gathered it seems he has been in a scrap or two. We are in search of somewhere a little more peaceful.' He smiled two, and turned to the first vampire. 'James, I believe you were called?' he said. 'Allow me to introduce myself and my companion, and please forgive me for not doing so before. I am called Carlisle, and this is Jasper.'

'That's right; I am called James,' the other vampire said, and then suddenly he smiled widely. Jasper stared. He couldn't feel any change in the vampire's – James' – emotions, but suddenly his whole demeanour was warm and friendly. 'My companions are called Victoria and Laurent.'

'Laurent?' Carlisle asked. 'You must be from France!'

'Yes,' Laurent agreed, smiling. 'And I think, by your accent, that you are from England?'

'Yes,' Carlisle admitted. 'I never did quite manage to adopt the American way of speaking. I studied in your country of birth for quite some time, you know. And you, James? America?'

'Canada.'

Carlisle shook his head apologetically. 'Frightfully sorry. I really should have learned the difference in accent by now, but it still escapes me.'

James showed, by a solicitous gesture of the hand, that it was quite alright.

Ten minutes later, they were seated in a ring in the middle of the clearing, talking pleasantly. Carlisle had completely ignored Jasper's lack of enthusiasm. Maybe he should have been more vocal in his complaints – he tended to forget that not everybody could read emotions – but then again, what could he have said? He had no reasonable objection. Laurent seemed as diplomatic as Carlisle himself. Carlisle and James were chatting away like old friends, comparing their lives as nomads around America. The woman hadn't said much, but she hadn't done anything to make him dislike her either. Maybe he was just being a prejudiced, hung-up Southerner.

Jasper shook his head. He didn't like these vampires. Laurent's smile was empty. Jasper could tell that all his decisions would be made with the same aim that made him follow this coven; convenience. James' feelings didn't match his words. He was laughing with Carlisle now, swapping stories of encounters with French Canadians while Laurent feigned outrage beside him, but his emotions were cold, conniving, calculating…but calculating what? Meanwhile, the woman was as fierce and as featureless as a piece of hot metal. All Jasper could get of her was hostility and devotion to the male at her side. But then, he thought gloomily, maybe he was being paranoid. After all, those things were fairly typical of vampires. Wariness, analysis, obsession. That was what drove them. He just didn't like vampires much, that was the truth of it. Ironic, since he was one of them. But then again, he didn't much like himself.

'How were you changed?' James was asking.

'I was about twenty-three,' Carlisle answered. He seemed to have relaxed beyond mere courtesy; his smile was genuine. Jasper gritted his teeth. 'My father sent me out witch-hunting. "Son," he said, "bring back a vampire." I don't think he was anticipating that I would be the vampire.'

'You hunted vampires while you were still human?' James exclaimed. Something shot through Jasper, and he realised that he was jealous. He had asked Carlisle that question right before these other vampires arrived. Was Carlisle about to have exactly the same conversation with a complete stranger that he had just had with Jasper? Did he go around spilling his guts to every vampire he met who was patient enough to listen?

Actually, considering his loneliness, that seemed very probable.

He missed Carlisle's response in the midst of his own thoughts, but whatever it was, it made both him and James laugh exuberantly, while Laurent chuckled more quietly and Victoria's lips twitched. And then, in the midst of his laughter, James' hand came down on Carlisle's leg.

Jasper's mouth fell open. His eyes flashed to James' face. Was he reading too much into it? Carlisle certainly didn't seem to have noticed anything amiss; he showed his customary lack of concern at having potentially dangerous vampires hanging on to parts of his body. Naïve fool…but James' expression made Jasper sure he wasn't imagining things. He looked straight into Carlisle's face as Carlisle began to speak again, and, as he listened, his eyes slid slowly down Carlisle's neck and shoulder to his bare forearm. Jasper pulled his mouth shut, as bewildered as he was – inexplicably – furious. Didn't James have a mate? There was no guilt or confusion in him, just interest…thoughtfulness…maybe a little amusement…it puzzled Jasper. Was this the way vampires did love? He didn't know.

He turned, looking into the red-head's face instead. He was sure her first feelings had been those of a mate. Wasn't she jealous? By his experience, she ought to have been tearing Carlisle apart by now. She was watching him and James talk even more raptly than she was – Jasper noticed how most of the conversation had died away, just him, Victoria and Laurent listening while James and Carlisle spoke more and more exclusively to one another – and there didn't seem to be anything coming from her except the same obsessive focus and a wary antagonism much like his own. He dug deeper. Ah yes, there was something…a little taste of bitter resignation, carefully supressed. But what was this? Jasper grappled with his past experience, struggling to comprehend. He had never heard of a vampire cheating on his mate before.

Then Victoria turned to meet his look. She stared hard into his face for a moment, and suddenly Jasper felt that, despite her clear hostility, they understood one another better than anyone else in the clearing. Which was odd, since he didn't really understand himself. But, when they turned back to watch James and Carlisle, Jasper could almost hear their mutual sigh of impatience.

James had shifted so that they were touching and shoulder and knee; he was moving his hand to illustrate some point he was making. Jasper snapped his eyes to Carlisle's face, trying to see if he was in on it too. What was the point, Jasper wondered, of begging me to join his vegetarian lifestyle, if he's going to take up with the first new vampire who comes along…? He supposed that in theory there was no reason why all five of them couldn't join together, but…he didn't want to. James was like a stone underfoot, twisting; Jasper didn't trust him an inch. But Carlisle was still as open as ever. Watching him, Jasper was sure that he wasn't flirting; his face was open and engaged, nothing more. Oblivious fool. Couldn't he see how James was looking up at him from beneath his eyelashes, laughing unduly at every triflingly witty remark? Now that he came to think of it, it seemed out of character for Carlisle not to notice that the rest of them were being thoroughly left out of the conversation, even though Jasper had never seen him interact with others before. James must have captured his attention very strongly indeed. Slick bastard, he found himself thinking angrily. What was going on beyond that wide, affected smile? Then James' hand brushed Carlisle's as he spoke, and Jasper let out a hiss.

James paused, going quite still, and then turned slowly to look at him. Jasper felt the tiny hairs on the back of his neck and hands standing up. James put his head a little on one side, and at last his expression seemed to match up to the emotions Jasper could sense. Conniving. But what was he after?

Laurent, who a moment ago had seemed completely bored, looked up. His face was suddenly taught, wary.

'James?' he said.

Every nerve in Jasper's body was jangling.

Carlisle leaned forward. 'I'm sorry,' he said, his polite tone thoroughly out of keeping with their three-way staring match. 'My companion sometimes finds it hard to be around strangers. I hope you will not –'

James turned back to face him. Jasper couldn't see the look he gave Carlisle, but it was enough to make the smile slide off Carlisle's face like water off feathers.

'James,' Laurent said again.

James lunged for Carlisle's throat.

Laurent's instinctive reaction was exactly what Jasper had expected. He flung himself backwards away from the fight. No loyalty there. But Victoria surprised him. Though James' attack seemed to be without rhyme or reason, she leapt instantly into the fray.

She astonished Jasper only slightly less than he astonished himself.

As she moved, he moved, skidding to a halt almost at the feet of the two struggling males, putting himself between them and her. Victoria crashed right into him, and he seized her by the arm and waist, flinging her away from him as far as he could. He had to get her out of the fight for a moment, because he could tell without even looking that Carlisle was going to need him.

The fighting instinct Jasper had been trying to tap into in their practises was wide awake, but there was no way he was going to make a match for a practised fighter. He was struggling fiercely, head thrown back, one hand twisted in James' hair and the other clawing at his shoulder as James lunged for his throat. Jasper grabbed James from behind and dragged him backwards; there was a horrible screeching sound as his locked teeth clean through stony flesh. Carlisle stumbled as James was pulled off him, one hand going to the side of his neck where the ragged wound had just been torn; he was wild-eyed, his shirt in ribbons. For a second Jasper had the upper hand; he had both arms around James, locked in place. Then Victoria came pelting at him from the side.

Fool! Jasper felt like screaming as he threw himself to the ground and slipped from between them. God-damned idiot! Refuse to learn to fight, drag us into consorting with crazy Northerners and then leave me to clean up your mess! He thought he could handle a two on one fight, but if Laurent joined in they were done for.

He kept in front of Carlisle. Victoria came at him again. She was vicious, all teeth and nails, but reckless. He was the stronger; he dodged her savage attack and landed a heel in her gut, knocking her backwards and whirling as James struck at his other flank. He would have to finish this quickly. James went for his face: fast, cruel, cunning. Jasper let all his skill in fighting flood him. He snarled, snapped when the hands came at him; the resistance of skin and bone was exhilarating against his teeth; he got a hold on James, twisted, smashed an elbow to his face. James was knocked clean to the ground; he rolled to his feet, more of a scramble than a spring. Jasper roared. He was ready for James' next attack, seeing it almost before it happened – and so, when it didn't happen, he felt for a moment as though he had gone blind.

The fight seemed to stop with a physical lurch. Laurent had pinned James' arms to his sides and was holding him back.

'Victoria!' he barked. The female had looked ready to fling herself at Jasper again without support, but at Laurent's shout she stopped, hissing.

Jasper could hear Carlisle panting behind him. He crouched and spread his hands, snarling softly and with all the menace he could muster. Laurent looked nakedly terrified: of him, but also of James. Jasper noticed that he had only intervened when James had lost the upper hand – when Laurent could claim to have saved him from being killed by a more dangerous fighter. Jasper stared at James, wide-eyed behind his snarl. What was he?

'I'm sorry,' Laurent whispered. Jasper growled again and leaned forward; Laurent pulled James a corresponding step back. 'He will not attack again. Please, there is no need…'

Jasper felt a hand on his shoulder and whirled with a roar. He found himself face-to-face with Carlisle. The other vampire was breathing through his teeth, and still had a hand pressed to his bite wound, yet somehow his face was still free of the stress and savagery that were marking all theirs to some extent. He still looked human.

'Jasper…' he said.

Jasper knocked his hand away with force that would have broken a human finger.

'Don't tell me what to do!' he snarled.

'We'll leave now,' Laurent breathed. 'Let us go our separate ways in peace.'

'Peace?' Jasper shrieked. 'Give me one reason why I shouldn't slaughter him now!'

'If you tried,' Victoria said, 'you would be killed yourself!' She slid into a crouch in front of James and Laurent, mirroring Jasper's protective stance.

Jasper sighed. He knew that he couldn't kill all three with them; certainly not while keeping himself between them and Carlisle. There was no choice, really.

'We will remain in this clearing,' he said. 'I must attend to my companion. It is you who will go on your way, Laurent, and if I can still smell your foul coven on the wind within the next hour, I will kill you all. Now get out of here. Run fast.' He added a little pulse of fear at the end of his statement, and Laurent jumped another step backwards, releasing James.

'We will go,' he said. 'We will leave at once, I promise you.' He swallowed, beginning to back away steadily. 'Come, Victoria, James. James.'

James was standing where Laurent had left him. He stared straight into Jasper's eyes with an expression of smug satisfaction, as though he was thoroughly pleased with what had happened. As though he had somehow won against Jasper, despite the fact that Jasper had been about to wipe the floor with him. Jasper gave another low growl, and James laughed softly. Jasper's growl rose and became a furious snarl.

One corner of James' mouth pulled up in a smirk, and he slung an arm around Victoria's shoulders and began to saunter after Laurent. Victoria turned her face coldly away from him, glancing over her shoulder to send Jasper and Carlisle a look of pure loathing. Anger, then, but no shift in loyalty. She turned away, falling into step with James.

Venom welled in Jasper's mouth. He wanted nothing more than to launch himself at their retreating backs.

He didn't relax until he could no longer hear the sound of their footfalls. Then he straightened up with a deep sigh.

'Jasper…' Carlisle said. Jasper turned and hit him hard across the face.

'Idiot!' he shouted.

Carlisle stumbled backwards. 'Jasper –'

Jasper grabbed his shoulders, pushing him backwards. 'What do you think you were doing?' He slammed Carlisle back against a thick oak tree on the last word.

'Would you calm down?' Carlisle snapped a little, pushing Jasper's hand away. Jasper slapped his hand down and shoved him backwards again. 'You don't get it, do you? You can't be indignant and tell me that my behaviour is a bit off. I could kill you.'

'Why would you kill me?' Carlisle asked, and Jasper was struck again by his ability to stand up for himself. Just not physically. He wasn't a fighter, but he was no coward either, Jasper had to grudgingly admit. 'You just risked your life trying to save me.'

Jasper sighed, cooling down just a little. 'Alright,' he grunted. 'Fair point. In this particular case there's no point in me killing you but…but wake up. We're not humans, alright, whatever you try to pretend. We don't have policemen, we don't have laws, we don't have gods. We just have our teeth. So learn to use yours. And don't get into conversations with strange vampires.'

'Look,' Carlisle sighed, tugging Jasper's hand off his shoulder again, 'your experience has taught you to mistrust other vampires, and I respect that, but my experience has taught me that when you meet nomads you should be polite and friendly. And they were nomads. They came from the North. Honestly, have you ever seen anything like that before?'

'No,' Jasper admitted. 'I have no idea why they attacked. I could have told you they were bad news though.'

'Could you?' Carlisle met his eyes properly for the first time. 'Jasper, I would have listened to you if you had told me you didn't want to linger, you know.'

'I was telling you the whole time!'

'What? No you weren't.'

Jasper huffed. 'Oh yeah. I forgot you can't read emotions. I really, really didn't like them. It was instinctive.'

'I didn't much like the look of them to begin with either, but James became so friendly after the first few moments. It is only natural for our kind to mistrust one another a little at first, after all…'

'Mmm.' Jasper frowned. 'He liked you.'

Carlisle looked down at himself. 'He bit me.'

Jasper pulled himself together and turned brisk. 'I've got to look at those,' he said. 'Sit down.'

Carlisle slid down the tree so that he was sitting at its base with his back against the trunk, and Jasper crouched down facing him. He reached forward – carefully, because he was used to being bitten for his pains when he had tried to attend to injured newborns – and pulled the shredded fabric of his shirt aside to examine his shoulder.

'This shirt is fairly well ruined, at any rate,' Carlisle said. The right-hand side and body were holding together fairly well, but the left shoulder was rent with tooth- and nail-marks. 'I will have to obtain another one from somewhere before we can show our faces in public again.'

Jasper wanted to ask what the hell it mattered, but instead he found himself carefully undoing the buttons instead of just ripping it as he normally would have done. He pulled the side of the shirt away to inspect the damage. There were white nail-scrapes all down Carlisle's flanks and across his belly, but nothing that had broken the skin; it was his chest and shoulder on the left side that had taken the worst of it. Jasper probed the bites carefully with his fingers, then tilted Carlisle's head back to examine the wound at his throat. Carlisle hissed a little as the movement stretched the skin. Clearly the venom was starting to sting.

'Wow,' Jasper said, grinning. 'People won't wonder what you're doing in company with a ruffian like me anymore. It's just a shame he didn't mark your face at all.'

Carlisle gave a tense chuckle.

'What a mess,' Jasper muttered. 'He really got his teeth into you, didn't he? Well, looks like they were mostly clean in-and-out, apart from this one on your neck where I pulled him off you. Sorry about that. Ripped a bit.'

'I'll live.'

'Worse luck,' Jasper sighed philosophically. 'Sorry, just thinking out loud. Maybe you quite enjoy life; I don't know. Anyway, you'll get a bit of a raised scar there, I should think. The rest of them'll just leave white marks. Right, I'm going to try and suck some of the venom out now.'

'Does that actually help?' Carlisle asked, and Jasper guessed that he was trying to keep himself distracted from the pain.

'Seeing that our mouths are already full of venom?' Jasper said, tipping Carlisle's head carefully back again. 'I think so…if there's a higher concentration of venom in the wound than in your mouth, or something, because you always produce more when you're fighting…who knows? It feels like it helps though. Takes your mind off it.'

He pressed his lips down on the worst bite. Carlisle's breath caught, and Jasper couldn't blame him. It was only natural to feel a little nervous about mouths near the jugular after an experience like that. Well, he thought, smiling a little, better late than never.

He sucked hard for a few seconds, trying to keep any venom he himself was producing at the back of his mouth, sucking poison out rather than putting more in.

'Better?' he asked.

'Um…I think so…'

Jasper patted him on the shoulder and sucked again. He was feeling much calmer, letting his mind come down from the high of fighting and bend to the quiet task of helping a comrade. All the same, the point between his shoulder blades was starting to itch.

'Watch my back, will you?' he asked, and Carlisle laughed quietly. He felt remarkably calm, all things considered, and rather than infuriating Jasper, it soothed him. He brushed Carlisle's hair, trying to calm him further so that he could pick it up second-hand. He breathed in deeply against his neck, ignoring the smell of vampire, which made him feel nervous and sick to his stomach, and focussing on the parts that were purely Carlisle.

'Idiot,' he muttered again, moving to Carlisle's collarbone. Some of the bite-marks were already starting to seal up on the surface, and Jasper knew he would have to work quickly. He knew what it was like to have a cut close with venom still inside it. He'd scratched some open again himself in the past, and he didn't much feel like a night spent sitting on Carlisle's hands, though when he thought about it he couldn't come up with anything better to do with his time.

'What have I done?' Carlisle sighed.

'Oh, you just are. I can't believe you never contemplate killing me, ever.'

'What would be in it for me?' Carlisle asked, making his voice deliberately baffled.

Jasper shrugged. 'Dunno.'

'Far more trouble than it's worth, I'd say, having seen you fight today.' Carlisle sucked in his breath as Jasper turned his attention to a particularly deep bite. There was a moment's silence, and then he spoke again. 'Ah, Jasper?'

'Mm-hm?'

'I'd like to…thank you, for, you know, er, leaping to my defence.'

'Oh. Huh. You're welcome, I suppose.' Jasper thought Carlisle sounded overly awkward, but then again, perhaps they were rather closely intertwined by English standards.

'Honestly, thank you. You were very prompt.'

'Years of practise.'

'Mmm. I wasn't sure if you would, you know, seeing that you seem to find me a lot of trouble.'

'You are a lot of trouble,' Jasper agreed, placing a hand on Carlisle's flank to steady himself as he moved lower down his chest, 'but it's not as if I have anything better to do with my life than look after you.' Carlisle took a rather unsteady breath. 'Pain getting to you?'

'I'm sorry? Oh, no, not really…stings a little.'

'I know,' Jasper said with a sympathetic grimace, and looked up at Carlisle…straight into his eyes.

Ever since he had joined Carlisle, they had been hunting almost every day, to get Jasper's hand in and, he suspected, to stop him from getting thirsty so that he wouldn't be tempted to revert to human blood. His eyes had been turning slowly from red to amber, and Carlisle's had remained bright, buttery gold.

Until the bears. They had provided a rich, satisfying feed, and for several days they had gone without hunting. And now Carlisle's eyes were a colour he had never seen them before: a deep golden-brown, darkening in the middle like toffee.

Jasper stared into them, and memories hit him with the force of a flash-flood. Copper pans, the smell of burnt sugar, fingers singed on hot metal. Living as a child on his parents' farm, making toffee in the kitchen with his mother and his friends and…had there been a brother or sister? He couldn't remember.

He sucked in his breath. Fallen pears fermenting in the summer heat, saddle-soap on leather. And then somehow his hand was round the back of Carlisle's neck, and he was kissing him as though he could never let him go.

'What the –'

He was aware that somewhere outside his haze Carlisle was struggling, trying to pull away. It was so out of step with his own mood that he ignored it.

'Carlisle…' he groaned, kissing messily, open-mouthed to gasp in his scent, winding a hand into his bright gold unstained hair –

'Jasper.' Hands planted themselves squarely against his chest and pushed; forced away from Carlisle's lips, Jasper shook his head blearily, trying to make sense of him, and, more to the point, himself.

'I…' Carlisle wore an expression which was trying to be indignant but kept lapsing into bewildered. 'What?'

'I…' Jasper faltered, 'I don't…' His hand was still in Carlisle's hair. He brought it down to rest against his cheek, which, he was pleased to discover, felt like the right thing to do. He gazed into Carlisle's face. The hair and eyes reminded him of melting butter and made him feel the same way. 'You're beautiful,' he said without thinking.

'Jasper, please.' Carlisle pushed his hand away and stood up, pulling his shirt around himself and moving away. Jasper's mind gave a lurch and managed to catch up.

'You're…you're angry?' he asked, getting up too and turning round.

'No, no, I'm not angry.' Carlisle shook his head, pushing his hair back distractedly. 'It's…it's such a little thing, really.'

'Carlisle,' Jasper said again. He hadn't intended any particular intonation, but it must have come out a little too heated, because Carlisle took a step backwards and hunched his shoulders defensively.

'I'm sorry if I have misjudged the situation,' he said stiffly. 'I did not realise that you were…that you…'

'Me neither,' Jasper said with a slightly hysterical laugh. 'But Carlisle…' He reached out a hand.

'Stop.'

Jasper sighed. 'I thought you wanted to travel together,' he said.

'As companions!'

'We're vampires. We're already damned, if that's what you're worried about; does it make that much difference?'

'It's not something I'm comfortable with!' Carlisle snapped, turning away. He walked briskly down the clearing away from Jasper, though Jasper knew he would be back before long. And didn't that sum it up perfectly? In the end, none of their kind could get away from the things they wanted to escape, because when you were immortal and damned-nigh invincible, the world became so terribly small.

He slumped back against the tree with a frustrated sigh. It seemed to him that nothing had changed, except perhaps for the worst. He liked – liked, if that was the word – Carlisle Cullen, many times more than he had done, but he was more angry with him than he had been before as well, so he supposed it all balanced out. And more than that, he was doubly furious with himself. First the inability to eat humans, he thought angrily, and now the inability to fall for a suitable vampire. What is wrong with me?

A/N: *Is a massive Carlisle fangirl* Haha, it was James! I'm afraid Carlisle is going to get chewed up an awful lot in this fic, because that's how I like to treat the boys I'm a fan of. As of right now, he's all twitchy about Jasper kissing him because he's a Christian and stuff. I don't mean to imply that all Christians are homophobic (heck, I'm a Christian and I'm writing this); I just think that at the time Carlisle was human the concept of homosexuality would have been so off his radar that he would be totally freaked by it. So yeah. Good luck, Jasper.

As for James' INSANE behaviour…well, since when did he ever need an excuse to bite nice people? What was going through his head will be properly explained in later chapters, but first I need to get some Jasper/Carlisle going.

I thought this chapter was difficult? The next one is probably going to be doubly so. OTL.