To Be As Strong

Jazzbo22

Jazzbo22 hotmail . com

Cloud's dream was to join SOLDIER. He didn't anticipate meeting Sephiroth or Zack, or the unexpected emotions he would feel for them.

SephirothxCloudxZack, angst, language, lemon, anal

A/N: Soooo, this fic was posted ages ago on but I had taken it down to rewrite. Hopefully you like what I've done with it. Just so you know, this doesn't take Crisis Core into account. The idea of this story came ages before Crisis Core, Advent Children, Dirge of Cerberus, etc, etc. I guess I'll say I took creative liberties. As always, reviews are appreciated. Thanks for reading.

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Chapter One

Cloud hadn't expected Midgar to be so big. Sure, he had seen the pictures in the SOLDIER brochures, looked up their website on the library computer, but this – whoa, he could get lost in there! All the plates, the different levels to the city…it was amazing. He had made it from Nibelheim to Kalm, where a local bus was taking all the new Shinra cadets to Midgar for another year of combing out the SOLDIER hopefuls. This was his year. He was sixteen, he had been working out, and he wanted a major change. He wanted to be strong, he wanted to be a hero. He wanted SOLDIER. Everything about it was appealing – the training, the publicity, the reputation, and…the General. God, to be Sephiroth. Just to meet him! Cloud felt his stomach lurch in nervousness.

There were sixty or so other boys on the bus with him, looking to be around his age, up into their early twenties. Cloud wanted SOLDIER this year. To be twenty, and still hoping for it? He wouldn't settle for that.

The Shinra bus took a small detour through the slums before taking a bridge onto the higher plates. Cloud had read that the SOLDIER barracks, training grounds, and cadet housing were all separate from the Shinra Headquarters. He probably wouldn't even step into HQ's front doors until he proved himself a worthy cadet. Shinra had high standards of their military, and couldn't be bothered to waste any time with cadets that couldn't make the grade. Cloud had gone through a screening process in Junon a couple months prior, and had been one of the few chosen to continue training. He hoped in time he could prove his worthiness.

Cloud was intrigued as the bus slowed to a stop in front of what was most definitely the SOLDIER training grounds. It was closed off with high fences and barbed wire. Past the gate he could see several buildings, though from this distance he couldn't make out what they were. Some of the buildings were two or three stories high, the appearance reminding Cloud of jail. Must be student housing. No one ever splurges on the students.

Directly across was a building boasting huge glass windows, giving an overall decent view of the base. Slightly behind it was another building, a little wider, two stories. Cloud had seen its picture before – that's where the classes were held. There was an auditorium located on the main floor with a large enough capacity to hold the new cadets, as well as the SOLDIERs. It was intended for meetings, presentations, gatherings around that sort. Cloud knew there were speeches going on today – it was the official welcome ceremony for all new cadets.

In the back were the outdoor training grounds. Cloud couldn't see well from where he was seated, but there were fields as well as some indoor combat classrooms. He would be getting the tour later, knowing by the end of the day he would have a good idea where everything was.

SOLDIERs were also expected to live within the base. Their quarters were much nicer, located on the far end, looking deceptively like residential townhousing. It was imperative that they remain on base incase they were called out for a mission. One day Cloud hoped to live in his own place among the other SOLDIERs. Among Sephiroth? Did he even live there? He was a special case, was he actually on base the entire time? Cloud had always imagined him living within HQ, or having a nice apartment somewhere on the top plates of Midgar. He was the General, after all. That had to mean he was privy to some things.

Hopping off the bus, Cloud grabbed his duffel bag, digging a scrap piece of paper out of one of the front pockets. Unfolding it, he tried to make out his barely legible writing.

'Cadet Barracks, room 113'. Cloud stuffed the paper in his jeans. Hoisting his bag onto one shoulder, he left for the barracks. The residence office would have his key as well as his itinerary. He was excited to meet some real-life SOLDIERs, and if he was lucky, maybe even see Sephiroth. The man was a walking legend, the perfect warrior, and his idol.

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"What do you think? Another year of training, filled with the leaders of tomorrow?" Zack asked, pushing the blinds away from the window. From here he could clearly see the cadets bus pull in, emptying out the SOLDIER wannabes. God, they were getting smaller each year. Pretty soon it would have to be renamed, 'SOLDIER training for the kindergarteners'.

"I wouldn't go that far. Labels can be used when they start showing some potential." Sephiroth was sitting at his polished desk, idly flipping through documents. Zack guessed they were mission reports – a routine check of the reactor at Condor was met with much resistance. They couldn't even get close. Sephiroth probably couldn't be bothered to care. That stuff bored him. Unless there were actual monsters to fight, or a war broke out, he moved onto different things.

"Darmouth did some of the screening in Junon. He said there were some bright ones coming in this year, as well as some 'diamonds in the rough'. Guess that just means more work for the rest of us, eh? We're the ones that have to help them realize their potential, polish them up as SOLDIERs, then send them out to die."

"Let's not be too dramatic. You're not dead yet."

"'Cause I got you watching my six always, schnookums." Sephiroth spared him a half-hearted glare before returning to his paperwork. Sephiroth never spent much time with cadets, he worked on improving second class SOLDIERs, helping them reach first class with his expertise. For the past three years Zack had been the one to oversee the cadets initial training, so when Darmouth says 'diamonds in the rough', he understood that to mean, "Fair, you've got a helluva workload in front of ya'. Joy.

"So when do I get to be the General?" Zack asked, grinning from ear to ear. Sephiroth raised an eyebrow.

"When you kill me."

"Aw, can't you just…retire or something? Or pass it onto me?"

"…"

"You are no fun. I promise I wouldn't abuse the system." Zack knew his grin told otherwise.

"Why don't you go flex your muscles for the cadets? They're probably eager to meet someone from SOLDIER." Sephiroth offered, not even bothering to look up. Zack parked himself on his desk, leaning over to read the report he was currently engrossed in.

"Nah, I'll go when the ceremony starts. Don't want to make my studly appearance anticlimactic by meeting them beforehand." Interesting. Sephiroth was being sent out on another mission soon, to Wutai. Probably making sure they were still in their place. The war had ended badly for them, he would probably be the visual reminder not to start problems again.

"Can I help you?" Sephiroth finally looked up at Zack, setting his pen on his desk. Until Zack left, no work was going to get done.

"Just waiting for you to pay attention to me."

Sephiroth reclined in his chair, propping his boots up on his desk. Zack enjoyed the view. The great General was definitely a sight for sore eyes – the man was beautiful, but in a very manly, 'I've got a six pack not made in a gym' sort of way. He was pale, not sickly, with all that silver hair, so long…his body, his face. Yum. Sephiroth's expression had turned from mild annoyance to amusement. Probably because Zack was leaving a drool puddle in his lap.

"Are you enjoying yourself?" Sephiroth smirked, folding his arms across his chest. Zack checked his lap. Good, no drool. That would be gross.

"Why ask when you already know the answer?"

All Sephiroth had to do was extend a hand and Zack was instantly on him, covering his mouth with his own. He threaded his fingers through silver strands, attempting to kiss deeper, consuming the man under him. He tasted like hot water with a hint of caffeine, completely appealing. Zack knew he probably tasted like donuts – there wasn't enough time for a nutritional breakfast choice that morning. Sephiroth ended the kiss hastily, pulling away just enough to look Zack in the eyes.

"I'm not going to get any work done with you here."

"Maybe you should take a break then." Zack knew his efforts were futile. Sephiroth had talked about all the paperwork he had to go through today – something no SOLDIER wanted to do. It didn't help that with the added responsibility of General came even more papers. Sephiroth wasn't one to be locked up in an office all day – he should be on the battlefield.

"Ok, ok. I'm going then. Can't have you here til midnight. Am I seeing you later?" Zack didn't need a response – the predatory gleam in the General's eyes was enough.

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Cloud's dorm was small, just as he expected. He had called his side just moments before his assigned roommate walked in.

"Hey there. I'm Rob." Cloud had recognized him on the bus earlier. He looked to be only a few years older than him, with short brown hair and big hazel eyes. Cloud shook his extended hand.

"Cloud. Are you okay with me taking this side?" He gestured to the bed behind him. Rob shrugged, shaking his head.

"No, it's cool. Both are the same anyways. I'd be a bastard to make you switch when there really is no difference." Rob set his duffel on the floor, then pulled out his itinerary.

"Crazy, from now on it's just intense training. Cloud, what do you have?" Instead of reading off all his courses, Cloud just handed him his timetable. Rob scanned it quickly.

"Cool, you and I have a lot of classes together. Looks like rooming together couldn't have worked out better. Say, where are you from anyways?"

"Nibelheim, small town way far away from here."

"No shit eh? I'm from Rocket Town. Could've climbed over the mountain to see you." Rob grinned, Cloud feeling compelled to smile back. He thought the roommate situation was going to leave him with a whiny, or worse, jock asshole of a guy. Rob seemed pretty cool though.

"Yeah, I've only been in the mountains once, it's pretty dangerous." Cloud was going to leave it at that. The Nibelheim mountains held particularly painful memories for him. He had never felt more like an outcast the day Tifa had fallen, and all the townspeople blamed him…

"After the ceremony we get to start classes immediately. Isn't that cool?" Rob was far too excited. Cloud had read the brochure as well as the 'getting started' handbook – training for SOLDIER was a grueling process. Grueling probably wasn't even the right word – it was so much worse than that.

"Yeah, I guess so. It's exciting, I just don't know…"

"If you're going to hold up?" Evidently Rob had been thinking the same thing as him.

"Don't sweat it Cloud. We can't be expected to know and be able to do everything right off the bat. That's why it's called training. We just have to bust ass…everyday…right?" Cloud couldn't disagree with that. What was with him, giving up right off the bat? He was here to make a change, not whine about all the work ahead of him!

"You're right. I know I'm not really strong right now…"

"Me neither kid. That's why we're here!" As if to emphasize his point, Rob held up a scrawny arm.

"See? Not a lot of muscle! But after all this training, you are a SOLDIER."

"If you pass."

"When you pass. You see those guys? They are, like, all muscle! It's awesome! I can't wait!"

Cloud allowed himself to indulge in Rob's enthusiasm. It was exciting, what the heck was he doing being such a debbie downer? He came here for a change, and the first thing that had to go was his depressing moods. This wasn't Nibelheim anymore! No one knew him, he wasn't the freak here.

"And then we will be trained to use those kickass swords, and hand-to-hand combat, and – oh materia! I forgot about that!"

"The six am mountain runs." Cloud interjected. Rob shrugged.

"Hey, that's why we have each other. You kick my ass into gear and I'll kick yours. Sound good?" Maybe, just maybe, Cloud had found a buddy.

"Yeah, sounds good."

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Zack waited patiently as all the new cadets filed in. He sized them up as they each took a seat, knowing he had his work cut out for him. Then again, he was sure somebody said the same thing about him when he first applied for SOLDIER, and now look where he was – first class baby!

SOLDIER Andrew Darmouth – his superior, and more importantly, his close friend – was sitting beside him, doing the same thing.

"You weren't kidding about that 'diamond in the rough' comment, eh?" Zack leaned over, mumbling quietly. Andrew grinned.

"You could use the work. Your teaching skills are getting rusty." Zack scoffed.

"They are not! I will have you know that I've received positive reviews three years in a row!" He sat up straight, puffing out his chest and giving Andrew an all-too-devilish grin. Andrew rolled his eyes, chuckling.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. If you can make a few SOLDIERs out of these guys this year, I'll see about getting you a raise."

"Aww, thanks Chief. I could snuggle you up right now."

"Please don't. I think I just vomited in my mouth."

All joking aside, they sat back in their seats. It was important to look professional, and yes, a bit frightening for these cadets. Let them know that they were not about to get off easy – the authority had to smack a firm fist down. In time they'd earn their place to joke around with the SOLDIERs. For now though, there would be no casual relationships between them, as in the past that led to insubordination in the classroom. That was before Zack had become an instructor, but he knew Andrew had wasted a few good weeks instilling the respect back into the cadets. Must've been a nightmare. He didn't think anyone had graduated from that class either – what a waste of money for Shinra.

"Know what you're gonna say in your cadet address speech?" Zack asked, crossing his arms in front of his chest. Painting a faint scowl onto his face, he was sure he must've looked a little bit intimidating…right? Flexing slightly, he let his muscles speak for themselves. Sephiroth had said to show them off.

"Oh, you know, the usual bullshit. 'Strive to achieve greatness, study hard', and so on."

"So your lame ass speech from every year."

"Pretty much."

The lights had dimmed, the chitter chatter amongst the cadets falling to a silence. Zack could imagine the nervousness coursing through them. Six years ago he was in their seats. Wow, it felt like so long ago…

"Congratulations to all of you for making it here." A representative from the SOLDIER recruit program was addressing the young folk. Zack couldn't keep up with the ever-changing staff. He was out on missions all the time, when he came back, it was always someone new. Whatever.

"We are so pleased and proud that you have chosen to enrich your life with Shinra. SOLDIER is an elite military program and we are all honoured that you have decided to make it your career." Zack tuned her out. She just sounded like she was blowing hot air up all the cadets asses. Well, as soon as they got into his classroom he would be sure to burst any egos.

Finally she decided to take her seat, Zack applauding just because he was glad she was shutting her face. Another Shinra employee took the stage, reminding everyone about the SOLDIER rulebook. Great, he had to sit through this? Didn't they all get a copy of it? He doesn't need to hold their hands through it…

"As underlined, the cafeteria closes at seven pm. If you miss dinner you're going to have to wait until breakfast. I'm sure you can understand that we do not accept tardiness on base, and if you don't know about it you'll learn soon enough." Now muttering threats. Really getting them excited about starting training, eh?

After listing off more rules, he took a seat, urging all the cadets to review the rule book daily. Jeez, they get the picture. No need to shovel it all the way down their throats.

"Is Sephiroth not coming down to say a few words?" Andrew asked. Zack shook his head.

"A mission report just came in. I told him earlier he should come down for just a sec – you know how excited they would be to see him. He said he was too busy though, but he'd drop in on a training session sometime later."

"That's more intimidating then coming here and saying a few words."

"Yeah, but at the same time it's always fun to see the cadets nearly piss their pants, being so close to the almighty General and all." Zack and Andrew shared a quiet chuckle.

"And now, to close the ceremony, we'd like to invite a SOLDIER representative, First Class Andrew Darmouth, up front to share a few words of wisdom." Zack mouthed 'lame ass' at Andrew as he took the podium. 'Fuck you' Andrew mouthed back.

"It's important to send you off with a few motivational words as you get started on your training. There will be times where you have pushed your mind and your body to its extremes and you feel like giving up. Every SOLDIER has been there. The reason why we're called 'Elite' is because we've learned how to push by that and keep moving, keep getting stronger. We don't give up. Learn to make that your motto. Strive for greatness. You have to endure to enjoy the fruits of your labour. I hope to see you in the coming weeks, becoming the best you can be. Now, go work hard."

He was met with the most enthusiastic applause yet. Seems like cadets like the look of the SOLDIERs. They were probably all bored off their asses til now. Hell, Zack even felt motivated. He stood, shaking Andrew's hand.

"Good on ya man. I actually felt that this year."

"Yes, I felt like delivering it with more power."

"Yeah, I could feel the 'uumph' in it. Now we have to go work, teaching another year of wannabes."

"I can tell you love your job." Zack smiled.

"Oh, I do. It's just the first few weeks that I don't particularly fancy."

"Well then," Andrew grinned. "I won't keep you a moment longer. Go change those rocks into diamonds."