AN: This is the first of my new fic, this will be a series of unrelated one-shots based on a random word that begins with one of the letters of the alphabet. If it relates in any way to anyone else's fic, I apologize, I don't know everything that is on the Alex Rider category (as much as I would like to) so if it does seem to copy one of your own stories please tell me and I will either delete it, fix it so it isn't copied too severely or dedicate the chapter to you. If anyone has an idea I will dedicate that chapter to you too.

Disclaimer: I own nothing but the happy leprechaun that is trying to dance on my head.

Agony –

Alex Rider smiled widely at Jack, trying to make the action reach his eyes. The usual knot of weariness that rested in his stomach reared its head, growling it's annoyance at the display of emotion.

The smile faltered, and Alex bowed his head quickly so Jack would not notice.

"Have you got your Philosophy homework?" Jack asked suddenly, through a mouthful of toast.

"Yes."

"Biology, English, Drama, Chemistry?"

"Yes, yes, yes and yes." Alex murmured, flicking through his workbooks to make sure.

"Alright Al, have a nice day."

"Kay, Jack."

Another weak smile and Alex was practically running out the door.

It hurt so much to try and fake his happiness. Especially around Jack. At school there was always a crush of excited, happy, bored people whose own emotions masked Alex's own indifference and pain.

And apart from Tom, no one made any effort to try and notice the druggie.

But with Jack, when they were all alone in the house, there was nothing to shield him, nothing to hide what he was feeling or silence his screams for help, conscious pleas or not.

It was agony.

It was worse then the cuts and bruises, the scars and the broken bones he returned home with. It was worse then the mind games, the villains, MI6.

Worse then being hated, revolted, pitied.

No one understood. Jack, Tom… they gasped and glared at the superficial injuries, but when he tried to talk to them, they flinched away until he shut up, until he retreated into himself.

They wanted him to be normal, to go back to being the Old Alex. But it wasn't going to happen.

So the shield was formed and the coldness began.

The agony started.

AN: Hope you liked, next chapter – B = Bedtime.