My eyes flew open as soon as the first ray of sun came through the window. There was something wet on my arm. I frowned, then saw Nudge curled up close beside me, close enough for her open mouth to be drooling onto my wrist. I snatched my arm up and made a face. Nudge didn't so much as stir; she just kept on snoring softly and drooling contentedly. I made a mental note to check if Nudge had any dog genes somewhere in her DNA, then sat up and looked around. Sure enough, I was in the same room I had fallen asleep in. That was becoming more common lately, as opposed to the whole "waking up tied and gagged with duct tape in a crate" routine.

I must have gone back to sleep, because the next thing I knew, Gazzy was in my face shouting "PANCAKES!" at the top of his lungs.

I snapped upright, fighting the instinct that would normally have me grabbing whoever did that in a headlock. "Gaz. Not. In. The face," I ground out, blinking. The room was a lot brighter. Nudge and Angel were nowhere to be found. I felt something shift under the blanket and assumed it was Total.

I was so, so wrong.

"Jeez, smells like dirty gym socks in here," a tinny voice that reminded me of Bugs Bunny groused, and my eyes widened. I threw the blanket off my legs and glowered at the little blue robot that had frozen between my feet. I seriously did not want to know what he was trying to do. I pushed that notion so far back in my mind I would probably never find it again, then snatched up the robot before he could escape.

"I am going to pull off your arms and legs one by one, then pick off your eyes, and then sell what's left of you as an abstract sculpture. Or worse: an interesting toy for teething babies," I stated matter-of-factly.

"No! Not babies! Fat pink little blobs of certain death! I would rather be stepped on by Megatron!" the robot- Wheelie, I remembered- whined.

"Then get away from me, weirdo," I snapped. I tossed him away. He transformed into a toy monster truck in midair and hit the floor with tires spinning, and whizzed away into the back of the house.

Gazzy snickered and I gave him the glare of death.

"In case I wasn't loud enough, c'mon! Judy fixed pancakes, and not the instant kind either!" he said, running toward the kitchen area. I followed, rubbing my eyes and muttering under my breath.

Sure enough, there was a plate stacked at least two feet high with flapjacks... and there were more on the stove in progress. Angel, Nudge, Fang, Iggy, Sam and Total (who refused to eat on the floor with the other dogs) were already digging in.

"Great, not only are they going to invade our house, they're going to eat us out of it," Ronald Witwicky groused, beholding the spectacle from the doorway with a sour look.

"Oh, be positive, will ya? It's like having an extended sleepover! Only they're mutant refugees instead of Sammy's friends," Judy said briskly. She took a good look at Sam and tsked. "Mow that lawn on your face before you get fleas or something."

"Mmmm-nnngh," Sam replied through a mouthful, rolling his eyes. I couldn't help smirking. Then I saw the dark look that came over Fang's face when I smirked and I allowed it to fade, puzzled.

The next hour was spent washing up, getting dressed, and going to the local Wal-Mart for supplies like toothbrushes, extra clothes, and such. Apparently Simmons had left a credit card with the Witwickys in order to provide for us. Judy Witwicky and Nudge chattered ceaselessly while the rest of us split up to find our assigned items. My list was short and sweet: toothbrush, deoderant, assorted clothing, and sneakers. I have such a knack for quality shopping, I swear.

I picked out some generic T-shirts, a few pairs of jeans, a "cute" leather jacket (which had plenty of inside pockets for knives and grenades and stuff... heh), and a durable pair of white sneakers. When I met up with Nudge and Angel, I was unsurprised to see that Nudge had an armful of outrageously stylish clothes, while Angel had at least seven outfits decked out with ruffles, glitter and other frills. Gazzy and Iggy were all set with their guy wear, and Fang had, predictably, depleted the store's stock of black clothing. When our eyes met, his flashed in an odd way and he looked away with a set, unreadable expression.

What was with him, anyway? I thought we had already gotten past our issues.

Of course, the first thing everyone (except Fang) wanted to do once we got back to Casa Witwicky was go out to the lake so they could properly interact with Bumblebee.

"This is so cool," Gazzy said, adjusting his new sunglasses on the bridge of his nose. He had on a black T-shirt that had the black and yellow radiation symbol on it, along with the words "KEEP CLEAR" in white lettering. The appropriateness of it was enough to make me giggle. "I vote we should live here forever."

"This town is boring. Seriously. I lived here for seventeen years and nothing happened until I bought Bee. And now that the apocalypse or whatever is over with, it's mind-numbingly boring again," Sam said. "Not that I don't mind the boring. Beats getting the crap kicked outta me by Decepticons."

We were loitering around the driveway, waiting for Iggy, Fang and Nudge to come out of the house so we could leave. Nudge had disappeared into the bathroom with a packet of hair dye, so I wasn't sure how long we'd be stuck waiting. Total was running around the yard with Mojo and Frankie hot on his heels, fuming.

I heard the chorus of the Goo Goo Dolls' "Before It's Too Late" coming from Sam's pocket, then he dug out his cell phone and answered it. "Hello? Oh, Mik, hi... yeah, of course I... oh." He paused, bit his lip, then glanced at us. "Huh? No! You think I'd forget? Hel-lo? This is me we're talking about, 'Kaela, I'm totally on it. But uh, there's just one thing. No, no I can't talk about it on the phone." Another pause. "Um... sure. But I won't be coming alone. You okay with... oh, alright. I'll be there. Love you too," he added in a low, fond voice. He then ended the call and shoved his phone back into his pocket, then looked up at me with a somewhat distressed expression.

"That was my girlfriend. I'd, uh, promised her I'd come over for lunch. That was before... well, before you guys showed up," Sam admitted. "She still wants me to come, even though I won't be alone. She's cool though. She knows that sometimes some... unusual things happen."

"Is your girlfriend hot?" Gazzy asked, and Angel gave him a look. "Whaa-at?"

"She's the freakin' Warrior Goddess, man," Wheelie announced, racing out from under a nearby bush and transforming once he got close enough. He made sure to stay a few feet away from me, though. "Of course she's hot!"

"Okay, now that's just wrong. Get back inside," Sam muttered, shoving the miniature bot with his shoe.

"Hey hey! I ain't your pooch. I'm a sentient robotic organism! With feelings!" Wheelie argued. He ran over to Angel and hugged her leg. "This one understands me. Because I'm cute!"

I snorted. Sam rolled his eyes. "Yeah. Cute. It must be opposite day," he snarked.

"You're no catch yourself, squishy!"

"Okay, can it," I sighed, shaking my head. "Or I'll make good on my threat from earlier. The one about the babies?"

Wheelie mumbled something explicit and stayed firmly secured to Angel's leg. She just smiled.

Iggy came out of the door, with Fang leading him along. I walked up to meet Fang, but he just went past me. I almost said something in protest, but clammed up. Now was not the time to argue about our pseudo-quasi-relationship.

Finally Nudge emerged. She had on a glittery purple tank top, jeans with rhinestone butterflies on the sides, and sandals that showed off her orange-painted toenails. Her hair had purple streaks in it that matched her shirt, and she had on glittery eyeshadow. I resisted the urge to facepalm.

"I have a question," she asked, before I could question her fashion sense. "How are all six of us gonna fit into that car?" She pointed at Bumblebee.

"Easy," I replied, before Sam could open his mouth. "We make like sardines and go squish."

"And you're certain?"

Megatron usually didn't question his followers regarding the veracity of their claims. But given the events of late, he was feeling a bit paranoid (or maybe it was just the gaping hole in his head getting to him).

"I'm very certain," Starscream said smugly. "I've confirmed the little meatsack's identity via DNA match, as well as Itexicon records. There are a few differences, but that is only because this species is too dense to clone properly. Nothing that would be obvious to their primitive eyes, however."

He then set the cube he had been holding between thumb and forefinger on the ground. It wasn't a cube; it was a box. A crate. Starscream flicked off the crate's lid and something crawled out, a human. But not just any human. Wings extended from its slender back, and it groaned as its fragile limbs ached from the less-than-comfortable journey.

Then it looked up at Megatron with a defiant glare, and its pathetic show of bravado was so amusing that it elicited a grunt from the Decepticon leader.

"Maximum Ride," he growled in a deep voice. "Or should I say... the cheap knockoff version?"

"Go to hell," the mutant female spat.

"I'm afraid I'm already there," Megatron said dismissively. "You, however... have only just arrived."

Starscream rubbed his taloned hands together in anticipation, while the clone of Maximum Ride shuddered. Megatron nodded, and his second in command snatched up the mutant in one hand and took off toward the makeshift science wing of the underground base. The human's screams of fury and terror echoed off the rock walls, and it was all music to Megatron's audio receptors.

He then sent a private communique to Soundwave. "It's time to repay the boy and his female accomplice in kind. Initiate alpha phase of the plan. And please... remember your primary objective. You must capture the human-avians before you kill your targets. Do you understand? I no longer desire the mutants dead. They are much more valuable to me alive."

Yes, Lord Megatron, Soundwave answered, his toneless voice menacing.

Megatron reclined in his makeshift throne and imagined the sheer horrors that were about to befall the infamous bird kids. It would be glorious. It would be justice.

No one, not even the pompous Autobots, would be prepared for this next daring move.

A/N: This chappie is the prelude to a rather messy misadventure that will hopefully culminate in an epic Decepticreep beatdown. Stay tuned! :D Special thanks to all you faithful readers, you have helped keep this story alive! And remember, every time you review, Max gets a cookie. Though I've had to start giving them to Megatron lately, because all these cookies are gonna make Max fat. Megs needs love too y'know.