Hello, everybody. This was a random thought in my head after I read someone else's version of this. This is a much friendlier version of modified songs. I decided to post it even if it's not yet Christmas. But anyways, read it and do comment. It's pretty stupid at the most but please do read from beginning to end. It's very entertaining, I guess. Do not worry, I will be adding another song-slash-chapter to this.
And before I forget, I do not own the Kingdom Hearts franchise.
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Okay, Organization XII! Let's take it from the top. Xemnas, you first because you're No. 1. Okay, "Twelve Days of Christmas"! One, two, three!
Xemnas takes a deep breath and starts singing, "On the first day of Christmas, Kingdom Hearts sent to me: a wonderful cup of steaming hot tea!"
He takes a sip. "OUCH! THIS TEA IS HOT!"
After wiping his mouth with a table napkin, he says, "But it was good tea."
I told you it was hot. Steaming hot to be exact. Next time, try to be more careful with hot liquids, Xemmy.
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"On the second day of Christmas, Kingdom Hearts sent to me: a pair of huge new revolvers!" Xigbar exclaims, holding up the two revolvers.
He points them toward the ceiling. "Yeeha! I'm the new sheriff in town, boys! So stick yer hands up, Dirty Dan! And where's Pinhead Larry?" BLAM! And a portion of the ceiling comes down on his head.
"Ouch! That hurt!" Xigbar rubs his head.
Oh, Xiggy, never point up and shoot with your gun when you are in a building.
"And a wonderful cup of steaming hot tea!" Xemnas takes another sip. He doesn't burn his tongue this time.
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Xaldin clears his throat. "On the third day of Christmas, Kingdom Hearts gave to me: a Limited Edition of the Midgard Halberd!"
"Ooooh yeah! I'm cool. I'm cool. In this Organization, I rule!" He brandishes the weapon around before a lightning bolt comes out from the tip of the spearhead and hits the chandelier, causing it to crash into the middle of the room.
Xally? Remember not to play with pointed objects in the house. Geez…
"A pair of huge new revolvers!" Xigbar doesn't shoot this time.
"And a wonderful cup of steaming hot tea!" Xemnas takes another sip of his tea.
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"On the fourth day of Christmas, Kingdom Hearts sent to me: a whole new set of lab apparatus!" Vexen sang happily.
"These will be perfect replacements for the ones that Axel and Roxas broke last time. And now, I'll be able to create more replicas of the Organization members to serve me! Muhahaha!" Vexen laughs.
Nuh-uh, Vexy! It's Christmas! Where's your Christmas spirit?
"Okay, I'll be using them to prepare eggnog instead…" Vexen grumbles.
"A Limited Edition of the Midgard Halberd!" Xaldin exclaims.
"A pair of huge new revolvers!" Xigbar shouts.
"And a wonderful cup of steaming hot tea!" Xemnas takes yet another sip. "This is good!"
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Zexion nudges Lexaeus.
"Oh, yeah… it's me. On the fifth day of Christmas, Kingdom Hearts gave to me: a truckload of terracotta warriors!" Lexaeus sang.
"I think I could make them move… and then, they'll make the perfect army to take over the entire Kingdom Hearts universe. Ooohhh, Xemnas will be pleased!" Lexaeus whispers to himself.
Oh, come on, Lexy! Where's the love on Christmas Day? Besides, aren't you guys already… you know… dead?
"Fine. Then, that idea will have to wait." Lexaeus finishes his line.
"A whole new set of lab apparatus!" Vexen hugs his gift.
"A Limited Edition of the Midgard Halberd!" Xaldin exclaims.
"A pair of huge new revolvers!" Xigbar shouts.
"And a wonderful cup of steaming hot tea!" Xemnas takes another sip.
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"On the sixth day of Christmas, Kingdom Hearts sent to me: a box of interesting books for me to read!" Zexion lifts up a box filled with books to the brim. He takes one book and opens it and starts reading.
Ummm… Zexy? That's the wrong box. That's full of porno. I think your box is on your left.
"Hehe. Oops?" Zexion blushes, returns the book into the box and brings the box back to where it belongs.
"A truckload of terracotta warriors!" Lexaeus sings.
"A whole new set of lab apparatus!" Vexen hugs his gift. "I can't wait to use them!"
"A Limited Edition of the Midgard Halberd!" Xaldin exclaims.
"A pair of huge new revolvers!" Xigbar shouts.
"And a wonderful cup of steaming hot tea!" Xemnas takes another sip.
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Saix comes up. "On the seventh day of Christmas, Kingdom Hearts gave to me: a pack of young adorable wolf cubs!"
Eight wolf cubs, looking so cute and cuddly, run up to Saix and run in circles around him.
That's sweet! Now, you have friends to accompany you with howling at every full moon. Plus, they're pretty cute. Can I ask for one, Saix? Neh, just kidding!
"A box of interesting books!" Zexion takes a book and starts reading it.
"A truckload of terracotta warriors!" Lexaeus sings.
"A whole new set of lab apparatus!" Vexen hugs his gift.
"A Limited Edition of the Midgard Halberd!" Xaldin exclaims.
"A pair of huge new revolvers!" Xigbar shouts.
"And a wonderful cup of steaming hot tea!" Xemnas takes another sip.
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"On the eighth day of Christmas, Kingdom Hearts sent to me: my boyfriend who's still on the other side!" Axel is thinking Roxas.
"I want to hold him now in my arms, kiss him, hug him and f-" Axel is about to say "the f word".
Demyx! Blast his mouth with water before he taints the song with a swearing word! I give you the full authority to do so! Hurry!
And so, before Axel can complete his lust-problems-written-all-over-it statements, Demyx douses him with a steady jet of water.
"A pack of young adorable wolf cubs!" The eight cubs are still running around Saix in circles. "I'm getting dizzy of watching them."
"A box of interesting books!" Zexion is still reading the book.
"A truckload of terracotta warriors!" Lexaeus sings.
"A whole new set of lab apparatus!" Vexen hugs his gift.
"A Limited Edition of the Midgard Halberd!" Xaldin exclaims.
"A pair of huge new revolvers!" Xigbar shouts.
"And a wonderful cup of steaming hot tea!" Xemnas takes another sip.
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"On the ninth day of Christmas, Kingdom Hearts better give to me: an electric guitar with an amplifier, a drum set and a bass guitar!" Demyx cries out in joy.
"I can't play all these instruments alone. But with my water clones, I sure can!" Demyx summons up his water clones and they take their positions.
Hey! Not yet, Demmy! Finish the Christmas carol first!
"Oh, all right!" Demyx reluctantly dismisses his water clones.
"Roxas? Where is my Roxas?" Axel looks for the 15-year-old kid.
"A pack of young adorable wolf cubs!" The eight cubs are still running around Saix in circles.
"A box of interesting books!" Zexion is still reading the book.
"A truckload of terracotta warriors!" Lexaeus sings.
"A whole new set of lab apparatus!" Vexen hugs his gift.
"A Limited Edition of the Midgard Halberd!" Xaldin exclaims.
"A pair of huge new revolvers!" Xigbar shouts.
"And a wonderful cup of steaming hot tea!" Xemnas takes another sip.
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Luxord steps up on the platform and vocalizes a bit before resuming the lines of the song. "On the tenth day of Christmas, Kingdom Hearts sent to me: a brand-new deck of cards and chips and a whole bag of munny!"
He clutches the bag of munny greedily along with his other gifts. "Mine! Mine! All mine!"
Luxy? What did I say about not sharing your toys? No buts, young man! Share or I'm going to remove you from the song!
"Okay…" He looks down on the floor, a little bit mad and a little bit embarrassed.
"A new electric guitar with amplifier, a bass guitar and a drum set!" Demyx eyes his rock band set.
"Roxy? Where are you my love?" Axel screams at the top of his lungs.
"A pack of young adorable wolf cubs!" The eight cubs are still running around Saix in circles.
"A box of interesting books!" Zexion is still reading the book.
"A truckload of terracotta warriors!" Lexaeus sings.
"A whole new set of lab apparatus!" Vexen hugs his gift.
"A Limited Edition of the Midgard Halberd!" Xaldin exclaims.
"A pair of huge new revolvers!" Xigbar shouts.
"And a wonderful cup of steaming hot tea!" Xemnas takes another sip.
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Marluxia flips his hair, making rose petals fall on the floor. He clears his throat. "On the eleventh day of Christmas, Kingdom Hearts sent to me: a huge mutated carnivorous plant for me to take care of!"
The over-sized Venus flytrap beside him opens its mouth and is about to bite Marluxia's arm when he sees what the plant is about to do and slaps it.
Wow… that's such a dangerous gift, Marly. How are you going to keep it in line?
"No biting on Xemnas's thrown-away teddy bears tonight!" Marluxia scolds the plant. And the plant starts to weep.
"A brand-new deck of cards, chips and a bag of munny!" Luxord is still clutching to his Christmas presents.
"A new electric guitar with amplifier, a bass guitar and a drum set!" Demyx eyes his rock band set eagerly. "Yes! We're nearly done! One more line!"
"My boyfriend! Give me my boyfriend! Where is he?" Axel is desperately searching for Roxas.
"A pack of young adorable wolf cubs!" The eight cubs are still running around Saix in circles.
"A box of interesting books!" Zexion is still reading the book.
"A truckload of terracotta warriors!" Lexaeus sings.
"A whole new set of lab apparatus!" Vexen hugs his gift.
"A Limited Edition of the Midgard Halberd!" Xaldin exclaims.
"A pair of huge new revolver!" Xigbar shouts.
"And a wonderful cup of steaming hot tea!" Xemnas takes another sip. "I think the next sip will be the last…"
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Larxene steps into the center. "On the twelfth… but not the very last day of Christmas, Kingdom Hearts gave to me: all the autographed CDs of my favorite artists!"
She holds up five CDs, all with signatures of Beyonce, Lady Gaga, Britney Spears, The Pussycat Dolls and Hey Monday. "I see you looking at me! Like I'm some kind of freak! La-la-la-la-la see! Why don't you do something?"
Larx, the song isn't over yet. You can sing "Do Something" when we're done.
"Fine," she answers grumpily.
"An over-sized Venus flytrap!" Marluxia gives the plant yet another whack for trying to bite Larxene's antenna-like bangs.
"A brand-new deck of cards, chips and a bag of munny!" Luxord runs off to his room to keep his presents away from others who might want to borrow it.
"A new electric guitar with amplifier, a bass guitar and a drum set!" Demyx eyes his rock band set eagerly. "Hey! But I thought you said I can play a rock song when we're done?"
"Roxy! Where are you? You know I cannot go on without you!" Axel runs towards the horizon to look for Roxas.
"A pack of young adorable wolf cubs!" The eight cubs are still running around Saix in circles. Then, Saix falls on the ground from too much dizziness.
"A box of interesting books!" Zexion finishes the first book and gets another one from his box.
"A truckload of terracotta warriors!" Lexaeus brings the entire truckload to Xemnas.
"A whole new set of lab apparatus!" Vexen runs to his lab with the new equipment and locks himself there.
"A Limited Edition of the Midgard Halberd!" Xaldin goes outside to play with his new halberd.
"A pair of huge new revolver!" Xigbar follows Xaldin outside so they can play with their toys.
"And a wonderful cup of steaming hot tea!" Xemnas takes his last sip. "Now what was that idea Lexaeus?"
Oh well… at least they finished the carol. Tune in next time when I make them or the other KH characters sing some other song. Feel free to drop me a suggestion or whatsoever.
In your suggestion, just write the name of the song and the characters you want to be singing. You may add some lines that you have already modified so that I will know what you want to come out. But don't modify the entire song because then I will have nothing to change. And please, no Disney characters. Any song but no Disney characters. And if you wish to give the link of the song so that I may hear it (just in case I have never heard of it before), please do.
Sound Slayer, over and out.