Okay! Well, apologies for taking such a bloody long time to get this out; it's been what, a year? Two? Anyway, I'm back now (temporarily, with upcoming exams, though I'll probably have plenty of free time over summer).

Quick note before I get started; FF has messed up the formatting of the other chapters by removing the spaces and asterisks I used to separate different settings and time lines. I tried re-uploading them, but to no avail. So now, every time I change setting, I will put a new line with "SCENE X" (X denoting the scene no.) on. Hopefully that won't get edited out.

So, without further ado, let's get to it.

Also, I understand that with the way I am planning on playing the next few chapters out, the time line as far as the HP universe is concerned may be somewhat warped. Please assume that, for the purposes of this story, the final battle for Hogwarts took place when the eighth movie came out last year, meaning that Harry was born in 1994 (I think; my maths might be a bit messed up).

Chapter 5: A Promise To No One.

SCENE ONE

May 8, 1984. 9:15 a.m.

"Well, that went well." Waffles grinned as he sat down at the Ravenclaw table, picking up a strawberry from the selection of fruits and berries spread out for breakfast, which he proceeded to deftly toss into the air and catch in his mouth – leaning so far back as he did so that he almost fell from his seat. Righting himself, he quickly looked around at his friends.

"What, nobody wants to know what went well?" He enquired, a single eyebrow raised quizzically.

"I think we were all just curious as to what would happen if we didn't indulge you." Alicia responded with a sly smile. Waffles narrowed his eyes momentarily in mock-anger, then burst into uncontrollable laughter.

"Mutiny! Grrrhahaha! Why is everything so much funnier when you're trying not to laugh?!"

"I don't know. Maybe your brain's just messed up from the amount of times you've been hit in the head at those barbaric summer classes you take." She responded disapprovingly. Alicia never did see the appeal of physical combat – no matter how hard Waffles tried to convince her to give Muggle martial arts a try.

"Possible, I suppose – though it's really only Master Inosanto who can land anything on me any more. I'm like a ninja!" Waffles sprang up onto the table at the word "ninja", back-flipping off and landing in a deep, traditional Kung-Fu stance.

"Sure you are." She drawled, unfazed by the display of gymnastics. Sarcasm dripped from her words so thickly it was almost visible. "Anyway, leaving this inexplicable conversational tangent behind us, what, precisely, was it that went well?"

Waffles sank back into his seat, his grin broadening.

"I thought you'd never ask! Well, you know I'm duelling Slinkhard this Saturday?"

"No. It definitely isn't the only thing anyone's been talking about all week."

"My dear, you turn sarcasm into an art form. Anyway, that was exactly the problem I'd been having in organising the thing: everyone was talking about it. We'd never fit the whole school into the duelling hall. So, I had a chat with Professor Dumbledore, to ask if we could use the Great Hall."

"And?"

"He said no." Everyone's expectant faces dropped. Alicia narrowed her eyes.

"I thought you said it went well?" Waffles chuckled.

"It did. I'm getting to that. He said he didn't think the Hall would be a good place for something like that; something about there being too many expensive breakables and enchantments floating around which could mess things up. Instead, he offered us the Quiddich pitch-" This was met with a chorus of cheers and high-fives

"–on the condition that the entire staff be extended invitation as well, to 'ensure things don't get out of hand'. I think he wants to keep an eye on us, you know, make sure I don't break old Slinker." Everyone laughed, and started cheering and whooping again. Soon, the entire hall was buzzing with the news of the duel's new venue, rumours about what the two combatants-to-be were planning and predictions on who would win. Everyone seemed very pleased with the change of venue – even the new caretaker, Filch – who would have to do far less cleaning-up following an outdoor event.

With everyone thus occupied in gossip, Waffles took the opportunity for an aside with his friends.

"Okay everyone," he whispered, motioning for them to gather in,

"I'll be straight with you. I'm pretty confident about this one, but I'm not a hundred per cent. I mean, there's a reason I haven't beaten this guy yet. So I'm gonna need your help if I'm going to take him down this time around. Can I count on you?" A chorus of hushed affirmatives greeted him.

"Okay, great. In that case, I need all of you to meet me in the common room at... Shall we say seven o'clock? Can everyone make that?" Another round of "yes'"

"Wonderful. All right, I'll see you all there. Try not to be late; practice time is crucial!" With that, he stood up, swivelled on the spot and started to walk away. With an exasperated sigh, Alicia bid the others farewell, gathered up her things and started after him.

Just as she began to make her way down the corridor towards the Ravenclaw common room, Waffles' voice chimed in from behind her.

"You know, you really need to be more observant." Whirling around, she saw him leaning against the smooth stone wall, just beside the hall's entrance. His arms were crossed over the black school robes which, like all his wizard clothes, he'd had expertly tailored to fall just above his feet, so that they cloaked his stance from others' eyes while at the same time being high enough as to not risk him tripping over them. His hat, on the other hand, was the epitome of impracticality, its "point", if you could call it that, sagging almost as low as the brim which covered one eye due to the jaunty angle at which the thing was tipped. Still, it kept his long, shaggy hair out of his other eye so at least he could see – if only in two dimensions.

"Who said I was looking for you?" Alicia remarked haughtily.

"My apologies," Waffles stood up, brushing his hat back to reveal his other dark brown eye, now glinting with a hint of gold – which only added to his mischievous look, "must be my 'messed up' brain acting up again. So, assuming that you weren't looking for me, where are you off to in such a hurry?" Alicia shot him a glare, then dropped her head in submission.

"Okay, fine. I was looking for you. That was a pretty mysterious vibe you left in there."

"I know. Pretty sexy, huh?" He winked, the mischievous smile returning once more to its natural habitat on his face.

"I will punch you. Seriously, though. What are you planning?"

"That," he whispered as he drew closer, his eyes narrowed and shifting from side to side in mock-suspicion, "is what I intend to tell everyone later, in a more... Private setting." He motioned his head to one side, so slightly it was scarcely a twitch, but Alicia knew what he meant. Glancing over his shoulder, she saw Jonathan, one of Slinkhard's fan club, hiding inexpertly behind one of the pillars to the side of the entrance to the Great Hall.

"I see. You know, Waffles, maybe you are kind of smart after all."

"Why thank you, kind madam." He said with a bow, earning him a momentary giggle from Alicia.

"For an utter nutcase, that is." She added, still smiling. "Come on, we have a potions class to get to."

"Oh, joy. Two hours of the Slug Club parade, what better way to start the day?" He groaned, allowing Alicia to lead him off by the arm. "Still, it could be worse. We could be members!" He proclaimed as they marched off down the corridor, laughing together as they went.

-SCENE TWO-

May 8, 1984. 7:15 p.m.

"Well, we're all here. And only fifteen minutes late! Good work, Steve!" Waffles winked at the latest arrival - and one of his closest friends, Stephen Mortimer. He, along with his twin brother Colin, were both fifth years along with Waffles, and had supported Waffles' idea to start a Duelling Club even before he'd discussed it with Professor Flitwick. As such the twins, Waffles and Alicia were considered the founders of the club. Three others were present, all fellow Ravenclaws. Charlie, a shy, nerdy fourth-year whom Waffles had taken under his wing as protegee after he'd approached him one year previously and, shaking like a leaf, asked if there was any possibility of getting duelling lessons, as his Defence Against The Dark Arts grades were low and no amount of studying seemed to help. A year later he still had a lot to learn, but had transformed from a quivering boy with little natural talent to a wizarding force to be reckoned with. Lucy, a tiny, pixie-like sixth year girl with bright pink hair who had dazzled everyone in the club's early days with her ingenious use of both simple and complex charms and transfigurations to ensnare her opponents, and Dan, the powerful seventh-year who towered half a foot over everyone else present. He had similarly impressed everyone early on by showing a blend of strength and refinement, choosing to cast sophisticated layers of spells to confuse his opponents rather than going for the obvious tactic of overpowering them.

None of them had so far succeeded in defeating Slinkhard, though all had tried. However, between the seven of them they had the skills required to defeat not only him, but anyone in the world – and they knew it. That was part of the reason why they were all so close. They knew the only way to truly master each style was to learn it from someone to whom it came naturally. Under the twins they learned the art of illusion, something they had developed an interest in after years of switching places in the name of practical humour. From Lucy, they learned clever transfiguration tricks: How to turn simple floorboards into writhing vines which would snatch at your opponents' feet, or how to animate a suit of armour so that you could work on more complicated spells as it fought for you. Dan shared with them the art of multi-casting: of blending the incantations of two spells so that they would activate instantaneously – a technique which was most difficult to learn alone, as, if attempted incorrectly, it could often end in disaster. Even young Charlie was able to introduce the others to some nifty potion recipes which would clear their minds and quicken their thoughts in battle.

It took Alicia a few years to find her niche after the club started. For a while she just dabbled, trying bits of everything – with varying levels of success – until she tried summoning for the first time. After that, it was obvious she'd found her calling. From inanimate objects such as walls and swords to flocks of swallows and even, most recently, her phoenix Celestina (who was currently perched serenely on the mistress' shoulder) everything came naturally to her. Literally.

As for Waffles, well, he really did dabble. On the surface it would seem as though his forte was counter-spells, since he could counter or dispel almost any technique thrown at him with relative ease. However, in reality his true strength lay in his talent for unifying different techniques. He was like a sponge, absorbing every piece of useful information available to him – be it a new spell, or trick, or even an extra little twiddle of his wand which would lend a smidgeon of extra power, he would remember it. At the same time, though, he recognised how equally vital it was to dismiss anything which was ineffective (something which most students failed to consider; if a professor taught it, everyone just assumed it worked.) In a way, having little natural power made him more powerful than any of the others – purely because he had to compensate for it by studying and practising until he could block or counter almost every spell, hex or curse in existence and becoming so devilishly cunning that he was perfectly unpredictable. He could easily have been considered the most useful mentor of all, since after training with him nothing any other opponent did could possibly hold any surprise for the others. He still could, though. Even after several years, no one could second-guess Waffles. He liked that.

Of course, there was one other who fought like Waffles: Michelangelo. His name was actually just Michael, but Waffles had nicknamed him after the Ninja Turtle, and it had stuck – for good reason. The boy practically channelled him. He'd moved to England from Santa Barbara only a few months before starting Hogwarts after his parents, adamant that their son attend the best wizarding school in the world, applied for an international scholarship. Apparently you could get those; who knew?

In a matter of days, his world was turned upside down. He'd had to leave behind his whole life in America, move to a completely new country and start up at a school which he hadn't even known existed until two months prior to starting there, to learn magic of all things (his parents were muggles). And his biggest concern upon being told all of this?

"I bet the pizza there is going tosuck."

However, upon arriving he found that it really wasn't so bad once you got used to it, and after joining the Duelling club a few months after its opening he quickly learned that being at Hogwarts could be pretty fun, too.

He and Waffles were friends before anyone else even realised they'd met. They shared the same relaxed, carefree attitude, the same mischievous streak – and, more to the point, the same duelling style. As a Muggle-born, Michael didn't have as much magic in his blood as most of the others, so like Waffles he needed an alternative duelling style to the norm (beating each other down with the most powerful spells you can muster until one person is too exhausted to carry on of fails to block something properly). The fact that Waffles could throw together a mean pizza when he'd a mind to never hurt, either!

So of course when Waffles told him that he was going to be getting the group together for some impromptu training that evening, he'd signed himself up in a heartbeat.

"Come in! We're just getting ready to go." Called Waffles upon hearing a knock at the door, waving it open with his new wand, which he'd decided to name Jim. No one asked why; by this point they'd learned that it was much easier to simply accept his little eccentricities.

With a slight creak, the door swung open and in bounded one scruffy, hyper and unquestionably crazed Michelangelo. He'd clearly been drinking coffee that day, possibly among other things.

"Hi guys! How's it going?" He asked in his husky, upbeat New York accent. His face was split by a broad smile as he flopped down into a large, comfortable armchair, draped himself backwards over the arms and appraised the now upside-down gathering of people.

"Right! Who gave Mikey caffeine?!" Dan demanded in a mock-serious tone. The others laughed at this (and also possibly at Michelangelo, who at this point had slid head-first down the arm to the point of being unable to stop himself from falling to the ground in a heap. He stayed, there for a moment, possibly considering precisely which life decisions had brought him to this point, the sprung back up so he was sitting cross-legged in the circle the others had made.)

"I think I speak for everyone when I say it's going fairly well, though I do have a favour I'd like to ask of everyone." Answered Waffles, looking around at his friends. While outwardly I might look like I'm completely ready to face Slinkhard, in reality I still have a long way to go. That technique he pulled against Alicia," he motioned to her as she said this, and she acknowledged with a silent nod as Celestina bristled at the memory, "was unlike anything I've ever seen him do. He's clearly been practising a lot, so I'll need to be ready for anything. If you're up for it, I'd be very grateful if you'd all once again take up wands and join my preparation team. Maybe, with a little luck, this will be the time we finally win this thing. For Ravenclaw!"

"For Ravenclaw!" They echoed. "For Gryffindor," Proclaimed Michelangelo conspicuously, to glares from the others. He grinned in response.

"Yes, for Gryffindor as well." Waffles acquiesced. "Frankly, for anyone who has been consistently irritated by Slinkhard's ability to amaze and astound us at how terrible a sportsman he is." There was a chorus of assenting comments, and Waffles sprang to his feet.

"Well, then!" He declared, clapping his hand together sonorously, "There is no time to lose! To the training room!"

By this of course Waffles did not mean the Duelling club practice room in the dungeons. After all, what use was secret training if it was done in a public place? No, Waffles had a very different place in mind for this particular session – a room he and Michelangelo had stumbled upon the previous year while fleeing from the old caretaker (he had spotted them exiting the kitchens with several very full-looking boxes. What he didn't know was that rather than stealing food they were in fact utilising the cooking facilities themselves to throw together the prerequisite components of a pizza party, but one can understand how the picture would look from an outsider's perspective) and had since customised to suit their group's needs. Curiously enough, while the first time they had entered the room it had been filled with an assortment of junk (thus facilitating the act of hiding marvellously), when Waffles had returned to see if the room could be cleared out and converted to a training space it had all but been done for them. It was somehow bigger, for a start, with easily enough room for the whole group to practice in without getting in each others' way, as well as a larger duelling platform in the centre for demonstrations. Even the walls were lined either with mirrors for monitoring form or with bookshelves containing a number of tomes outlining various techniques and tricks which would prove useful in combat (though the group would later, upon leaving Hogwarts, donate some of their personal favourites to the already extensive library contained within the room so that the next generation of duellists would be able to benefit from the same knowledge as their predecessors, though after their departure from the school it would be a good many years indeed before it would be used for combat practice again.)

Upon arriving and performing the now automatic up, down-and-back-again walk along the corridor in order to "summon" the entrance to the training room, Waffles wasted no time in getting down to business.

"All right, everyone, we all know why we're here. I'm pretty good at the whole scrapping thing, if I do say so myself - but in order to win this one, I'm going to need to have as many techniques under my belt as possible. That's where you all come in. Everyone here is the best at what they do." there was a mixture of modest nods and embarrassed shaking of heads at this. Waffles continued,

"In order to defeat Slinkhard this Saturday, I'm going to need to know everything you know. Illusions, Transfiguration, Multi-casting, Charming, Summoning and, yes, even potion-mixing." He locked eyes with each member of the group as he described their speciality. "If it might be useful, then we must assume it will be. I know we usually pool our knowledge anyway, but for this I'm going to require the very best spells, combinations and dirty tricks you can think of. The crème de la crème, as the French say (probably). I know it's selfish of me to ask this, but hey, at least I brought cookies!" At that, he motioned to a large silver tin which had appeared on one of the tables near the bookshelves, seemingly by magic – though that would have contradicted Gamp's Law of Elemental Transfiguration.

"Feel free to help yourselves" he added, grinning, to a chorus of cheers. "So, everyone up for a week of hardcore training?"

"Sure." Responded Michelangelo. "I'd offer to be a jinxing bag if it got me free food. Where are we starting?" He asked almost unintelligibly through a disgracefully large bite of cookie.

"Actually, I was kind of hoping you'd be up for a sparring session to warm up, since I did just spend a week in the hospital wing. I fear I may be a little rusty and you're usually the best one to test myself against, since we're more or less the same person in the arena."

Michelangelo laughed at that.

"You're right there! Well, except for the fact that I'm way better looking!" With that he sprung, laughing, up the steps onto the platform in the centre of the room, drew out his wand and took up a ridiculously exaggerated mockery of Waffles' martial arts-esque stance. "Come face your doom, Adalbert Waffling. If you dare." He boomed in his best faux-British accent. It was still fairly poor.

With a whisper, Waffles levitated himself up until he was just above the platform, then gently lowered himself to land gracefully opposite his sparring partner.

"Very well, then. Shields up, everyone," The others wordlessly drew their wands and, forming a ring around the platform, cast a collective shield charm to contain any stray spells or body parts within the arena. "Dan, on your count."

As the most sensible member of the group, Dan was generally given the task of group referee. It didn't bother him much, since he usually preferred to watch than duel anyway.

"Okay, everyone knows the rules by now so I'll skip that. Wands ready? Begin!"

As soon as they had entered the arena the two combatants had crouched down, mentally coiling themselves up like cobras about to strike. Upon hearing the referee's word, they launched themselves forward, roaring incantations as they did so. Waffles easily dodged Michelangelo's first hex, diving to the side, rolling and firing off a counter-spell from a crouch. Both duellists' first strikes dissipated harmlessly against the shield around the arena, as everyone knew they would. The first few spells were never meant to do anything more than see how the opponent responded. Sometimes Waffles and Michelangelo would skip this introduction and go straight into their main strategies, since they knew each other so well, but they both had some new tricks up their sleeves this time. Neither player was ready to show their hand just yet.

"Expelliarmus!" Shouted Michelangelo, sending a burst of red light towards Waffles' right hand. Waffles froze for a moment, not sure if he'd misheard, then chuckled, easily batting the disarming spell aside, and sent a handful of light hexes and jinxes his opponent's way as punishment for trying such a basic tactic on him.

"You weren't really expecting to catch me with Expelliarmus, were you?" Waffles asked in between incantations.

"Not really," Michelangelo replied after sending one of Waffles' hexes back at him, forcing him to lean backwards, Matrix-style, to avoid it. "But your reaction are pretty slow, so..." He trailed off, grinning, as Waffles' eyes glinted evilly.

"Slow, huh? Let's see who's slow NOW!" With that, Waffles launched himself at his opponent, blasting off several shots of energy while airborne which Michelangelo struggled to dodge, unable to catch his breath long enough to counterattack. With a flourish, Waffles landed on a few feet from his opponent and, without even giving him time to prepare a defense, slammed him with a freezing charm, a binding spell and a stunning spell all at once. The now-rigid boy stared at him with surprise for a moment, then started to... Disappear?

"Yo dude! Over here!" His eyes wide, Waffles whirled around to spot his completely unscathed friend leaning against the invisible wall around the arena, twirling his wand around his fingers. Waffles chuckled.
"Not bad, Mikey. Not bad at all. One of Colin's, I'm guessing?" Outside the arena, the twin nodded, grinning. Only a handful of people knew the twins well enough to be able to tell one's handiwork apart from the other's. Waffles tried to turn around, only to find himself frozen in place. "And a simultaneous body-bind, too. We have been practising. However," he said with his trademark mischievous grin, "not quite good enough." With that, he gave a rapid incantation – so rapid that the others did not even realise what he was doing until he was freed from the spell – and returned to his usual stance, his wand again at the ready.

"From the surprised look on your face, I'm guessing you didn't know you could substitute a spell-amplifier for the wrist-motion usually required to counter a body bind curse." Michelangelo shook his head, smiling.

"No, but I should have expected you to know that. I'm still winning, though." He responded, returning to his usual stance – a far more orthodox one than Waffles', though it was still far removed from the norm – a trait common in all the group's members.

"Not quite." Waffles replied. "Because now you can't move." With a flick of his wrist, Waffles demonstrated why. Immediately, Michelangelo felt the countless taut, sharp little strings pressing against him on every side. He was caught in a web, just as Alicia had been when she'd fought Slinkhard.

"Yes." Waffles broke the moment of realisation for all of them. Even though they couldn't see the strings, the spectators knew from Michelangelo's reaction what it was Waffles had done. "I found out how Slinkhard does his little spider's web trick. It's really not that complicated, though it does require a lot of concentration. I don't think I'd be able to keep it up as well as a summoning. In fact, the only reason I was able to use it here is because the amplifier I used to get out of the body-binder could be applied to this, too. Talk about a double-whammy" Waffles said with a wink, allowing the spell to dissipate. Michelangelo shook himself off for a moment.

"Wow, that was really weird. Like, I've been caught by binding spells before, but that was something new. How does it work?" He asked, completely unperturbed by his loss. It was clear to everyone present that neither of the two had been really taking this match seriously. If they had been, it would have been far messier. Six people were often not enough to maintain the shield when those two clashed, but with a major match so close and Waffles fresh out of the hospital wing, neither of them wanted to risk any injuries. This was essentially a game of chess, each testing the opponents to see who fell into whose trap.

"It's actually pretty simple. It's like you've taken the constituent parts of an incarcerus charm and unravelled them. Imagine for instance that your standard binding charm ties the target up with a rope. This thing unravels the rope into its constituent fibres and uses those instead. That's how you can cover a whole room with a single spell. It does, however, take a lot of concentration – and a lot of power – to pull off. That's why I had to use an amplifier. Could probably have done with a second, all things considered. That was rather tiring." Waffles slumped down into one of the comfortable desk-chairs and chomped down a cookie.

"Well, I'm warm, anyway. So, any constructive criticism?" He asked the group in general, knowing that everyone would probably have something to throw in.

"Well, you got duped by the illusion" Steve began. "All due credit to my little brother here," (he was born a few minutes earlier than Colin) "it was a pretty good one – but there are always tells. Firstly, the area around them is always a little warped, like, uh... Like the air above a candle. You know how it's always a little blurry..."

This continued for a few minutes, everyone giving their comments and solutions. Waffles remained silent throughout, stopping the others only occasionally to ask them to expand on a point or to ask a related question. That was, until the last person to speak, Michelangelo, chimed in.

"Plus, you know, you almost got caught with Expelliarmus, of all things. That would've been embarrassing." Waffles looked at him thoughtfully for a moment, unsure whether or not to say what he was thinking. To hell with it, he thought, if I can't be honest with these guys, who can I be honest with?

"Actually, I have something I'd like to try out, if you're up for it?"

"Sure." Michelangelo shrugged. "Though knowing you, I'll probably end up regretting this." Waffles laughed.

"I wouldn't worry about that. All I need you to do is disarm me. I promise not to try to deflect it."

"Come on, man, we've been over this." Michelangelo groaned exasperatedly, "swapping your wand to the other hand at the last second doesn't work, and catching it after the spell takes it away is impossible. Fankly, if it were possible the spell'd be worse than useless."

"No, look. I know that, I just... I just thought of something and I need you to disarm me so I can check to see if it works."

"Sure, whatever you say. But three sickles says you end up looking like a dumbass." With that, they took up their places on the platform once again. Immediately Waffles closed his eyes and began to focus, drawing on the glimmer of power he'd felt within himself since his old wand had shattered, trying to feel the pieces coming together like they had when he'd fought the trolls.

"You ready?" Michelangelo asked, his wand at the ready. After a few seconds, Waffles nodded.

"Then here goes nothing, I guess. Expelliarmus!"

The moment the wand left his hand, Waffles' eyes snapped open, his right arm snapping out so that his open palm faced the airborne weapon. He waited an extra moment, allowing the energy within himself to swell a little more, before shouting out,

"Accio!" Everyone was silent. A few moments passed, then...

There was a light rattle as the wand fell to the ground near one of the corners of the room.

"Accio!" Waffles shouted again, to no avail. The wand remained stubbornly motionless. Waffles' head dropped a little.

"Well, you definitely owe me some silver, dude." Michelangelo piped up, with one eyebrow raised quizzically. "Here, let me give you a hand. Accio." The wand remained motionless.

"Clearly, summoning charms don't benefit from a Californian accent." Alicia drew her wand, a slightly amused expression on her face. "Let me give you a hand. Accio wand." Nothing happened.

After everyone else had given it a try, Waffles gave a chuckle.

"Well, at least I'm not the only one with performance issues today. I guess there's some kind of anti-summoning charm on this room. Weird."

"That is very weird," Alicia agreed. "But not as weird as you trying to do magic without a wand. What exactly were you thinking?" Waffles fell silent for a moment at this, staring at the brightly lit ceiling as he tried to find a way of explaining his discovery. After a moment of contemplation he shrugged away his doubt. There was no-one in the world, bar perhaps his family, whom he trusted more than the people present in the training room. If he couldn't be honest with them, who could he be honest with?

"Well, you know how I kind of, sort of, got into a fight with a bunch of Death Eaters and wound up in the hospital wing?" He asked rhetorically. Everyone nodded anyway.

"Well, when they said I was there because of a curse they'd hit me with they were only telling half the truth. Firstly, it wasn't just any spell. It was the big bad. The AK-47. You know. The one you're not supposed to be able to live through." This was met by gasps, and a moment of disbelief from everyone present. But of course it was Waffles, and when it came to serious things Waffles never lied. "But that's not the bit we're interested in. See, there was something else that isn't supposed to happen. When I tried to block the curse my wand shattered and the shards buried themselves in, well, me. My arm took most of it, but the splinters went everywhere. I even remember getting hit in the eye, though when I woke up everything seemed fine. And I don't mean fine like I recovered with a lot of attention from the wonderful healing staff here at Hogwarts. I mean fine as in nothing happened in the first place. But of course it all definitely did happen and the super-crazy part is that ever since then, I've been able to... Feel... The shards, as though the broken little bits of wand were still working, in a way. So I decided to try it out. As you all know, I like to do little bits of private training here and there, yes? Well, I was sparring with one of my slightly less human partners and something rather odd started happening. For example, have you ever heard of anyone being able to see magic? Because I'm fairly sure I can do that now. Also, in another instance I was able to use magic while my wand was still tucked away in my belt. Not just any old magic, either. Proper, full-power lightning bolt-shooting magic." He paused for a moment to let everything sink in. "Oh, and I think I have super-human strength now, since I essentially took on a troll chieftain in a fist fight the other day." He added matter-of-factly. "Well, I've always been able to beat a troll in a fight, but not without magic. Curious, isn't it?"

Everyone was silent for a moment, before the ever-unshakable Michelangelo broke the silence.

"Curious? Dude... That's freaking awesome! D'you reckon it works for all wands?" Waffles laughed wryly,

"I wouldn't recommend testing it. For all we know this was a total fluke. Frankly, if it always worked someone else would have discovered it by now. I mean, what are chances of no-one ever having accidentally hit their opponent's wand with a killing curse?" The others nodded in agreement.

"So... How exactly does it work? Using the broken wand to cast spells, I mean." Asked Dan. Being a seventh-year, he was the among the most experienced members of the duelling club, so when someone discovered a new technique or principle he was usually among the first to comprehend the theory behind it, even if he did not master it as quickly as others – that said, there was very little now that he had not come across himself. Waffles had known all along that his interest would be particularly piqued by this particular discovery.

"It's hard to explain," He answered slowly, "I suppose it isn't unlike regular casting, except I have to focus more intensively. It isn't like a standard spell where you have to focus on your wand motion – it's more like... I have to concentrate on mentally telling the broken wand what I want it to do. Hey, there's a thought!" He sprang back to his feet, causing the others to flinch back slightly – their circle around him had been steadily shrinking as he'd told his story.

"What if I don't need an incantation? What if I can just concentrate really hard on something, and..." Trailing off, he held out his right hand and shut his eyes. A moment later he felt his wand leap into it.

"...Make it happen?" He finished, opening his eyes. He put the wand away and put his hand to his chin thoughtfully.

"That's cool. And could definitely come in handy – excuse the pun – but is it safe?" Alicia asked, her brow furrowed slightly in concern.

"Right now I have no reason to think otherwise." Waffles answered, flashing a broad smile. "If it wasn't, the Hospital Wing staff would've said something about it. I wouldn't worry. Besides, I survived a freaking killing curse. If something was going to kill me I feel like that would have been it. Fate clearly doesn't want me dead just yet." He finished in a booming, prophetic voice. Alicia laughed at that.

"Well, since you put it that way... I suppose if having a bunch of splinters embedded in you was going to kill you it probably would have been in the first few hours following the incident, so the odds are probably in your favour at this point."

"Thanks, Doctor Clarkson. I'm sure your mother would be very pleased to know that you do indeed pay attention to all of the medical trivia she likes to fill your brain with."

"Hey, I'll have you know that in the muggle world, doctors are extremely well-respected, and-"

"I know, I know. She heroically saved your dad's life after a freak manticore attack. Still, you have to admit – our way is better for a lot of things. Anyway-" He derailed the train of conversation before Alicia could drag them all into a medical debate which she would inevitably end up winning, though no-one would quite understand how, "-That's besides the point. The fact of the matter is that I can now use magic without a wand. I foresee a lot of fun in our future. First things first, though. How can I use this to my advantage on Saturday? After all, it's hardly as though Slinkhard's likely to cast a disarming spell on me and throwing away my wand would just be counterproductive, even if it did give me the element of surprise."

"Do you really want to use this in that match? I mean, wouldn't that be against the rules somehow?" Asked Charlie, causing everyone else to burst into roars of laughter. Just as Charlie began to turn red, Waffles stepped over to him and, putting his hand on Charlie's shoulder, gently shook his head.

"Oh Charlie, you poor innocent sod. You're too good for us, you know that?" He chuckled, then continued. "I should have mentioned this a long time ago, don't know why I didn't, really – I suppose I didn't want to scare you off. See, the thing is – when we duel here, it's not just for fun. It's preparation for the big, bad world. And in the real world people don't follow rules. So if you think about it, the fewer rules we set the better, in keeping with the whole preparation thing, right?" Charlie nodded uncertainly.

"But surely it's important so be honourable, otherwise how are we any different from the Death Eaters?" Asked Charlie, frowning. Waffles smiled.

"Possibly. But then, if we only break the rules when fighting them, and only fight them because they torture and kill innocent people - magic and muggle – for sheer entertainment, I'd say there's quite a distinct difference, wouldn't you?"

Charlie opened his mouth as if to reply, then dropped his gaze. "I'm sorry." He mumbled.

"Sorry? Whatever for? Look," Waffles lifted Charlie's chin to face him, "what was the first thing I ever taught you?"

"To never duel right after eating?"

"No, before that!" Charlie looked at the ceiling, trying to recall his first lesson with Waffles, before Waffles interrupted him.

"To never be afraid to questionanything and everything that I teach you. Otherwise, what will you have learned in the end? Nothing, that's what!" He paused, glancing around the room at the others, who were watching bemusedly.

"All right everyone, I think it's time I shared something with you that I've been working on for a very long time indeed. To this day, I have absolutely no idea why no one else seems to have thought of this before – or at least thought of it and actually pursued it, but there you are. Perhaps I'm a fool. Or perhaps I'm a visionary! Either way, here it is. Charlie, in full fairness to you you were never present for any of the more... Realistic training sessions, so you couldn't have been expected to know about the whole not following the rules thing. Although quite why you didn't pick up on it from the fact that we were all so interested in those mind-sharpening potions you kept brewing up even though they clearly are against the rules I don't know. Either way," he continued, cutting off Charlie's imminent interruption, "it doesn't matter. We've covered fortifying potions, clothing charms for shielding and cloaking, exploding charms to turn marbles into high-powered bombs and weightlessness charms to enable a pair of boots to leap over city blocks. All, of course, completely against the club's rules" he added, winking at Charlie, who was staring wide-eyed and open-mouthed. "Darkness powders and invisible snare traps to allow easy retreat or prevent the opponent's, destabilising spells to collapse ceilings on a roomful of opponents and even those to open up the jaws of the Earth itself to swallow them whole, we have studied them all – and all of them are well and truly against the rules. However, there is one thing we haven't covered yet, even though it's by far the safest to practice: Physical combat."

The room was silent for a while, until Alicia broke it.

"You mean muggle fighting? If so, that's hardly safe. The number to patients my mother's seen who've been injured in barbaric bar brawls-"

"-I know that looks barbaric. But that, My dear," He caught her gaze in his own friendly yet powerful one, "is because they are doing it wrong. I, on the other hand, am going to teach you all how to do it right!" With that, he leapt back up onto the arena, landing softly and spinning about to face his friends in a single fluid motion.

"Sorry to burst your bubble, old friend, but this is the wizarding world. We fight with magic. It's a little bit more effective than fists." Boomed Dan, to ineffectively concealed laughter from the others. Waffles raised a lone eyebrow in amusement, and extended his hand.

"Very well, then. If you have such faith in your magic, why don't you test it against me? Come on, I promise I won't even hit you." For a moment Dan seemed uncharacteristically uncertain, then he shook his head in mock-disbelief and climbed up onto the stage to join Waffles.

"There we go! Right. Standard starting distance is about four metres from each other, there we go, okay. On your count, feel free to start casting. If you can hit, me, you win a cookie." Waffles drew his wand. "Don't worry. I'll only be using this to block. I promise I won't actually duel you, either. Are you ready?" Dan nodded, looking a little confused but determined nonetheless. "Whenever you're ready, then."

Silently, Dan stepped into his usual upright, side-on stance, then began to count.

"One... Two... Three! Stupefy!"

The stunning spell didn't even some close to landing. Before Dan had even had time to begin his second incantation, the demonstration was over. Wordlessly, the others stared in shock at the scene before them.

Dan, towering, powerful Dan, who easily outweighed Waffles by at least eighty pounds, lay pinned on his back, his own wand being held at his throat by Waffles, who had sheathed his own and was using his spare hand to restrain one of Dan's (the other was pinned under Waffles' knee). Waffles flashed him a grin before springing to his feet and helping his up.

"And that, everyone, is how you win a duel without casting a single spell. It's true that magic is a lot more effective than fists, but allow someone who knows how to use their hands the opportunity to get close enough, and you'll find that your ability to use magic is somewhat hindered by the fact that they have your wand."

After glancing around to ensure the reality of what had just occurred had properly sunk in, Waffles returned Dan's wand and loudly clapped his hands together, causing the others to jump out of their stunned states.

"Well then, let's not just stand here gaping – it's practice time!"

-SCENE THREE-

May 8, 1984. 10:00 p.m.

A little over two hours passed before Waffles was satisfied enough with the group's progress that he called them to stop. Tired and sore, they staggered over to the ring of chairs they so fondly remembered from earlier that evening (though by now they were all so delirious from exhaustion that that memory seemed more like a half-remembered dream) and collapsed into seven ragged, sweaty heaps. Waffles, of course, remained standing. Bizarrely, while even a few minutes' continuous spell casting left him breathless and shaking, he could endure hour after hour of physical combat which would have anyone else performing a very convincing cadaver impression and still be bursting with energy. He had often tried to explain that while there wasn't an awful lot of magic in his blood, that had no effect on his physical fitness. Sadly, this being the Wizarding world, the majority of people found this explanation even more confusing than the phenomenon itself. Nowadays, he just told people he drank a lot of experimental potions – which was true enough, though that mostly affected his strength, speed and bone density rather than his endurance.

"Well, I feel like that was a fairly productive training session! How about you guys?" A groan of agony and exasperation was the response he both received and, come to think of it, deserved. However, his mood was unabashed.

"Oh, come on! It wasn't that bad! We just went over the basics – which are really important! I know drilling the same few basic techniques over and over isn't the most riveting of activities, but it's the fastest way to really get these moves down. Plus now, if we're sparring and I try the trick I caught Dan with earlier, you'll all be ready for it!"

"Yay," Chipped in Michaelangelo sarcastically. "Maybe next week we can practice Spinning Bird Kicks. Seriously, bro, this is all great but it's gonna take us so long to learn anything useful that we might as well just stick to what we do best."

"WRONG!" Waffles roared, causing everyone to jump, then glare at him in unison for forcing them to waste precious energy.

"You forget that when this club first started all anyone used was stunning spells, jelly-leg jinxes and befuddlement charms. The style with which we fight has been revolutionised time and time again, to such an extent that it hardly seems prudent to even call what we did at the start "duelling". Every time someone came up with a new concept we would all dive right on it because we knew that whoever mastered it first would have a massive advantage over everyone else until they caught up. And now you're telling me that you don't need to learn anything new? Please. Trust me, this is the future of duelling. Just as surely as spell-amplifiers are going to fade out of competitive duelling, so too are physical fighting styles going to become a powerful force."

"You know, as painful as this has been, I think he could be right," croaked Alicia. "Think about it. Nowadays the old-fashioned duelling style of throwing up a shield, performing all your powerful incantations then throwing everything at your opponent and hoping that your spells are stronger than theirs is completely obsolete. Duellists are getting physically closer to make it more and more difficult for their opponents to react in time to counter their spells. Usually if you're being outspelled by your opponent the instinct is to step back to give yourself some breathing room, but what if instead you stepped forward? I know that before today I'd have been completely at a loss as to how to deal with something like that." There was a reluctant murmur of agreement from the others, with Michaelangelo eventually giving in as well.

"I suppose landing a Spinning Bird Kick in a duel would be pretty cool", he said grudgingly.

"Wonderful! So shall we say... Same time tomorrow? Just to discuss strategy, of course!" He added quickly, before the protests began. "Don't worry, I don't expect you to do this two nights in a row. That would be mad even for me!" He waited for the sighs of relief to abate before continuing, "Right! Well, I think that's more than enough for one day. I'm off to the Prefects' bathroom for some well-deserved R&R if anyone would like to join me; apparently they've added another tap with a pretty decent revitalisation draught to the hot tub, which sounds like it could be just the thing for tonight!" While talking, he reached behind him and pulled open a large mahogany wardrobe which was, of course, filled with new bathing suits. The Room of Requirement had yet to fail the group, and it was not about to start now. "Grab a suit if you're coming and, if not, goodnight - and I shall see you tomorrow!" With that, he deftly unhooked a pair of orange & black swim-shorts and walked out.

-SCENE FOUR-

"So what exactly is your plan for Saturday? So far today we've mostly just been learning Muggle-style fighting, and I can't see that being much help in a formal duel, particularly in an arena like the Quiddich pitch," asked Alicia, after the taps had finished running the obscenely oversized pool incomprehensibly referred to by the administration as a "bath".

"Well," began Waffles, leaning back against the backrest which lined the edge of the pool and crossing his hands behind his head in the most stereotypically relaxed pose imaginable, "It's definitely not going to be easy. After all, Slinkhard is arguably the most powerful wizard in the school – bar the Headmaster, of course." There was a murmur of grudging acceptance at this from the now reduced group (a number of members had returned to their dormitories to sleep, catch up on homework or avoid the possibility of detention if they were discovered. It was, after all, considerably later than the usual nine o'clock bedtime for students and not everyone was in the convenient position of being a school prefect. Now only Waffles, Alicia and Michaelangelo remained to enjoy the rejuvenating effects of the Prefects' spa (calling it a bathroom seemed silly to everyone who had actually seen its interior.))

"So of course he'll be at a massive advantage as far as general spellcasting goes. As you all know, witches and wizards are capable of using magic because of the magic in our blood. The more saturated our blood is with magic, the more we can do with it. Everyone knows that much. But the rest is a little more complicated. Early magic users quickly realized that their powers were far too unreliable and uncontrollable to be practical. In its raw form, magic can only really act upon a single thought or emotion – which makes performing very specific tasks very difficult indeed. For example, it's easy to think "Stop that bus", when one is about to be run over. It's a lot harder to think "stop that bus gradually so as to ensure that it doesn't hit me but preferably without all of the passengers being instantly killed by an astronomical opposing force". Fortuitously, it was soon discovered that vibrations at certain frequencies caused the magic in their blood to have behave in different ways, sometimes even temporarily obtaining different properties. This subsequently led to the invention of incantations (interestingly enough, almost the entire Latin language was formed through the discovery of magic-controlling words and phrases). Of course, soon after that people realized that other creatures had magic in their blood as well and started putting the more magic-rich parts of them into wooden funnels, through which spells could be channelled and both amplified and further controlled. We know these handy little instruments as wands. As wands started being used, people realized that certain wand motions could cause spells to change in different ways - becoming more potent by drawing on magical energy in the surroundings, changing direction, and so on, and so we arrive at the present day."

"That's all very interesting – especially the bit about Latin; I'd never heard that before –" Alicia stopped herself, shaking her head for a moment, "But where does Slinkhard fit into all this?"

"Fear not!" Waffles exclaimed, "I'm coming to that. So, we know now why wands, incantations and wand motion are important. But now we come to the key part. All spells require a certain amount of magic to be drawn from the blood of the caster and released into the world, either through a wand or otherwise. The amount of effort this requires depends how much of the latent atmospheric magic the user can draw on through the usage of spell-amplifiers, wand motion and incantations. However, the more powerful the caster, the less help they need from these. That's why Slinkhard makes difficult spells look so easy. Because he has so much magic in his blood that for him they are easy. He doesn't have to worry about amplifiers, getting the wand motion right or even wording the spells perfectly. He can more or less just will the world to change and watch bemusedly as those changes unfold. Moreover, from what we've seen from him in the duelling club marathons we've had in the past, he won't run out of magic for a very long time. The guy's a beast; even his basic spells are thrice as powerful than they should be. So that, ladies and gents, is what I'm up against. That is my conundrum. Oh, and high magic concentrations in one's blood bestows a passively increased resilience to spells as well – so he can shrug off hexes and charms that would completely incapacitate you or I."

The room was quiet for a moment, then Michaelangelo asked,

"So why challenge him? I mean, he sounds pretty unstoppable – and from what we've seen, he really is. Why even bother with it, if he's so much more powerful than the rest of us?"

Waffles smiled at him wryly.

"I was hoping you'd ask me that. Why indeed? Why bother duelling an opponent so much more powerful than myself, when the oddly of emerging victorious are so slim? Quite simply, because I have to. Because of everything in the world there is nothing I desire more than to retire to bed each night a better wizard than I was when I awoke, and I know that the fastest way for me to achieve that is to fight the most powerful opponents I can find. My theory was that by challenging the most difficult opponent available I would force myself to work harder than ever, to learn and adapt in ways that I had never even considered. I was right. In the last few days, I have learned things that have led me to begin evolving my entire duelling style. It'll take me a day or so to completely figure it all out, but I'll be ready to test it on Thursday, when we meet up again for training – which now that I think of it means that we probably won't be able to continue our hand-to-hand training until Monday - what a shame. Oh well. I daresay everyone will be grateful for the reprieve. Personally, I think that if everyone spent a few minutes in this place they'd be ready to go another round in minutes." As he said this, he shut his eyes and allowed himself to lose himself for a moment in the blissful tranquillity brought on by the various fragrant potions that fortified the steaming water.

"Cryptic as always. Still, it sounds interesting, bro. I'll look forward to seeing it. Right now, though, I think I'm gonna go hit the hay. Catch you guys later!" With that, Michaelangelo sprang out of the pool – causing the maximum possible amount of flooding as he did so – threw on the pinkest, fluffiest bathrobe he could find from the rack by the door, collected his wand and robes and exited the spa, leaving Waffles and Alicia alone.

"Okay, spill." Waffles raised an eyebrow at Alicia quizzically as she continued,

"What is your plan for Saturday? I know you've got something specific up your sleeve, otherwise you wouldn't be this confident. What are you planning, Waffles?"

"Careful, now. You almost sound concerned." Waffles said.

"I just don't want you to do something stupid to the point of getting yourself hurt. I worry about you sometimes, you know." Her tone was soft, scarcely above a whisper. Waffles smiled equally softly, leaning towards her.
"I know. Just as I worry about you. All of you. That's why I do all of the crazy things that I do. So no one else has to. Because if I'm trying out a new spell counter and end up getting my wand blown up and embedded in me then that's fine, because I've consumed enough fortifying potions and trained my body to the point that I can weather that and live. And then I can come back to the group and say "Well, this Avada Kedavra defense doesn't work all that well but it's better than nothing! I'd suggest just getting in close and pinning their wand hand, though.""

"So that's why you picked now to start teaching us that Muggle fighting? Because you can't think of a defence to Avada Kedavra? Waffles, no one has ever survived that curse before. No one expects you to come up with a defence now. To even attempt something like that is insane."

"Precisely. But then, if I don't attempt the insane, who will? I swore the day this war started that I would never allow any of my friends to be harmed because of it. It was a promise to no one, but one that I intend to keep nonetheless."

"That's so much pressure to put on yourself. I had no idea... I guess you're so relaxed and carefree all of the time we all – I assumed that you never really thought about serious stuff like that. I mean, I knew that you were serious about self-defence, but not like this..." Alicia stopped, lowering her head.There was so much to take in, so much to re-evaluate. She didn't know where to start.

"I'm sorry. I never should have brought it up. I didn't mean to worry you."

Alicia looked back up at Waffles and took his hand.

"Worry me?" She choked, "you... You apologise too much."

Waffles opened his mouth to apologise for apologising too much, then thought better of it. Smiling, he instead replied,

"Thank you - for understanding. I know I can be a little crazy sometimes, so I really appreciate you putting up with it. The truth is I never actually realised how serious things had gotten out there until I fought those Death Eaters. I expect I come across as being confident and strong in training because that's how I want to feel, but honestly... It terrified me. Knowing just how close I came, feeling so helpless..."

"-Stop. Please. You're here, and you're okay, and we're all growing stronger by the day. That's all that matters." She squeezed his hand gently. "Remember, we care about you just as much as you care about us. Don't think that we won't protect you too, if it comes to it." Waffles smiled at that, and nodded to himself.

"Well, good luck finding anything I can't take on myself. You know I can dual cast spells with both wands now, right?" Alicia laughed. Waffles was clearly back to normal.

"Wow, four spells at once. Slinkhard won't know what hit him."

"Indeed he won't. But not for that reason." Alicia cocked her head quizzically as he carried on,, "The technique is called Blink-Walking. That's all you're getting for now." He waved away her protests apologetically, continuing, "It's a very long story, and I want everyone to hear it. It's going to be hard to explain, though."

"What is?"

"That only I can use this technique." Waffles said. There was a sense of finality to it, and Alicia knew that this was not Waffles' opinion. He had stated it so bluntly that it could only be a fact – Waffles was rarely wrong about things like this. She considered pressing him for more details, but thought better of it. Instead, she settled for resting her battle-weary head on his shoulder and closing her eyes, surrendering to the calming, soporific effects of the delightfully warm, potion-infused water.

Fin.

Well. That was... Long. How long has it been, anyway? Two years? Three? Apologies for that. I've been busy. Honestly I could have uploaded this a year ago but I'd planned on getting the duel out of the way in this chapter. However, I just did a word count and it's quite literally over 9000 so I think I'll save that for the next one.

Thank you for your patience with me, both for taking so long to get this done and uploaded and for not continuing with the main narrative – honestly I'm finding this little side-arc more interesting right now so I'm going to stick with it for a short while, if it's all the same to you. My intention is to write a spin-off in the pure HP section about the adventures of Waffles, Alicia and co. I'll get around to it at some point. Probably.

However, that won't be too soon since I've recently taken on another project! I am... Drumroll please...

…

WRITING A PLAY!

Well, co-writing. After performing a version of Sherlock Holmes, a Drama in Four Acts set in an alternate universe in which John Watson is Joanna Watson, we decided it would be irresponsible of us not to give out wonderfully reinvented character a backstory. I am co-writing this piece with the good doctor herself, the lovely and talented – do check out her page; in particular the remarkably well-done Doctor Who screenplay.

So that's what I've been up to lately (well, that and a Psychology degree, a vicious training regimen (I'm determined to become as Waffles-esque as possible before this story is done) and a lot of theatre. So much theatre.) Hope you're all well and that you're enjoying the story so far – and if so, please do review! It lets me know what I'm doing well, and what I still need to work on – and ultimately improves the quality of future instalments! Yay!

All the best,

-Seb/Gem/Origami (yes, I took a new name. So sue me.)

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