The Travails of Napoleon

Summary: Missing scene, from "Red Sauce." He had to get the pony in her office somehow. And I think that was probably funny. Here's my take on it.
Rating: K+
Disclaimer: I own Devil Wears Prada, so I can see Simon Baker anytime I want. Unfortunately, that's the end of it.

For a few seconds, no one said anything. There was silence, broken only by a slow clip-clop and a few snorts, and then the contented munching of carrots. Eventually, someone felt obliged to point out the obvious.

"It's a pony."

"Yes, thank you, Cho," Jane grinned affably, tugging the harness to convince the stubborn little horse to follow him.

"For Lisbon?"

"Yes."

Cho's eyebrows went up, and then he simply shrugged before going back to his work. "Hmm." Watching Jane trying to get Lisbon's attention was one of his new favorite pastimes. It was like watching a second-grader pulling on his classmate's pigtails.

Rigsby, having been in the kitchen and having therefore missed the entrance, came back into the bullpen, eyes trained on his very full cup of coffee. "Hey guys. What's up?"

"Jane has a pony."

Rigsby glanced at Cho for a second, bewildered, clearly not sure where this information came from, before he caught sight of Jane and the pony. "Whoa. That's a pony."

"That's correct." Jane pulled harder on the reins, but the little brown-and-white horse snorted in protest and dug his little hooves in. "Rigsby, could you possibly give me a hand with Napoleon here?"

"You named a pony Napoleon?" Van Pelt grinned. The animal was just too darn cute.

"Of course not. Someone else named him Napoleon."

Rigsby took the reins and Jane took hold of the bridle, and together they managed to budge the pony a few inches. Unfortunately, Napoleon had decided that he liked his current position and sat down, eyeing them with a baleful expression. "This isn't working," Rigsby grunted.

"We need to get him into her office before she gets back. Cho, can you help?"

Obligingly, Cho set down his pen and stood up, muttering something about blazing idiots.

Several minutes later, Virgil Minelli stepped out of his office – with the case closed, Lisbon was out finishing up a last interview before coming back to hand him the official documents – to find her team. They had performed well and he thought they deserved congratulations.

He opened his door to see Jane, Cho and Rigsby pulling at the reins of a small pony, as Van Pelt dangled a few carrot sticks in front of its nose.

Seeing him, they all froze, looking uneasily between him and Jane. Minelli blinked, opened his mouth, shut it again, and finally said, "I don't even want to know." With that, he disappeared back into his office. Just when he thought they were all sane.

Whatever the hell was going on, it had to be Jane's fault.

Author's Note: Do you want to be happy? Go to youtube and search "euphoria love you right." Shades of the early 90's. Plus: one of the two shirtless guys dancing around the microphone is the one and only SBaker. No lie, it totally made my day. Enjoy.