Disclaimer: I don't own Torchwood, though I do wish I did. I only own Lydia Martel, Isabella, Evan and Cari and any other characters mentioned that are obviously not a part of the tv show.

"I feel the beating of your heart
I see the shadows of your face
Just know wherever you are,
Yeah, I miss you
And I wish you were here"

'From Where You Are' by Lifehouse

There they were. Three of the four people I've ever loved in my life. They were looking at me, smiling those big smiles. And I just stood there watching. They held their arms out to me, waiting for me to run to them, hug and kiss them. And I did. But by the time I had reached them, they were gone. No more. I looked around, calling their names, but no one called back. I was alone. Completely alone.

I woke up with a start. It was the same dream every time I fell asleep. Every time I thought I was free of them, their faces, their haunting pale faces, they caught me back up again, making my throat close up and my eyes tear.

I looked at the clock. It was 6:32. Two hours before I needed to wake up. I pulled on some sweats and a t-shirt, sliding my sneakers on and heading out for a run. The cold april air bit my cheeks as I ran down the sidewalk, trying to run off the pain of remembering.

Seven years earlier, I was living in Cardiff, Wales. I was twenty-two, happy, and in love. But then my love was shot. He had been trying to stop a robbery and was shot right in front of me. The robber ran off, leaving me with my bleeding boyfriend. He died in my arms and was quickly taken away by the police. The next day, they called to let me know that his body had gone missing. They suspected someone had stolen the body, thinking that whoever had taken it could sell the valuable body parts on the black market while they were still fresh.

It was three weeks after his death when I realised I was pregnant. Five weeks pregnant to be exact. I was so happy, so happy that I had at least one thing to hold on to in life.

The pregnancy wasn't easy. My mother called me a tramp, saying I was a whore for letting a man that I wasn't married to put his hands all over me. But I had stopped learning to care about her opinion long before. My siblings helped me out. Evan, my older brother, and Cari, my little sister, made sure I was constantly comfortable. They were both so excited for me.

When I gave birth, and they handed me this little small child. This baby girl that I had longed to hold for so long, I fell in love with her. She was my small girl, my precious child. My Isabella. And no one would ever take her away from me. Not if I could stop it.

I got a job at a cafe. Working noon to closing time six days a week. Sundays were my day off. My time with Isabella.

It lasted four months.

Cari was babysitting Isabella. She was on her way back to my house, about to drop her off like she always did, when a car drove through a red light and hit them straight on. The police told me that they were both dead instantly. My little sister, and my precious little darling baby. I would never get either of them back, ever.

It had been eight months after my boyfriend died, that our child was born. Four months and that same child was dead, along with my lovely little sister.

My father had died when I was three, and my mother was a mean old witch who only cared about what people thought. That left my brother Evan.

I only had Evan left, out of everyone, and he was the only thing that kept me going. The two of us moved to London for five years, but his job needed him to be back in Cardiff, so I went with him, unable to live without seeing him every day. Though he understood my pain, I could tell that at the same time he didn't. Every once and a while he would bring up the idea of me dating again, or even going out without him needing to come get me. But I couldn't do it. It just hurt too much. Running in the morning was the most I could do on my own, and even that was a stretch at times.

Every where I went, I saw their faces. It hurt too much to look, so I just stayed indoors for the most part. I couldn't look or I'd remember, and remembering hurt too much for me to bear.

As I ran, I heard sirens. I heard their call. Their loud, blaring, exciting call that signifize danger lurking nearby. I ran faster, alongside the path that lights and noises traveled to. For once, I was ready to see what was out there, in the real world. For once since that fateful day, I wanted to see danger and not run away.

So I ran faster. My legs pushing against the ground, the sights and sounds and smells of the street racing by as I hurried to catch up with the police cars.

And then I was there, standing in a crowd of other people passing by, wondering what was going on. I stood in the middle of the crowd, looking on to a scene. It was a murder, in the back of an alley. Two women, killed and thrown in trash cans. People whispered, some who knew the women cried. Police were pushing people back so they could put up the police tape that everyone recognized from some point in their lives or other. A black SUV drove up, the words TORCHWOOD imprinted on the side.

I glanced at the car as a team stepped out, two women and three men pushing past the crowd, and being let in to the crime scene. I breathed in the sights of life and death around me, a bit terrified to be surrounded by so many strangers, and at the same time thrilled. I had gone outside, chased down a police car to a crime scene, and stood among a crowd of strangers. Oh, wait till I tell Evan.

Something caught my eye as I meant to leave. One of the Torchwood guys. He looked familiar. Too familiar for comfort. I could only see the back of his head, the rest obscured by the crowd in front me. But then he turned, and I knew who it was.

Memories rushed through my brain, painful thoughts that shouldn't be known, and I knew.

Jack.

The love of my life. Father of my dead darling girl.

But he was dead.

My dead Jack was alive. And working. And seemingly fine.

And as I took a shuddering step back, he turned, and his eyes found mine, almost as if he could feel me.

His beautiful eyes widened with surprise and shock, mirroring my own, and I was gone before he could move again.

Hope you liked the first chapter. Please review! Thanks