Disclaimer: If I owned Vampire Knight it would just be a series of stickmen being pelted by rockets, occasionally wearing capes. Nuff said ;).

Never Be the Same

Headmaster Cross' POV

"Headmaster he hasn't moved all day and won't touch his food. I'm getting really worried now." Yuuki frowned.

"Is there anything else? Has he said anything?"

"Oh yeah! Zero won't say a word while I'm in the room but as soon as I leave I can hear him muttering to himself, repeating a name. Kaname."

"Really?" I could honestly say I was shocked – I was under the impression that they strongly disliked each other.

"Well then it would be best for Zero if we get Kaname to him. Yuuki have you any idea why Zero might want that?"

"No I'm not sure. Should I fetch him from class?"

"Go back to your guardian duties Yuuki, I'll do it. We need to keep up an atmosphere of normalcy for both the day and night classes." Smiling reassuringly at her, I sent her on her way and left myself for the night class. As I stepped out the door an icy wind almost tore the scarf right off my neck. Right what was I doing? Ah yes – Kaname!

I held on to my scarf and battled through the wind to the school building where the night class were currently having a lecture on social etiquette.

"Excuse me Professor Pertra, please could I have a quick word with Kaname Kuran?"

"Of course Headmaster Cross!"

Kaname stood up and walked quite a long way down the corridor (presumably so none of his fellow vampires could eavesdrop.

"Is there a problem Headmaster?"

"It's Zero. He refuses to eat, drink – even move! Yuuki and I are becoming incredibly worried. Also he keeps on calling for you. As soon as she leaves the room he begins to mutter your name and won't stop until somebody enters again so I was wondering, if it is not too much of an inconvenience, would you please go have a word with Zero? I fear you are the only one who might gain a reaction from him."

"Of course headmaster. Please, lead the way."

Oh thank goodness! Kaname and I returned to my wing and separated at Zero's door.

Kaname's POV

"Zero?"

I gently knocked on the white door waiting for any response. None, of course. Nevertheless I swung the door open and stepped into a pitch-black room where a body-shaped lump rested on the bed. Just as the headmaster had said on the way to his wing, the prefect was on his bed unmoving and seemingly unaware of what was happening around him. His pale skin gleamed with a light coating of sweat while his eyes remained unblinking. I flicked on the light.

"Hello?" I crouched down right in front of him brushing the hair out of his face so he might actually be able to see me. Zero suddenly jerked with surprise and his eyes widened almost comically once he caught sight of me.

"Wh-what are you doing here?"

"Better question: what are you doing here? You should be outside or at the very minimum washed. So what is the problem?"

"Why? It's not like I'll ever be clean again…"

Ah so it isn't just that he's too lazy to get up and shower but a mental problem. I could deal with that considering I've had a fair share of my own breakdowns. For some unexplainable reason I had the urge to share my deepest most darkest secret with the irritating boy. Nobody knows about this, not even Takuma.

"Zero I'm going to tell you something about myself that I have never spoken to anybody about. Can you promise to keep this a secret between the two of us?" He nodded and met my gaze curiously.

I sighed. "I…was also raped." As expected Zero's mouth dropped open in shock.

"Yes I do not blame you for finding it shocking. If anybody else knew they would most likely have a heart attack however, I digress. The…event happened whilst I was under the temporary guardianship of Asato Ichijo – I was fourteen."

"What happened?"

"To be honest I can not recall the events leading up to it clearly. Presumably I angered Asato. I have no problems remembering what happened next. We were in his office at the time and were sat opposite each other with his grand oak desk between us where I was reading a document on the profits a company of mine was making. The next thing I was aware of I was being forcefully bent over said desk while Ichiou was wrestling with my belt."

"But you're a pureblood. Couldn't you have shaken him off?" He had propped himself up now, fully consumed by my past.

"That's what I tried to do. Unfortunately it dawned on me that Ichiou must have slipped something into my drink to block off my extensive strength and powers while I was seeing to my companies. So there I was helpless with my trousers by my ankles with only the faintest idea of what would happen next." I shuddered as the memories came flashing back. "It hurt so much." A single tear rolled down my cheek; I quickly wiped it away although I was sure Zero saw it.

"Zero just like I managed to, I need you to be strong. Yuuki needs you to protect her more than ever from doing something foolish and only you can do it."

"I can't… How did you manage to get over it? When somebody you have known for so long and trust does something so destructive it changes your whole life - and I can't move on."

If this does not make him laugh I don't know what will.

"Every day I kept a belief that there was somebody out there that could cleanse me, love me for all my talents and faults – somebody who could love me for me and not my high status. I still believe that."

"Lucky you. Nobody would ever want me; practically everybody I know hates me on sight for whatever reason they come up with. My chances were slim before but now I might as well just crawl under a rock."

"There is somebody out there for everybody Zero, just be patient." He looked away and nodded slightly. This prefect really believed nobody liked him yet I couldn't imagine why (apart from his obvious attitude problem). Most people he meets only judge him by his status of either a vampire hunter or an ex-human; honestly I would probably give up if I were in his position.

And he thinks now that we have talked he could still sit there. I don't think so. "Get up. Please at least do me and my sensitive nose a favour and wash. You can not sit here all night." Again he nodded so I helped him ease out of his bed and to his feet. Zero walked to the bathroom on shaky legs. As soon as the thunder of water hitting the bottom of the shower echoed down the hall I relaxed a little. I suppose I should make myself useful.

While Zero took his shower I cautiously made my way around the hunter's room (God knows what he could have hidden in here) and gathered up his spare Day Class uniform. You have no idea how shocked I was to find he actually had a spare!

Eventually the prefect returned with dripping hair and a towel wrapped securely around his waist. Before he could protest I sat him down on the edge of his bed and re-bound his wounds as gently as possible. Standing, I gestured towards the uniform I had left on his bed and leant against the wall.

"Do you have to watch me change?" Zero snapped, noticing I had not turned around when he has begun to dress.

"Zero it hardly matters now considering I washed you yesterday." I stated, folding my arms and silently refusing to turn away from the blushing prefect while secretly cheering for the return of the hunter's unbeatable sniping attitude.

"Fine – watch me if you have to."

For some odd reason I couldn't resist staring as the day class uniform covered the creamy skin. Not that I would ever admit it out loud but disappointment shot through me when the show was over: Zero must have planted something in his room to mess with my sanity.

"I guess I'd better go see Yuuki and make sure she's not freaking out too much," Zero sighed.

"Not yet you're not," I frowned. "I refuse to make the same mistake twice."

"What?"

As I unbuttoned the top of my shirt and pulled off my tie realisation dawned on Zero. Before he could even think of refusing I dragged my sharp fingernails along my neck making a thin trail of blood appear. Unsurprisingly Zero was right in front of me within seconds latched onto my neck. At least now there was a much higher chance of him being able to defend himself if Ichiru dared to return. With Zero pressed against me drinking heavily I swore that I would to whatever it took to help Zero no matter what.

"It will get better now. I promise."

Edited: 06-8-11