Lady Morgana lying naked on a bed of leaves in the woods was definitely not something Merlin was looking at.

"Good morning, my lady," he said, without looking. He was just going to stand here and stare into the middle distance and hold the dress out to Morgana. And if had peeked, which he hadn't, it would only have been for a second and only so he knew which direction to aim the dress in.

Morgana snatched the green dress out of his hand and growled something inaudible, Merlin chose to interpret it as 'Good morning, Merlin, thank you for bringing me some clothes.' Morgana was always in a foul mood the morning after a transformation.

Morgana and Merlin made their way up to the castle, Morgana picking leaves out of her hair the whole way.

"Gwen's started giving me funny looks," Merlin said. "When I go to your chambers the morning after the full moon to ask for one of your dresses, she looks at me strangely."

"Yes, well," said Morgana, who currently had twigs where noblewomen weren't meant to have twigs, "she probably thinks you're wearing them."

"I..."

"What, Merlin?"

"I was just thinking thank goodness I never ask for undergarments."

"Merlin!" came the dulcet tones of prince Arthur, who was striding towards them. Morgana made her excuses and went to have a long hot bath and check she hadn't eaten anyone the previous evening.

"I heard a rumour about you, Merlin," said Arthur.

"If it's the one about me wearing Morgana's clothes then there's a good explanation for that."

Arthur was stunned into silence, but not for long. "I was going to say that I'd heard a rumour that you were actually my manservant but yours is much better. Yes, I must see that it gets round the castle."

"No, Arthur, please..."

Merlin had only been in Camelot a week when he'd discovered the rumours about Lady Morgana being a monster at a certain time of the month were rather less sexist and rather more literal than he'd imagined.

He careered through the door to Gaius's study, tripped over a thoughtlessly placed mop and crashed onto the floor. "Wolf! There's a wolf!"

"Oh, yes," said Gaius, dipping a quill into a pot of ink, "where?"

"Under the castle, a great big wolf!"

Gaius looked out the window at the full moon. "Yes, that will be the Lady Morgana."

Merlin opened his mouth to point out that he'd said 'wolf' and not 'king's ward,' Gaius was old and it couldn't be that difficult a mistake to make. But, now that he thought about it, most wolves weren't the size of the one downstairs, and most of them didn't have eyebrows they could arch diabolically at Merlin.

"I always knew Morgana would have some kind of mystical ability," Gaius continued, "impossible not to with her mother. But I had hoped she would be a seer or something easier to disguise. As it is I have to lace Uther's supper with a sleeping draught every full moon so that he doesn't wake and discover Morgana roaming the castle grounds."

"Doesn't anyone else know?" Merlin asked.

"Merlin, allow me to ask you a question: what were you doing in the dungeon?"

"I was talking to the, uh, dragon..."

"And it surprises you that no one has noticed Morgana's condition?" And with that Gaius had handed him a dense volume on lycanthropy and returned to his work.

Merlin snuck into Morgana's chambers when both she and Gwen were out, he stripped out of his clothes, sat on Morgana's bed and waited.

When Morgana returned she found a skinny brown cat with over-large ears sitting on her bed atop a pile of Merlin's clothes.

She smiled fondly at the cat. "I see," she said, "you've transformed yourself into an animal so you can spend the full moon with me?"

"Miaow," Merlin confirmed.

"Merlin, did I ever tell you that before my transformations began the castle was absolutely over-run with stray cats?"

Merlin turned back into a human with a pop. "I can also transform myself into a rabbit?"

"And if you can transform yourself into some vegetables and a goblet of wine at the same time you can disguise yourself as my evening meal."

"My lady, I-" Gwen came to an abrupt halt when she was confronted with Merlin sitting naked on Morgana's bed.

"Oh, never mind Merlin, Gwen. He's here to borrow a dress."

Merlin could have come up with a snappy response but he was too busy being naked.

Arthur stood, sword drawn, shoulder to shoulder with the knights of the realm, ready to face down the two headed lizard.

The knights started to charge, and a dark shape leapt from the tree line and snatched up the lizard. Somewhere in the woods the knights could hear the sounds of a two headed lizard reconsidering its life choices.

"What was that?" demanded Arthur.

"Well, it certainly wasn't Lady Morgana feeling territorial," said Merlin. "Nope, certainly not."

Merlin was absolutely not looking at Morgana while she was naked, he wasn't planning on going the same way as the lizard.

"I'm over here, Merlin." Merlin aimed the dress in the direction of Morgana's voice without opening his eyes.

"Your red dress this morning," Merlin explained, "it'll make the blood less noticeable."

"Where did the blood come from?"

Merlin thought back to the lizards remains. "Er, that depends. Morgana, how do you feel about exotic food?"