Disclaimer: I do not own Total Drama Island. (Is it just me, or do I repeat myself a lot?)

"What's a Decepticon?" Lindsay asked the table. Harold and Cody stared at her in disbelief while Noah started to laugh hysterically.

"Malibu Barbie wouldn't know that kind of thing!" Noah said, chuckling.

Lindsay pouted. "I would know if you'd just explain it to me! Whenever I ask a question, you guys don't answer."

"We just can't believe you don't know that kind of thing," Cody explained.

"Seriously," Harold said.

"Just go fry your hair some more, Barbie," Noah said.

She crossed her arms and stalked away. "Meanies!" she yelled at them. Noah snickered.

"Beth, where are you?" Lindsay called. She looked around the plaza of the Playa de Losers. "Beth?"

"Lindsay?" Beth stuck her head around the back of the armchair she was sitting in. She caught sight of Lindsay and flashed her a brace-less smile.

Lindsay walked closer to her BFFF. "Beth, I need some friend advice. You know, friend to friend."

Beth put down her book and paid full attention to Lindsay. "Shoot."

Lindsay took a deep breath. "Well, I have this guy that I like-"

"Noah," Beth interrupted her.

Lindsay looked shocked. "How did you know?"

"I have psychic powers!" Beth started humming the Twilight Zone theme. "Just joking," she said quickly when she saw Lindsay's confused expression. "No, I just noticed that you're always hanging around him. Actually, everyone's noticed it."

"Really?" Lindsay asked.

"Well, except Noah. You think he'd have noticed it when you tried to protect him from that bear in the second season. Or when you had to kiss him for that challenge in the third season. Or in the episode where you were kicked off in this season when you clung onto him when Chris tried to kick you off the island. Or-"

"Stop it! I get the point," Lindsay said. She frowned. "I thought I was subtle."

Beth gave her a surprised look. "Nice word!"

Lindsay giggled. "I think he's rubbing off on me."

"You sure that's a good thing?"

"Don't talk mean about him! He's really nice, and smart, and funny!"

Beth held her hands up in an "I surrender" pose. "Sorry, sorry. What did you want advice for exactly?"

Lindsay sighed. "Well, he doesn't exactly pay very much attention to me. Am I not pretty enough? Should I show more cleavage?"

"Lindsay, you're really pretty! No more cleavage. Remember what your dad said about your outfit on the third season."

"But I wanted Noah to pay attention to meeee!" Lindsay whined. "And then I was stuck in that getup for the whole season because of that stupid contract. I still don't get why we had to wear the same thing every day."

"Why they did that I will never know," Beth said. "But what do you and Noah talk about?"

"Not much," Lindsay admitted. "Whenever I talk to him he ends up getting mad at me. I don't think we have very much in common."

Suddenly, an idea occurred to Beth and her face lit up. "We can fix that," she said slowly. She nods slowly, a devious smile growing on her face. "How badly do you want Noah to like you?"

"I'll do anything," Lindsay says without hesitation.

"Then I'll need some help. She might be the best choice," Beth thought.

Harold, Cody, and Noah were lounging on the beach chairs that were near the pool. "You know, Lindsay hasn't been hanging around us recently," Harold commented.

"You're right! I kind of miss the eye candy," Cody mused.

Noah rolled his eyes. "Why am I friends with them again? Oh wait, I actually like them." He sighed internally. "Thankfully, except for comments like that, they can be pretty fun to hang out with. After I got Harold to stop talking about prairie animals I found out that he actually has something in common with me."

"I actually haven't seen her at all in the past few days," Harold said. "Noah, do you know anything about it?"

Noah gave Harold a weird look. "Why would I know?"

"Dude, the only reason she hangs with us is because of you."

Noah laughed. "You're kidding right?" He looked at his friends' dead serious faces. "They're kidding, right?"

"Not good enough!" Izzy yelled. She cackled and rubbed her hands together. "Back to the beginning!"

Lindsay was too tired to complain. She stared at the screen, panting. She moved her right foot first and started to hit the arrows that showed on the screen in the sequence that they appeared.

"Now I'm getting worried," Noah thought. "I haven't seen hair nor hide of Lindsay for a week now. She hasn't even come down to eat anything. I haven't seen Izzy either. This is really suspicious."

"Just one more song! If you finish this one, you can eat," Izzy told Lindsay. She held up a burger tauntingly. Lindsay looked at it longingly. Izzy pressed a button on the guitar Lindsay was holding and selected Through the Fire and Flames. "Go for it." Lindsay stared at the screen, determined to get 100% before the day was out.

"This is just weird. I haven't seen her for two weeks now!" Noah thought. He pounded on Lindsay's door. "Lindsay?" he called. There was no answer.

Izzy adjusted her fake glasses and read from a book. "When and where was Shakespeare born?" she asked.

Lindsay smiled confidently. "He is believed to have been born in Stratford- upon- Avon in his parents' house. While his exact birth date is not known, it is a custom in Elizabethan society to have their children baptized three days after their birth. Thus, his birthday has been set as April 23, 1864."

"Correct," Izzy said sternly. "What are two themes of the play, Hamlet?"

"Erm," Lindsay said slowly.

"Wrong!" Izzy shouted. She smacked the desk Lindsay was sitting in with a ruler. It made a loud thwack that made Lindsay jump. "Ten Chuck Norris's!"

Lindsay stood up. "One- If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money. Two- Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise. Three- Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird. Four- Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding. Five- Chuck Norris does not sleep." She took a deep breath and continued.

"He waits. Six- Chuck Norris does not "style" his hair. It lays perfectly in place out of sheer terror. Seven- Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs. Eight- Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost. Nine- When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down. Ten- The original draft of The Lord of the Rings featured Chuck Norris instead of Frodo Baggins. It was only 5 pages long, as Chuck roundhouse-kicked Sauron's ass halfway through the first chapter." She smiled at Izzy hopefully.

Izzy smirked. "You have done well young grasshopper."

"Three weeks," he thought. "That's pushing it. Maybe I could call someone for help?" He saw Courtney walking down the halls brandishing a candelabra. "So that's why I haven't seen Harold today. God, the girl can't let go of a grudge!" He waved. "Hey, Courtney, do you know where there's a pay phone?"

She paused for a moment. "Chris took the thing out after Duncan made a prank call to the police claiming that he was being held captive here." She rolls her eyes and smiles fondly at the same time.

"Well, who would I call anyway?"he thought.

Lindsay stared at the screen intently. "Enjoying the show? Dollhouse is good, isn't it?" Izzy asked.

"It's actually pretty interesting," Lindsay commented.

"Make sure you pay attention. You have to log on to a chat room later and have an intelligent conversation afterwards. Otherwise…" Izzy paused and grinned maniacally. "You don't get to eat."

"Beth?" Noah knocked on Beth's door. "Are you there?"

The door opened a crack and Beth stuck her head out. "What do you want Noah?" she asked.

"Oh, great. I don't even know what to say. What exactly am I so worried about here? It's not like I care," Noah thought.

He hesitated for a moment. "Umm, never mind."As she closed the door he caught sight of a large mannequin in the center of her room. "What is she doing?" he thought.

"What does SOF stand for?" Izzy asked.

"Soldier of Fortune. Duh," Lindsay said sarcastically.

"Sarcasm. Extra two points." Izzy nodded appreciatively. She turned to Beth. "I think she's ready."

"Do I get to eat now?" Lindsay asked hopefully.

"Not yet," Izzy replied. "We still have to give you a makeover and style tips." Lindsay sighed.

Beth gasped. "She's not excited about a makeover? What did you do to her Izzy?"

"That's why I didn't let you watch her training," Izzy muttered. Beth glared at her.

Beth unlocked the door to her room. "Tah dah!" she yelled. Lindsay looked at the mannequin in the room in amazement. "I kind of modified the geeky theme so that it wouldn't look like a total change from before…."

"Wow, Beth, you are such a budding fashionista!" she said.

"That didn't sound right," Beth said.

Lindsay cringed away from Izzy. Beth glared at Izzy. Izzy shrugged. "What?" she asked. "She didn't complain."

Noah absentmindedly ate his cornflakes, staring off into the distance.

"Noah, what do you think?" Cody asked. "Noah? Hello, earth to Noah!"

"What?" Noah asked.

"Don't expect anything. You won't get a coherent answer out of him even when you've got his attention," Harold said to Cody. "Lindsay being missing is really bothering him."

"You know I can hear you, right?" Noah said, slightly annoyed.

"Hey, you haven't been paying attention to anything we've been saying recently," Harold said. "But anyway, we-" His voice trailed off. His eyes got as big as saucers as he stared at something behind Noah's back. Cody saw the same thing as Harold and had the same reaction.

"Guys? What?" Noah asked. He turned around and saw what had shocked them so much.

Lindsay was walking towards them looking very……. different to say the least. Her large blue eyes were partially hidden behind a pair of plastic frame glasses. She was wearing an orange t-shirt with the neck cut off that said Vote for Pedro and a black layered skirt. Her usual cowboy boots were gone and in their place were a pair of orange high top Converse. To top it all off, she had on a black fleece hat with cat ears. She sat at the table next to Noah, unaware of the fact that every eye in the room was trained on her. "Hey guys! Did you miss me?" she asked.

"You disappeared," Noah said slowly. He was having a small problem getting his brain to function. Cody and Harold had lost all ability to talk coherently.

"Well, absence makes the heart grow fonder," Lindsay remarked casually. Everyone's mouths dropped open.

"Since when does Lindsay say stuff like that?" Noah thought.

A/N: Wow, I'm not doing too well here. I just started a new story. I started another new one last week. I worked on that on all week and ignored all my other stories. Then, I became really busy this weekend and didn't have an entire day to catch up with all of my stories. GAH! I need to write all my other stories...... And then I came up with this idea :)

Just a note for those who want everything to make sense. (Not me but hey, whatever you want.) In this story, TDA does not exist. It is a totally different set of seasons with different drama and stuff. That I might get into later.

Man, I like Lindsay in fanon couplings too much. First my Trindsay, then my Zesay (Zeke/Lindsay... whatever that's called), and now this? I need to finish both of the stories with her in them QUICKLY because I meant for all of them to be one-shots. This one ended up having a point where I wanted to make a new chapter..... I'm planning on doing all the other chapters in a different format, becuase this was the set-up chapter. My other story..... don't get me started on that one. I've gotten stuck. I hope to finish it sooooometime.

(Hey, if you actually read that rant above here, I give you kudos. YAY! Good for you. :o You're amazing.)

Here's the link for the hat that Lindsay's wearing- www. /products /fleecehat

Remember, the whole thing is black.