Disclaimer: I don't own Love Hina. Please. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!

Sidenote: I damn it all to hell. This is a complete just-for-fun fanfic. Not to be taken seriously. Just enjoy the insanity. Although is it really that insane?

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"Good morning everyone…" mumbled Keitaro as he slumped into his chair.

"Damn Keitaro, you look like hell," stated Kitsune, who had just recently performed a miracle feat by opening one of her eyes to look at Keitaro. To say Keitaro looked like hell was to say the least.

Keitaro's clothes were torn in several places, and they seemed to sag along with Keitaro. Keitaro's face looked even worse. He had bags under his eyes, his eyes seemed tired, and his nose had dried blood all over it. He had plenty of scratches all over his face, and a nice, long gash along the side of his face. It had long stopped bleeding, but it still caught the attention of all the girls in the kitchen. Unfortunately, the only girl who wasn't there was Naru. Which was a shame, because then she would see what her actions did to Keitaro. But then Keitaro pushed his chair back, and the girls looked at his legs. They were full of scratches and blood.

"What happened to you Urashima?" asked Keitaro, pausing to look Keitaro over once more. Her voice was full of genuine concern.

"Well…let me explain. Naru sent me flying again-"

"Did you do something perverted again?" teased Kitsune. Keitaro sighed, however, and answered,

"I went up to her room, knocked, and she told me to come in. I came in, but I find that she's half naked. She must of forgotten that she was half-naked, but when I mentioned it to her, she completely freaked out and punched me out of her room. She broke my nose too.

Anyway, she sent me flying, and I landed in a pile of bushes. Most unfortunate for me, they had thorns. Loads and loads of thorns. Millions of them. That explains all the scratches on my face and legs. I managed to get all of them out, and then slapped at a bag who was near me. It turned out to be a wasp, and stung me several times before I finally managed to kill the little bastard. But then another one comes and stings me too." Keitaro rolls up his sleeves and shows the bumps on his arms that must have come from the wasp stings. "As I was walking home, guess what? You will never believe me. I got mauled by a freaking bear. I managed to get the hell out of there before it did any real serious damage to me, but it gave me this nice gash running up the side of my face." Keitaro pointed to said gash.

"I proceeded to go home as was planned, but wouldn't you know it? I got hit by a crazy truck! Damn driver was speeding, and couldn't stop in time. So I was sent sprawling to the other side of the street. I think I broke my elbow, it's still throbbing like crazy. I eventually made it back here. I'm amazed that I came here in one piece." Keitaro finished his story, and everyone looked with Keitaro. Kitsune performed another miracle feat, and opened both of her eyes.

"But that doesn't explain the bags under your eyes sempai…" Shinobu added, wondering why her sempai looked so tired.

"Oh yeah…that." Keitaro sighed, then took a deep breath, and explained.

"I haven't slept for three nights in a row. I'm going for a new personal record. I've managed to stay awake for more than 60 hours." Keitaro took a break to yawn, but continued, "I think that I beat my record already, but the more hours the better."

All of the girls began to return to their regular early morning routines, when Keitaro did something that caught their attention. He turned to his side, and said, "No I am not going crazy."

"Urashima? Who are you talking to?" asked Motoko, truly worried if Keitaro was going insane.

"What do you mean? Can't you see the giant talking cupcake next to me?" asked Keitaro. Nobody could tell if he was joking, or if he wasn't. "MMMMM…cupcakes. I like cupcakes." What Keitaro did next surprised everyone greatly.

Keitaro leapt from his seat to Kitsune, and began licking her face. Motoko took out Kitsune's video camera, and began recording the scene before her.

"You taste good…vanilla cupcake…mmmm." Keitaro licked Kitsune even more vigorously. "But I think I want some ice cream now! I love vanilla ice cream!" Keitaro went from Kitsune to Shinobu. Soon he was licking her face too, along with her hair. Shinobu had gone completely red, and she froze. Kitsune was blushing as well, but she went to Motoko and took her camera back. She continued recording Keitaro, laughing along the way.

"AH! I'm so full! That tasted good!" announced Keitaro. He stopped licking Shinobu, and walked away to Su. He hugged her, and shouted, "God I love all of you guys. You're all my best friends! I love you all. WHOA! I CAN SEE THE AIR!"

Keitaro ran out of the room, heading towards the lounge. Everyone chased him, with Kitsune leading, Motoko running after, then Su and Shinobu. Although she had unfrozen, her blush was still a deep red. Keitaro ran down the stairs, entering the lounge. He ran towards the couch, but tripped on a chair, and fell down.

Kitsune jumped over his body, but Motoko didn't. She tripped on Keitaro, but he grabbed her arms and rolled with her. Shinobu and Su stopped running just in time. Keitaro and Motoko rolled to a stop a bit farther, with Motoko on top of Keitaro.

"I love you so much Motoko. I love you so so so much. Kiss…kiss me." Keitaro pulled Motoko closer and closer. He gave her a quick kiss on her lips. Then he gave her a longer one.

Their mouths melted together, and they were lost in their own little world. But soon, Motoko heard snoring. She broke the kiss, and noticed that Keitaro had fallen asleep.

"Why Motoko. I never knew that you kissed people while they slept. What a pervert," teased Kitsune, glad to have caught everything on tape.

"Uh…heh heh?" Motoko, ignoring the others, placed a pillow under Keitaro's head, and laid a blanket over him daintily. "Let's let him sleep. He must be really tired."

"Sure. Come on everyone. Let's go," Kitsune said ecstatically.

For the rest of that day, no one entered the lounge. Not even Naru. They all let Keitaro get his sleep.

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Keitaro awoke the next day, not aware of any of the things he had done the day before. He went to his room to get changed, took a small break to see is he could remember what he did the day before. He left for the dining room, having failed at trying to remember. He found everyone there.

"Good morning," Keitaro said. All of the girls blushed at seeing Keitaro, except Naru who was clueless.

"Everone! I want to show you something I recorded something yesterday!"

Shinobu, Su, and Motoko grinned when they heard Kitsune announce that.

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Once they were all seated comfortably in the lounge, Kitsune hooked up her camera to the TV and pressed play. On the screen, everyone witnessed the events that had happened before. Everyone looked at Keitaro when he kissed Motoko. Keitaro shook his head, laughed, then said,

"Damn it all to hell…"

End

Author Note: This was actually pretty fun to write. I think I'll do something like this again sometime in the future. Thanks for reading. So review! Any tips and constructive criticism is happily welcomed! Rants are too, as long as they make sense.