What really happened to Faye at Ballad of the Fallen Angels, as she waited for Spike? This is angst and before she knew of her past. I warn you, it contains spoilers. I do not own Cowboy Bebop or any of the characters here. (I wish I did! Eeee!) Anyway, please comment. This has some angst and the bastard-ness which is Vicious! :D Enjoy!



Do You Feel What I Feel

By: Mizuno Akiko

Faye's hands were tied to the pole of the old church. She could smell the mold within the old wood, and the ancient smell of smoke from incense long ago.

Her heart beat rapidly, speeding like a deer that had been cornered. For once, Faye Valentine was not in control. And Faye Valentine did not like the feeling. Not in the slightest bit.

She heard the shuffling of mens feet along the old plywood. They hadn't harmed her…yet. Oh, Jesus Spike, get here soon!

Maybe…maybe he wasn't serious. Maybe he wouldn't come. Her emerald eyes narrowed to the heavy darkness that was settled around her. She was a nobody after all. A woman with no past and a lot of debts. She had tricked them countless times, used them to her advantage and was a liability. Still, he had to come! She couldn't die here…no, not yet.

She heard the cry of a bird, and jerked her head to the side….to see silvery hair gleaming under the light of the stained glass. The stained glass…it was so beautiful, for a moment it made her forget. For a moment she wasn't afraid as the colors poured over her body.

But another caw caught her attention once more, shattering that one moment of peace. "Vicious…" his name struck fear in her being, like no other name would ever do.

His eyes…were so empty so void of emotion that they could have belonged to a marble gargoyle. Beauty in a venerated, fallen way, the angel Lucifer he seemed to be. Once the most beautiful and glorious angel in heaven…reduced to this, a cold-blooded man out for blood.

"Faye…" he spoke her name and she shuttered involuntarily. She felt her chest rise and swell and quickly went back down. He seemed not to really see Faye; it was more like…he was trapped beneath a curtain of blood and anger. Something he couldn't wash away.

"Look, I…." She didn't know what to say, in all honesty. The indestructible Faye at a loss for words.

"So you have no past." He interrupted her words with his cool and callus voice, stepping forward. His bird flapped its giant wings, seeming to cry…maybe the bird was his way to cry. Maybe.

"What…?" Faye was startled into speech, her eyes widening.

"You have no past." He repeated slowly, coming ever closer to stare into the fear filled jade eyes. "And still you try to find it, do you actually believe someone like you…would actually have a true past at all?"

That brought anger to Faye, and she hastily spoke with venom. "I had a past, and I intend to find it!"

Vicious smirked, an unsettling feature on his morbid face. "You're just like me, you are an angel who lost her wings so long ago."

"I am nothing like you!" Faye retorted, struggling against her bonds.

Vicious placed a hand beside her head, as his bird let out a screech, flying toward the rafters. His sudden motion shocked Faye into a frightened stand still.

"You are, and so is Spike." He whispered, leaning close to her. "You have nothing, and no one…and you know…. you're always hunting for blood." He lifted his hand to graze her cheek. Faye wanted to recoil, his hand was cold as the stone steps of the church.

"We both once loved an angel…with golden hair...and cornflower eyes.." his eyes became distant pools. "Who turned out to be a demon…" he leaned closer, his nose brushing her own. Faye felt her heart swell three times its normal size.

"Tell me," he said. "Are you a demon with dark hair and emerald eyes…who truly is an angel?"

Faye couldn't speak…no she couldn't breathe. Tears filled her eyes. How…could she know? She knew nothing, it was all a dream she'd never awaken from. Everything was just a survival…would she ever know?

His lips were a mere inch away, and Faye wanted to cry. No…I am no ones angel. "If you're like me!" she cried, making him pull back, silver hair brushing his face. "Don't you feel what I feel?" Confusion. Pain. Anger. The reasons to pretend?

He opened his mouth to speak, when a man shouted from above. "He's here! Sir, he is here!" Vicious glanced at the violet haired woman, and turned to the blond man who had caught her at the opera. "Take her, and show him how serious we are."

The man nodded, and Vicious merged with the shadows…Faye squinted to see...but saw nothing at all. Before she knew it, he had her hands behind her back…pushing her along...until she saw Spike.

He stood there, his face blank with those deep crimson eyes…which always made Faye so curious. He held a gun in those pale hands.

"Alright…we want you lower the gun slowly." The man said with slyness to his tone. Faye trembled, and let out a small grunt of fear and discomfort.

Spike did not lower the gun.

Panic. Panic. Please, Spike! She thought, give me a chance. I want to find myself… I want to know…

Spike raised the gun, his face set and determined…. And fired. Bang.





Um, and that is it. ^^ I always wondered what happened to Faye during her time alone with Vicious. So, there you have it. Feedback would be great. I know it sucked!