Kiss Me Now, Kiss Me Never

Chapter One – The Price of Three

Betaed by lisa89

***The beginning of this will confuse you, but please give it a chance***

Boston

"Beverly, you know how I feel about you. You know I do not wish to wed her." I sighed deeply, watching her chocolate brown eyes glaze over. "This was prearranged between my father and Becca's." It was devastating to watch the tears slip down her pale cheek, knowing that I was the cause of her pain. I hated myself for it.

"Oh, I see you are on first name basis with her now," she huffed, furiously wiping away her tears.

I snorted ungentlemanly and continued to pace among the forest trees. We were both risking so much by being here together. I would not ruin her reputation. She meant too much to me. I would not repay her love by having her spend the rest of her days unhappy.

I wanted her to be happy, even it would be without me. I knelt in front of her, ruining my freshly laundered tea-colored trousers. I took her hands in mine, which she wretched away from me quickly. I sighed again, regretting the words I would have to speak aloud.

"It is for the best, Beverly. It was not meant to be. I'm a Masen and you are a…Weatherby. Our families are worlds apart."

Her hands clenched into tiny fists before her right one flattened and struck me across the cheek, causing me to stumble backward.

"I said those very words to you months ago, and you said it did not matter. Now when someone better –" she spat, cutting herself off bitterly, rising to her feet. "Now you care about my name."

I hated myself for what I was about to do, but it had to be done. I would not soil her name just so that we could be together.

"You have heard of the men in my family tossing women aside like yesterday's papers," I said coldly. With every word I spoke, a tear formed in my heart.

Her eyes widened, and her cheeks flushed the loveliest shade of crimson before she stomped on my foot and ran off into the woods.

I howled in pain, watching as she ran deeper into the forest. "Bev! Stop! Come back!" I grunted, rising to my feet timidly. A loud peal of thunder roared in the night, followed by a brilliant white light that filled the darkened sky.

My heart pounded in my chest, matching the pace of my feet as I ran after Beverly. Rain pelted against my cold skin, and I was drenched within minutes. My beloved was out there because of me, and I knew that this would not end well. Her scream echoed among the trees as another crackle of thunder rumbled in the darkness. What have I done?

June 1998

I bolted straight up in my bed as thunder boomed through my window. I gasped for breath as I felt my pounding heart, trying to calm myself.

Yet another dream that made no sense to me. These nightly visions had plagued my mind for the past few weeks, and with every vision, the details seeped through my consciousness like running water in my hands. I could never hold on to more than a trickle. I quickly grabbed my journal from my nightstand, desperate to hold on to something.

I opened my notebook, and it fell open to my last entry. The only thing on that page was a pair of brown eyes that I had drawn. The detail was amazing; never had I drawn anything with such care.

I turned to a fresh page and wrote the date.

June 20, 1998

I remember her brown eyes and that the man let her run. No, he made her run from him. He screamed her name, but it was masked by the thunder. I heard it, though. It felt like I screamed it – Beverly.

I closed my journal, satisfied that I had remembered a little more. I had remembered a name. Though the man's eluded me, I felt that it wasn't as important as hers. I looked at the digital display on my alarm clock – happy fifteenth birthday to me.

I managed to sleep until the wee morning hours, but I was shaken awake by slamming doors coming from downstairs.

I sighed as I ran my hands through my hair. They were fighting again. As of late, it was a common occurrence for my parents to fight.

I wasn't even sure what the hell had been the catalyst. One morning they had gone from a loving, happy couple to a constantly bickering one.

I had always looked up to my parents' marriage. It had always appeared to be so perfect. Everything they did had been in perfect harmony with the other. She'd be singing her favorite song while cooking breakfast, and my father would be humming the same tune while dressing upstairs. They had never seemed to be aware of just how attuned they were to each other. Looking from the outside, you'd believe that they were soul mates.

Then two weeks ago, everything had changed. My mother had come out of their bedroom, crying and screaming. I had watched from the third floor landing, wondering what was going on.

"Esme," my father said, trying to keep up with her. "Please, Esme, you have to fight it. Remember the first night we met and –"

"Stop! I don't want to remember. None of it makes sense, why – how could I?"

"It's not real, Esme," my father pleaded, holding out his arms for her. My mother shook her head, and she turned away as if repulsed by his offer.

My father's arms fell to his sides, and I was able to see the warmth die from his topaz eyes.

"I'm sorry," he whispered in defeat.

Another door slammed shut as I heard muffled raised voices. I scrambled to my feet and carefully opened my bedroom door.

The muffled voices became clearer.

"Esme, please," my father said. "I'm so close –"

"It doesn't matter, Carlisle," my mother said firmly. "I can't stand it any longer."

"It's not real," my father said, repeating the words I'd heard two weeks earlier.

"It's real to me, Carlisle," my mother hissed at my father. "All I feel is this…all consuming hate." I clenched my fists. How could she? Why?

"What about Edward?" my father asked.

"Tell him everything. It may be the only way to save him from this heartache."

"I will tell him."

"Carlisle, make sure he knows why – I –" my mother stuttered and then cleared her throat. "Tell him I love him and that I'm sorry." The front door slammed closed, and I heard the crunch of the gravel as she drove away.

I heard my father's footsteps on the stairs and quickly ran to my bed. I heard him enter the room and turn on the lamp beside me.

"Edward," he said. "I know you're awake."

I turned to face him. "Why?"

Carlisle Cullen sighed, and for the first time, he looked his age. His eyes were weary, as was his face. His expression was one of calm but at the same time pained. He knew this day had been coming, and when it finally had, it had taken its toll on him.

"Son, I have to tell you a story," he began. "A story that has been passed down for generations…"

Ten Years Later

I sat on the plush leather couch in the VIP room of the club my buddy Jasper owned, Eclipse. Tanya had warmed up to me the minute I'd stepped into the club. She currently had her lips around my earlobe, her claws in my chest and a long leg wrapped around my hip.

Her lips continued their exploration, trying to meet mine. I turned away, seeking to avoid her kiss. She just didn't get it.

No one did. No one knew that I just didn't want to kiss them.

They all assumed that I was a Class A-asshole; what they didn't know was that I was doing them a goddamn favor.

I took a chug of my beer to avoid another one of her attempts at lip sabotage. Her nasally whine was whispered in my ear.

"Eddie," she purred. I winced. I really fucking hated that name. I looked over at my long-time friend Jasper, who was smirking, sitting across from me. My sweet baby cousin Alice sat on his lap, resting her head on his shoulder.

They were good together. Always had been, since they day they'd met. They reminded me so much of my parents, when they'd still been happily married.

They were fucking doomed.

Tanya increased her attempts and literally started to grind against me. I pushed her away and told her ass off. "Tanya, don't disrespect me like that in front of my family," I hissed.

"Yeah, Tanya," Alice quipped. "I don't want to see the color of your thong, or lack thereof."

I grimaced at the view that Alice must have been privy to for the last several minutes since Tanya had started to dry hump my leg. Jasper chuckled, causing Tanya's nails to dig into the skin of my chest. I hissed at her and glared.

"Then just take me home already," she whined again. I shook my head, because I knew I had to have her a little more under the influence. It was the only way I could ensure that I wouldn't have to kiss her.

Tanya ordered another drink while I finished off my beer. Jasper and Alice started to dance slowly, and completely oblivious to the fast beat of the music.

After another drink, Tanya continued with her attempts at seducing me. I had no idea why she was trying so damn hard. I had given her no reason to believe that I wasn't going to fuck her before the end of the night. I pushed her leg off when her thigh tried to coax my cock to attention. Silly girl. Nothing stirred me unless you were fucking naked and on your knees.

I shook my head at her, which only caused her to smirk. Fuck me, she thought I was fucking with her.

I could hear Alice whisper to Jasper. She knew what was coming. Tanya was a no go.

I smiled at Tanya and even nuzzled my nose along her neck. I kissed along her ear, breathing in the scent of stale roses and vanilla. My hands roamed over her curves – some were nice, others were a little bony. I kissed along her jaw and then once on each cheek. My lips descended on her slightly chapped lips once, twice, and for the final time.

Tanya tensed in my arms and slapped me hard. I smirked, because it worked every fucking time. She hissed at me and glared, trying to slap me again. I caught her hand and warned her not to do it again, but she kicked my shin, causing Jasper and Alice to roar in laughter. And then she was gone.

Good fucking riddance.

"Eddie," Alice teased. "Thanks for the entertainment." It was something that was always guaranteed when I was around.

"Bro, I don't understand why you just didn't take her home," Jasper said coolly, wrapping a protective arm around Alice.

"The same reason as with all the others," I stated matter-of-factly. "They get on my fucking nerves."

Jasper didn't know the truth, but he had suspected something was wrong with me. Alice knew, of course. She had been warned just like me; our first born sons could be at risk.

Alice looked at me, her eyes filled with sympathy. I didn't fucking need it. I had everything I'd ever wanted out of life. A successful career, my dream car and all the fucking pussy I needed.

Better yet, I had the perfect way to break up with them. It was easy and painless. Well, not completely painless. I'd been slapped, kicked, and almost ran over by a car on several occasions.

Like I said, I lived the perfect life. If only I believed that.

I got up to stretch, and I popped my neck a few times. I looked out onto the dance floor. It was time to find my next victim.

I, Edward Cullen, was cursed. I carried a curse that had been passed down generation to generation. When my lips pressed against another's three times, that person would hate me forever.

You think this wasn't a curse?

Tell that to the parade of women that ran from me after I'd tried to become intimate with them. The constant threats from said women, big brothers, fathers, and motherfucking restraining orders were all a part of the curse.

I, Edward Cullen, no longer kissed – I just fucked.