How am I supposed to function without him? Ever since the day he died, I've been looking for a way to tell the kids what really happened instead of just another excuse. For now, I don't have to worry about our little girl; she wasn't born when the incident occurred. Sky on the other hand was around 3 years old. He's 5 now and is starting to ask questions. He wants to know why daddy isn't there to tuck him in at night or why all the other kids' dads pick their kids up from school but his never can……

"Daddy just can't baby, but I promise that if he could then he would." I told him.

"But why not. Daddy doesn't come home anymore." He said, tears welling up in his little blue eyes.

"He just can't sweetpea." I whispered.

I want so much to be able to contact Time Force, have one of the others go back to that fateful day, and save my husband. To save my children from having to learn the truth and having their tiny hearts broken. To save me from crying myself to sleep every night and having the same reoccurring nightmare plague my mind: the day I was notified of his passing………

I was at home, having just gotten back from the doctor. I had been feeling very nauseated the past few days and Wes made me promise him that I would go, just to make sure nothing was wrong. And he was right, nothing was wrong… It was right. I had just been confirmed 2 months pregnant with our daughter. We had already been talking about having another child and I knew for a fact that he wanted a girl…..

"I know most guys want sons, but to be honest I've always wanted a little girl. And before you even ask, yes I will spoil her." He told me one night as we sat on the back deck.

"Well, you've never been like most guys." I replied.

"Whatever you say baby, but what do you want?" He said, brushing my hair behind my ear.

"I really don't mind." I stated, curling into his side.

"Sweetheart, please, just tell me what you want?" He asked, gliding his fingers all along my arm and planting tiny kisses along my neck.

"I love our Skylar so much, but I would really love to have a little girl." I sighed. He knew what kissing my neck would do to me.

So, soon as I changed into something a little more comfortable, I decided that I would go get Sky from the babysitter and we would go surprise Wes for lunch. However, I no sooner grabbed my car keys when the phone rang. Thinking 'He must be calling to make sure that I'm okay.' I answered it without checking the caller ID.

"Hey I w…." I stated before being interrupted.

"Jen, its Eric. Look, you need to get down here." he said.

"Ok, is everything ok?" I asked, a small bit of fear and unease filling my body.

"Just hurry." He said before ending the call.

I quickly made my way down to the station and I instantly knew that something horrible had happened. Many of the officers were gearing up to go and each had a fierce look that seemed to be a mix of fierce determination and sadness. I had seen that look so many times before, back when I still worked for Time Force. At least one officer had been either seriously hurt or killed. That's when my brain put all the information together and my heart stopped. No, it couldn't be him. It had to have been one of the others. I made my way up to his dad's office and that is where my worst fear was confirmed.

Eric looked at me and said" Jen, I'm sorry….." before I broke down.

I collapsed right there in the doorway, screaming "no, NO!!!!"

I can't say how I got to the couch but the next thing I know, he's handing me some water.

"Jennifer are you okay?" Mr. Collins asked.

"Where is he?" I croaked out.

"He's downstairs." Eric answered.

"I don't understand. What happened? Why him? He promised me he would always come home!" I said.

"There was a situation at the bank on west 4th street. 2 gunmen with heavy firepower had about 18 people hostage and were threatening to kill everyone inside if we didn't back off. Wes convinced one of the suspects to release one of the hostages, who turned out to be a 7 year old kid. Just as the door opened and the little boy walked out, one of the suspects fired. Wes was able to get the kid back out of the line of fire relatively quickly and joined the rest of us in the firefight. It wasn't until after everything calmed down that he passed out. As it turns out, he'd been hit in the leg and lost a lot of blood. The medics did what they could, but they said that he'd lost too much. He woke up for a few seconds and handed me something to give you. He said "Tell her not to be mad. I tried."." Eric stated before handing me a folded envelope.

"How am I gonna tell Skylar?" I asked the two men "He's not gonna understand."

"He can come stay with me tonight." Mr. Collins stated.

As I lay in bed that night, I decided to read the letter Wes had left for me:

My Beautiful Girl,

I know that I promised you that I would always come home, but if you are reading this then I have broken that promise. I just want you to know that I love you with everything in me. The day you told me that you were here to stay, I felt like the luckiest guy on Earth. It was like all my dreams were coming true. The night I asked you to be my girlfriend, I was overly ecstatic. And the first night I got to fall asleep with you in my arms. That was completely indescribable. And before you even ask, no. The night on the Animarium doesn't count. We were still in, what I refer to as, "Ranger Mode" then. I mean the night when you fell asleep on the couch while we were watching TV. You looked so peaceful that I felt awful having to wake you. After I carried you into the bedroom and got you settled in, I was going to sleep in the other room, but you grabbed my hand and asked me to stay. In the months before I asked you to marry me, I was a nervous wreck. I didn't know what you would say or if you thought we were ready. From all the stories you had told me over the years we had known each other about Calarian tradition and all that stuff, I did know one thing: I would have to ask your father for his permission to marry you. Since I had absolutely no clue how to contact him, I called your brother Matt. He was surprised to hear that I was even asking. Do you know what I told him? I said" Jen always speaks about her family with such high regard and I know that it's killing her not to be able to be back on Calaria, but I know that where you all come from, it's traditional to ask the father for permission and since I can't get ahold of him I want to ask you for your sister's hand.". When you said yes, I couldn't breathe. You looked so beautiful on our wedding day, even more so than normal if that's even possible. I'm fairly sure that I heard someone say "don't forget to breathe". That day is only second in my mind to the day our amazing son was born. I had been on edge all during the pregnancy because I was so scared that something bad would happen. Call it first time parent jitters I guess. I had just gotten back from a meeting when my cell phone went off. It was Izzy calling to tell me that you had gone into labor. I didn't even let her finish the sentence before interrupting and asking if something were wrong with you or the baby. I had to have broken so many traffic laws but I didn't care. I remember the terrified look on your face. You were so brave baby. After he came into the world, you were so tired that you looked like you were about to pass out. After the nurses brought Skylar back in, he didn't even look at me. He wanted his mommy, but when he saw you were asleep, he started crying. I knew once they handed him to me that all my fears about screwing up were unnecessary. I knew I could handle anything with you by my side. Something I never told you is that every morning, before I go to work, I go and have a little talk with Sky. I tell him about how much we love him and how much of a miracle he is. About our time as Rangers and how we could finally tell him everything when he becomes a ranger. Call this idea crazy, but something tells me that any kid who has 2 rangers as parents has a higher chance of becoming a ranger themselves then say a kid who has only 1 ranger as a parent or maybe neither of them are. Sadly, I can't do that now. For whatever reason, I am unable to keep any of the promises that I made. I want you to know that no matter what, I'll always love you. You are the love of my life. My world. Without you, I am nothing. Please forgive me Jen. Know that whenever you get upset or lonely or you just need me, I'll always be right there. I meant what I said earlier: I'll always be by your side. Hopefully, Sky'll be old enough to understand what has happened by the time you have to read this, but in the event that he isn't, I am so sorry. More than you'll ever know. I'll always be watching over you,

Your always loving husband.

I couldn't control myself then. Contrary to popular belief, I'm not the tough girl that I appear to be. I try to be but it's just impossible. From birth, members of the royal Calarian family (the corona gods, their children, and the grand chancellor) are all taught that it is improper for us to show our real emotions. My father always said "Crying is a sign of weakness". Don't get me wrong. My father isn't a cruel man. He's just been irrevocably changed due to the attack for the corona. Wes was the only person outside of my own family that has ever seen me cry. He never judged me. He never said a word. All he would do, as soon as he saw me about to cry or already crying, was open his arms and envelope me in the most loving hug. No matter if I cried for a minute or an hour, he would always just hold me and tell me that it would all be okay. Now, all of a sudden, I'm alone.

Katie, Lucas, and Trip came back to the 21st century the day after they found out about what had happened. They knew how effected by this I was. Wes was my best friend, my lover, my confidant, my husband, my teammate, and the father of my children. I was sitting on the back deck the night that they first came, in the same lounge chair where not a month before had we discussed having another baby. Unconsciously, I rubbed my still flat stomach, when I noticed the sliding door open.

" Sweetie, are you okay." Katie asked, coming to sit in the chair next to me.

"He's gone." I whispered.

She pulled me into a hug and said " I know."

"He promised. He told me not to worry and that he would always make it home." I cried.

"It wasn't his fault." She said.

We sat there for awhile, her just letting me cry myself out, when I suddenly stated " We were talking about having another baby, a little girl.".

"That's great. I've always wanted a niece and Sky would've made an amazing big brother." She said.

"will." I whispered.

"What?" she asked.

"I said will." I choked out, getting emotional saying something so big "I had just gotten home from the doctor when I got the call. I had been feeling sick the past couple of days and Wes made me promise that I would go just to make sure that everything was okay. The doctor told me that I am 2 months pregnant. I was just finishing changing into something more comfortable when I decided that I would go get Sky from the babysitter and we could go surprise Wes for lunch. Just as I grabbed my keys, the phone rang. It was Eric telling me that I needed to get down to the station right away. When I got there, I went to his dad's office and they told me. I haven't told anyone yet except for you and now I don't know what to do. How am I supposed to raise 2 children by myself? How am I supposed to get through this pregnancy and then the delivery when I could barely get through the first one?".

"Don't worry you'll figure something out." She said.

The day of the visitation, I went to the funeral home to make sure everything was right and the director asked me " ma'am, would you like to see your husband?".

I couldn't respond verbally but I did shake my head yes.

He lead me to a private room and what I saw there nearly killed me.

My husband was lying in the casket, in his uniform, looking as though he were sleeping.

" Can I have a moment alone?" I asked.

" Take all the time you need." He stated.

I walked over to where he lay and just broke down.

"Why did this have to happen? Why you?" I cried " Wes don't worry. I don't blame you for not keeping your promise. I blame the bastard who took you from us. Eric told me that they were getting the harshest sentence possible for the guy. I'll be at the trial. Don't worry. Sky's not aware of what's going on just yet, but i'll tell him when he's old enough to understand. Maybe he'll be able to help his little brother or sister understand when they're old enough too.".

That night, it seemed like the whole city had come to pay their respects. Everyone was telling me how sorry they were and how they hoped that the guy who did this was dealt with swiftly. Before I left that night,I pulled wes' morpher from my bag and placed it on his wrist. Many of the people in attendence knew of this part of our history together and just knodded their heads.

( A/N: I am gonna skip the funeral and go right to the part about the victim statement at the trial cause this story is already so sad and I don't wanna write a funeral)

It was finally the day I got to confront the son of a bitch who killed my husband. Not only was he up for murdering a police officer, but also bank robbery, hostage taking and many other charges. As I took my place at the podium, I stared straight at the guy, who looked completely unfazed by what he had done. That made me angry.

"How can you sit there and not be afraid or even minutely remorseful for what you did? Do you even understand the consequences of your actions that day? You killed my best friend, my confidant. You killed my husband. You took away my little boy's father. I was going to surprise him at work that day. To tell him that we were gonna be having another baby. Now I can't do that. I don't get to tell him he's gonna be a father again. To see him rock our newborn baby to sleep. My 3 year old son will never get to come home from school and tell his dad all about his day. You took away a man who means a lot of things to many people and for that, I hope you receive the death penalty.".

In conclusion, the guy did get lethal injection. I ended up delivering a beautiful healthy baby girl named Elizabeth Catherine Collins, the very name Wes always wanted to name his first daughter. Sky understood fairly well when I did tell him and helped me comfort Lizzy when she was told.