"Isn't that right, Sam?"

The words pierced Major Carter's fuzzy, fuzzy brain and finally took hold. "Uh, yeah," she mumbled. She had no idea what Daniel had just said, so she hoped that was the right answer.

The younger man cocked his head at her. "You okay?"

"Mm-hmm," she forced through clenched teeth.

Apparently it was enough, and Daniel continued chattering with the tribesmen at the table. But when her breath hitched, Jack looked over at her, certain that something was wrong. Her pupils were like pin heads, even in the dim light, and she took quick shallow breaths through a jaw locked in place. She sat still as a statue.

"Carter," he murmured, just loud enough for her to hear. "Are you okay?"

Her eyes stared straight ahead, but she let out a sound that might have been a laugh if her throat wasn't so tense. "That's funny, sir," she whispered. "Really."

Jack's eyes narrowed in confusion as he studied her face for signs of whatever had her panties in such an enormous twist. Finding nothing, he scanned lower, half expecting to find a knife in her back or a gushing wound or something equally horrible.

Or… his own hand, a little – no, a lot – higher up her leg than it probably should have been, his middle finger drawing a lazy figure eight on the inside of her thigh. How the hell had that gotten there?

And how long had he been doing it?

Carter squeezed her eyes shut for a second, then abruptly pushed away from the table. "Excuse me," she begged softly and nearly ran from the tent.

"Jack?" Daniel looked at him in concern, though the others had had far too much to drink to notice.

The archaeologist started to get up, but Jack shook his head. "I'm all over it, Daniel."

He found her in an alley less than a block away, her face pressed against the cool stone, hands splayed beside her. "Uh… you good, Carter?"

"Fine, sir." Her voice was tense.

"Then why do you have your face in a wall?"

Frustrated, she spun to face him, eyes closed. "Happy?" she snapped.

"Not really." He crossed the alley, closing the distance between them, and leaned his hands against the wall on either side of her. Her breath sped up again. "You okay?" he asked softly. "I mean, I-"

"It's fine, sir," she choked.

"Then…. What?"

"I have to tell you? Isn't it obvious?"

"I'm pretty dense, Carter."

Her face tightened even further. "I am… painfully close, sir," she choked out.

"Close to what? To-" His eyes widened as he realized what she was talking about. "Oh."

"Yeah," she hissed. "Oh."

He couldn't hold back a chuckle. "Unless I'm mistaken, I only touched your-"

"I know!" she cried in frustration, still not looking at him. "You smug son of a… sir," she corrected.

"Want a little help with the problem, Carter?"

For the first time, she looked him dead in the eye. "Yes. But we both know I can't have it." Her eyes slipped shut again.

He frowned. "Well, I'm glad you remembered that."

"Yes, sir."

"So I guess you'd really like me to just leave you alone?"

"Yes, sir!"

With another self-satisfied chuckle, the colonel pushed himself away and headed back toward the tent. He had just enough time to make the appropriate excuses and calm down Daniel before Sam came back and silently took her seat. The tension was gone, replaced by a pink flush across her cheeks and a slight sheen of sweat on her forehead.

Jack couldn't hold back a smug grin. "Better?"

If it was possible, her cheeks turned even redder. "Better," she confirmed.

Suddenly, he was glad he was sitting down, mostly hidden by the table. He was very glad they were going back to Earth that night, and he wouldn't have to sleep next to Carter in a tent. He wasn't sure he could do it without thoroughly embarrassing himself.

As it was, it was gonna be a long, long night.