I have no excuse for this. Well, okay, maybe I have a little excuse for this.

Boredom.

That is the excuse.

Eagle One

Word Count: 328

Rating: T

"All right," Kaito announced to the gathered group. "From now on, we will have codenames; you will address me as Eagle One!"

"More like Bird Brain One," Hakuba muttered. Hattori held out his fist and the Brit just stared at it, eyebrow raised, until Hattori huffed and put his arm down.

Kaito ignored the peanut gallery. "Akako will be Code Name "Been There, Done That"-"

"Excuse me, I tried to seduce you but you were having none of it," Akako seethed. "How in all the Hells does my "codename" make sense?"

"Tantei-kun is "Currently doing that"," Kaito continued.

"What the hell, I am in the body of a seven year old," Shinichi said flatly. "Furthermore, I am in love with Ran!"

"There's this marvelous thing called bisexuality. Plus, it's currently more like long-suffering pining with little chance of happening. Also you always respond favorably to my flirting. Moving on, Hakuba is "it happened once in a dream"-"

"What the actual fuck Kuroba?" Hakuba blurted.

"It was a really weird dream," the magician defended himself. "Really weird. Plus it was after I accidentally triggered this one smoke trap in the Kaitou Cave, so I'm pretty sure I was tripping on something. Anyways, Aoko is codename "if I had to pick a girl"-" He meeped and had to duck a series of vicious mop thrusts.

"Bakaito!" Aoko roared, coming very close to actually skewering him with her weapon of choice.

"Calm down Nakamori-chan," Akako soothed, laying a hand on her shoulder. "Besides, he's hardly worth it."

Aoko huffed. "You're right, Akako-chan." She allowed herself to be led away by the other girl from where she had trapped Kaito in the uppermost ceiling corner.

"And last but not least," Kaito resumed, all too cheerfully for someone who came this close to getting brutally beaten with a mop. "Tantei-han, your code name is-"

"Must resist urge to break your face," Hattori muttered.

"-Eagle Two," Kaito continued unperturbed.

"Thank everything," the Osakan exclaimed.

It occurred to me after seeing a Percy Jackson one of these that I have never seen a Detective Conan/Magic Kaito version. I may do another version of this, with more recent Detective Conan characters, but don't count on it.