Chapter 15

"Syed, I'll meet you tomorrow where we said but it will have to be a little bit later, say two o clock? I hope you get this message before then. Just text and let me know that you've got it- see you tomorrow."

Amira put away her phone and looked at her father.

"Dad, just let me speak to him first."

"Amira, sometimes men need to talk together. I only want to know what he intends to do by you. Just for once let me be a proper father to you."

"Well don't start getting angry. Hear him out first. I just need to know what is going on and then you can speak to him- give us an hour and if I have not come out to meet you after that you can phone me, okay? Please dad. I do want your help but only if it is necessary"

"Whatever you say Amira. I am here for you."

When Amira rang the Masoods, Zainab answered the phone.

"Amira, don't give up. When you have talked to Syed things might be better."

"Mum, I'm not giving up. I just needed to see my dad."

"Well okay then. But I will look forward to seeing you back here tomorrow. You sleep well."

"And you, bye"

Amira slept badly. She couldn't believe what Lucy had told her and yet it was the one thing that seemed to explain Syed's behaviour. That bastard Christian! All this time he'd pretended to be her friend! What kind of man would behave like that? And Syed. Why had he married her? Was it just to use her as a respectable front while all the time he was doing disgusting things with Christian? The more Amira thought about it the angrier she became.

The next day Qadim drove her to the coffee shop on the corner of Regents Park. Qadim didn't want to leave her but Amira insisted

"One hour dad. You promised. We are married and we need to sort things out. Just call me in an hour. I'm going to be okay I promise. One hour."

Syed was waiting, sitting at an outside table, his shoulders hunched. He looked like he was carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders. When Amira saw him her heart missed a beat. He looked so beautiful and vulnerable. She wanted to be angry with him but she loved him so much!

"Amira"

He stood up, kissed her on the cheek and pulled out a chair for her.

"Would you like coffee?"

"Okay yes thanks."

Both of them were awkward and they both felt the strain of all that was unsaid between them.

"Amira I…I asked you here because there's things I need to tell you. I didn't want to talk with mum and dad breathing down my neck. Amira …"

Amira looked at him, refusing to help him. Syed struggled to find the words. He had to do this on his own. He had lied to her all this time. Just once let him do it right.

"Amira there is something you should know about me, something I should have told you a long time ago. Look …I think you're the most beautiful woman I've ever laid eyes on... I never set out to hurt you; I never wanted that…it's just…"

Syed looked down. He couldn't look at her. She had given her life to him and this was how he repaid her. He had to think about Christian, but at this moment it was hard, he just felt guilt and self loathing for what he had to say , for what he'd done and what he was about to do.

"Syed, Just tell me. I can't bear it any longer, just tell me!"

"I'm…"

Syed looked at her trying to make himself say the words.

Amira couldn't stand it any longer.

"Why are you such a coward? Even now you can't be honest! I know Syed."

"What do you know?"

"Oh please, don't drag this out, just say it Syed or shall I say it for you? You don't love me because you can't love me can you Syed? And we both know why. How could you?

"Amira..."

"Yeah what? What can you say? Sorry? It's empty Syed. I gave myself to you, I trusted you and all the time you've been …"

Amira started to sob

Please Amira,"

"No! I hate you and I hate him! He pretended to be my friend and all the time he just wanted to take my husband. What kind of man is he? He's some kind of freak!"

"Don't call him that…"

"Why not? You're even worse. You disgust me…"

"Amira I …"

"What? What? What can you possibly say that can make things better? You've destroyed me, do you understand? You and Christian."

Qadim sat down in the chair next to Amira facing Syed.

"Syed"

"Mr Shah!"

"Dad, why are you here? I asked you for one hour."

"Amira darling, I want you to take these keys and go and let yourself into the car. It's parked across the road in the bay. I need to talk to Syed myself. Just do as I say. He and I are going to have a chat."

Amira got up.

"I've got nothing more to say to you anyway Syed. I thought I knew you. I don't even know who you are…"

"Amira, I'm sorry."

Amira turned her back and walked to the car.

"So Syed! What to do, what to do uh?"

"Mr Shah. I don't know what to say to you. I do love Amira."

"So you will be staying with her then and working things out until this blows over?"

"I can't do that."

"No you misunderstand me Syed. You will be staying with her and working things out until this blows over."

"No Mr Shah, I can't do that. I can't be with Amira. She and I have tried but it is not working."

"You think that you can make that decision after a few months of marriage? I will not let you do that to my daughter. So, I'm warning you …You'd better find a way to fix this or I swear I will hunt you down. You and anyone you're with and when I find you, you'll wish you'd never been born."

"Are you threatening me?"

"Yes I'm threatening you! You believe me Syed. I'll tell you this. I never liked you from the day I first set eyes on you. I should never have let her marry you. And now you have been carrying on with another woman behind her back. Don't think I don't know! How dare you shame her like this?"

"I have not been seeing another woman. I swear it."

"You listen to me. I'm watching you. Wherever you go I'll be watching you and you'll never be able to relax because every time you look over your shoulder you'll see me and I'll bring you down Syed. That's a promise,