Implied LawxNami, possibly some swearing, Law being Lawish. So... PG. Written for a meme on livejournal.

"We're lost." Dr. Kureha observed.

"Are not." Nami protested.

"Yes we are." The older woman insisted. "This is your fault, girlie. You're the one who's supposed to have that perfect sense of direction."

"Well, I would, but in case you hadn't noticed, the sun's down already, so I can't use that to figure out where north is. And that wouldn't have been a problem if Law hadn't lost my compass!"

Both women turned to glare at Law. He smiled blandly at them and went back to studying poisonous toadstools.

"We're going to have to spend the night out here." Nami moaned. "In the dirt and the pine-sap and the bugs! We should have waited with the car! Someone would have driven by eventually!" Her stomach growled, and she hid her face in her hands in embarrassment. "And now we're going to starve to death."

"I doubt that." said Law. "There's plenty of stuff out here that we can eat. It's far more likely that we'll stumble into the territory of a bear or a wild boar and be mauled to death."

Once again, both women turned to stare at him. Nami let out a strangled little sob. "You're as bad as Robin."

"I''m sure I'm worse." he said flatly.

Kureha laughed and pulled a bottle of brandy out of her coat pocket. "Here, brats." she said. "At least we'll have something to drink now."

Law caught the bottle when Kureha threw it to him and shoved it into his pants-pocket. "You're not supposed to drink when it's cold out because it lowers your core temperature by drawing blood to just below the skin, and allowing it to cool there." he said, frowning at Kureha. "What kind of doctor doesn't know that?"

Kureha bristled. "Listen here you cheeky little brat! I've lived on Drum for a hundred and thirty-nine years, and I have drunk alcohol for a hundred and eighteen of those years, and I'm still alive."

"That's because you're an unnatural old bat. Clearly, your knowledge is extremely antiquated."

Dr. Kureha looked ready to do murder, but Nami ran between them, pushing Law away to prevent a fight. His foot caught in a rabbit-hole and he fell, his ankle twisting painfully.

"Oooh, I'm so sorry." Nami said, kneeling and helping him sit up.

"I would hope so." said Law bitingly. "I think my ankle is broken."

Kureha cackled. "Serves you right for being an arrogant whipper-snapper."

Nami frowned. "Will you get over here? I don't know how to set a bone!"

"You had better sit on him." Kureha advised. "I peg him as being a thrashy squealer."

Nami gave Law a doubtful look, which he returned with a lewd smile designed specifically to make her uncomfortable. Wordlessly, Nami dropped heavily onto his chest, knocking the breath out of him.

"Hold onto his arms." Kureha instructed, grabbing hit foot in one hand and just above his ankle with the other. "One, two-" and she yanked it straight on two.

True to her predictions, Law did let out a little squeal of pain and jerked spasmodically. Nami tried not to laugh at the disgusted look that crossed his face.

"Well now, we won't be going anywhere so I suggest we get comfortable for the night." she raised her eyebrows when both Law and Nami shivered "And you two will have to share body-heat."

"Hear that?" Law said, smirking. "We're going to have to share body-heat."

"Like hell we are." Nami muttered, laying down a few feet away. "Why can't I share with you, Kureha!"

"I'm not planning on sleeping. Somebody has to keep a lookout for bears." she replied, filching her brandy out of Law's pocket.

–

"Oi, I found them!" Luffy called, pointing.

Kureha waved from down the hill as the rest of the search-and-rescue party made their way down.

Nami and Law were curled up next to each other, covered by Kureha's purple jacket.

Sanji bolted towards them, probably intending to kick Law across the clearing, but Robin tripped him with an innocent smile and pulled out the camera she always carried.

This would make a nice one for her photo album.