I Never

Title: I Never

Summary: While hiding out in an abandoned hotel Ellis finds the alcohol stash. So in an attempt to get to know the others better, he challenges them to a little drinking game. Too bad Rochelle and Nick take it a little too far, learning something about themselves afterwards.

Disclaimer: I own nothing, of course.

Pairings: some Rochelle/Ellis

Warnings: Nothing to bad here, some language

Winter-Rae: I totally know this would never happen. But hey, my imagination tends to run wild once in awhile. Besides, interaction between the characters is always fun. Also, this takes place after 'Pay Attention Ellis' but before 'Hard to Move On.' So read on and enjoy!

I Never

"Hey Ro?"

"Yes Ellis?"

The younger mechanic hurried to catch up with her, offering a bright grin when he did. She returned the smile, it was hard not to as Ellis' mood was always infectious.

"What's Cleveland like?"

"Why do you wanna know?"

Ellis shrugged and adjusted the grenade launcher on his shoulder.

"Well, all four of us have been walking around together, saving each other's asses and such, for a while now," he mused, "But in that time we've hardly talked, I don't know hardly nothing about any of ya."

"Maybe because we're not interested in telling you anything," Nick muttered as he brushed past him. Ellis shot him a confused look.

"Why not?" he asked, "We're all friends here...right?"

"Of course," Rochelle said, throwing Nick an annoyed look, "Cleveland is nice, it's got great food and has a lot of history. I like going to the museums every once in awhile. My favourite time of year there is Christmas; the whole city seems to light up."

"Sounds right pretty," Ellis said, "Right Coach?"

"Sure does," the older man agreed.

"How about you Nick?" Ellis asked, "Where are you from?"

"Nowhere."

"Oh come on fancy face," Rochelle said, "Everyone comes from somewhere."

"Yeah, and while you three are jabbering on about shit that doesn't even matter anymore we've got zombies on our asses!" Nick snapped at them, "Zombies that, need I remind you, want to kill, and or eat us. So shut the hell up, pay attention, and keep an eye out for a place where we can spend the night."

The gambler then turned on his heel and stalked off, leaving Coach, Ellis and Rochelle to exchange looks.

"Maybe he's right," Ellis mused, a sadness filling his voice, "Maybe it doesn't matter anymore."

"Of course it matters," Coach said, clapping the younger man on the shoulder, "We have to remember where we came from and what we did before all of this shit started. It's how we keep our humanity, remember that now, both of you, ya got me?"

"Got you Coach," Rochelle said.

"Good, and don't let Nick get to you either, he'll come around."

Ellis and Rochelle nodded, feeing their respect for Coach grow even more. As he started to follow after Nick they fell into stride behind him, keeping a look out like Nick had told them.

It wasn't long after that the group happened upon a closed down hotel. Ellis was probably the most eager to stay here. The possibility of an actual bed, a shower, and maybe some food was sounding really good to him about now.

"I guess we should split up and check it out right?" he asked Nick. The gambler nodded.

"Yeah, you and Rochelle better not get 'distracted' either."

Ellis blushed and rubbed the back of his head sheepishly. Rochelle on the other hand just rolled her eyes at Nick's teasing. Even since he and Coach had walked in on the couple, in the apartment they hid out in a few days ago, he hadn't let them live it down.

"Oh please," she said, "We're not hormonal teenagers."

"No, just hormonal adults, which happen to be just as bad," Coach pointed out as he chuckled at them, "Now behave."

"Scout's honour Coach," Ellis said holding up his right hand.

"And meet back here in five minutes," the older man added when Rochelle and Ellis turned to start checking out of the place, "If you take longer than that I'm coming to get the both of you and I better not need a hose."

"A hose," Rochelle muttered a few minutes later, "What? Does he think we don't know that something big is going on around us? It's not like we jump each other every opportunity we get."

"Don't get mad Ro," Ellis replied, "He probably just wants us to keep our heads in the game is all," then he added in a more playful tone, "And as I remember, you were the one who jumped me, there was none of this 'we' stuff."

Rochelle glared at him and then threw a bottle of pills she had found at him. They hit him in the back of the head and then fell to the floor.

"Hey!" he said, bending down to scoop them up, "We could use these. Waste not; want not, that's what my momma used to always say; especially when she'd have me and Keith over for supper. Man, Keith was a right picky eater; I suppose that makes sense though, considering he choked on nearly everything he ate. Might have been allergies for all I know. Anyway, there was this one time, we were eating smoked ham and a piece of it got lodged in his throat. I swear he turned purple and blue before I finally thumped him on the back hard enough too...Ro?"

He turned around to see that Rochelle was no longer in the room with him. Growing slightly worried he stuck his head out of the door and looked around.

"Rochelle!" he called, he then jumped as something grabbed his sides from behind. He whipped around, ready to fight and was greeted by Rochelle holding her hands up in surrender.

"Quiet down Ellis," she replied, "I didn't go anywhere."

"You scared the piss out of me!" he told her, "Don't do that!"

She chuckled at him. But her laughter died when she saw the annoyed look on his face.

"Okay, jeez, I'm sorry," she said, "I was just playin' with you. Don't get all serious on me now. You're not going to lecture me like Nick did are you? You get to tell your little stories; can't I have a little fun here and there too?"

"Well yeah, just don't scare me like that," he said, sounding like a scolded child, "I don't want nothing to happen to you."

Rochelle was touched. She patted his arm.

"Okay, I'll behave."

"Well, you don't have to behave too much," he said, wriggling his eyebrows at her. Rochelle shook her head and then smacked his arm.

"You're bad;" she told him, "wait till I tell Coach you were trying to seduce me."

"I was not!" he shot back, following her out of the empty room.

"I swear to God I feel like I'm babysitting," Nick ranted to Coach as they cleared out another hotel room. Coach didn't mind Nick's rants all that much, mostly because he could see where his frustrations were coming from. Nick seemed the type to never be around people younger than him, and seemed most comfortable with people his own age or even older.

Rochelle was six years his junior and Ellis, twelve; so he could certainly see how Nick would feel like he was running around with a couple of kids.

"Come on Nick," he said, "Weren't you 23 once?"

"No, I was always a 35 year old trapped in a teen's body," the gambler replied stiffly.

"That there sounds to me like you had it rough for awhile."

Nick said nothing but Coach was more than willing to bet, something Nick would normally do, that he had hit the nail on the head with his guess.

"Think how I feel," he went on, "You all are a bunch of kids to me, you don't see me acting like ya'll are a big nuisance now do you?"

"Yeah well, you're a better man than me Coach," Nick replied, "You got kids I assume then."

"Yep, proud daddy of three," the large man replied, "Two girls and one boy. What about you?"

"None...that I know of anyway."

Coach couldn't help but let out a laugh at that comment, which left Nick to frown. Coach then clapped him on the back.

"Well, looks like this place it all clear, let's go find those two kids."

"Yeah, yeah, lead the way Coach."

"Look here what Rochelle and I found," Ellis said proudly when the four met up in one of the rooms. He set down a box on the dresser while Rochelle set another one on the bed. Coach examined hers; which was filled with some ammunition and a little bit of food while Nick went through Ellis'. The gambler, after seeing the contents of said box, let out a whistle.

"Looks like you're good for something after all Overalls," he said as he tossed a small bottle of liquor to Coach who rolled his eyes.

"Found 'em in the lobby refrigerator," Ellis said, he then plucked one of the other bottles out of the gambler's hand.

"Hey!"

"Hold your horses Nick," the young mechanic said, "I got me an idea, a challenge if ya like."

"And what might that be?" Coach asked, not really liking the tone in Ellis' voice.

"A drinking game," the young mechanic said, "Think of it as a way to get to know each other better."

Nick didn't like this idea at all.

"How about you give me enough of those to knock me out so I can finally sleep for a full night and I won't shoot your foot off," he threatened. Rochelle snickered.

"I'm in," she said, "God knows I need something to take my mind off this shit."

"That a girl!" Ellis said happily.

"What the hell," Coach said with a shrug, "Need something to pass the time."

"Well Nick?" Ellis asked, holding up a few of the little bottles in his hand, "If you wanna drink, you gotta play."

"Fine!" Nick snapped, he'd just about kill for a drink right now anyway.

"Great! The game is I Never," the mechanic explained.

"Never heard of it."

"How could you never hear of I Never?" Coach asked him, "Even I know that one."

"It's easy," Rochelle assured him, "Here."

She handed them each a bottle and sat down next to Ellis on one of the beds in the room. She thought for a moment, tapping the bottle against her lip.

"Okay, got one, I never had a pet dog."

Nick watched as both Ellis and Coach opened up their bottles and took a drink, while Rochelle didn't.

"Basically, you say 'I Never' and then finish the sentence," she said, "If it's something that you did, you drink. If it's something that you never did, you don't drink. Easy right?"

"Sure," he said with a shrug, humouring her.

"You ever have a dog?"

"Yeah."

"Then you would take a drink too."

"So, we can say anything?" Nick asked, smirking as he caught on to the rules of this game.

"Yep," Ellis said, "My turn, I never been married."

Nick and Coach drank from their bottles and then to their surprise Rochelle did as well, only a small sip however.

"It didn't last for very long," she offered with a smile.

"I've never been high," Coach said and then laughed as they each took a drink, "I knew it."

"Only once though," Ellis said quickly.

"It was college," Rochelle said with a shrug. Nick didn't offer an explanation.

"I've never been to Disneyland," the gambler said.

"Oh come on now, that's just sad!" Ellis said when he saw that he was the only one to drink, "None of you ever been there? Well hell, after we get outta this we're just gonna have to fix that."

"You've gone?" Rochelle asked.

"Hells yeah," he said, "Keith, Dave and I all went a few years back, damn it was fun."

"I've never been in jail," Rochelle said. Nick frowned as he was the only one to drink for that one.

"Why am I not surprised," she mused. He glared at her, trying to think of a way to get her back.

"Let's see here," Ellis mused, "I never...had a one night stand!"

Nick groaned in annoyance as he was the only one to drink again.

"Ha! I knew it!" Ellis teased, "Bottoms up Nick."

"I have to drink for each one?"

"No, we'd be here too long," Rochelle said.

"You know, you're not a very nice drunk," Nick told her.

"Sweetie, it takes more than a few shots to get me drunk."

"Take it easy you two," Coach said, "I never been in a strip joint."

"I hate you all," Nick growled, "You're all ganging up on me."

"You're making it too easy," Rochelle said. He glared at her.

"Okay then, I never cheated on a spouse."

To his delight, Rochelle did end up drinking.

"And the mystery to why your short lived marriage ended is revealed," he mused. Rochelle threw her now empty bottle at him, missing him, and grabbed another.

"I never hired a hooker," she said. Nick growled and drank. Ellis and Coach exchanged looks. This game apparently had turned into who could get the most low blows on each other.

"I never had more than three sexual partners."

"You'd have to drink too," she told him in annoyance, "Why bother saying it?"

"Just to find out if you've had more than three," he replied.

"Guys come on," Ellis said, "This was supposed to be fun."

"Oh we're having loads of fun Ellis!" Nick snapped.

"Don't you yell at him," Rochelle warned.

"I'll yell if I feel like it," the gambler replied, "You're the one who started this 'let's show off Nick's dirty laundry' game."

"Look who's talking!"

"Alright!" Coach said, stepping between them throwing an arm out in front of Nick while Ellis grabbed Rochelle's arm, "Enough, both of you. Why you gotta take everything so far and so seriously?"

"Just one more," Nick said, "I never killed a man."

"You're such an asshole," Rochelle hissed, "We've all killed someone and you know it."

"Oh please, those are just zombies, they aren't even people anymore," he said, "If they had any humanity left they wouldn't be coming after us in hordes like they've been doing. The sooner you figure that out, the better we'll all be."

"Oh I've got it totally figured out," she replied, "I know enough to not let them beat your ass don't I?"

"Whatever," Nick muttered, "I've had enough of this, I'm going to bed."

He then left the room and entered the one next to it, slamming the door and bolting it closed. While they knew sleeping alone was a bad idea they decided not to bother him about it. Nick might have been a snorer, and a loud one at that, but he was also a light sleeper. Any noise would alert him in a few seconds.

"I'll take the first watch," Rochelle muttered, "Coach, you get some sleep."

"Thanks little sister, I might do just that."

Rochelle nodded to him and then stalked out of the room. Ellis hurried after her.

"Ro."

"Don't defend him," she said right away, "I don't wanna hear it. Or get into it with you."

"I wasn't gonna," he said softly, "Just wanna make sure you're okay."

"I'm peachy."

Ellis chuckled.

"My momma would always say that when she was pissed off at me over something."

Rochelle sighed.

"I probably shouldn't have went after him like I did," she muttered, "That was stupid."

"Well, you both kinda took it a little too far," he mused, rubbing the back of his head, "I guess I shouldn't have suggested it."

"It's not your fault Ellis," she said, "I was being a bitch and lashing out."

She was annoyed with both herself and with Nick. While she liked the guy well enough, he was both good at killing zombies and saving their asses more than a couple times; he just sometimes rubbed her the wrong way. Of course she wasn't helping the situation any by getting into it with him all the time either.

"Like a damn old married couple," she muttered. Ellis grinned.

"Maybe he likes you."

Rochelle glanced at him in alarm, he held up his hands.

"What?" he asked.

"It's just that...you know that I cheated on my ex now," she said, "Does that make you think badly of me?"

Ellis shrugged.

"I don't know the whole story Ro," he said, "For all I know you coulda been unhappy, or he coulda been a real asshole. We're you guys young when you got together?"

She nodded.

"We dated all through high school and in my second year of college we got married, I was 20," she explained, "We were both unhappy about a year into it. I cheated on him first though."

Ellis nodded.

"Okay, good to know."

"I won't do that to you," she insisted stubbornly, making him grin.

"We all have dirty laundry Rochelle," he said.

"I somehow doubt you do, you're too sweet."

Ellis felt his face heat up at her compliment.

"Well, I'm not gunning for saint hood or nothing like that," he said, "But I've done my share of stupid shit. Never been able to really finish things, like high school for instance, dropped out half way through grade twelve so I could work at the garage."

Rochelle nodded, but said nothing. She didn't think any less of Ellis for that, sometimes that was just the way things went. Still, she did feel guilty for snapping at Nick like she did.

"Shit," she muttered, "Hang on Ellis."

He nodded and watched as she approached Nick's room and knocked on the door.

"Fancy face," she said, "I know you're up."

Nick opened the door and frowned.

"Now what?" he asked, "You want to know more?"

"No, I came to apologize for being a bitch."

Nick arched an eyebrow at her.

"Wow, that's a first," he mused.

"What is?"

"A woman apologizing to me first."

"I popped your cherry then," she said rolling her eyes, "Good for me."

He chuckled.

"Fine, apology accepted, good night."

He then closed the door in her face. Rochelle angrily turned away and stalked back to Ellis.

"I can't stand him!"

Ellis chuckled.

"Oh, he's not all bad Ro."

"Yeah whatever."

The following morning both Rochelle and Nick seemed to have reached a silent agreement not to bring up their argument from the night before. If anything they were being very civil to each other. No doubt they were thinking of both Coach and Ellis as they did this, not wanting to create any tension between the team.

"Rochelle?"

"Yes Nick," she replied. They were gathering up their things to get ready to leave the hotel and move on; she had nearly finished packing up a bag with ammo when he approached her.

"I'm sorry too, okay?" he said.

"Alright, it's fine, let's not do it again how about?"

"Sounds good to me."

Coach and Ellis over heard this apology and just exchanged grins. While Rochelle and Nick might fight once in awhile and acted like they couldn't stand one another, they both knew that deep down they had a lot of respect for each other. Knowing that they had done some stupid stuff in the past only made that respect for each other's humanity stronger.

"If I had to survive a zombie apocalypse with anyone," Ellis mused as they walked, "I'm glad it's with you guys. I'm thinking we can take on pretty much anything."

While Coach expected a smart remark from Nick, the gambler just smirked and snatched Ellis' hat so he could ruffle the mechanic's hair.

"Yeah, I'm starting to like you guys."

"I swear you kids will be the death of me," Coach muttered as he took Ellis' hat from Nick and returned it to Ellis, "Ro, I don't know how you...Ro?"

The three suddenly became aware that Rochelle was no longer with them.

"Not again!" Ellis said, his voice laced with alarm, "Did something grab her?"

"No, we would have heard it," Nick replied, "Rochelle!"

"Ro!" Ellis yelled.

"Where you at girl!" Coach called out.

"Why weren't you watching her Ellis?" Nick demanded of him. Ellis recoiled slightly at the accusation in his tone.

"Don't blame him, all three of us weren't watching, besides, she's a grown woman Nick," Coach pointed out, coming to Ellis' rescue, "She'll do what she wants, when she wants too. All women do."

"Rochelle!" Nick yelled, ignoring him.

"What?" Rochelle said suddenly, emerging from the bushes, "Jeez, why not just announce to the zombies right where we are?"

"Where were you?" Nick demanded, "You could have got pounced, or charged or worse! Use your head will you, you had...Coach and Ellis worried."

Rochelle rolled her eyes and approached them; they all noticed she had dirt on her hands and the knees of her pants as well. She had also found an axe which was now strapped to her back.

"Relax fancy face," she said, "You can't get rid of me that easily."

She then walked along some of the empty cars, looking in the widows, searching for something. When she found what she was looking for, she used the axe to smash it open. They saw her pull out a blanket and then with a grim look of determination she walked back towards the bushes. The three men all exchanged looks and then decided to follow after her.

The bushes seemed to be hiding a small clearing behind them and that was where Rochelle paused. Coach now saw what she had used the axe for. A hole had been dug into the ground and to him; it looked very much like a grave. But for whom was she digging it for? And why? They never took the time to bury any of the zombies they had killed, there just wasn't time to do that, if they stopped they were usually swarmed. So why now, what was different?

Nearby, Coach saw something that made his stomach clench and turn. He grabbed Ellis and Nick's arms and pulled them back.

"What the hell?" Nick said in annoyance.

"What's up Coach?"

"You two go keep an eye out for me will ya?" Coach asked, "Holler if you need us and we'll do the same."

Nick looked like he was about to argue further but thought better of it apparently.

"Let's go Overalls," he muttered. Ellis tossed Coach a look that said 'do I have to go with him?' Coach nodded and motioned his hand for him to follow after the gambler. Ellis heaved a sigh and then hurried to catch up with Nick.

"Hey Nick, I ever tell you..."

Coach didn't hear the rest of Ellis story as he had turned back to assist Rochelle. She was just finishing the grave when he offered her his hand.

"Thanks Coach," she said, "For sending them away."

Coach nodded.

"Ellis doesn't need to see stuff like that," he mused, "And Nick might think he's tough but even that would be too much for him I think."

She spread out the blanket she had taken and then lifted a small form onto it.

That form was a child. A little girl, no older than six, Coach would have guessed.

"Ro...did you..."

Rochelle shook her head quickly.

"I could never do that," she said sadly, "I saw her like this while we were walking and I couldn't just leave her."

While she wrapped the little girl in the blanket Coach couldn't help but wonder why they hadn't seen any infected children. All of the infected people they had seen had to have been in their teens and even older. But never were there any children. He had to admit, for that he was thankful. He didn't think he could bring himself to shoot a child, infected or not. Being a father had given him a huge soft spot for kids. Absentmindedly he reached into his back pocket and brushed his fingers across his wallet.

Maybe the infection didn't take children? Now that was just wishful thinking on his part. Or maybe it only took healthy, older individuals. Well that didn't make much sense either. How did you account for Infected like Boomers and Smokers? Maybe it was just a chaotic disease, no figuring it out no matter how hard one might try.

"Coach," Rochelle said quietly, pulling him from his thoughts of home, "Can you help me please?"

He nodded.

"Of course."

Together, they took one end of the wrapped bundle and placed her in the grave. Then, together, they pushed the dirt over her and once they had finished Rochelle was suddenly aware that she was crying. Tears streamed down her face and dripped down onto the dirt. She quickly straightened up and turned away, not wanting Coach to see.

"Rochelle," he said softly, "It's okay to cry for the children."

"It's just not right," she sobbed, "She was just little."

Coach pulled her into a hug and glanced at the grave. He then started to say a prayer for the little girl while Rochelle sobbed.

"Lord," he started, "Let her walk with you, although her steps might be small. Stay beside her and hold her hand so that she may never fall. Amen."

"We have to keep our humanity right Coach?" Rochelle asked him.

"That's right Ro, and by doing this I think you just assured that you'll keep yours."

"I hope so Coach, I really do."

"Coach! Ro!" Nick suddenly yelled, "A little help here!"

The two ended their comforting embrace and Rochelle wiped her eyes.

"Really to do this Ro?" Coach asked as she handed him the axe and then picked up a tossed away cricket bat.

"I am."

Winter-Rae: Honestly, this serious stuff is kinda hard for me to write. I'm mostly a romance/humour writer; two topics that really don't work in huge amounts in Left 4 Dead. I guess I have to become more in touch with my inner angst to pull these off, haha. Anyway, thanks for reading everyone, hope you enjoyed that. I have to say, I really enjoyed writing Coach in this one, I must write about him more sometime. Cheers!