Note: This was a kind of "out of nowhere" fic that was buzzing around in my mind when I started re-watching this and I also typed this up late at night so yeah... I hope it's enjoyable and readable.

I'm not exactly sure what I should rate this story so if someone could tell me what I should, I'd really appreciate it~!

DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN HELLSING IN ANY WAY!!

"And why do you stay here?"

"Because I love him…"

Can you really love such a creature? Or better yet, can a human love such a creature? She felt she could and in fact did. Though, for a human to love a being such as him, how much love would be required? There was no way one like he would have any romantic feelings for a human, much less a human like herself. Yet she did whole heartedly and wouldn't leave the organization no matter what happened to her until her feelings were known.

A stupid decision on her part, yes, but she wanted what she wanted and what she wanted was him.

What makes one want what they want? Why would she want something like him? She might have called it love, but was it really? It felt like it except she was sure that when something else that was just as enchanting as him came around her want would transfer to that, whatever it may be.

Ah, but alas, all that mattered to her right now was she yearned for that so called untouchable creature. Surely, even he had lustful desires that he wanted and possibly needed to have fulfilled. And if that be true, she desperately craved to be the one to assist him in any way possible.

"You are aware that there is a high possibility that he does not feel the same in any way."

"I am aware, sir, yet that doesn't seem to bother me in the least… I do not care if he feels the same…"

It was true. She didn't at all. However he felt was actually irrelevant to her. Just a small expression of affection from him would be enough even if it wasn't completely true. One night of some kind of romanticism with him would satisfy her beyond her wildest dreams.

A selfish desire it was, but every girl gets that way at some point with something.

That point where nothing other than what you want and how you feel really matters. That point where she was exactly and that was all that mattered.

"And you… crave him enough to convey to him your feelings then?"

"Of course, sir. And I will when the right way to shows itself…"

She wanted him incredibly, but how would she go about confronting him? She couldn't just waltz right up to him and say what she had been dying to tell. Well… She could, but there was absolutely no tact in that approach. Not to mention, she didn't want to give the impression that she was just there for the purpose of getting what she wanted, though it would be a major factor.

"You do know that if you go through with this and are successful in your attempts, you will have to leave?"

"Yes. I know and I am very willing to accept that fate…"

Leaving this place would be very hard for her. It had been her home for a while now, but she would accept the consequences for achieving the thing she wanted most as of now and there is always a price to pay.

The conversation that had happened a few days before still kept going on in her mind as she walked slowly down the corridors of the large mansion taking in every little detail there was. This would, in fact, be her last night there.

She had decided that it was time and she was going to make sure that everything went smoothly.

The sound of her thin boots tapping lightly on the carpet on the floor while she headed towards his domain was the only noise there. Her clothes, which normally felt loose on her frame, seemed to constrict and squeeze her body. Nerves. It must be just nerves. Walking into this situation with no small amount of light to predict how he would react caused her systems to quiver and shake in some fear, but she had set her mind to this and she would do it!

"There's no turning back…" she mumbled to herself as she trotted silently down a flight of stairs leading to the lower levels.

Only a few small gas lamps lit this stairwell and it caused quite an eerie feeling, making the shadows seem to come alive. And for all she knew, they could very well have been, yet the sense of eeriness wasn't all for naught. She was indeed being watched. That cliché feeling flooded the atmosphere surrounding her, tipping her off that someone was curious as to her intentions of being down there.

Ha! That thought made her giggle when she imagined him not already being aware of the reason for her coming down. He always had some inkling of what was going on and if he didn't know anything about her little visit then she would be very disappointed.

She hoped that he knew about her feelings for him. She planned everything around him knowing and if he didn't, all was ruined. Explaining to him the complicated, yet somehow very simple and straight forward, feelings she had for him would make the effect of it all decrease an unimaginable amount.

And after walking down the stone brick hall a ways, the door leading to the destined room came up to her.

She froze though, suddenly second guessing her choice of coming to see him. What if she was rejected? There was a large fear of rejection in her now along with a fear of the embarrassment that would follow said rejection. She couldn't blame herself for being afraid of that, but again she told herself that she couldn't stop now.

So kept on she did, and began reaching for the handle not wanting to take the whole process too fast. Or more like her mind didn't. The heart and the brain never seem to want to work together on things like this… Her mind was still thinking this choice over. Was it really smart to disturb him for this? And even if it was, would it be rude to do so anyways? And as her thoughts raced, something was urging her to shut them out and just open the door.

Simply open the door and come down… it invited. It was a light invitation in the back of her consciousness. She probably wouldn't have noticed it if there had been more going on around her. A woman's naturally multitasking mind is a marvel. And again, as her hand wrapped around the handle the invite echoed, telling her to come.

And she took that invitation.

Pulling open the door, yet another staircase descended in front of her, but there was barely any light this time. Beyond the first two steps, they were engulfed by a creeping darkness.

Of course his home would be like this. Dark. Creepy. Eerie. And all around discomforting to a very large point, but she was being invited in; to walk down the eaten-away-by-shadows stairs. Along with the pushing of the unknown inviter her intentions encouraged her to keep going as well. She wanted to go whether she was invited or not, but it did help in making her feel better about doing this.

"Is this something that you really want?"

"As of right now, yes… More than anything else…"

That's right. More than anything else. This is what she wanted.

The air around her became cold, stale, and heavy. The atmosphere seemed to reek of death. It chilled her bones, caused her skin to crawl and get goose bumps, made the hair on the back of her neck stand on end, and froze the blood flowing through her veins. She was becoming terribly cold all of a sudden.

There shouldn't be much further to go...

Once she was just a few steps away from the floor her eyes wandered around the dimly lit room. A small table with a wine glass half filled with something sitting on it. A large black coffin over in the far right corner. And a chair situated in the middle of the room with a book lying open half way through on the thin cushion. The chair, much to her dismay, was empty.

Her heart sank in her chest as she stopped on the second to last step. He wasn't there… But she was for sure that he would have been from all she had observed and there was not a mission scheduled for this night. She had made sure of that.

This couldn't be! This just couldn't be!

Anger welled up inside her. Not exactly justified anger, but anger just the same. Clenching her teeth together, she did what she could to contain herself. What was she supposed to do now? She had packed all of her things up, making them ready for her whenever she departed from this place. So what in the world would she do now?!

"I might as well leave…" she mumbled to herself.

She started to turn and head back up to the door, but just as she set the sole of her boot on the stair, she froze when the feeling of his presence weighed down on her.

"And why would you do that when you've come so far and I've just returned?"

She stopped as she stared at him. A small smirk spread his lips apart, showing a few of his sharpened teeth. Her jaw hung open some, not exactly sure what to do next. The plan she had made didn't have a plan B for any of the other scenarios that could have come up. Like this one.

"Well?" he pressed while he took a step forward down the stairs, "Why would you?"

All that was able to come out of her mouth was a thin stream of air. She was out of words and close to out of breath. Her lungs expanded more and more in an attempt to get more oxygen, but they just couldn't seem to get enough. The nerves that had built up on the way there fluttered throughout her body making her muscles shake in tension.

"Are you not going to answer me?" No answer. Just a blank stare. "Alright…" He stepped out of the way some, pulling the entrance to his home open more and he motioned the rectangular opening to her. "If you have no business to conduct with me, I would like you to leave. I do not get too many nights to be by my–"

"No!" she yelped leaning on the balls of her feet some.

"Ah, she speaks."

"I… I have a purpose… An-And I didn't want to leave..." The voice she portrayed was unlike the usual. It was timid. Nervous. Eager for whatever was going to happen to happen. "My… My reason… I-I-I came down here because I…"

Again, a smirk spread across his features. He moved back toward the middle of the step he was on pushing the door along with him a bit.

"I'm quite aware of your reason." There was a glint in his red eyes that made her stop everything as he spoke. "And I am more than happy to grant you what you wish, but let me ask…" His gaze locked completely with hers. Even if she had wanted to look away, he wouldn't have allowed it. "Are you completely sure that you will not have any regrets?"

She nodded. It was a miracle that she didn't fully tune out after he said he would be willing to give her what she yearned for.

He looked to the hallway, let his eyes roll a bit from side to side, making sure that all was quiet and then turned back to the awaiting mortal.

"Prepare yourself then."

Silently, the door shut as the two of them moved further into the darkness of his chamber…