~CONAN-RELLA~

Once upon a time there was a smart, but very poor orphan who lived with his evil stepmother and stepbrothers.

His name was Conan-rella.

Conan-rella's real name was Shinichi, but one day he ran into some trouble. He was knocked out and drugged, but the drug that was supposed to kill him shrank him instead. From then on, he was basically forced to disappear from society as the person he once was.

In order to keep the evil people who'd shrunk him from returning to finish the job, he changed his name to Conan-rella: Conan for his favorite author's name and rella because it sounded funny.

His evil stepmother, Haibara Ai, and his ever-so-evil stepbrothers, Gin and Vodka, were so ashamed of the name and his shrunken state that they kept him locked in the house and occupied him with slave work.

Well, that didn't really worry them. Haibara had only taken Conan-rella in for the money in the first place.

Conan didn't mind that much either- once he was done with his chores, he could read all the Sherlock Holmes he wanted! Besides, it was safer for him this way.

The only thing Shinichi really missed was seeing Princess Ran on her regular trips to the marketplace.

Princess Ran was a beautiful, raven-haired girl who lit up any situation. While she could be a bit bubble-headed at times, she had a good heart and a beautiful smile.

Conan loved her.

Unfortunately, there was the tiny little detail that Conan was now, physically at least, an eight-year-old. Any romantic relationship would be illegal.

And Shinichi didn't DO illegal. He WAS a detective wanna-be after all.

Anyway.

One day a letter arrived in the mail.

After arguing over who would have to drag themselves off the couch in front of the TV, Vodka (being the dimmest of the four--These arguments were usually mental challenges) trudged mournfully to the mail slot and retrieved the three notes there.

Conan was the only one who didn't look up. Instead he continued staring blankly at the television and popping his bubblegum. Barely anyone knew about him, so he never got mail. Or, at least, he should have never gotten mail.

"One for me," Vodka was murmuring, flipping through the expensive-looking envelopes. "One for Gin… aaaaand…. One for Conan-rella…"

All motion froze. Even Conan-rella's bubble stopped mid-pop.

Finally, Haibara decided that she wanted to swallow her mouthful of Diet Cherry Coke and activity resumed.

Vodka ripped the envelope open and read, "The royal palace-"

Conan-rella was immediately reminded of Princess Ran. "The Royals know who I am?" he asked. A pillow and an empty can of Diet Cherry Coke were tossed in his general direction as an indication to be quiet. Conan-rella dodged the pillow, but wasn't so lucky with the can.

"The royal palace is delighted to inform us that there will be a costume party in two days' time for all eligible bachelors… to see who will marry the young Princess Ran!"

Conan-rella accidentally swallowed his gum, but he hardly noticed.

Unfortunately, Haibara DID notice, and this earned him a whack on the head and an exaggerated explanation of where gum is SUPPOSED to go.

None of his relatives seemed too enthusiastic about the ball. Haibara had inherited enough money to keep her occupied until her great-grandchildren died, and she wasn't particularly into the whole let's-suck-up-to-people-for-money idea… but only after she was done with the method herself.

Conan-rella cleared his throat oh-so-discreetly, glancing at his stepmother.

"No," said Haibara.

"Why not?" Conan-rella whined.

"Because you're not an eligible bachelor. The letter was meant for Shinichi. And, as Shinichi is long gone, neither of you will be going."

Shinichi didn't like it when Haibara referred to him as two different people. It got confusing after a while. He frowned. Tragically, in his vertically challenged position, it came out as more of a pout, making Gin and Haibara smirk as if this proved her point.

"Nevertheless, if only two guests come from an address to which three invitations were delivered, the Royals may get suspicious and your child abuse will become known," Conan argued, gesturing to the second invitation in Gin's hand.

Haibara had already gone back to her television show about Albert Einstein. She grunted indistinguishably.

"…Does… that mean…. okay?" Conan-rella ventured timidly.

Haibara shrugged in response to her sons' raised eyebrows. "Why not? It's not like he'll get anywhere in that body. But there's just one thing that needs to be cleared up…"

Conan-rella suddenly felt a chill.

"What do I get out of it?" the evil stepmother inquired, in a tone that would've been sweet had she not been smiling the same way she had when she told him that signing his money over to her would be beneficial for both of them.

Conan-rella sweat-dropped. "Eh…"

"I know!" she said as if she'd just invented the antidote for him that she was insisting she was working on.

Right.

"If you can solve the forty-nine fabled 'impossible cases' from Tokyo, you can come."

Vodka's jaw dropped. Gin actually looked surprised. Haibara grinned innocently.

The evil stepmother and stepbrothers earned extra pocket money by "solving cases".

They would go to a crime scene, tell Conan-rella everything over the phone, and he would tell them the solution to the mystery (Or they would email the answer if the police were somehow unavailable).

He usually had nothing better to do, so he went along with it. In fact, he hadn't even known that they'd gotten money for his efforts until a while before.

It was almost a given that the detective who solved even one of these fabled unsolved cases would be paid handsomely by the Royals.

But they weren't called impossible for nothing.

Conan-rella leveled his options. True, it would be a long shot to solve forty-nine difficult cases in two days, but he didn't really have anything to lose if he didn't complete them.

Only the chance to meet Princess Ran personally that is.

"Alright," said Shinichi finally, matching Haibara's steady gaze easily. "But if I solve all forty-nine cases, you have to come up with some sort of temporary antidote for me. Deal?"

The two evil stepbrothers were watching the conversation with great interest. Haibara looked at Conan-rella for a minute before a mischievous grin crept its way across her face.

"Deal," she said.

For the next two days, Conan-rella locked himself in his room with a giant stack of books, a fast Internet access, and a telephone book full of connections- important, informed people he could call in for favors.

Of course, as the ball grew nearer, he was needed more often. Haibara 'gently persuaded' (aka, forced) the evil stepbrothers to go to the party, if for nothing more than to develop some social skills and let her not have to make dinner.

So Shinichi was constantly bustling around, his arms full of cloth and thread and his mouth filled with pins that he had nowhere else to put, measuring and cutting and sewing his stepbrothers' costumes.

Technically, Haibara could've bought them all a wardrobe of tuxedos and not make even much of a dent in the inheritance money, but again, she didn't want to spend it on other people.

It seemed to Conan like she was saving it for something. What exactly that 'something' could be was anyone's guess.

Haibara was locked in her lab almost all day. Every once in a while, there would be a large explosion and Conan-rella would sigh and trudge downstairs to put a new door on the hinges for the eleventh time. Nevertheless, by the day of the ball he had solved thirty of the fabled impossible cases.

The entire city was chaotic that morning when Conan-rella woke up and reached blindly for his books on the murder in Beika museum in 1994. Bakers were yelling, chickens were squawking, and wives were fighting their way through the crowd with baskets of bread and fruit.

Sometimes Conan-rella pretended that he was down there with them, in his old body.

But every time he caught himself straying to the past days, he quickly jerked himself out of those foolish dreams. After all, hoping something would come true does not make it come true. Dreams were only dreams; the only really effective tool is logic.

That day in the Ai household, chores were set about to as per usual, except everything was a hundred times more hectic.

Doors exploded even more frequently, Gin and Vodka declared that they would just DIE if they didn't get some purified wheatgrass juice, and Shinichi was about ready to rip his carefully selected books into carefully selected shreds.

Finally, the time came to go to the ball.

Haibara looked like an actual girl in a dress and jewelry with a sparkly eye-mask. Gin was very handsome in his white half-mask despite his abnormally long hair for one of the male species. Vodka looked… well… like Vodka in a turtle suit.

Haibara glanced at her watch. Then she turned to her sons. "He hasn't been able to meet the deadline. Let's go."

Just as they were about to close the door behind them, a young voice cried, "Wait!"

Conan-rella ran to the entrance room, his small, eight-year-old form dressed in a black knight's armor and visor. His small red trainers poked out from under his black pants and a stray fold of cape. He smacked a pile of books, files, and loose papers that was almost as tall as he was onto the floor.

"I did it," he panted triumphantly. "I solved them all. Now, where's that antidote?"

Haibara turned to face him. Her brown eyes held something Shinichi had never seen there before. Apology, defeat…. And pity…?

"I've tried, Conan-rella. I really did. But…. There is no antidote."

Conan-rella's heart skipped a beat and his hands went clammy. "No, wait…. There… there HAS to be a cure! I've worked so hard to go to this ball… to get my old body back, even for a little while. I can't go to the palace looking like a child! You can't…. be serious…!"

"I am serious," Haibara stated, turning back to the outside. "It would take something like magic to turn you back from this state…. I'm sorry," she added softly, and then the door was slammed in his face.

Conan-rella stared numbly at the closed door for a minute before sinking into a cushy armchair and resting his head in his hands. This wasn't just a missed chance; this was the end of his former life. Shinichi was gone forever… And now Conan-rella's pathetic excuse for an existence was all he had left.

Hanging around the house doing chores, solving cases every once in a while…

Conan-rella could've gone to the ball as he was. But that would mean lying to Princess Ran about who he was in order to keep those smugglers who'd shrunk him from catching on.

He realized that going to a party in his old body would be dangerous, bordering on suicidal, but he didn't care anymore. For once in his life, he disregarded logic.

For once in his life, Shinichi let his mind wander into what could have been.

If only he hadn't been so reckless... If only he hadn't followed those gun smugglers and let himself get knocked out. If only he had introduced himself to Princess Ran before his world collapsed…

Maybe he could've solved a very dangerous case for her and stolen her heart. She might have been so impressed with his bravery that she could've even invited him to the palace!

If only…

"Earth to tantei-kun, Earth to tantei-kun. Do you copy?" a voice said teasingly.

Conan-rella jumped. Almost no one in the village knew he existed, and nobody but NOBODY knew about his detective skills.

Conan looked up into effervescent purple eyes and a huge Cheshire-cat-like grin. The grin grew as Conan-rella took in the rest of the stranger's appearance, his eyes widening at quite a remarkable rate.

The man was dressed in a pristine white suit and a matching top hat. The area over his eyes was shadowed just enough so that the monocle covering his right eye stuck out conspicuously, similar to the rest of his overly flamboyant outfit. But the part that surprised Shinichi most was the large black wings that sprouted out of the man's back. One white-gloved hand gracefully twirled a thin, glittering stick.

"It's not a stick, tantei-kun. It's a wand," the stranger said, carelessly tossing it into the air and catching it between two fingers. "My favorite wand, actually."

I've gone mad, Shinichi thought bemusedly.

"No you haven't," the man replied with a merry laugh. "Well, maybe you have. After all, with all those murder cases you've been working on lately it was bound to happen sooner or later."

"Go away," Conan-rella muttered, going back to his sulking. "I'm not in the mood for delusions."

The intruder chuckled, vanishing the wand with a wave of his hand. "But am I delusion tantei-kun?" he asked, kneeling so he was eye-to-eye with the not-child. "I could be a hallucination, or an illusion. Or I could be…" A rose materialized in his hand with a poof of sparks and pink smoke. "…An apparition."

The delusion's eyes seemed to be playfully commanding him to take the rose, and Conan-rella was too stunned to disobey. As soon as he touched the stem however, he pulled his hand away as if it had been burned. The rose felt real. The whole thing was far too real for his logical mindset.

"Who are you?" Conan demanded, ignoring the stray rose petal that wilted and fluttered to the floor as he drew away from the stranger.

The guest frowned at the petal and then turned back to the boy. "Hm… and here I was under the impression that you were intelligent." He ruffled his wing-feathers proudly. "I'm your fairy god-cousin, of course."

"Fairy… god-cousin…?"

"Yep," he said, bouncing onto the nearby couch. "I'm a magical being who's been with you ever since you started having lots of trouble, just waiting for you to summon me."

"Uh-huh," said Conan-rella.

"You see, you never believed in magic or the… uh… illogical. But, you see, I AM magic. So once you let yourself imagine, I was able to come help you out."

"Uh-huh," said Conan-rella.

"And trust me, you need a good helping out," he went on, looking Shinichi up and down.

"Uh-huh," said Conan-rella.

After a pause, Kaito (alias fairy god-cousin and Kaitou Kid) sighed. "You don't believe I really exist."

"Nope," said Conan-rella.

"Well… I do exist."

"No, you don't."

"Yes. I do."

"No, you don't."

"Yes, I do."

"No, you don't!"

"Yes I do!"

"No you don't!"

"Oh, shut up tantei-kun."

"You shut up!"

"What?? You shut up!"

"YOU shut up!"

"YOU shut up!"

"YOU SHUT UP!"

"YOU SHUT UP!"

"YOU SHUT UP!"

"YOU SHUT UP!"

Conan-rella rubbed the bridge of his nose and sighed deeply. "Okay… look. You," he said, indicating Kaito. "Come from my… eh… Imagination, right?"

"Right," said the fairy god-cousin, breathing heavily from the shouting.

"Meaning, you are a creation… or rather… a figment of my imagination, correct?"

"Rig- no, wait!"

"So, by definition, you don't exist," Shinichi finished, crossing his small arms over his chest.

The two boys glared at each other until finally, the seemingly elder one said, "Fine. But at least humor me until I'm done or the magic won't work."

"…Uh-huh," Conan-rella muttered, leaning back into the chair and summarily not doing a very convincing job of it.

The magical god-cousin looked at him and glared at the child's tenacity. Conan suddenly realized that this guy was always smiling; even when he glared, he smiled. Made him wonder what kind of a messed up imagination he had, really…

"Look. You really have to believe me a little while. Or at least not NOT believe me, okay?" the Kaitou said with a glare-grin.

"I. Don't. Believe. In. Magic," the detective replied firmly.

Kaito smiled again, but this time it was a little bit sad. "You know, that's a terrible way to live, tantei-kun."

Conan-rella's expression went from annoyance to slight bewilderment to surprise at the sudden change in demeanor.

"Ah ha!" the fairy god-cousin cried, snapping right back into his ever-present impish grin. "Your main emotions are confusion and alarm now, not cynicism! I can work with that!"

And before Conan-rella could even open his mouth to say "huh?" Kaito waved his wand dramatically and said, "Bippity boppity boo!"

It was as if he had activated a pile of fireworks. Sparks popped and fizzled before his eyes, and his sight became distorted through blurry swirls of pink smoke. A blissful rush of heat over came his small body. The logical objections that were usually at the tip of his tongue were dismissed immediately, melting at first contact with the overwhelming warmth. It was so warm… so warm…

Shinichi opened his eyes as the heat faded, looking down at his body. He would've fallen over in shock had he not been sitting down.

"Wha… What…?" Conan-rella stammered, turning his hands over and checking the size of his body again and again.

It was normal-sized. HE was normal sized. Normal-sized for his ACTUAL AGE.

But it wasn't logical. There was no pain, no injection or pill... even if there was, Haibara had said there WAS no cure, and she was almost always right about those kinds of things. In fact, even his clothes and custom-made sneakers expanded to fit his new form. It made no SENSE.

"Oh, my," Kid commented thoughtfully. "You ARE quite the handsome devil, aren't you?" Conan-rella was too busy gawking at his new body to come up with some sort of retort, so Kaito added with a huge smile and a fluid ringmaster-like wave, "But wait! There's more!"

With another casual flick of his wand, a pair of thick-rimmed glasses with a plastic gag nose appeared on the detective's face. Kaitou grinned. "To keep those bad guys away."

"No, thank you," said Conan dryly, snatching the joke glasses off.

The fairy god-cousin shrugged smugly and then cheerfully grabbed Shinichi's wrist and dragged him out the door into the front lawn.

"What are we doing out here?" Conan-rella asked, jerking his arm away from Kaito's grip.

The winged teenager looked at the other over his shoulder. "Well, you need a way to get to the palace, don't you?"

"I have a skateboard."

"Hm. So I see."

"...I don't like that look on your face at all."

"Hey! So you ARE smart after all!" the Kaitou laughed, waving his wand toward the small board propped up against the garden fence. "Bippity boppity boo!"

A column of bright light exploded around the skateboard, lifting it into the air as it grew and morphed into…

"A motorcycle?" Conan asked, his brain subconsciously banishing all attempts at logic by now. "It's nice, but I wouldn't know how to ride it."

Kaito blinked. "Uh… oh. Well… you can't go on a skateboard, either way. That's just too un-suave."

"I still don't know how to ride a motorcycle though," Conan rolled his eyes.

"So we'll get you an escort, my dear delicate princess."

"Just because I can't ride a motorcycle doesn't mean I'm a delicate princess," Conan-rella deadpanned.

"You've got the name for it," Kid muttered under his breath. "Bippity boppity boo!"

"Why do you say that anyway?" Shinichi asked the magical being. "You created my glasses without it."

Kaito reddened as he kept his eyes glued on the object he was funneling his magic into at that moment. "I, uh, it's a habit I picked up from my teacher," he admitted.

Meanwhile, the neighbor's dog was transforming into a tall, dark-skinned teenager in sweats and a Tokyo Spirits baseball hat.

Kaitou Kid grinned. Conan-rella stared. The dog turned human waved and said hello.

"My name is Heiji," it said in a gruff… well… dog-like voice. "I can take you to the palace on that motorcycle, if you wish."

Conan-rella's mind was completely blank. Another first.

"Well, don't just stand there gaping like a f- f- fi-" Suddenly, a strange, almost fearful expression crossed the god-cousin's face, and it was a while before he could get his act together. "-Fi…ngernail!" he improvised desperately.

Conan raised his eyebrows.

"It's a common phrase in the magical realm," Kaitou explained in a nervous sort of stage whisper. "Anyway. No more dillies or dallies, you've got a ball to get to!"

Conan-rella and Heiji had finally positioned themselves correctly on the motorcycle and were about to drive away when the fairy god-cousin said, "Oh! I almost forgot. At the stroke of midnight, the spells will be broken. You only have three hours in this body. Use them well."

Conan nodded grimly.

Kaito regarded the boy who could've been his twin speculatively. Then he tugged the corners of his mouth up in a way that it looked like Shinichi was growling. "And remember to smile!" the fairy cheered, releasing the detective. "After all, you need all the help you can get in capturing the princess's heart."

Before Conan could blush or deny it, the bike started up with a roar.

As they sped away, Conan-rella yelled over his shoulder, "Thank you! Thank you so much!"

Kaito blew him a cheeky kiss in response.

(End of Act One)