Hey everyone this is a Gokudera Tsuna (5927) story. I hope you like it. This is the very first song fic I have ever done so please dont judge me if it doesnt make any sense. well I hope you like it.
Under line - Song
Italics - Flash back
Normal - present time
Disclaimer:- I dont own This song (Because of you by Kelly Clarkson) or these characters.
Gokudera stood there up on stage in front of the whole mafia, microphone in hand, "This song is dedicated to a person very close to my heart who had passed away recently"
Gokudera eyes were closed and he was humming to the song that was just about to begin, his hips were swaying softly to the slow music. When he was about to start singing he brought the microphone to his mouth and started to sing.
I will not make the same mistakes that you did
I will not let myself cause my heart so much misery
I will not break the way you did
You fell so hard
I've learned the hard way, to never let it get that far
Tsuna stood there, in front of the guardians, his closest friends waiting patiently for everyone to quieten down so he could give his command. It didn't take long because Gokudera started to yell at everyone.
"Oi! Everyone shut your trap the Juudaime is trying to tell us something!"
"Ne, Gokudera-kun, calm down its okay." Tsuna said calming the angry storm guardian instantly.
"I have decided to have the Vongola rings destroyed-" Tsuna started only to be cut off by a few people.
"What.. WHY?!"
"B-but Juudaime"
"Dame-Tsuna"
Tsuna waited patiently for everyone to settle down before he continued talking.
The rings were soon destroyed not long after Tsuna said they would be so. And he soon realised that this wasn't the smartest thing he could of done.
The Millefiore soon attacked, people falling left, right and centre. Tsuna stood there a false smile on his face trying to calm his subordinates down, but Gokudera could tell, he could see that Tsuna was falling into the depths of despair, and fast.
Gokudera's voice echoed through out the whole room, all the Guardians who were sitting at the bar drinking away their sorrows of their beloved Tenths death, turned to face the man who was singing with all his worth.
Because of you
I will never stray too far from the sidewalk
Gokudera had fallen in love with his Juudaime long ago, pledging his allegiance towards the man. Trusting him with his every being.
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side
So I don't get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust
Not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid
Tears started to leak out of Gokudera eyes as he sung, eyes still clamped tightly shut. His hand that was holding the microphone started to shake. His other hand was clenched shut against his chest, his heart beating erratically.
I lose my way
And it's not too long before you point it out
I cannot cry
Because I know that's weakness in your eyes
Gokudera soon started to watch the man he loved so much bring himself to the brink of insanity because of all this guilt. Gokudera couldn't handle it and took things into his own hands.
Walking up to Tsuna one day and put his hands on each cheek, tilting his head up so he could look into Tsuna's beautiful eyes, they glistened with unshed tears, it made his heart break seeing the man he loved so dearly torn into pieces.
"It'll be ok Juudaime, you'll think of something. You always do." Gokudera lent down and place a small kiss on Tsuna's innocent lips. Smiling, trying to reassure him that everything was going to be alright. It felt fake, it was fake but he couldn't do anything about that.
I'm forced to fake, a smile, a laugh
Every day of my life
My heart can't possibly break
When it wasn't even whole to start with
Gokudera opened his eyes and saw every pair of eyes in the room on him, as if begging him to continue, to help the drown out their sorrow. He felt hot tears swell up again and began to leak over. His singing however stayed perfect.
He came here on this very day, only a week after Tsuna's death with a goal, and here he was fulfilling it. Trying to get rid of these feelings for the man he loved dearly.
Because of you
I will never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side
So I don't get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust
Not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid
Gokudera stood up on the stage claiming it as his own even if it was for only a couple of minutes and sung his heart out, will thinking to himself.
'How could you do this to me? I loved you, I'd do anything for you. I trusted you and only you with my life, how can you rip away that trust by doing this to me. To everyone in the Mafia. They all loved you Tsuna.' thought the distraught man.
The guardians by the bar just stared at Gokudera wide eyed, as the man was falling apart on stage. Every single one of them, The rain guardian, the cloud guardian, the mist guardian, the sun guardian, the thunder guardian couldn't contain themselves as tears started to fall down their cheeks as well as the heartbreakingly painful music got to them with the pained singing that sound liked an angel but hurt like death itself.
I watched you die
I stood there frozen in shock as I watched Byakuran pull out his gun and fire. That's all it took, one single bullet and down you went
There wasn't much blood, it was a clean kill, straight through the heart, your vital life source. You died instantly a smile on your face. Why are you smiling? Do you really believe that your death will stop this mess?
"Take this away, take it back to your base, mourn for him, because I will be seeking what I want soon enough." Byakuran stated as he walked away a smirk on his face.
I heard you cry
Every night in your sleep
Gokudera and Tsuna weren't together long, it was probably around a year before Tsuna was killed. But even so Gokudera couldn't help but love him. Making love to him. Kissing his beautiful neck, collarbone, shoulders. It was not as if he knew his beloved was going to die
Always after they made love Gokudera would hold Tsuna close to himself, as if he was trying to protect the fragile man. Tsuna always snuggled into his side, kissing his chest and nuzzling his nose into the crook of Gokudera's throat and fall asleep like that.
Gokudera would always watch Tsuna as he slept, he watched as his face twisted into different expressions. But that was until Tsuna kept crying in his sleep, begging whoever he were dreaming about to stop, telling them that he didn't want to die just yet.
Gokudera couldn't handle it. But he put up his wall to keep Tsuna happy for as long as he could when ever Tsuna woke up in the morning.
I was so young
You should have known better than to lean on me
You never thought of anyone else
You just saw your pain
'You died not long ago, I cant believe has only been a week' Gokudera thought to himself as he sung. His voice breaking in some area, just not enough for anyone to actually notice it. 'I cant help but cry, this is how much you mean to me, I always lie away at night and cry thinking of you.'
And now I cry
In the middle of the night
For the same damn thing
Because of you
I will never stray too far from the sidewalk
'Because of you I'm to afraid to move on, to love some one else.'
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side
So I don't get hurt
Because of you
I tried my hardest just to forget everything
Because of you
I don't know how to let anyone else in
Because of you
I'm ashamed of my life because it's empty
Because of you
I am afraid
Because of you I cant trust anyone. Cant you see what you've done to me?
Because of you I will never be the same person that I was
Because of you I will never be able to move on with my life.
Because of you
Because of you
Gokudera finally pulled the microphone away from his mouth, his eyes opening up once again to look at everyone in the room. They all had their heads down, some where crying, some where drinking themselves into oblivion, and some where just emotionless, like he wished he could be.
"As I said earlier this song is dedicated to the person I loved who is now dead."
A month after the singing incident Gokudera went out into the forest where his lovers body and casket lay. Hoping he could talk to him, even if it was only to a dead body. But when he got there he wasn't prepared for what he saw.
"Juudaime…" he whispered into the wind.