***Please enjoy this perverted twoshot about Logan's weird obsession with llamas.***

Logan: Yes. Move that set to the Palm Woods. Now. Okay, I need to touch my llama now. Bye!

Carlos: Think of that statement in a really perverted way.

Kendall: You mean about moving the set?

Carlos: No, I mean about Logan touching a llama!

Logan: What the fuck?

James: I'm confuzzled!

Carlos: Imagine Logan giving a llama a blowjob.

Logan: WHAT?

Kendall: That wasn't in the script!

Director: CUT! Carlos! Stop making everyone think dirty thoughts!

Carlos: Never! It's too much fun! Really, guys, imagine that.

(James closes his eyes and smiles really weirdly.)

Logan: uh…

Carlos: James is gay, remember!?

Logan: Oh, shit.

Kendall: JAMES! STOP IMAGINING LOGAN NAKED!

James: Geez, calm down. I do it all the time…

Carlos: That's what she said.

Logan: Damn it, Carlos! It was already wrong! You didn't have to make it worse!

Carlos: Yes I did. So, Logan, what's the most fun to screw: Llamas, Alpacas, or Guanacos?

Logan: What's a guanaco?

Kendall: You should know. You're screwing them!

James: At least one good thing came out of this…wrong conversation.

Kendall: What's that?

James: We now know that Logan's gay.

Carlos: OH MY GOD!

Kendall: HUH?

Logan: WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

James: In order to give a llama a blowjob, they have to be male.

Logan: I AM NOT GAY!

James: Oh, crap! I got my hopes up!

Kendall: Then why-

Logan: I AM NOT GIVING LLAMAS BLOWJOBS!

Carlos: Yeah , right now you're not, but…

James: I wish I was that lucky-ass llama.

(Awkward silence)

Logan: I don't know what's weirder: Camille telling me that she thinks the vein that pops out of my neck when I'm stressed is adorable (and the author agreeing), or James' comment…

Kendall/Carlos: James' comment.

(All of a sudden, a guy resembling a llama walks over. He has big ears, a snout-ish nose, and a lot of facial hair like fur. He also spits. A lot.)

Llama Guy: Boys! We have to go back to shooting! This episode is supposed to air next week!

(Llama Guy walks away.)

Carlos: You and your llama sex partner have a bit of explaining to do…

James: He looked more like an alpaca to me…

Kendall: I don't wanna know how you can tell…

James: His butt was kinda fucked-up.

Carlos: And you were looking there because?

Logan: Wow, that's disturbing…

Carlos: Hey! It's your fault he's here! Next time use a condom!