Michiru sat rigid in the small funeral ceremony for the blonde she had allowed herself to fall for. Her head was bent as she murmured a soft prayer for the big man upstairs, her heart aching for the woman who laid dead in the casket.

The sound of the gun still echoed in her ears, the questions the cops had asked her haunting her every waking minute. Her sapphire eyes glanced over to see the woman Haruka had loved nearly five years prior, the blonde's sister sitting beside her. Michiru felt her heart clench at how similar Haruka and her sister looked, but she quickly drove the thought from her mind. She had given her wings up for one person, and she now found herself in the human world. She was alone, friendless, and all in all, miserable.

It rained as the lowered the casket into the ground, a police squad coming out to perform a 21-gun salute for the fallen officer. Michiru was past the point of tears, her head aching from her pent up emotions.

"Not doing too well then?" Tate stated almost sadly, causing the shorter woman to nearly ump out of her skin. The service had ended hours before, Michiru staring at the fresh pile of dirt without a clue of what to do next. The angel beside her stretched out his huge wings, and yawned. "I've been looking everywhere for you, kiddo!"

"Why were you looking for me?" She shivered, her teeth chattering. The rain had soaked the blonde's white dress shirt she wore and loose jeans. Michiru didn't know what else to do, so she opted for the one choice she did have; wear Haruka's clothes. Her hair was plastered to her face, her tears long dry, but her nose still ran, causing her face to become a puffy, snotty mess. Mostly, she had the appearance of a very sad, drowned rat.

"I have a message from the man with the plan," he stated simply, snapping his fingers. A pair of huge blue feathered wings sprouted from Michiru's back, a halo settling itself atop her flat hair. Her sapphire eyes turned to him. "He said, a deal is a deal, and you're back in." He nodded, clapping her on the shoulder. Michiru looked at his hand unenthusiastically, the rain still pouring around them.

"Don't touch me," her voice was soft. Tate tilted his head.

"What? I just…Come on, we're going home," he allowed his hand to drop and turned to walk away, Michiru just standing there. "Well, are you coming?"

"Is she up there Tate?" Michiru questioned, her eyes still trained on the pile of dirt. He sighed.

"I can't answer that. The rapture begins any second now, so, we should get out of the way, don't you think?" He walked back over, standing beside her. She felt a fresh batch of tears slide down her cheeks.

"You know, I hated her when I first started guarding her. She was fickle, and a whore. My pride was hurt that I was given the one person in the world that didn't deserve a guardian angel to guard, yet I did it due to my own selfishness! Come to find out that under that cold, cocky, and utterly whoreish exterior was the kindest, most gentle loving woman on the face of the planet! Then, when I finally found out she loved me in return, and after I gave myself to her totally…HE FUCKING KILLS HER!" She screamed to the clouded sky, her voice shrill. She fell to her knees, sobbing, her hands buried in her hands, the large blue wings wrapping around her frail body.

"Michiru…"

"Don't 'Michiru' me you drunken bastard! You knew!"

"I did…"

"I should shove that bottle of whiskey so far up your ass it comes out of your ear!" She growled just as the sky began to darken, lightning skittering across the quickly blackening sky. Michiru's eyes widened as the wind died down.

"Time to go, don't you think?" Tate smiled at her and grasped her wrist lightly, snapping his fingers which sent the two of them soaring into the clouds above. He let go of her small wrist when they reached the sanctuary that was the clouds above. His golden podium had been replaced with a card table, and Jesus was sitting at it, puffing on a cigar. He held five cards in his hand, playing against Buddha, Confucius, and Gandhi.

"Ah! Tate! Get your ass over here and have a seat! We're playing strip poker. Obviously, Buddha is losing!" Jesus cackled, the more rotund man across the table glaring at him.

"I'm always dressed like this you insensitive bastard," he loudly stated, taking a handful of peanuts from the bowl on the table and munching on them. Confucius giggled softly at the two of them bickering.

"See what you miss, Tate? You missed Jesus getting drunk on cheap rum and getting into an argument with the new archangel!" The older man giggled again. Michiru's eyes flew open.

"New archangel?"

"Yes, missy, the one they just sent down to start the rapture. Big gold wings, sandy blonde hair," Buddha said with a smile, looking back to his cards. Jesus started laughing loudly and slapped his knee.

"Ah, shit, Michiru! You didn't think we'd be so fucking heartless as to kill her and not let you two see each other again, didja?" He flicked his beard as if he was trying to appear all intelligent; his blood shot eyes made such a look impossible.

"Well, I…"

"Oh, daddy's had the entire thing planned for years. Haruka was his quarry, and he knew that if he put the right girl in front of her, she'd come out of her play boy ways. Well, he saw how lonely you were up here, and decided to just…play it by ear," he said before taking another long gulp of his beer.

"He knew we'd fall in love?" Michiru's eyes flew open, completely shocked at the newfound knowledge.

"Duh. All knowing, remember? He's not as strict as those damn humans like to think. They just use Him as a control thing, I think. Fuck, He loves lesbian porn. I've seen His collection," Tate took a hit of a joint that Buddha had just lit up. Michiru felt her heart flutter.

"So..when will I get to see her then? When does this rapture shit end so I get to see Haruka again?" She leaned forward; her fingers balled up into fists, anxious, much like a kid in a candy store.

"Whenever the rapture is over, dipshit," Jesus threw his cards down after he said it. "Fucking cards! I can't never win at them. Fuck fuck fuck a donkey!"

"Pretty much the only thing that would have you anyhow, angel boy. Even the whore wouldn't do you," Buddha said as he continued to snack on peanuts.

"Mary Magdalene totally fucked me! All the time! The damn bible just emits all the good stuff that happened back then! Like the orgies. Fuck, it makes me seem like some sort of saint," he chugged on his beer again. Michiru sighed.

"How long is the rapture going to last, Jesus?"

"Fuck if I should know! Shouldn't last too long now that we have the golden-winged one. Dad says we have a really good chance at beating Satan this year with her as quarterback," he nodded, obviously very drunk. Finally, nearly eighteen beers later, his chair tipped over, causing him to lie on the cloud in his drunken stupor.

Nearly six months passed, news from the epic football game below occasionally coming down through the ranks from the head coach himself. Michiru found herself at a loss for words. She had believed the rapture to be a huge war, not a year long football game. She picked her violin back up, beginning to play a soft and light tune, a loud voice echoing through the heavens.

"And the Angels lead, 24-20! Haruka is looking spectacular today! Only six months to go folks!"

Michiru sighed. Six more months of football. First, it was car racing. Everyday. All day. Now, non-stop football. What was it with these fucking morons and sports? She sighed inwardly setting the instrument back in its case, wanting to paint instead.

She waited at the pearly gates like the other angels, waiting to see the team that had been playing for a year and a half, another six months being dedicated to overtime. Michiru craned her neck as the front of the crowd began cheering loudly, a blonde head bobbing in and out of her sight. The petite woman frowned and began to shove through the crowd, her breath catching in her throat as she saw Haruka.

The blonde still looked the same, except now she had the largest golden wings Michiru had ever seen, the bottoms of which dragged the floor as she walked. She wore a navy blue button up and black slacks, smiling and waving to everyone. Michiru wondered if she remembered her, and her fears were suddenly abashed as their eyes met. Haruka dropped the girls hand she had been holding, turning to completely face Michiru. She took a few steps, finding herself in front of the smaller woman, at a loss for words.

"I thought…" Michiru began, but found herself silenced with a deep kiss from the blonde, which resulted in the whoops and cheers of the angels around them.

"I missed you, my Michiru," Haruka murmured against the crook of her neck, causing Michiru to blush, and feel more complete then she had in weeks.

Jesus looked towards his father, gasping.

"DAD! THEY'RE NOT APART OF YOUR PORN!"

A/N: I know it was supposed to be humorous, but we needed the super serious/sad/devastating/killing part to get to this chapter. And yes, I believe that the Rapture is actually an excuse for God and Satan to play the most epic game of football ever. Kind of like the Super Bowl, only so much more awesome. So, there you have it. Haruka wasn't the key, persay, but she was being recruited to be quarterback…

I hope someone got a laugh out of this one!