You sigh as you put the book you were reading, "The Theory of Animals", back on the shelf. You have the information you need for your Life Science homework and are ready to write your report.

You walk along the courtyard's paved walkway as other students dodge you. You, of course, ignore them as best as you can, after all, it's better than getting random vegetables thrown at you.

You need a title for your essay. 'Beast Among Men or Humans in Fur'? No…The 'Beast' part's too…what's the word? Wrong. You're planning on writing mostly about the similarities between the two species, not trying to endorse the ever-growing discrimination in the college and all over Oz. 'A Fur Coated Man'? Better, but still not right.

In your brainstorm you almost pass your building. You make your way up the stairs and to your dorm room, where you hear your perky roommate's mumbles. Her little posse must be busy and she has some gossip that she has to talk about, whether someone's listening or not, or she's finally cracked and is soothing herself in a whisper. Whichever it is, you hope you'll be able to get some quiet time to do your paper.

You try to turn the knob. It's locked. You opt to knock instead of digging through your book bag since you know Galinda's there. There's some shuffling before she opens the door. "Hiya, Elphie!" she chirps, letting you in. "How was that book-renty place…um, what's it called…?"

You roll your eyes. "The library?"

"Yeah, how was the library?"

"Good. I have everything I need for my thesis," you say, hanging your sack up on the coat hanger.

Her eyes dull for a few seconds. She probably has no clue what 'thesis' means. "Oh…okay…"

You go to sit on your bed, but right before your rear hits the mattress Galinda squeaks, "No!"

"What?"

"You'll squash Mackie!"

You stand there, baffled. "Who in Oz is 'Mackie'?" Galinda says something inaudible. "What was that, Miss Upland?"

"She's my bunny…"

Your jaw drops and you yank back your blankets, revealing an auburn rabbit. "How in the Munchkinland did you get A RABBIT!"

"Well, this morning I got up, saw you were already gone so I called ShenShen and asked, 'Would you like to go shopping with me?', she said, 'Sure', so I went into the bathroom, combed my hair, brushed my teeth, put on my makeup, went potty-"

"Cut to the chase, please!"

"Alright, alright. So blah-blah-blah, went shopping, yaddy-yaddy-yadda, so then we decided to go guy watching at the park, but when we got there I spotted this," She gestures to the animal. "adorable little bunny-rabbit!"

"And you decided to bring him here, to a no pets allowed dormitory."

"Oh, I forgot that little detail," she says. She grabs Mackie and puts on her best (and most irresistible to even the coldest heart…well, Morrible's an exception) pout. "You won't tell on us, will you?"

You purse your lips as you sit down at your desk and say, "Fine, but only until you find a better home for him."

She squeals and death-hugs you, so strongly that it almost pushes you over. "Thank you, Elphie, thank you, thank you, thank you!"

"Just promise me you'll actually try to find him an owner," you add as you pull out a blank page and start writing out your name and the date.

"I will, I will, I will!" she says, jumping up and down a tad. She spins around and freezes. "Um, Elphie?"

"Yes?" you say, not even bothering to look over your shoulder and at her.

"Have I ever told you you're the bestest best friend ever?"

You turn around and ask, "What have you done-what the heck is that!"

"Mackie poop," Galinda states, pinching her nose. She's right; there's a little turd lying on your bed.

Galinda backs away to the corner of the room. "Aren't you going to clean that up?" you ask.

"Your bed."

"Your bunny."

She huffs and goes to get paper towels and you go back to your essay's title. "Let's see…" you murmur to yourself in hopes of getting the right name. "'Fanged Men'? No, too threatening. 'Humans With Claws'? Eh, still bad!"

"How about 'Furry People'?" a little voice chimes.

"'Furry People'? Hmm…Not bad…Actually it's pretty good. Not vicious, and the word 'furry' is innocent, it's like mirroring how Animals are as gentle and civil as humans! Galinda, you're a genius!" you shout.

"My name's not Galinda, it's Jaxington." You snap around and there is the rabbit-no, Rabbit. "Where's my momma?"

You can't help but gasp. It's an baby Animal! You walk closer to him and he trembles in fear. "It's okay…I'm not going to hurt you…" you coo, reaching out your hand and petting his soft fur.

"Who are you?" he asks.

"Elphaba, but, if you want to, you can call me Elphie," you say. Elphie is a lot friendlier than Elphaba.

"Are you that scary lady's momma?"

You chuckle. "Nope, I'm her friend."

"The way you tell her what to do sure looks like you're her momma."

"Yeah, well I sometimes feel like it too," you say, rolling your eyes again.

There was a pause before he whimpered, "Where's my momma?"

"Oh, I don't know, but I'll help you find her."

"Really?" You nod. "Thank you." You pick him up and cradle him in your arms, heading to the door.

Just then, Galinda walks in. A smile lights up on her face and she yells (frightening Jaxington in the process), "YAY! I knew you would be friends!"

"Galinda, you're scaring him!" you fuss.

"Where ya taking him? Ooh, maybe we should get her some carrots!"

"No, I'm taking him to his mother. He's a Rabbit," you say, sharpening the 'R' to show the difference between the educated mammals and mindless creatures.

"Well then, why didn't she talk to me when I picked her up?" she snaps, putting her hands on her hips.

"You scare him. Actually you frighten me quite a bit as well."

"Aww! The wittle Bunny-wunny isn't afraid of me, is she? Is she?"

You turn away, shielding him from the obnoxious blond. "First of all, he's a boy. Second, quit it; you're stressing him out," you say before leaving the small room and going out of the building, Galinda dogging you like a stray mutt.

You make your way to the park, where kids are screaming as they play on the slides and jungle gyms, and old women are feeding the gray pidgins.

"Do you know where you live?" you ask Jaxington.

"Yeah!" he says excitedly. Suddenly he wiggles out of your grasp and onto the grass. "Follow me!"

He bursts off like a cat when someone says, 'bath time', with you struggling to keep up with the speedy little boy. You know Galinda isn't behind you; who could run in those stupid heels she loves?

Finally, he slows to a stop, right in front of a tiny thicket. He dashes into the small hole, where you suddenly hear a small uproar. You stay a few minutes, in case he comes back out. Just as you're about to head back, you see a little nose poke out of the entrance. Jaxington comes out with who you guess is Mother Rabbit.

"See momma! I told you she was green!" he yells.

"Jaxington!" she scolds. "Don't be so rude, after all, she might of saved your life." He looks down, ashamed, and puts his paw over his nose in an adorable way. Not many things can make you smile, but this does. The Mother Rabbit looks at you. "Thank you so muchfor bringing little Jaxy home."

"No problem," you say.

She bows her head a little and goes back to their home, with Jaxington chatting rapidly away.

You go through the wooded area and back to Galinda, who's shouting, "ELPHIE! ELPHIE, WHERE THE HECK ARE YOU!"

You decide to sneak up behind her and tap her shoulder. She makes a very gerbil-like noise and spins around, her eyes wider then those pink bangles she's wearing. You're laughing so hard your stomach starts hurting.

"Elphie!" she screams. "That wasn't FUNNY!"

"Looked pretty funny to me," you say matter-of-factly.

"Meanie," she grumbles, pouts for a second, then perks back up. "Where's Mackie?"

"I took him back to him mom."

She then starts tearing up. "But why!"

You roll your eyes (something that's become a habit after rooming with Galinda). "He wanted his mother."

"I COULDA BEEN HIS MOMMY!" she wails.

You start heading back. Galinda shouts, "HEY! We are not DONE HERE!" and follows, yelling at you the entire way.

You get back to the dorm and get started on the actual contents of your essay, but it's hard; Galinda's still fussing, her cries inaudible from the fact that when she's upset it goes to a pitch only wolves can hear, but the bad part is: it's giving you a headache. You put your hands on your ears and start going, "LA-LA-LA-LA-LA-LA…" in hopes she'll shut up.

Finally, you hear a great huff through your palms and she leaves. Just as you remove your hands, the shower kicks on. Good. Showers will relax Galinda and give you the time you need to finish your homework. You start. In the religion of Lurlinism, the creation of Man, Animals, and animals are documented…

~*~

…So, in my analysis, I deem it ignorant and cruel to segregate Humans and Animals in today's modern society.

You sigh and smile. Done, and just in the nick of time.

Galinda walks out of the restroom with a towel wrapped around her head like an alien growth. She plops on her bed. "You know what? I never really wanted a pet anyway. They always die or get boring. One time I had this goldfish named Goldie…"

You inwardly groan. This is going to be a long, long night…

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