I gotta be honest, I have no idea what I'm doing with this. Anyway, if you've been reading my FMA/HP crossover, the reason I haven't updated in forever is cause everytime I try to write some more of it, the only things I can think about is this. Own neither Soul Eater or Bleach. Absolutely no fricken clue how or why Kidd, Liz and Patty are in Soul Society, but rest assured, they are not dead. Excuse any O.O.C. k.k, Tada read on...

The alley was dark and filthy, with the early morning's fog creeping stealthily along, low to the ground, hoping not to be caught by the sun as it rose.

At first, no sound could be heard, but eventually there came the hollow clapping of footsteps, followed not long afterward by their owner, a tall girl with long brunette hair held flat by a white cowboy hat. A white tie hung around her neck. Although there was no person around with which to compare her, one got the feeling that her jeans and navel revealing sleeveless red turtleneck were out of place with the standard fare of dress here.

As she stepped closer, you could see her hugging herself and glancing nervously into the fog every few seconds. This behavior became justified when you heard what she was muttering under her breathe. "…no such thing as ghosts, there's no such thing as ghosts, there's no such thing as…" A sudden noise made her jump. She turned slowly around to see two figures that had previously gone unnoticed emerge from the grimy darkness. Surprisingly enough, as she recognized these dangerous thugs for what they were, her fear suddenly seemed to leave her. The girl straightened up, her eyes grew cold and hard, her hands at the ready for a fight.

"Well, what do we have here? We don't usually get your kind, but then, I've never been one to turn down a gift." The first leered. The second came out and stood beside him. At first he bore a smug grin, same as his companion, but as he got a better look at the girl it changed to one of slight puzzlement, as if he vaguely recognized the girl and was trying to place her. "My kind, huh? And what exactly would that be, hmm?" The brunette asked, crossing her arms, not in the least intimidated. "Certainly not your kind, as I've made it a point not to hang with such fucking loser gangbanger wannabes, not since a long time. If you really knew my kind, you'd be shitting your pants right now." Even for someone who had never met her, this kind of language and attitude seemed shocking coming from her, but almost natural as well. A side of herself that she hadn't had to play for a long while. The first man growled, and pulled out a knife. "What's that you say, bitch? You don't know who you're messing with!" "Oh, I don't, do I? I think you're the one in over your head. So, you want your brains blown out, is it? 'Cause it seems to me that you're just begging me to blow off your head." She grinned, and made an 'L' with the thumb and forefinger of her right hand, pretending to aim a gun. "Why you little…!" The man made a lunge for her, but the second, a look of sheer terror on his face, grabbed his friend by the arm and yanked him back. It seems he had finally remembered where he had last meet the girl in red. "Dude, we gotta get outta here. She'll really do it, man. That's one of the Demon Thompson sisters! She'll kill us both." "Who? I've never heard of them before." "They're bad news, man. And if she's here, the younger one can't be to far away. That chick is psychotic!" The first looked a little disbelieving, but let his companion drag him away after seeing how shaken up he was. And the girl just stood there, hand on hip, smirking.

Once she was sure that they were both out of sight and out of hearing, the grin dropped from her face and the girl breathed a deep sigh of relief. "That was a close one, Liz." She chided herself. "It's been a long time since you've had to live on the streets. Bravado is important, but I'm not entirely sure you could have fought your way out of that one anymore, not without Patty or Kidd. You're lucky that guy recognized you." She paused for a moment, confused. He looked a little familiar. She thought his name might have been Tony something. But she had heard he'd been killed in a gang war, long before she had gone to live with Kidd. She shrugged. Gossip wasn't always reliable. And it might not have been Tony anyway. "But that really is the important thing right now. I have no idea where I am, or where Patty and Kidd are. First priority is finding them." She set off again, this time with a determination visible in her step.

Kenpachi Zaraki, Captain of the feared 11th division of the 13 Court Guards, and one of the strongest shinigami living, could not find his lieutenant. Although his outward demeanor was one of mostly annoyance blended with indifference, inside he was just a little bit worried. He knew the little pink haired girl could take care of herself, (he would never have made her his lieutenant if he did not know this to be true) but regardless, he liked knowing where she was. He had a bag of candy with him, hoping the smell would draw her out. Eventually the sound of loud obnoxious giggling drew him to a courtyard where he spotted the familiar bubblegum pink head. But there was someone else with her, not wearing the standard uniform of the shinigami. A ryoka? He drew his sword.

Patty zoomed around the courtyard, arms spread out wide in imitation of an airplane while the younger girl clung to her back, both of them laughing hysterically. She stopped abruptly. "Awww, why'd you stop, Patty?" Yachiru whined, climbing up onto Patty's head, before jumping off. "I smell candy!" Patty announced happily. "Maybe it's Kidd! That must be why I can't find him! Kidd and Patty went off to buy us candy!" Yachiru cheered and the two girls began jumping up and down, and peering over walls to try and see which direction Kidd would be coming from. But to both the girls' surprise, it wasn't Kidd who stepped though the entryway. "Ohhhhh!!!" Patty announced, staring in wonder at the large and scary looking man standing before her. "You're as tall as a giraffe, but you have funny hair like a lion." She giggled. "Are you a liraffe?" Kenpachi looked a little confused, but regardless drew his zanpakuto. "Step away, Ryoka, or be prepared to fight." The girl still hadn't stopped giggling, so the captain took that as a free invitation. The girl easily dodged his swing, but looked confused and upset as to why he was attacking her. Then an entirely different look overtook her. A look insane and murderous enough to surpass even Zaraki's own when he was in the midst of a battle.

Before he had time to comprehend this, a fist rapidly closed into his field of vision, and smashed his nose. It broke in a loud crunch of cartilage and a splurt of blood. Insane eyes gleamed up at him from within an angelic face ringed with short blonde hair. "If you take a step closer I'm going to *****ing rip out your *****ing ***** and shove it down your ***** so far you'll never be able to ***** again. Sound like fun?" She asked, licking her lips in anticipation. "Huh. Maybe you'll be interesting after all" He announced with a smile, wiping the blood off with the back of the hand holding the blade, while the other blocked another fist heading his way. Then there was a sharp tugging and his head jerked back. "Kenny!" Yachiro whined from her place on his shoulders, tugging his hair spikes like reigns. He gave her a look, but receiving such a look in return, placed his sword back in the scabbard. "Patty, its o.k. Kenny is a friend." She said, leaving over his shoulder so Patty could see her. The blonde blinked, and the murderous aura disappeared as if it had never been there. She laughed and jumped at the large man, giving him a big bear hug. "I'm Patty." Then she pulled a bag hanging beside his sword free, and scampered up his back to sit beside the lieutenant, lifting the bag high in triumph. "I found the candy!"

"So, wait. I think I've figured out what the confusion here is. For all of you, being shinigami isn't what you are, it's what you do." There came protests coming from the ring of black clad shinigami surrounding the elder sister. "No no wait, let me finish. You are all souls of the deceased, correct?" There came a reply in the affirmative. "And really, the only difference between all of you, and those who live in the Rukongai, is that everyone here has a heightened spiritual energy. So, it's more like a job requirement. 'Cause being shinigami is your job. But for all that, there is no difference. Nothing that physically separates you from the non-shinigami. Everyone in this realm is just as human as everyone back in the living world."

"That is an extremely simplified explanation, but I suppose there is no fault with the logic." Captain Hitsugaya conceded from his position leaning against the wall. Liz nodded, satisfied. "See! That's the difference! Kidd is…well, Kidd isn't dead. And Kidd isn't human. Isn't, never was, and never will be. Shinigami is his species." There were gasps, and loud denouncements, exclamations of "Such a thing isn't possible!" and "Then how have we never heard of this before?" Liz sighed. "I guarantee you, every word of it is true. As for why you've never heard it before, well, I really can't tell you. The existence of shinigami isn't exactly kept a secret, any more than the existence of weapons, but most people don't about them anyway. I guess it's because we're not really something that affects peoples' everyday lives, and until recently, Shinigami was the only shinigami. No one was really expecting Kidd, you know? I'm not even sure Shinigami himself knew it was possible." She gave a hesitant laugh. "Kid's never really talked about it before, and I'm too afraid to ask."

Matsumoto paused her, confused. "If the only two shinigami, as a species, who exist in the living world are the original, and his kid, then…why did you say 'we'? When you said 'we aren't really something that affects peoples' everyday lives.'" Liz was about to answer when Renji put in "And how exactly would the existence of weapons be something people are unaware of? I mean, people get murdered all the time, and it's not like people don't notice." The brunette laughed. "No, you misunderstand. The answer to both your questions is the same. I'm not shinigami, but what I am is a weapon. I don't mean like an inanimate sword like the one you carry in your hand," She flicked out a hand in gesture towards Zabimaru, Renji's zanpakuto, before continuing "but a weapon like me!" Soi Fon asked "So, by calling yourself a weapon… you mean that in your world, you are a soldier?" at the same moment that Renji exploded with "Zabimaru is not just a sword! All zanpakuto all alive!" Liz looked shocked, and a little worried. "Let me see Zabimaru, then. Introduce me." She asked in a shaken voice. Renji, who took this to mean that she did not believe him, answered harshly. "Zanpakuto spirits reside in a different plane than our own. One can not just summon them here in a corporal form at will, although some of the captains can." Liz shook her head. "It's…not the same then. You…none of you…you really don't know." She took a deep breathe as if to steady herself after some dreadful realization. When she looked around at the circle of soul reapers surrounding her, she gave a sigh worried and resigned. "O.K, I guess this really is the only way to decently explain. Just…someone make sure to catch me, alright?"

The soul reapers may not have understood what the cryptic comment meant at the time, but they wouldn't have long to wait. Where Liz was standing, there instead appeared a small column of light that narrowed as it stretched upward, at the peak of its height dissipating to reveal a gleaming metal instrument only slightly larger than someone's hand. As it tumbled down, Hitsugaya, the first to regain his composure, kicked Renji forward so that he stumbled, and as his arms outstretched to catch his fall, the object landed safely in his hands.

The red-haired Lieutenant checked his fall at the last moment, staring in wonder and confusion at the weapon. "It's…it's a gun." He said, completely bewildered. One of the nameless lesser ranked shinigami nearby asked, "But where did the girl go?" Soi Fon snapped at him. "You idiot. Where do you think?" Matsumoto stepped forward, wary. "Liz, is that you?" The surface of the pistol gleamed, and in the reflection of the barrel, Liz's face appeared. "Of course it's me. I said I was a weapon, didn't I?" The reflection grinned sheepishly. "Sorry if I shocked you, but I knew you really wouldn't understand it otherwise." "You aren't human, then." Hitsugaya stated outright. "Gee, that kinda hurts." Lisa said, her face showing, indeed, hurt and some bit of indignation. "I'm certainly human enough. Having weapon blood isn't really all that uncommon. For some of us, it's even a status symbol. My friend Tsubaki comes from a very long and prestigious line of weapons. A Noble family." Hitsugaya raised an eyebrow, fingering his sword. "But are you human? Or are you something else? A threat that needs to be destroyed." "I'm human in all the ways that matter!" Liz shouted angrily. "I don't need to justify myself to you. Just help me find my meister." Her voice had gotten softer. "I may not know how we got here, but he will. If we find him, he'll know where we can find Patty, and he'll get us home. Then you won't have to worry about us bothering you ever again. I just…I just want to find him as soon as possible." Matsumoto took Liz from Renji. "It sounds to me like you're more worried about him than for yourself." The weapon was surprised that the lieutenant had caught onto this. "But if this Kidd really is this all powerful being that you claim he is, what's there to worry about?" Renji inquired, crossing his arms. "Kidd could probably defeat more enemies empty-handed than most meisters back at Shibusen using their weapons, and with ease. But the fact remains, shinigami or not, he's not full grown. He hasn't come all the way into his powers yet, so it's still possible for him to be killed. Plus, he has this…condition. He's probably fine, but I still worry about him, you know. So please…just help me find him. That's all I ask." The surface of the gun flashed again, and the face of the girl disappeared so that once again the pistol appeared to be nothing but that, an ordinary pistol.

Hitsugaya sighed, then nodded his head at Renji. "Renji, why don't you take…Liz…and start the search. I'll inform Captain Kuchiki where you've gone. And I suppose all the other captains need to know we have two missing ryoka." The small captain shunpoed away. Matsumoto dropped the pistol back into Renji's hands, this time ready for her. "Hope you find your sister." Then a knowing smile. "And Kidd." Then the lieutenant took off her captain.

When the rankless shinigami had dispersed, only Soi Fon and Renji remained. Renji was experimenting different poses with the gun. "I've never used a gun before. How does this thing work again?" He questioned aloud as the Captain of 2nd division watched impatiently. "Oh, yeah. You pull this thing, right?" "The trigger." Soi Fon said. "Yeah, the trigger." Renji repeated, without giving his full attention. He swirled around, pointing the pistol at a tree. He flashed an excited grin at the captain standing at the side. "Let's give it a try." Liz's face flashed back across the surface of the gun, as a loud "No!" rang out, but it was too late. Renji's finger had already tightened, pulling the trigger back.

No shot rang out, but instead there was a loud hiss and the smell of burnt flesh simmered into the air. The gun in the red-haired man's hands was glowing cherry red, soliciting a loud yell of pain. The gun was dropped, clattering across the wood floor, before becoming a young woman again, rubbing her head as if she had hit it against something and was seeing stars. Soi Fon was already at Renji's side, inspecting the burnt hands. "2nd degree burns…" She murmured, before glaring at the weapon and drawing her zanpakuto against her.

"Are you crazy?" Liz shouted at Renji, ignoring the captain's obvious intent to hurt. "You don't know how to use a gun! You could have killed someone! Even if you were experienced with firearms, the only ones who can wield me are either my sister or my meister. I'm sorry you were hurt, but if you weren't so utterly impulsive and thoughtless, then maybe my soul's wavelength wouldn't have reacted so violently against yours!" Soi Fon took this outburst in stride, seeming to accept it as sufficient proof that this was not a conscious attack against her fellow shinigami. She wrapped Renji's hands in strips of cloth, then told him "You had better go check those with 4th Company. I'll conduct the search." She glanced at Liz, then made a vague gesture with her hands. The girl looked confused for a moment, then comprehending. "Are you sure?" "It will facilitate the search greatly if I can carry you while I shunpo. Can you guarantee your 'soul wavelength' will not do me harm?" Liz smiled. "No so long as you don't attempt to fire me, or use me in a fight." "Then let's find your meister." A real, warm smile broke through the girl's until now only worried or angry countenance." "Thank you." The gun flashed into the air, landing neatly in Soi Fon's hands. The demon pistol was slipped into a sash around the shinigami girl's waist, and then the two were gone.