Disclaimer: I don't own any part of the Star Trek franchise or the characters in it.

The mess hall was buzzing with activity, then the captain walked in. Conversations were muted as all eyes turned towards Kirk. The whole room waited...

Kirk walked up to the nearest replicator. "Ham sandwich and coffee," he ordered.

People craned their necks trying to see where he was hiding it. One man almost fell out of his seat.

Kirk glanced around. People picked at their meals, hoping he didn't catch them staring. His gaze landed on Sulu and Chekov's table.

"How's it going?", Kirk asked as he joined their table.

Sulu smiled nervously in response. I almost killed him, he thought. What do I say?

Chekov continued to stare at his yogurt, as if would give him the answers to all of life's greatest questions like: how do I get away from deh keptin?

The resulting awkward silence was long and... awkward, but Kirk didn't seem to care. He began to talk excitedly about the shore-leave that was coming up, obviously in a good mood. Eventually he finished his lunch and bid the two men farewell.

As they watched him leave, Chekov slumped in his chair while Sulu let out a quiet sigh of relief. The mess hall was abuzz with speculation as everyone wondered why the Captain hadn't eaten any apples yet...

A week later, the crew was still guessing as to why he had stopped eating the red fruit.

Walking down the halls of his ship, Kirk wondered how long it would take before everyone realized he'd just been messing with them.

He shook his head, smiling.

A/N: The last chapter, yay! I hope you enjoyed it. I was going to included Cupcake in this one, but that wouldn't have been fair to Rand and Chapel. Oh well. Speaking of unfair, does anyone think I should redo Spock's chapter? It's really short, even compared to all the other ones. If you want to see it redone and/or have any ideas for it, please review! You should review anyway though. =)