Title: Bye Bye Baby

Disclaimer: Yeah, I wish.

Summary: Hiro had an emotional rollercoaster of a relationship with Ayaka. Suguru had a long line of one-night stands behind him. What happens when they switch tactics…and focus on each other?

Author's Notes: Last chapter! Don't hate me?

Chapter 13: Bye Bye Baby

"It's not just that I'm selfish and scared. It's not just that I'm so unprepared."

Suguru paused outside of NG Studios and stared quietly at the tall building. On a normal day, the studio would have been a reprieve from his mother and father and their talk of XMR. Now, it was nothing of the sort. He took in a slow, deep breath, steeled himself, and walked inside. With each and every step, his nerves wound tighter and tighter.

…There was no way he could do this, he suddenly realized, hand clenching tighter around the backpack strap over his shoulder. He wasn't even in the same damn room as Hiro and he was already on edge. Where was the legendary Seguchi family composure?

He finished his walk through the building and silently slipped into the recording room. Shuichi was gesturing widely at K for some inexplicable reason, Sakano weeping on the side of them. And there was Hiro, laughing at whatever the situation was, expression light.

Suguru simply wanted to run away. Everything inside twisted together in a ridiculous mess, his breath catching in the tangles. Yes, he was right. There was no way he could continue his work, here, with Hiro. Not after…

"I'm not in love with you."

The simple thought hurt, all those emotional knots vanishing in dark hole.

Yet, he was a professional, was he not? He would have to do it, in order to continue his music. He would have to. His knuckles went white with the strength of his grip. Ducking his head, he continued into the room. As long as he did not look or interact with Hiro, he would be okay. Maybe. He sat at the table and concerned himself with pulling out all his notes.

Counterpoint to his thoughts, Hiro turned his gaze from Shuichi to Suguru. There was something like concern (no, no there wasn't, there couldn't be anything like that) in his dark eyes along with some other shifting emotion that Suguru couldn't quite pin. "Hey, Suguru," Hiro said, the smile on his face wan and almost nervous. "How are you?"

Suguru pushed away the insane urge to laugh. Speaking automatically, Suguru tried to keep his mind blank. Three hours later, when K actually allowed them to go get lunch (since they didn't have any work left), he had come to a decision.

Hiro snatched an onigiri from Shuichi's plate and watched as his friend flailed ineffectually at him. Although Shuichi pouted and wailed at him for stealing, it didn't quite remove the leaden weight in his stomach. It was almost ridiculous, how he was reacting like this. The only thing that had changed was his thing with Suguru and ever since last night…everything had felt off, wrong.

But it couldn't be that, could it? He didn't love Suguru, he knew that much. And yet…

No. He had done the right thing, breaking things off with Suguru. It was better this way.

Shuichi whined, "Hiro, what's wrong?" and threw his arms around Hiro's neck playfully.

Sighing, Hiro pushed his friend away. "Nothing."

Shuichi leaned away from him and eyed him up and down critically. "Something is," he sang, poking Hiro in the side with one finger.

Hiro batted at the hand. "No. I…," and then he trailed off because it still felt wrong to say it. "I broke things off with Suguru."

Shuichi paused. "You said it was just sex though, Hiro."

"Yeah, but…," and nothing was there to fill in that sentence.

Shuichi watched him expectantly. Then he frowned. "That explains why Fujisaki's acting weird."

"Weird?" So he hadn't been imaging that…

"Yeah. Acting more like Tohma than usual."

Hiro let the comment pass without saying anything and let the conversation drift into another direction. Despite this, his mind was replaying this morning, over and over again, analyzing every action, every word, every glance, in a new perspective.

When they went back to the studio to finish wrapping up the album, Suguru did not show up. K muttered something in English that Hiro didn't catch, but he surprisingly didn't go for his gun and he didn't chase their missing band member down. Instead, they continued working without him.

Suguru knocked on the door and then after a minute, he opened it and poked his head into the room. Tohma was on the phone, but he waved Suguru into the room anyway. Suguru shut the door quietly behind him and walked in, curling up in the chair in front of Tohma's desk.

Suguru kept his gaze on the wood grain of the desk, letting the soft murmur of the conversation wash over his thoughts. He kept going back to soft smiles and strong hands and dark eyes and bright smiles and even brighter laughter. It was both painful and distracting.

Tohma ended the conversation and set the phone down in the cradle with a soft click. Then he laced his fingers together in front of him and stared levelly at Suguru. "Is there something you wanted, cousin?"

Suguru shut his eyes for a moment. Then he opened them again and met Tohma's gaze head-on. "I wish to transfer to XMR Company."

Tohma leaned back in his seat. "In New York?"

"Yes." Suguru could see the calculation, the measuring, in those sharp eyes, and it made him feel cornered. "Where else would it be?" he snipped.

Tohma mouth's pursed down in a frown. "What happened to you and Nakano-san?"

Suguru dug his fingers into the arms of the chair and leaned his head back so he was staring at the ceiling. "You already know what happened," he said tiredly.

From Tohma, "Yes, but are you sure you want to do something like this?"

Suguru let out a sigh. "It'll get mother and father off my back, I'll get away from Hiro…what more could I want?"

The chair creaked as Tohma shifted his weight. "What about your name as the keyboardist of Bad Luck?"

Suguru curled his fingers deeper into the chair until he felt the strain on his bones. "I could make a name for myself elsewhere," he muttered quietly.

"Are you sure you want this?" Tohma's voice was hushed as he repeated his question.

Lifting his head, Suguru looked at his cousin. "I'm here, aren't I?"

Tohma sighed and leaned forward. "I'll get the paperwork ready and call the president of XMR. The earliest possible time you'll be able to go is," he shuffled through a few papers, "in a week."

"Alright," Suguru muttered. The heavy weight in his stomach lightened the tiniest bit.

Another shuffle of papers and Tohma added, "I see that you're done with this album, so Bad Luck will just have a few days off as a…break." There was something like a smile hiding in the corners of Tohma's mouth.

Sometimes, having Tohma Seguchi as a family member paid off.

"Thanks," Suguru said softly. He stood and walked out of the office feeling lighter than he had when he had entered. He would have to grab his bag out of the recording studio, which wouldn't be a problem since K had let everyone go to lunch and they would still be out. He did just that and then left NG Studio for the last time.

Surprisingly, K gave them a week off. They still had some clean-up left on a few songs, but for the most part, they were done with this album. He spent most of the week with Shuichi, distracting himself at night with phone calls to Ayaka (who was getting along just well with her new friend Kojiro) and Yuuji (who was ecstatic in his new acting part). Part of him wanted to pick up the phone and call Suguru up, see if they could hang out or something, but just the thought of doing so made his stomach twist unpleasantly and his hands clench into fists. Strange, that.

Maybe it was just the guilt. He had thought over everything and he knew that he hurt Suguru. Using somebody like that, somebody who had become a friend…

Just the thought of somebody doing that to Shuichi made his fury rise. He wasn't in love with Suguru and, thank god, Suguru wasn't in love with him, but it was still a horrible move. But Hiro pushed the thought away and continued with his break, despite the foreboding feeling that was growing.

The next week, he went back to work. Shuichi was there, causing his usual chaos. K, guns shined to a gleaming silver, was in the corner with a young man. The young man wasn't particularly imposing or particularly good-looking, but he was talking quietly with K, hands moving in emphasis of something or other.

Sakano walked into the room, a folder clenched in his hands. The room going silent at his entrance, Sakano adjusted his glasses and cleared his throat nervously. "Shindou-san, Nakano-san," he started. "We have…some news about Bad Luck."

With that look it could only be bad news. Hiro's hands clenched tighter around the neck of his guitar.

Sakano waved a hand at the young man. "This is Murakami Fugaku-san. He will be the new keyboardist of Bad Luck."

Shuichi's jaw dropped. "WHAT? What do you mean 'new keyboardist'? Where's Fujisaki?" There was an angry shine to those violet eyes.

It felt like someone punched Hiro straight in the solar plexus. He struggled for breath and everything seemed to go numb. His stomach decided it couldn't deal with the hollowness in his chest, decided it liked his feet, and stayed there uncomfortably.

Sakano shifted in his spot. This Fugaku-san looked out of place next to K. Sakano continued, "Fujisaki has transferred to XMR Company…in New York."

Shuichi's eyes went wide as breath completely left Hiro. "New York? As in AMERICA? WHY?"

Sakano went pale. "I'm sorry," he wailed. "It's just XMR offered a transfer for him and he accepted. Sacho-sama endorsed it himself!"

Shuichi sunk back in his seat. "He just…left?" Then, in righteous anger, "THAT BASTARD!" He was off on a tangent, completely ignoring how Fugaku-san's pallor increased at his angered flailings.

Sakano wiped at his brow and offered, "XMR is a wonderful company and Fujisaki-san gets out of the light of Sacho-sama."

Hiro forced out, "What do you mean by that?"

Adjusting his glasses again, Sakano continued, "Even though it hasn't been confirmed by the media, there have been rumors about Fujisaki-san's relation to Sacho-sama…and how Fujisaki-san only got into NG because of that." He coughed into his fist. "All rumors, of course, but in America he will get out of that light and…can make a name for himself there."

Still by his toes, Hiro's stomach squirmed. "Oh," he muttered emptily.

Shuichi took that in and cried, "That doesn't mean he had to leave." He leveled a glare at Sakano.

Sakano gulped. "Actually, it makes quite a bit of sense, especially if Fujisaki-san wants to prove his skill." He gestured at Fugaku-san again. "And this will be his replacement."

Shuichi marched up to the guy and started inspecting him.

Hiro sunk back into his seat, fingers idly strumming over guitar strings. Suguru…was gone. Completely out of reach, out of touch, off in America, half-way around the world.

They may have been almost friends, but it didn't matter! It wasn't as if they were in love. After all, he didn't love Suguru. The guilt rose up. Suguru may have been hurt, he told himself, but Suguru didn't love him. And he didn't love Suguru. No, he did not.

He

(Suguru at the keyboard, smiling lightly, as they played together, occasionally breaking off to make some note or another or comment about Hiro's side of the music)

did

(Suguru dancing, glitter shimmering wildly in his dark hair, on his pale skin; all shadows and flashing lights, beautiful with his free smile and his carefree laughter)

not

(Suguru gesturing calmly as he explained something or other over dinner, eyes shining as they talked good-naturedly over anything and everything)

love

(Suguru lying on his bed, curled in the sheets, looking as if he completely belonged there, on Hiro's bed, sprawled out next to Hiro, expression soft and tender)

Suguru.

(Suguru pressed against him, mouth warm and pliant beneath Hiro's; the taste of vanilla ice cream cool on Suguru's tongue; the sound in the back of his throat as Hiro pulled him closer)

He did…

Oh.

The minor chord twanged strangely in his ears.

In the Tokyo airport, Suguru sighed. The latest Bad Luck album was in his hands, completely shiny and new. All their new songs…all the songs he had worked on with Shindou-san and Hiro…Nakano-san.

At the desk the stewardess called out his flight number. His plane to New York was boarding.

He ran a glance over the cover of the CD. Shindou-san, in his usual skimpy clothes with his usual wild, bright grin. Himself, smirking just the tiniest bit at his keyboard. And Hiro—Nakano-san—smiling widely with his guitar in his hands. He drew his fingers over the smile and remembered it pressed against his skin.

The stewardess called out his flight again.

Standing, Suguru gathered his bags and started walking. When he passed a trashcan, he hesitated and then slid the sample CD into it. He boarded his plane. And he didn't look back.

FIN

Look out for the sequel: "Maybe, This Time"! Coming to a website near you.