Sorry everyone, it has been a while! Work and life have been demanding a lot of my time and energy. I hope you enjoy the new chapter and as always, I love hearing from you. =)

Chapter 17

A soft beeping and the low hum of machinery wove through the heavy oblivion that cocconed her and Shepard stirred to wakefulness. The sheets were cool against her cheek and she shifted, opening her eyes. Her movements were leaden, aimless. This is starting to become a very unfortunate habit, Shepard thought hazily as the scent of sterilizing chemicals bit into her nostrils. Shepard wrinkled her nose at the smell, a wash of unpleasant memories flooding her. She sighed, and winced as her ribs throbbed in protest. All she needed was for some asshole to start shoving needles in her and everything would come full circle.

"Shepard –" Talons reached out of the darkness, brushing her cheek.

The room shattered in a blaze of blue and white. Pain stabbed through her arm as she tore free of the IV. Shepard scrambled off the bed, voiceless, mindless, her throat locked on a scream as her heart slammed against her ribs like a caged animal. Biotics crackled up her arm as she threw the turian aside. Shepard hit the floor with a thud, scrambling backwards on legs that had suddenly gone to rubber. Her entire body was glowing, buzzing with energy that massed around her like an angry swarm. Her breath hissed in and out of her lungs as her blood turned to ice. Fear spiked up her spine and thrust thorny tendrils into her brain.

Her back hit the wall and she put out a hand toward the room, illuminating it in flickering blue.

On the opposite end of the med bay, Garrus grabbed the counter next to him and levered himself to his feet, staring at her. His mandibles twitched, his free hand clenching tightly. "Shepard –" He took a step toward her and she winced. He stopped immediately, mandibles slack. His shoulders dropped as the breath rushed out of him.

Her pulse stuttered and the adrenalin stagnated in her veins, turning muddy and bitter. She couldn't read the expression in his eyes, couldn't answer the questions in them, and then she couldn't meet them. She dropped her gaze, drawing her knees in as utter shame washed through her.

She drew in one shaking breath, then another as he crossed the room slowly. He moved as though he was approaching a wild animal – God, she couldn't blame him – and she clenched her fists, willing her biotics back under her skin. They fought her, hissing like wasps around her body. Blood seeped beneath her nails as they bit into her palms. Shepard closed her eyes, forcing herself to focus on the solidity of the wall behind her, the floor beneath her.

The turian in front of her.

He knelt a foot or two away from her, his face still and clear of expression. "You're bleeding." He rummaged through the drawer above her, offered her a ball of cotton. Her fingers passed through it.

The hair on the back of her neck stood up and his brows rose a fraction before he wiped the surprise from his face. "You should let Chakwas should look at you."

Hot rage swept through her without warning. Power coiled up her arm, demanding a target. She inhaled, focusing on forcing solidity back to her body. "Garrus, I've had about all the medical attention I can stand."

Her hand passed through his twice more before she could take the cotton he offered her. Her lip stung as she blotted the blood. Red bloomed on a white field, bright as holly in snow. He rolled his shoulder where she has thrown him into the wall, mandibles tight with discomfort. "Sorry," she whispered.

"You have nothing to be sorry about." She flinched at the softness of his voice.

"I could have –"

He touched her free hand lightly where it wrapped around her knees, the knuckles bone-white. "It was an accident." His eyes were steady. His fingers curled around hers. "May I?"

She nodded. Garrus shifted so that they were side by side, leaning back against the wall with her. He still held her hand loosely in his, seemingly unfazed by the biotics that still clung to her like static or the way her body seemed to phase in and out. She could feel herself shaking, forced her muscles go slack.

Minutes ticked by and he did nothing more than sit next to her, keeping her hand in his. She glanced over at him and found his eyes on her.

Her breath shuddered and Shepard felt some of the tension drain from her. The biotics slowly began to dwindle from her hand, wrapping them in shadows. His talons brushed over her fingers lightly and her eyes stung. She reached for words, found herself empty. Shepard rested her head on his shoulder instead, letting the moments pass in silence. His armor pressed against the bruise on her cheek.

"You were talking in your sleep." he said.

Her eyes flicked up. His free hand drifted to her cheek, soft as a breath. The blue of his eyes undid her. "Garrus–"

His hand moved gently through her hair. "I don't know what happened. But I want to help you through it. Just tell me what you need."

The dry, chemical smell of the med bay woke pinpricks in her memory, tubes and wires wrapping her in an insidious web, needles flooding her body with poison. She reached for words again, and this time she found them.

"I need to get out of this room."

She rose slowly, limbs aching, hands shaking. She clenched them into fists.

He stood with her.

"Easy. The bullet passed partway through your body. Chakwas is going to murder me for letting you out of bed."

She straightened. Her whole body felt like an open wound. "You can tell her I jumped out myself."

He snorted. "Like that will help." The door swished open as they approached, the turian keeping careful pace with her. "Where to?"

To burn the Shadow Broker's base to the ground and dance in the ashes she thought. A flicker of blue chased down her arm. She glanced up at him to find his eyes moving over her face, assessing, intimate. Whatever he saw there made his brow plates knit.

She glanced back down. Her jaw clenched. "Just . . . not here."

She stopped short as the dim lights illuminated a long hallway. "Where are we?"

His mandibles twitched in a wry smile. "A Cerberus facility on Terra Nova. I'm told that, as far as the rest of the galaxy is concerned, it's a privately funded nature preserve. Keeps the prying bureaucrats out."

Her brows snapped together. "The Normandy's med bay couldn't handle things? I wasn't that badly off."

"You weren't exactly in peak condition, Shepard."

"Garrus, you got half your face shot off by a rocket, and Chakwas was able to patch you up on the ship."

He shifted from foot to foot, giving the impression of a large, uneasy cat. "You might have, ah, blown up the med bay by accident. You woke up once before, when Chakwas first started treating the bullet hole and –"

"And it turns out you really don't like needles, Commander. Or disinfectant. Or med bays." Joker stepped out of a nearby doorway. "Was it all the beeping machines, or were you just miffed they wouldn't give you the good painkillers?"

"Joker," Garrus began.

Shepard put a hand on his arm. "It's ok." A smile tugged reluctantly at her mouth. "It's nice to know you missed me, Joker."

He hobbled forward. "Yeah, I know, I'm getting saccharine in my old age." He stopped in front of her and she reached out and hugged him tightly. "Ribs!"

Shepard stepped back sheepishly. "Sorry."

He winced as she released him. "Don't worry about it, Commander. I think you only bruised five or six." Joker looked over at Garrus. "I'll let Miranda know Shepard's with you. Save her the trouble of tearing the base apart when she finds out you're playing hooky."

"Thanks Joker," Garrus said as the pilot walked away.

Joker waved over his shoulder. "Chakwas is going to kill you, you know that, right?"

"I'm getting that impression, yeah," Garrus commented. He touched Shepard's shoulder. "This way, Shepard."

Her ribs ached with every step. It occurred to her that the painkillers Chakwas had put her on were not enough, but she crushed the thought. Too many drugs had been pumped through her body already. The overhead lights followed them down the corridor, lighting the hall in front of them and dimming as soon as they had passed. Wisps of air brushed her cheek as the ventilation hummed to life "What time is it?"

"Somewhere between two and three a.m. Chakwas kicked everyone out a few hours ago after she made it clear you wouldn't be up until morning. Even herded the on-base doctor out of his own med bay."

"And you what, refused to leave my side?" Shepard smiled crookedly. Her lip stung, but she held the expression gamely.

Humor warmed his voice, deepening the reverberations. "I told Dr. Chakwas I would be staying awake anyway working some kinks out of the Normandy's weapons software and I could just as easily do it while keeping an eye on you. Once I started to explain the algorithms, her eyes glazed over."

Her breath hitched on a laugh. "I see. You bored her into compliance."

"It's so nice to have a woman who appreciates me for my body and not my brilliance," he quipped. "Frankly, it was easier than trying to charm everyone out of the room."

"Oh?"

"Grunt tried to guilt Chakwas into letting him stay. Have you ever seen a krogan pout?"

Shepard chuckled and pain spiderwebbed across her ribs. "Don't make me laugh. Everything hurts enough already."

The hall widened into a quietly elegant foyer, plated walls giving way to tall windows. The faint smell of leather and cedar hung in the air. Twin moons cast a pearly light over a silver shore and gilded the dark waves. Sand reeds fanned back and forth in a slight breeze, pale violet and slender as stilettos. Scatters of stars tumbled across the sky in a fiery field, suspended in a cloudy pillar of the Milky Way's arm.

With a quiet hiss, the doorway opened to the night. Cold sand crumbled under her bare feet and goosebumps rippled over her skin as the breeze off the ocean picked at the thin cotton of her clothes.

Garrus led her down the beach until they came to rest in the slope of a dune. The sharp salt tang of the sea washed away the chemical scents of the med bay. The tide beat steadily against the shore in a low susurrus, soothing the hum in her veins. Her ribs protested as she lowered herself to the sand until she was sitting beside him.

They sat in companionable silence a few moments before Shepard looked sidelong at him. She sensed questions lurking in him, but there was nothing but patience in his face.

Shepard looked down, digging her toes into the sand. "Was anyone hurt in the raid?"

"Bruises and scrapes. Jacob dislocated Jack's arm trying to keep her from going after a group of Broker agents, but it's been seen to. Liara –" he paused, brow furrowing. His mandibles flicked outward once. "Liara went after the turian who was with you when we found you."

Her neck prickled. "And?"

"Both gone by the time we got to the hangar. Someone left a calling card." Cold congealed in Shepard's chest while Garrus spoke. "He was in pretty bad shape when she went after him, Shepard, and Liara can take care of herself. I'm sure she'll get in contact when she can."

"You don't know him." she said, her voice almost lost in the waves.

His eyes flickered to her, mandibles tightening. "Someone does. Turian biotics aren't all that common, and the Hierarchy keeps tabs on them. If he went rogue, there's a big damn file on him somewhere."

Her hands moved to cover the track marks inside her arms. "Good."

He glanced at her hands, the grim set of her jaw. "We'll find them both."

The reeds to her left rustled and a shadow moved in the corner of her eye.

Biotics erupted from her skin as she lunged to her feet, gouging the sand in a silver spray. Her body vibrated with the force of them, icy sweat dewing her skin. A high-pitched whine rang in her ears. The ghost of a knife licked her throat; white tattoos twisted over bloodied azure skin.

A hare-like creature darted out from the reeds, its dark eyes throwing back the blue glow.

"Shepard."

Her pulse throbbed in her ears . Shepard forced her hands to relax and inhaled deeply, gritting her teeth. Hot rage gripped her ribs and rattled them like a convict in a prison riot. "Sorry. I don't know why I'm –" going crazy her mind supplied "- jumpy." she finished.

"You've spent the last two weeks in a cell with every expectation of ending up under Collector knives." The sand hissed as he shifted. "To say nothing of what the Shadow Broker's people did while they had you."

Shepard tasted salt and told herself it was the sea air. "So I got a couple of scrapes and some really shitty drugs with them. I shouldn't be –" she stopped, her flippant tone deserting her.

"Shouldn't you?"

She made no answer. It was impossible to speak through the vise around her throat.

"One of my squad on Omega," he began softly.

She turned to face him.

He moved cautiously, a short step, his hand coming up to graze her arm. She looked up at him. Biotics roiled over her. He touched her face and didn't flinch.

Shepard stepped forward and felt his arms come around her. His body jolted as the biotics crackling over her began to lick at him. She flinched back, dropping her arms but his hold on her tightened. "Stay."

She felt his talons running through her hair, over her face. His temple pressed against hers, plates sliding across her temple, rough ivory over bruised silk. His breath was warm on her cheek and she blinked against the sudden prickle in her eyes, her grip on him tightening. The frenzy ebbed, biotics seeping back into her skin like the sun sinking beneath the horizon. Her hands, clenched into fists against his back, slowly relaxed. Finally the blue light dwindled to nothingness, leaving them in silver-washed twilight once more. Her head fell, resting against his shoulder.

"What happened to him?"

His armor was chilly against her cheek. She felt the pressure of his chin against her crown as he tucked her against him more securely.

"One of my squad on Omega used to work security for freighters on the edge of the Terminus system. One trip, they were boarded by batarians pirates. Most of the crew were killed, but they did managed to broadcast a distress message before the rest of them were taken by the raiders." Garrus paused. Shepard felt a short series of vibrations twist through his chest before he continued, his voice distant, as though he was no longer quite seeing the waves or dunes. "They were taken to slave pens the batarians had set up on Aequitas." His talons stroked the short hair at the nape of her neck. "Batarians like to break their slaves before putting them on the market. Corvus spent three months in the pens before a Hierarchy patrol found the place and rescued them. Some of them were broken by it. Corvus told me there were times where he couldn't breathe for all the horrors in his head. He'd get into fights and pound his opponent halfway into the grave before he could stop himself. There were nights where he would spend hours just . . . staring at his gun. He told me it was a long time before any of those things went away."

He eased back, still holding her, and she looked up at him. "I saw your charts. I saw the marks on you. I heard you in your sleep." His voice lowered, roughened. "It may be a long time. But they fade. And you won't have to do it alone."

If he were someone else – Joker, or Mordin – she'd have deflected with a joke about them gunning for Kelly Chambers's position.

Instead she reached up, her palm curving along his jaw. Her thumb brushed against a rough ridge of scar tissue. "I'm glad you're here."

His eyes flickered across her face as though he were reading a line of poetry. She lifted her chin in invitation and heard the slight intake of his breath before his mouth came down on hers, tender, inquiring.

A warm rush flooded her veins. One hand cradled her head, the other slid down her back, slipping beneath the hem of her shirt, gauntlet cold against the sudden flush of heat in her skin. He teased her lips apart with gentle patience, drawing a muffled whimper from her. Shepard gripped his shoulders, pulling him closer. The slow burn of that kiss shattered into a riot of sparks as he broke away and returned, breathing uneven. The second time he eased away from her, the taste of him lingering in her mouth, her breathing a ragged counter to his.

She nestled into his chest, enveloped in the uniquely Garrus scent of musk and smoke. His mouth skimmed her jaw, moving to her neck. Heat coiled in her, charged and anticipatory. Her breath caught as he nipped lightly and she shivered, tensing.

He stopped immediately. "Shepard?" he asked. His voice was tight with worry and she felt him loosen his hold.

She cupped his face in her hands. "Don't stop."

He hesitated. Shepard stood on her toes, nuzzling into his neck in the way she knew drove him beyond reason. His talons dug into her back. She could feel his pulse speed up under her tongue. A low vibration built in his throat. Still, he held back. "Shepard, I don't want to take advantage any more than I have–"

"Garrus," she paused and pulled back to look him in the eye. "You aren't taking advantage." She returned to the rapid beat of his pulse. "So lose the armor," she said, and bit.

A long shudder went through him. Shepard held his eyes, waiting. Slowly, hesitating, he complied, his hands joining hers on the clasps of his armor. His mouth grazed her temple, a whisper that might have been her name stirring her hair as he slid his talons under the straps of her shirt. Her clothing joined his on the sand. The turian touched her with meticulous restraint, although the look in his eyes was anything but patient. He paused, hands gliding over her skin, gilded with starlight, careful of the marks and bandages on her body and the bruises deep in her muscles and bones. Sensation flared in the wake of his hands, lingering, but it wasn't enough, those echoes of touches.

Her hands linked beneath his fringe. Rough scars under her left hand, smooth skin under her right. "I'm not made of glass, Garrus."

A huff of laughter escaped him. "I'm well aware." His talons ghosted over her cheek. "I want this to be – I want you to be –" He stopped, leaned down the scant inches between them to kiss her. "Tell me what you need." He hesitated as he brushed the hair back from her face, and she realized that all the while that she had been walking through hell, he had been there beside her.

She traced the line of skin between the plates on his chest, covered his heart with her palm. "I'm not the only one who needs something, Garrus." He breathed her name and she swallowed the word, the rush of breath she took from his lungs as she kissed him.

She gasped as his talons brushed her breast. His hand trailed down her waist before coming to a possessive halt at her hip. The hint of a smile played over his face at her reaction. "I'll never stop needing you, Shepard."

She shifted closer, brought them skin to skin, nails raking down his back. "Then take me." She tilted her head in invitation, exposing the long line of her neck. The turian's eyes closed briefly, jaw clenching. Shepard traced aimless patterns over his back, following the smooth lines of skin between ridged plating. She pressed a kiss beneath his collarbone, her tongue skimming over salt-damp skin. His chest heaved once and she smiled. "I'll tell you if anything starts to hurt."

His eyes opened, gleaming with amusement. "Do you want Chakwas to kill me?" Despite his words, his hands were firm on her hips as he turned her, pressing her into him. He teased the shivery spot behind her ear, nibbling down her neck to her shoulder to mark her. Desire skipped through her and ran molten through her bloodstream. Frisson raced down her spine to the sharp pulse at her core.

Blue flickers snaked over her skin as the roar in her ears drowned out the waves. She twisted in his arms and pulled his mouth down to hers. His natural armor was rough against her skin, the friction against her breasts making her skin prickle and her breath catch. Her hips rolled of their own volition and he nipped at her lip in retribution, the growl in his chest breaking into an unsteady moan.

He tore away from her as she moved against him again. "Careful, Shepard." His eyes had gone dark and brilliant; his voice a velvet rasp and she knew his own control hung by tattered threads. The thought sent a ripple of anticipation through her. "Careful," he repeated as her hands skimmed down his ribs, ventured lower.

She was beyond being careful. Shepard dragged him down to the sand with her. "You worry too much."

He caught her before they hit the ground and rolled her beneath him. Sensation darted through her at the pressure of his body, the rise and fall of his chest against hers. She slid a leg up his side to wrap around him. His talons sifted through her hair. He met her eyes with a smile and a challenge. "Then take my mind off it."

As she reached for him, intending to do just that, he slid down in a trail of kisses and sharp little nips that wracked her with electricity, over her breasts and lingering on her waist and the quiver of her abdominals. His tongue brushed the hollow beside her hip, the line of her thigh and she arched into the sensation.

Shepard reached for his shoulders and he took her wrists, pinning them to the sand. She flinched, a startled exhale hissing between her teeth. She felt her body flicker as it had on the station, clenched her hands.

At once he released her. His eyes flew to hers. "Too much?" he asked.

Shepard took a steadying breath. Then another. The throb in her ears subsided. She focused on his eyes, the stormy blue-gray of the sky before sunrise.

She offered him a smile and her hands. "Take my mind off it."

He pressed a soft kiss to both of them before laying her hands beside her. Her fingers dug into the sand as she felt his breath warm on her thigh. He shot her a look latent with promise. "With pleasure."

ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME

Garrus caught her as she rolled off of him and she slid boneless to the sand. Shepard closed her eyes and gave in to the pleasurable fatigue that weighted every limb. Sparks of blue arced over her. Her pulse beat a slow, heavy tattoo against breathless lungs; beneath her suddenly heavy head, she could hear the steady beat of his heart as well. She felt his talons run up and down her thigh before venturing higher and hooked her leg over him. "I take it back. Chakwas is going to kill you."

"I'll die a happy turian." The sand whispered as they shifted. The turian's face was cast into shadow as he leaned over her, save for the bright glint of his eyes. His hand slid up her neck, stroked the hair back from her face. "Tired, Shepard?"

She chuckled. " I'm not done with you yet. Give me five minutes." Her hand joined his, their fingers twining.

He brought her hand to his mouth, teasing her wrist. "That long?"

She slid closer. "I'm open to persuasion."