I do not condone underage drinking, smoking, or illegal substance abuse. In the wise words of Chef, there's a time and a place for everything and it's called college.

It was just after 10:30pm when Eric and Kyle pulled up in front of the Stevens' house. The two boys kept quiet for most of the drive. It had started off on an uncomfortable note as Eric struggled to get his mom's garbage car to start. He thought about trying to make conversation with Kyle. He also thought about saying fuck it to Bebe's shitty party and pulling over on the side of the road to pick up where they left off. He did neither. Instead, he distracted himself from the tense atmosphere by meticulously scanning the road for elk.

They had been so close to kissing in the bathroom. Eric's stomach felt tight every time he remembered how close they'd been. Why hadn't he been able to just go for it? He had been rehearsing a similar scene in his head all week, where he effortlessly wooed Kyle with his natural charm and nonchalance. Instead, he froze up. Got stage fright. Eric's acting skills has never failed him like this before. Why was he so nervous around Kyle lately? He just kept telling himself that it was just the lack of sleep and withdrawal from tasting Kyle's blood.

Eric glanced over at the passenger seat. Kyle was silently staring out the passenger window, looking a little dazed. It wasn't clear how drunk he was, but Kyle was acting totally different than usual. He seemed calmer, much less conceited and Jew-y. His movements were looser and more fluid. Kyle was currently leaning his head languidly against the seat. His shoulders were relaxed, and his neck was stretched to the side in a way that Eric found incredibly sexy. Sexy? Eric stifled a frustrated groan. He needed to pull his shit together or else this party was not going to go as planned.

Bebe lived on the edge of South Park right where the town met the woods, a convenient location to throw a rager. The whole block was already packed with cars. Eric found parking further down the street. The temperature had dropped significantly in the past few hours, and both boys shivered as they stepped out of the car. Eric was wearing his black windbreaker. Kyle had unfortunately left his coat in Stan's car. He wrapped his arms around himself for warmth.

"If you want, my mom has a polar fleece in the back."

"I don't want to wear your mom's coat," Kyle said bluntly.

Eric arched an eyebrow. "Are you sure? It's plush."

Kyle snorted, his breath coming out in a puff of white. "I'm good. Let's just get inside the house."

As they approached Bebe's front yard they saw several groups of people standing out front smoking. Craig and Tweek were leaning on the side of the house, sharing joint and laughing about something on Craig's phone. The goth kids were sitting on the ground spouting some bullshit about how the cold weather matched how they felt on the inside. A group of giggling girls huddled in a circle were passing around a cigarette. Eric felt his throat tighten as he locked eyes with Heidi Turner.

"What the fuck is he doing here?" Milly Larsen spat when she saw the reason for her friend's sudden mood shift.

Eric looked away from the girls and quickly walked towards the door. Kyle followed behind.

"Fuck you, Eric Cartman!" Red shouted drunkenly, waving her middle finger at his back.

Heidi pulled her friend's arm down. "Just ignore him," she muttered. Her friends turned away begrudgingly.

"Are you alright?" Kyle asked as he shut the front door behind them. Eric opened his mouth to reply, but he was suddenly interrupted by Kenny throwing his arms around Eric's shoulders and forcibly knocking him backward into the doorframe.

"You came!" he yelled excitedly. "You fucking came!" Before Eric could react, Kenny spun around and enveloped Kyle in the same crushing bear hug.

"Hey Kenny," Kyle said, wheezing through his cramped lungs. Eric growled and grabbed the blonde boy by the neck. He shook him until he let go of Kyle. Kyle looked horrified. "Jesus, Cartman! Let him go!"

"This is what you get for fucking with me all week, Kenny."

Kenny grinned weakly and whispered, "How did you know this was my kink?" Revolted, Eric immediately released him. Kenny laughed hoarsely.

"Ok fuck," he said, stretching his neck tenderly to the side. "This is so fucking awesome, though! We're all at the same party! Can you believe in all the years we've been friends we have never gotten fucked up together? This is going to be so much fun, so would you stop fucking glaring at me, Eric. I promise you can have Kyle all to yourself after we do a few rounds of shots."

"I drove here, Kenny. I shouldn't be drinking tonight," Eric grumbled. Truthfully he didn't give two shits about being a responsible driver. He just didn't feeling out of control. Last time he had alcohol was in middle school when he drank a bunch of his mom's vodka when she was out one evening. He got totally smashed and decided to find out what Mr. Kitty's blood tasted like. You know what they say, curiosity killed the Mr. Kitty.

"Fuck that!" Kenny shouted. "I'm getting you drunk. You too, Kyle."

"I'm already drunk," Kyle said flatly.

"Nice! So am I!" Kenny grabbed Kyle's arm and dragged him down the hallway. As Eric watched them disappear into the crowd he had a moment to take in his surroundings. The vibe was a complete 180 from Wendy's fundraiser dance. He was surprised by how many people were there. He recognized a lot kids from their school, but there were just as many unfamiliar faces. Humans were packed into every corner, some laughing, some aggressively making out. A large group of people were sloppily dancing in the middle of the living room to some EDM song he didn't recognize. The looseness he had been admiring in Kyle's physique was visible in everyone's body language. The house reeked of alcohol, weed, and sweat.

He followed after Kenny and Kyle, moving deeper into the house. He found them both in the kitchen, which now resembled a slaughterhouse with all the mysterious substances spilled across the counter and floor. The dining room had been converted into a beer pong arena. People were tightly crammed around the table, shouting enthusiastically. He saw a tortilla chip stuck to the wall with tape. He couldn't even begin to imagine the story behind that.

Kenny was pouring a clear liquid from an unlabeled bottle into three shot glasses on the counter. He held one out to Kyle and then Eric. Eric hesitated, but took it.

"Just one," he said sternly.

Kenny smiled mischievously. "Here's to you two coming," he said, raising the shot glass. He tipped it back without hesitation. Kyle followed suit, closing his eyes in disgust as he gulped down whatever liquid hell was in the glass. Eric shot Kenny a threatening look and then drank his shot. It tasted like demon ass, but he managed to hold his puh-puh-puh-poker face.

"And hopefully you'll come again later tonight, am I right?" Kenny added, his smile widening. Kyle blushed and Eric glared. Kenny just chuckled as he handed Kyle a plastic cup, which Kyle readily accepted. He looked a little desperate to wash away the horrid aftertaste of the shot. Kyle took one sip and groaned.

"There's alcohol in this too, isn't there?"

"It's just a rum and coke, Kyle. Don't worry so much." Kenny patted Kyle reassuringly on the shoulder. Kenny quickly took another shot and then turned to Eric. "So… Cartman… you wanna get high?"

Eric glanced curiously at Kyle. "Don't look at me," Kyle answered. "Do whatever the fuck you want."

"Ok, sure," he said noncommittally.

"Sweet! Follow me."

The three boys headed up the stairs to Bebe's bedroom. As Kenny opened the door gray smoke floated out into the hallway. The room was hazy and dimly lit. Bebe was laying on her bed, texting. Nichole Daniels was sitting on the floor with a few girls Eric didn't recognize. Jimmy was chilling on a hot pink beanbag chair packing a bowl, next to a passed out Towelie. Bebe looked up when they walked into the room. She frowned when she made eye contact with Eric.

"Who invited Cartman?" she asked.

"I did," Kenny said as he flopped down on the bed beside her. "Please forgive me!" he exclaimed dramatically.

"Whatever," Bebe said rolling her eyes. "Just shut the fucking door." Eric closed the door and sat down on the floor near the others. Kyle sat next to him, quietly sipping his drink. Bebe pulled a small plastic bag out of her bra and threw it at Jimmy. "Feel free to put the rest of Towelie's coke in there."

"You g… g… got it," Jimmy said, sprinkling the white powder over the weed.

"I'm feeling a little out of my depth," Kyle said under his breath. Eric looked at him, noticing his anxious posture.

"We can go if you want."

"Hey, I have a joint with just weed if you guys would rather smoke that," Kenny said. He must've noticed their worried expressions.

"I'm good. I wasn't planning on smoking anyway," Kyle said.

"Getting high at one party won't keep you from being valedictorian, Kyle," said Nichole, rolling her eyes. She and Wendy had the highest GPAs in the school after Kyle.

"You really should be worried about getting high at two parties," Kenny chimed in, reaching down and poking Nichole in her side. She squeaked and smacked his shoulder.

"Yeah, cause then you'll be as dumb as Kenny," she shot back.

"Be nice, g… guys," Jimmy stuttered. "Kyle is the only one who puh-paid any attention in Health."

"Drugs are bad, m'kay," said Bebe, not looking up for her phone. All the girls started laughing hysterically. Kyle laughed too, but then he glanced uneasily into his cup. On impulse Eric grabbed the cup out of Kyle's hand and chugged the rest of it.

As he wiped his mouth he mumbled, "Can't let you have all the fun." Kyle smiled, looking relieved.

Jimmy took the first hit off the bong and then passed it to Bebe. Bebe set down her phone and took a huge rip, which caused her to have a violent coughing fit. Condescendingly, Kenny wiped a tear streaming down her cheek.

"Poor princess."

"Fuck off Kenny! You're the princess!" she said through her coughs. Kenny laughed, took an expert hit off the bong, and passed it to Nichole.

By the time the bong was handed to Eric most of the coke was burned through. Eric was glad. He didn't want Kenny to think he was a pussy, but he also wasn't super eager to do cocaine. Eric lit the bowl, removed it, and sucked the smoke through the chamber. He held it in his lungs for a few seconds before blowing it out. The smoke singed his throat causing him to cough a few times, but he quickly recovered. He felt like he had met his quota for peer pressured substance abuse, and now Kenny would probably leave him alone for the rest of the night.

Eric noticed Kyle was staring at him with an odd expression on his face. "What?"

Kyle shook his head and blushed. "Nothing."

Energetically, Kenny jumped off the bed and stretched his arms in the air. "Woo hoo! I'm high as shit! Come on, let's all go dance!" Bebe, Nichole, and one of the other girls followed his lead. The other two grabbed the bong and moved to sit closer Jimmy. Towelie continued to be unconscious.

Eric stood up as the group was filing out of the bedroom. He noticed his heart was pounding. Casually, he glanced over his shoulder at Kyle, who in turn met his gaze.

"I don't like dancing," Eric said, an acrid aftertaste settling in the back of his mouth.

Kyle grinned. "Dancing fucking sucks dude."

Eric had a sudden desire for fresh air. Trying not to think about it, he laced his hand into Kyle's and pulled him down the stairs.

"Follow me."

More people had arrived at the party while they were upstairs. Bodies surrounded them on all sides. Someone had turned up the music, and Eric could feel the bass pulsing through the floorboards. Wadding through the crowed house had him close to sensory overload. He couldn't tell if it was his vampire senses or the drugs that were making everything around him so vivid and intense. Probably both. Like a lifeline, he focused all his attention on Kyle's hand. Solid, real, and wrapped tightly around his own.

Finally they reached the sliding back door. It was still freezing outside, but the cold air felt good after the suffocating heat of the party. A chilly breeze blew against Eric's uncovered face and neck. His arms and legs were tingling with energy. His whole body felt heavy and weightless at the same time.

Eric was brought back to Earth when he felt Kyle let go of his hand. In its absence, an icy vacuum sucked all the warmth from Eric's palm. Feeling dejected, Eric turned around to see Kyle pulling his vibrating cell phone out of his pocket.

"Shit," Kyle muttered as he accepted the call. He took a deep breath and raised the phone to his ear. "Hey Mom… Sorry I forgot to call you. I'm staying at Stan's house tonight."

Eric exhaled in frustration. He was going to be super pissed if he got cockblocked by Shelia Broflovski.

"…Yes, I'm really sorry! I was just having so much fun I forgot! …Yeah. It won't happen again. …Ok, bye. Yeah, I love you too."

Kyle sighed as he hung up. "Did I sound ok? I didn't sound super drunk or anything, right?"

Eric gave him a thumbs up. "You sounded totally sober."

"Wow. That's cool cause I am totally not," Kyle laughed and gave Eric a half-hearted thumbs up back.

"Sorry your mom's such a bi–"

"Shut the fuck up, Cartman!" Kyle snapped. "Don't ruin this! Jesus, can you please try not to be a fucking asshole for one second of your life?"

"That's impossible," a familiar voice said from behind the boys. They turned and saw Heidi stepping through the sliding glass door. She was holding an unlit cigarette and moving slowly, like she was afraid of falling. "Eric can't help being an asshole." she said dryly.

Eric tensed and looked away. Kyle crossed his arms uncomfortably and offered a small wave.

"Hey Heidi."

"Hey Kyle," she said, lighting the cigarette. "I don't understand why you guys still hang out with him when you know he's constantly manipulating you."

Eric gritted his teeth. "I don't want to do this right now, Heidi."

"Whatever, Eric," she said as she exhaled a stream of white smoke. "You haven't changed at all. You're still the same piece of shit you were in elementary school."

"Well what about you? You haven't changed either! You're still the same raging bitch!"

Heidi laughed. "You spineless water bear. Breaking up with you was the best decision I ever made in my life!"

"Fuck this!" Eric blurted. "Fuck you! Fuck this!" He stormed off around the side of the house. His heart was beating faster than usual. The confrontation made him feel like it was going to explode.

"Hold on, Cartman!" Kyle shouted as he came running after him. Eric ignored him and kept walking. "Oh come on! Just wait a fucking sec–aaah!"

Kyle fell to the ground with a thud. Eric froze in anticipation of what he was sure was going to be the intoxicating scent of Kyle's blood washing over his senses. As if he wasn't fucking intoxicated enough. The smell didn't come. He cautiously looked back, and when saw Kyle struggling to get up, Eric hurried over to help him.

"Are you hurt?" Eric asked as he lifted Kyle to his feet. The two of them were standing on the small path between the side of the house and the fence lining the perimeter.

Kyle tightly gripped the sides of Eric's jacket and leaned his head forward into Eric's shoulder. "Jesus, the ground feels wobbly. Why the fuck did I drink so much?"

Eric snickered, "You're such a fucking lightweight."

"Hey fuck you! I had like three different things."

"So did I, and I am nowhere near as fucked up as you!"

"Fuck, you are an asshole," Kyle grumbled. Eric took a step back. "Shit, wait, I didn't mean–"

"It's fine dude," he sighed. "You're drunk."

Kyle lowered his eyes. "Sorry about what happened back there. I should've defended you..."

"It's okay. Besides I probably deserved it." Eric cleared his throat awkwardly and waited, but Kyle didn't say anything. "Look, it was a long time ago. Despite what she said, both of us are different people now. What happened back then doesn't matter anymore."

"Weren't you just using her to get to Mars or something?"

"What? No. Fuck Mars. I wasn't using Heidi for anything. I..." Loved her. "Uh… I really liked her. But I didn't know how to deal with that, and I pretty much sabotaged our relationship so she would break up with me."

"Huh. I just thought she dumped you when she realized you were a terrible person."

"Well, yeah..." Eric felt self-conscious. He really didn't like talking about Heidi while he was high. "I am a terrible person."

"I know."

Eric sighed again, feeling frustrated. "Yeah, so, Heidi was right! I drive people away because I use them to get what I want! So if you don't want to be around me I get it."

"What do you want, Cartman?" Kyle asked, looking directly at him now. "What do you want from me?"

Eric wanted to shatter Kyle's composure. Ever since they met, Eric found a sickening satisfaction from breaking down Kyle's perfect little Jew persona. He knew he was the only one that could push Kyle to the boiling point, when all the pent up anger he hid from everyone else, even Stan, would bubble over, hissing and spitting, sometimes literally in his face. Now, as they stood in the freezing cold, with his pulse pounding in his ears, Eric realized how desperate he was to keep pushing Kyle. He wanted Kyle to come completely undone for him. He reached out and dragged his thumb across the side of Kyle's face, savoring the way his eyes closed and his mouth softened as he leaned into Eric's touch.

"Everything," Eric whispered maliciously. "I want you to give me everything."

Kyle's eyes flicked opened. They stared into Eric's, cold and unblinking. When he answered, it sounded like a dare.

"Take it."

Without missing a beat, Eric threw Kyle roughly against the side of the house. He pushed his face into Kyle's neck, pressing messy kisses up and down his throat.

"Fuck!" Kyle gasped. He reached his arms under Eric's jacket and around his back, trying to pull their bodies closer together. Eric obliged, pushing Kyle flush against the wall. They both groaned at the contact, but they still didn't feel close enough. Eric kissed along Kyle's sharp jawline. He scraped his teeth harshly over Kyle's earlobe and was rewarded with the bite of Kyle's nails digging into the fabric of his t-shirt.

"You fucking pussy," Kyle hissed into Eric's his ear. "You don't have the balls to kiss me on the mouth."

Eric grabbed the sides of Kyle's face and glared at him viciously. "What the fuck did you say to me, Jew?"

"I said just fucking kiss me already, you fat piece of–" Kyle began, but the rest of his insult was muffled against Eric's lips.

Neither of them had much experience when it came to kissing. Besides the handful of elementary school romances and insufferable games of spin the bottle, they were essentially novices. Yet right now Eric couldn't give less of a shit about technique. Their mouths opened on instinct. Their teeth knocked together unpleasantly, but neither of them tried to pull away. Eric shoved his tongue forcefully into Kyle's mouth, and he relished in the subtle coppery flavor of the tender flesh inside. Every piece of skin Eric tasted was soft and raw. He could taste hints of Kyle's blood everywhere. On his lips… on his gums… on his tongue. Eric felt ravenous.

Kyle gasped for air as Eric aggressively traced his tongue along every inch of his mouth. He brought his hands up to Eric's hair and laced his fingers tightly around the silky, brown strands. Kyle pulled Eric's head back, panting as their lips broke apart. Kyle was flushed to the tips of his ears. His lips looked slightly swollen. Tightening his grip on Eric's hair, Kyle leaned forward and ran his tongue slowly across Eric's upper lip. Eric moaned, and Kyle brought their lips together again. He pressed his tongue into Eric's mouth and slid it roughly against Eric's teeth. Suddenly, Kyle shrieked and jerked away.

"Aaaagh! Ow ow!" he cried, covering his mouth with his hand. Eric froze in place, knowing all too well what had happened. He had felt Kyle's tongue sink into his fang before he had even realized they extended.

Kyle stumbled backward and gripped the wall of the house for support. Eric watched, horrified, as Kyle pulled his hand away from his face covered in blood. Blood and saliva were trickling out of Kyle's open mouth and over his bottom lip. From where he was standing, Eric could smell it pouring out of the sliced skin on Kyle's tongue. Their eyes met. Kyle's were watering in pain.

"Wha–wha wath tha?" Kyle sputtered, looking frightened and confused. Eric just stood there, stupefied. Kyle's fear quickly turned to anger. "Wha the fuck wath tha?" Eric couldn't make his mouth form words. His voice was caught in his throat. "You bath'tar!" Kyle yelled, lunging towards Eric and grabbing him by the front of his shirt. "Whath going on?"

Eric was immediately overwhelmed by the scent of blood on Kyle's breath. Though his head high had previously plateaued it was now rushing to a new peak. The ground was spinning. Eric tried to pull himself away, but he lost his balance and fell. Kyle was dragged down on top of him.

"Ah!"

The impact knocked the wind out of Eric. He gasped and wheezed, struggling to inhale. Kyle groaned and lifted himself up onto his arms. His eyes went wide with shock when he looked into Eric's open mouth.

"Nuh uh." Kyle started inching back slowly. "Nuh way. Wha the fuck are tho'th?"

Eric knew he was about to completely lose it. Soon his instincts would take over. Kyle had to get away from him as fast as possible. "Run," Eric whispered hoarsely. Kyle didn't need to be told a second time. He staggered to his feet and started running.

Suddenly Eric felt incredibly calm. His heart rate slowed and his breathing became even. The frenzied thoughts in his head evaporated like smoke. He no longer felt any sense of urgency.

Why would he? He knew there was no way for his prey to escape.